Author: Phope5

The Review

Cover, Title and Description

I think you could do a bit better in the cover bit. The 'holding hands' look good but the additional characters you added didn't really go well with the cover, at least in my eyes. It isn't that attractive.

The title is quite common, a lot of people use this kind of a title, but it goes well with the story so, good work!

The description was more or less okay, except there were some grammatical errors. I feel the structuring of it could have been way better.

First Chapter

The first chapter was good. You really did a good job in it. At the end of the chapter, I really was drawed in to move on to the next chapter. The short peek in Emily's life was pleasant to read.

Character Development

The character development was damn nice. The transition of rude Ethan to cute Ethan was gradual and believable. Ethan and Emily, I ship them! Everyday Emily walked in the RC, I looked forward to their conversations. The little love triangle you showed between Noah, Emily and Ethan enhanced the story. Emily's dad was the villain I pictured in my head. Emily's character was both soft and strong. Really well portrayed.

Plot and Storyline

Plot glided really well throughout. Once I started reading it, I couldn't help but read all of it. The sweet bickerings of Ethan and Emily, the flirting of Noah, the friendship of Emily and Natalie, and finally Emily's dad. All the angles of the story were given proper justice. I didn't find any plot holes as of now.

Grammar and Detailing

Grammar is where you lacked. There were a lot of grammatical errors. The punctuations, mainly the comma was either wrongly used or not used at all. Sometimes the dialogue quotation was not done, sometimes you forgot to use some key words which changed the whole meaning of the sentence. You shifted tense a lot of times, please don't write in present tense, stories are not supposed to be that way. Minor typos were everywhere. I advice you to edit your chapters and take good care of grammar henceforth.

Detailing was pretty good. You really did detail the characters, the setting, the dialogues, the dresses worn. Something I really liked. You know, your chapters were short but you managed to get all the details in without making it look like you rushed through the story, you took it slow and steady.

Overall Rating

3