Barry's POV

Before my parents had died, my life had been simple. Wake up, go to school, come home, repeat the day. At times, I thought that it was boring as hell, but now that things aren't so simple anymore, I missed those days. When did things get so complicated?

After talking to Raven, things only seemed to get more complicated. We told Cisco and the others about what was going on with her, which didn't go quite that well. Of course everyone was confused and upset about it, but some of them had...different ideas. Caitlin threw up the idea to just stay in her doppleganger's body, but Raven quickly shot that down. She said that she wasn't going to just steal someone's body, especially since it was  a death sentence for her duplicate.

When I first heard that idea thrown around, I thought the same as Raven had. But as time had slowly moved on, I started to wonder if it wasn't that bad of an idea. I sure as hell didn't want to lose our Raven, and this way, she would still be with us, even in her own body. All of this was my fault in the first place...why should Raven have to pay for what I did?

But of course, I realized that even that was wrong; we couldn't let someone else die for my wrongdoings either. So, Raven switched back with her doppleganger, getting both of their bodies back. As for the doppleganger, we decided to let her go. She was only doing all of this for her sister. We decided that we'd keep an eye on her if she went off the rails and used her powers for bad, so she agreed.

Before we let her go, I made sure to tell her that we couldn't help her sister. We wanted to; I wanted to, but it just wasn't something we could do. Instead, I told her to spend as much time with her as she possibly could; to still hold onto hope. I made sure to let her know that if she needed anything, we were here. We were always here.

Ever since then, things have slowed down, but  just a notch. I've been working on being The Flash while Cisco and the others have been working on fixing Raven. Of course, I've been helping to, but sometimes that's hard when there's a new problem arising around Central City; such as the new rogues and a monster that was only a hologram. It's been a little different working solo again, but I knew it was only temporary; it was worth it, if it saves Raven in the end.

"Find anything yet?" I ask as I walk into the cortex, finding Cisco sitting at one of the computers in the center of the room. He turns and faces me then, and that was when I realized that Caitlin was no where to be found. "Where's Caitlin?"

He licks his lips slowly. "Nothing on Raven...we've ran almost every test, Barry, and they all show the same thing: nothing is wrong with her. Caitlin had to um...step out for awhile. I'm not sure what came over her."

I lick my lips slowly as I stare at the floor for a moment. "Cisco, don't sugar coat anything when it comes to Raven, okay? I want you to always tell me the absolute truth-"

"I know," he cuts me off, nodding his head in a sad manner. I could tell that he was tearing himself up about all of this just as much as I was, and it wasn't even his fault. "The truth is Barry, we can't really do anything to help her if we don't...if we don't even know what's wrong with her. We need some sort of diagnosis, and we don't have that."

I take a deep breath, asking myself why things had to be this way. But I still had hope...she's been worse than this; she can make it through this. How'd I know that? Because now she has us.

"Keep running tests," I tell Cisco as I glance around one more time. "Where is she, anyways?"

"I'd check her room," he says, but he didn't have to tell me that she was most likely there; she was always there it seemed. "She likes to go there to think."

I nod my head towards him before I leave the cortex, heading towards the room, hoping to find her there. I made sure to check up on her quite frequently, especially since she's going through this, and we're also dealing with Alchemy still. It scared me to know that she's going through internal struggles while there's also an outside threat; one that we barely know anything about.

I just hoped that whatever does happen, we're okay in the end.

-*+*-

Raven's POV

Tests, tests, and more tests. That's all that my life has consisted of the past few days. It wasn't as bad as some would think, but the constant knowing that I only had to complete them because I was dying was what made them the worst.

Cisco always tried to lighten the mood when we were doing them, but Caitlin, who still wasn't fond of me, just wanted to get it over with. I didn't blame her; if I were her, I wouldn't want to help me either. Iris has been the nicest out of everyone however; she was always stopping by and leaving me some form of sweet, such as brownies, so of course it brightened my mood. I was happy to have a true friend...one that I never used to have before.

Barry has been making sure to stay with me as well, but of course, he's still The Flash. He's been gone helping the city most of the time, which was okay; it was what he was supposed to do. I offered to help him many times, but every time, he told me to stay behind and focus on getting better, even though I wasn't sure how I was supposed to do that when I didn't even know what was wrong with me.

As for getting better, things were only seeming to get worse. Cisco and Caitlin tried making something up to help with the pain, to help me get some sleep at night, but they stopped working. The stomach ache continued to grow, the nights started to get longer, my eyelids started to get heavier, and time felt as if it was slowly running out.

The lack of sleep has led to me hallucinating quite frequently...when I was alone most of the time. It wasn't that I really saw things, it was more-so hearing things. It was as if there was this voice in my ear, whispering to me the things that could be; I could be healthy, I could be Silver Trickster again, and I could be myself again. It was strange hearing these things, but it was better than hearing worse things.

