I couldn't teleport or 'zap' anywhere.

Even though I hadn't been involved in the fall of the Angels, I couldn't magically get around because the Gates of Heaven were locked, where we would momentarily be when teleporting from place to place.

I walked through the streets of Lebanon, Kansas, looking around, sure that at least one Angel would have fallen here, or made their way here.

I could hear Dean praying. "Screw it. Okay, listen up. This one goes out to any Angel with their ears on. This is Dean Winchester. And I need your help. The deal is... Linwood Memorial Hospital, Randolph, New York. The first one who can help me gets my help in return. And you know that ain't nothing. Hell, it's no secret that we haven't always seen eye to eye. But you know that I am good for my word. And, uh, I wouldn't be asking if I wasn't needing, so..."

I shook my head. "No, Dean."

I turned around, walking down the way, looking for something that would get me to Randolph, New York now.

I saw a car I liked in an alley, walking toward it, looking around to make sure no one was around, looking at the car curiously, noticing that the roof was fabric and could be pulled back to expose the rest of the car, pulling it back, hearing someone approach from behind, turning around.

An Angel stood there. "I know you. Octavia."

"You're an Angel," I told her.

The Angel nodded. "My name is Hael. But, am I still an Angel? What's an Angel without its wings?"

*   *

Hael and I were leaning against the hood of the car I had found.

"It was a normal day, and then just... dark," Hael told me. "And then I was just... falling. How could that happen?"

I looked away. "I don't know."

"You were brought back," Hael told me. "But it was so soon ago. You're still not completely healed, are you?"

"Not completely, no," I answered. "But I am close."

I looked down.

Hael looked at me curiously. "You don't have to lie, Octavia. I can't imagine what you went through, but I know the pain isn't something you move on or heal from quickly."

"I'm not at my best, but I'm good enough," I told her.

Hael nodded cautiously. "That sounded like a warning."

"Do you need to be warned?" I asked, opening my jacket to show Hael my Angel Sword.

Hael noticed, taking a deep breath. "You've heard them, haven't you? On Angel Radio. Our brothers and sisters. Many still circling for vessels, most just... so afraid."

"There's nothing to be afraid of," I told her.

"But Heaven..." Hael trailed off. "There was order. There was purpose."

"Well, believe it or not, there may be something even better down here," I told her.

"I don't understand," Hael told me.

"There's opportunity for you, the others who have fallen, to finally do what you would like to do," I told her. "Not just what you've been told."

"And what would I like to do?" Hael asked.

"You tell me," I told her. "If you could do anything, what would it be?"

Hael took a moment to consider. "There's a place. I built it when I was last here. Many years ago. A grand canyon."

"The Grand Canyon?" I asked.

"Yes," Hael answered. "I--I would like to see that."

"You go see the Grand Canyon, then," I told her, standing, walking toward the driver's side of the car. "I'll be going to Randolph, New York."

Hael stood. "To help Dean Winchester, you mean?" I turned to face her. Hael turned to me. "I heard his prayer. That's why I wanted to reach you, before you caught up to them. You know that not all of our siblings are wandering around in confusion. And not all of them are willing to forgive and forget. They will use you and use the Winchesters to get to Castiel. They know that he is the reason we fell."

I stepped closer. "No, Metatron is the reason you fell. Cas didn't know what was going to happen."

"Not many Angels will believe that," Hael told me.

"I don't care what they believe," I told her. "It's the truth. I have to get to them before something happens. Please just leave."

I turned to the car.

"There is a war out, and it's out on you," Hael told me. I looked up in annoyance, turning to face her. "It's on Castiel. It's on the Winchesters. Angels will go after your precious humans to get to you. Going to help them, going to be with them, will only put them in danger. Are you willing to do that?"

I sighed in annoyance. "What is this, an intervention? I don't need one, thank you."

"Then you realize that you going to help them will only put them in more danger," Hael told me.

"Why do you care?" I asked.

"I don't," Hael answered. 

