Before you begin, please read chapter 1 of this book titled 'Welcome', if you haven't done so already. Then, you can come back and read the reviews.

Book name: The Beauty of Mist, the Beast of Dawn: A Loose Retelling of Beauty and the Beast
Written by: kNGT_fringed_gentian
Judged by: Jash_Parikh

Hi, there! Let's start your review in a specific order...

Cover: It is creative, interesting, and seems perfect for the context. I love the elegance of the design. For this, you get 1/1.

Title: Unique and catchy but grammatically incorrect unless you are trying to personify Mist as a living being. Otherwise, it should be Beauty of The Mist, The Beast of Dawn. I understand it makes sense to have this title, but maybe you could have come up with something shorter. A title that isn't even fully visible on my laptop screen is not the best of the lot. But it's a good title, not worth too much scrutiny. For this, you get 0.9/1.

Description: Your description does contain the summary of your book, but it simply isn't hooking enough to make us go "Deffo need to check this one out". You're banking too much on the uniqueness of your plot to pull readers. Instead, give glimpses of the twists you have in store for them, use prose that piques interests (something even as simple as the "What could go wrong" line you have in your cover") would suffice. Maybe give glimpses of your writing prowess by quoting some great comical/thought-provoking or amazing dialogues from your characters - that is usually a great way to hook readers.

All in all, what you have is not at all bad, it's decent but far too inadequate. Consider adding at least one or more of my suggestions. For this, you get 0.55/1.

Beginning, Plot, Grammar: I absolutely love your prologue. I love your plot, it is not very original but you inform us beforehand that it is a loose retelling of a classic, so we know what to expect. I did notice some minor grammar mistakes, mostly I am guessing you missed conjunction or two here and there, probably just typos.

Also, the change in tenses is confusing at times. Like, you make your narration sound as if it is happening in the present tense, but then you follow dialogues with "had said" as if the narrator is narrating a story of the past. As I read more your intention of past tense becomes clear, but the random places of present tense throw me off. Let me find a very simple example in the prologue itself to give. Here you go: "Before Queen Dalilah had died, though, she gave her final command." It seems like you use 'had' in places where it is not at all needed. Are you having trouble with the difference between past continuous and simple past tenses? I think that might be it. This is especially prominent in times when you use dialogues. It is rare or almost not present when it is a monologue or you are describing the settings.

What I loved most about your writing was, well, apart from the one teensy thing I pointed up above, everything. Your way of writing left me spellbound and wanting for more. Your ability to describe the settings and the situations is amazing. The tenses still throw me off at least once in each chapter, like even as far as chapter 6, there is a line, "The royal herald, who had continued instructing those in line, stopped abruptly." This should be "The Royal Herald, who was continually/continuously instructing those in line, stopped abruptly" or "The Royal Herald, who had been continually/continuously instructing those in line, stopped abruptly".

I see that despite this being a retelling, your own imagination is prevalent. The plot does tend to flow along expected lines at times and rarely gives cliffhangers, which is one thing maybe you could implement. All in all, this is a fantastic read and I'm glad I came across it. It's okay, your ability as a writer is great and I can see great potential in you, so I won't deduct marks for this aspect just yet.

For this part, you get 1.95/2.

Your total score: 4.4/5.

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