It wasn't until last night I started seeing things. Visions of what the voice in my ear was telling me; things such as Barry and I, happy. The rest of the team was there too, all smiles and no worries. I couldn't decide if it made me feel better or if it made me feel worse; since I knew that it was far from reality.

When I wasn't getting tested, I was in my room, thinking to myself about everything. Tears weren't an uncommon thing to me anymore, but that was okay. I've gone this many years of my life holding back the urge to let it out, so it felt good to be able to do that now.

"Knock knock," I hear Barry say as I flick my eyes upwards from my drawing pad, closing it quickly. He gives me a look as I try to play it off cooly. "What's that?"

I shake my head. "It's nothing; just my drawing pad-"

"You draw?" he raises his eyebrows, clearly interested.

"I mean, I guess so," I shrug as he walks over to me, sitting down on the edge of the bed. "I used to draw a lot as a kid, but that stopped around the time Hunter..."

I didn't have to finish for Barry to get the memo. "Can I see?"

"They're really bad," I claim, hoping to get him to lose interest, but of course I knew deep down that he wouldn't give up. He starts to deny my statement as I hand over the notebook, my heart beating faster in my chest for some reason. I've never shown anyone my drawings besides my parents.

He flips open the drawing pad as he skims through it, his fingers tracing over the pencil lines I had drawn. "Raven, these are really good!"

I bring my knees to my chest as I bury the bottom of my face in my legs, hiding my faint smile. "They're just quick doodles...nothing special. I guess I can thank my interest in photography for putting the ideas in my head. Plus, I can't sleep...so it passes the time."

Barry flips to another page then as he stops, looking at my most recent drawing. It takes me a moment to realize what he was looking at. "What is this?"

I lean forwards then as I stare at the paper, wondering to myself what I had even drawn. It appeared to be some type of rock; one that was emitting a blue light. There were symbols and shapes carved on the rock, but they were hard to make out.

"I don't know," I whisper almost to myself, taking the drawing pad from his hands and studying it for myself. I couldn't have drawn this...could I have?

Barry decides to brush it off. "How are you doing, though? Any changes?"

I stare at the notebook for a long moment before shoving it to the side, my eyes drifting back towards the bed. "Just the same hallucinations that I told you about...but they are getting worse."

"How worse?" Barry questions me again, furrowing his eyebrows.

I take a deep breath. "Well, it's like I'm in a dream, but I'm not dreaming because I'm awake. Before it had just been the voices that I told you about, but now it's images. Last night was when it started...I saw things like the team and you and I...happy."

My voice drifts off then as Barry gives me a puzzling yet heartbroken look. "That's all you've been seeing?"

I nod my head, noticing a different type of tone in his voice. "Yeah, why?"

He sighs, and I knew that what he was about to say was something that was going to cause all of us a lot of headaches. "Wally has been dreaming too...about his life in flashpoint. Which means-"

"Alchemy is coming for him," I finish for him, my jaw opening slightly at the news. Finally, I clicked it all in my head. "You think my visions are the same as him?"

He shakes his head, resting his hand on my knee. "I hope not. Yours aren't really dreams, and as far as I'm aware, you weren't there in flashpoint, so there's no need for Alchemy to come after you. What's happening to you is something else."

"Something we can't figure out how to fix," I drift off, my eyes trailing back down to the bed.

Barry quickly is lifting my head back up with his hand as he rests it against my cheek, my eyes connecting with his once again. "We're going to figure this out, okay? Don't lose hope yet. Cisco and Caitlin are genius' when it comes to helping people, myself included. You've got us now to help you."

I raise my eyebrows at one of his sentences. "I know I have you guys, but I don't think Caitlin is that interested in helping me."

Barry's eyes go slightly cold. "Caitlin is a person that can be hard to figure out sometimes. She'll come around. Just give her time."

"Okay," I nod towards him as he holds his hand on my cheek, longer than what was needed. For a moment, I thought he was going to kiss me, but instead, he lowers his hand finally and faintly smiles at me, standing up from the bed.

"Your drawings are really good," he tells me, looking down towards my notepad. "Thanks for showing me them."

A grin appears on my face then. "Not very many people have seen that drawing pad before, Allen. You're one of the rare few."

He shoots me another smile. "I must be pretty special then."

I smile. "You've always been special to me."

Barry smiles at me one last time before he exits the room, leaving me alone once again. The smile stays on my face as I open up the drawing pad one more time, wondering to myself about my visions, my illness, and my random drawing. I tried not to let it bother me, but something kept pulling me towards it.

What if they were all connected?

-*+*-

wow I didn't realize it had been this long since I'd updated. my deepest apologies! I hope you guys all had a happy holidays!

as for the chapter, sorry it was a little dry and boring, but it's important, since it's setting up something for later down the line, just trust me. also, there was a bit of a time jump, since I wanted to start getting to the good stuff, so basically I just skipped 3x4 and 3x5, nothing too special! what are your thoughts so far though?

vote n' comment! <3