Dragon Soul

By Phoenix-Dragoness

I apologize for this incredibly overdue review.

You have built quite an impressive world, and I can tell that you are very well versed in the fantasy genre. I was so impressed with the incredible depth and history of the realm you created, and I was also impressed with the map you built at the beginning of the story. From Aeris to Teriah to Pyrisa, you truly fleshed out a fantasy world here that feels real, ancient, and complex, with a magic system that is as intricate as the characters themselves.

I was enraptured by your plot in addition to the phenomenal worldbuilding. Ignatius' training and competing in the ring against other young students becomes a fascinating vehicle for showing the world you built to the reader. Ignatius is an interesting character from the beginning. He's the son of a powerful man, and has to fill some really big shoes. As the reader, you really sympathize with him, because he has to learn how to live up to massive expectations that are seemingly out of reach. Lots of readers will relate to Ignatius' conflicts as a character, and I thought that the work you did with him was very strong.

I also really enjoyed the creatures you created for this story. They reminded me of the creatures from Percy Jackson in a way, along with the characters who have to fight them. This story, overall, felt like a really interesting take on Percy Jackson, but instead it is set in a traditional fantasy world.

Sometimes I felt as if your exposition really dragged down the pacing. You pause the story quite a lot to give exposition. I understand that it is really difficult to communicate all the histories and complexities of this world you built without having to pause the story and info dump, but I think you could stand to leave a lot more of the story up to subtext, and trust that the reader is intelligent enough to keep up.

This is quite a dense story and it has a lot to offer. Sometimes the story is a bit episodic, from the chapters about Ignatius proving himself in combat to his father, to his search for the Pyrisian Taurus herd. Some readers might prefer something a little more linear, but I still enjoyed the change of pace from chapter to chapter.

You are quite a talented young fantasy author. I know that if you keep writing and practicing in this genre, you could very well be the next G.R.R.M.

Best,

Rowan.