"I don't want to hurt you," I told her. "I don't want to put them in danger, I didn't want to hurt any of them. I want to help."

"And that will always be your downfall," Hael told me. "Helping has led to your death once before. It could very well lead to your death again. And this time, you might not be able to come back. But you can help anyone in the condition you're in. They will hunt you and your friends. Until their last breath, they will seek revenge on the Angel that did this, who destroyed Heaven. And if they can't find him, they will find the ones that will know where he is."

"Stop," I told her.

"They will seek a vengeance on Castiel, and they will do untold things to you and to the Winchesters to find him, things that will make God striking down Lucifer seem like child's play," Hael told me.

I lost my patience. "And are you one of them?" 

"I might very well be," Hael answered, lowering her Angel Blade from her sleeve, slashing toward me. I ducked. Hael tried to drive the blade through me. I pivoted to make her miss. Hael raised her blade to stab me. I blocked the move with my sword, twisting it, making us both spin away, face each other. "You're still not up to top shape for a big fight like this, Ava."

"I am enough to get by," I told her, raising the sword over my head, trying to stab Hael.

Hael used her blade to block the move. I spun, slashing the sword toward her. Hael used her blade to block the move. We tried the same move, ending up blocking each other. Hael tried to slash into me. I spun away to make her miss, turning to face her the same instant Hael slashed into my stomach with the blade, making me groan in pain, Grace leaking out with blood.

"Tell me where Castiel is, Octavia," Hael told me.

"I have... no clue," I told her. Hael raised her blade to try to stab me repeatedly. I kept my sword raised to block her every time, twisting the sword around Hael's blade, pulling it free, making the Angel Blade fall out of her hands, running her through with my sword, killing her, making her flash with bright white light, pulling the sword out, letting Hael's body fall, breathing heavily. I looked at the renewed wound in my stomach, groaning in pain and annoyance. "Damn it."

I looked into the car to see a cellphone, pulling it out, thinking, trying to remember Sam's number, but since I had never needed to use it before, it was kind of hard. I remembered, typing in the number, making the call.

Dean answered. "Who is this?"

"Dean."

"Ava, what the... Where are you?"

"I, uh..." I leaned against the car for support, sighing, holding a hand over my bleeding stomach. "I kind of got into a sword fight with an another Angel."

"What? Are you okay?"

"Not really."

"Ava, you're not all the way back. You shouldn't be fighting with your own kind."

"Thanks, Mom, I know that. But she was looking for Cas."

"Yeah, a lot of people are looking for Cas. Hey, speaking of..."

"What?"

"Metatron took Cas' Grace."

"What?"

"He's human." I sighed, leaning my head against the car. "Seriously, Ava, where are you?"

"In an alley, trying to make sure my Grace doesn't bleed out."

"Awesome. Look, it's okay. Just get to the bunker. You'll be able to heal yourself up there completely without risking getting yourself killed again."

I hesitated, looking down. "I can't."

"What? What do you mean, you can't?"

"The Angel... she had a point, Dean. She said that Angels would be after you and Sam to get to Cas to get their revenge."

"Yeah, that means that they're after you, too."

"Which means that they can use you to get to me if they can't get to Cas. Now, if I'm with you two at the bunker, then it will be like a beacon for all of the Angels to find us, Dean. I have to stay away. To keep both of you safe."

"What--why would it be a beacon?"

"Because I am an Angel, and Angels can find other Angels, even if the place they're living in is warded to no end. Especially when I had to kill one here in Lebanon. But, if I'm far away, then that will draw them to me, and not to you."

"You're not healed enough to take on that many Angels alone."

"I know. Which is why I'm taking them on one at a time. See, it's not just the Winchesters against the world." I hesitated in guilt, sighing. "Just... tell Sam I'm sorry."

"Ava--"

I hung up, looking down, sighing, holding a hand to my stomach, sliding down the side of the car to the ground weakly until I was healed enough to drive.

Coming back from the dead took a serious toll on the body.

I could not wait until I healed enough to not have to worry about this anymore.