Author: _lola15_

The Review

Cover, Title and Description

The cover is simple, too simple for that matter. Like there's a blue rose which I can just guess is trying to point towards the female protagonist. It's just too plain, doesn't draw you in. The fonts are too basic and are placed awkwardly. Your username is too big.

Title is pretty apt. I haven't read much but I could guess that Lev will be protecting Blue from his father, hence, the title.

Description was at par. I didn't like the first paragraph though. In that two sentence paragraph, you used "me" five times. If you use it so many times, the only thing that's gonna register in your readers' minds is "me". The rest of the blurb was nice, I liked that you first wrote a small scene from your book and then provided a summary too. There were slight grammatical errors, mainly concerning commas. Other than that, the blurb was alright.

First Chapter

There was a fair amount of information in the first chapter about Blue. Her past, the money she owed. However, I couldn't understand what you meant by, "There's just one difference between my stepsister and rain. Belle's anger can last for just 2 days non stop but the rain, don't get me wrong the rain can also last for 2 days non stop but it hardly does." Firstly, there's some grammatical mistakes in there, secondly, what is the difference you tried to convey?

Character Development

Not much in the first five chapters, the characters have just been introduced. But the flow of it is nice. Lev is kind of rude, Blue is emotional. Zach is fun. A nice package of characters with different personalities.

Plot and Storyline

The plot flow is damn good. Short chapters with steady growth. But I don't know why this book is in the Teen Fiction genre whereas it is New Adult. Nevertheless, I liked the story as far as I read it. I couldn't find any plot hole as of now. The storyline was definitely a bit different from other teen fiction books because it doesn't really belong to teen fiction. No brat and nerd for a change.

Grammar and Detailing

The grammar is where I felt you lacked. Usage of full stops and commas was very less. There were many typos. Sometimes you left dialogues without any appropriate punctuation. There's slight tense shift here and there.

Detailing of characters, mainly Lev was done well when Blue bumped into him from her point of view. Other than that, you could have detailed Kai and Dray too. Their built and all. Another advice I would like to give you is to describe things after a dialogue is delivered. Don't just leave dialogues without any expression of how it was told. Humans are humans, not robots. They have different tones at different occasions. You need to describe that. Describe what Lev was doing while talking to Blue or what kind of tone he used, did they have eye-contact or was he looking at his laptop. Small things matter.

Overall Rating

3