Once I got back to the Doghouse, I found Danny tossing a baseball against a wall. He always did this the days leading up to a game; it didn't help that the Megaton Binominals were going up against their rivals the Randville Gladiators. So far the Binominals have only won one game against the Gladiators and that was because the Gladiators passed out from laughter and had to forfeit.

With each toss Danny mumbled some play. I found Brain mumbling in his lab, but his incoherent whispers involved mathematics and chemical reactions.

Bandit, my white and brown mixed dog, sat on the couch watching the news. Sally was on at the moment. "Today," she said, "construction has begun on the lot of the old White Anti-Virus branch office. The unknown buyer has yet to reveal what will be built there. The previous owner, Matt White, better known as the mad scientist Glue, was one of Dogboy's most dangerous foes."

Old video from various battles with Glue appeared over Sally's shoulder. "White's knowledge of chemistry and computer science, along with his unpredictable and aggressive personality, made for a dangerous combination."

The super-battle highlight video was replaced by a full-screen security feed from White's office. It showed White sitting at his holographic computer. Suddenly, he was blasted by a bolt of electricity from the machine. He flew through the air, landed in some kind of substance, and in seconds was completely covered in the strange, white gunk.

The video ended and Sally reappeared. "After being injured during an accident involving his own experiment, White became living glue." What really happened is that Terabyte, a villain that could control digital technology, tried to eliminate Matt and me. That blast of energy was actually Terabyte attacking Matt White.

Sally continued as more video of Glue and my battles appeared over her shoulder. "Dogboy and Glue fought many times, but Dogboy always trumpeted over the villain's glue themed plots.

"White's business failed soon after his criminal activities were exposed, and he is assumed killed during the Dark Matter War," Sally continued. "Glue's mega glue bomb was instrumental in the destruction of the Xacian mother ship which prompted the final battle between Jackal and Dogboy."

I sat next to Bandit and groaned softly.

What's up? he asked in Dog.

"Just a bit bothered by this Cruise X thing. The culprit hacked into the system. They were smart enough to get passed Brain's defenses, but I was able to undo the damage easily."

You're complaining about something being easy?

"It was too easy. There should have been more resistance...That is if sabotaging the ship had been their true goal."

Bandit used his hind leg to scratch at his ear. So they were up to something else? But what?

"I don't know." I sighed and rubbed the temples of my head. "The worst part is the hack seemed familiar. As in Matt White familiar."

Bandit shook out his fur and then snorted. But Glue's dead.

"We thought my powers were gone forever. And how many times did we blow up, fry, flush, and trap Glue only for him to return?"

You saw it with your own eyes. Jackal vaporized him.

I stroked my chin. I was going to need a shave soon. "I guess so. But there is still Glue's 'daughter,' Stickyfingers. I wonder just how much he taught her."

Before his death, Glue "adopted" a young woman off the streets. Her parents abandoned her; and in order to survive the streets, she became a pickpocket. One day, she picked the wrong pocket (or right depending on how you look at it); she ran into Glue.

Even though she is about his age, he still refers to her as his daughter—mainly because he used her in an experiment to "pass on" his powers to another. If he succeeded he'd be able to create an army of glue soldiers. Obviously, the plot worked and Stickyfingers gained a similar set of powers. I don't know why he never finished his glue army plot. According to Stickyfingers, he had plenty of time to pull it off before that fateful battle.

I made a futile attempt at digging deeper into the couch. Something about this Cruise X situation rubbed me the wrong way.

BOOM!

The Doghouse rattled and the smell of burnt chemicals and maybe fried hair filled the secret base.

Brain poked his head out of his lab; he slipped out, and shut the door behind him. "I will return momentarily. I just require something from my lab at PAWS. Do not enter the laboratory under any circumstances. And if you happen to hear unholy whispering or images of a demonic squid being flash through your mind, just ignore it. I will not be long." He walked calmly to the exit at first than took off full tilt out the door.

It took Danny all of two seconds before sneaking a peak. "Uh, Joe, you might want to see this."

I joined Danny at the door to Brain's lab, with Bandit at my heels. Inside was some kind of portal. It had a blackish frame with a strange language written on it. The portal itself opened to some kind of formless cosmic being. Its red tendrils were already coming through. It also seemed to be in the middle of eating some souls. If you squinted and tilted your head, you might've gotten a glimpse of a humanoid figure with squid tentacles for a beard. 

I sighed and put my hands on my hips. "What have I said to Brain?"

Danny and Bandit both said, "If you're going to summon ancient cosmic gods, do it at your own lab."

My kingdom rises, the red-eyed beast proclaimed. The water won't stop me forever. The call goes out and many will serve. Then the Earth shall return to me.

"Yeah, huh-uh," I said. "I've heard it all before, buddy."

You cannot stop me. I am a god. I have existed since before the birth of this universe. I will exist long after its demise.

I turned to Danny. "Get the tarter sauce."

The demon-squid's eyes widened for a second and the tendrils retracted for a moment. You think you can devour me. I am beyond you. You do not have the stomach for it.

"Buster, I'm part dog. My stomach is bottomless." I pulled a bib from my pocket and snapped it. "And I've been on a diet."

The beast of that place I can't spell yelled out a hissing scream. The tendrils slipped back into the portal. You think you've won, but it is only a matter of time before my kingdom rises and I ravage the Earth.

"Tell it to a horror author," I said with a wave. "This is a PG book."

The portal then closed.

"That was amazing!" said Danny.

"Eh. You just got to show those ancient cosmic gods whose boss." I took a quick glance around the lab. It was a mess. Ancient god-like beings can be so rude; smashing everything insight as they slitter through portals. "We better go though. Brain will be back soon and I don't want to be here when he does."

Danny rubbed the back of his neck. "Good point. Cosmic squid beings I can handle; a ticked off Brain...That guy can be vicious. Besides, I got to get to practice." He tried to look chipper; but being part dog, I could "smell" his fear. "Tomorrow night's the bloodbath." Not sure whose bloodbath it was going to be. "You coming?"

"Wild centaurs couldn't keep me away. No matter how many times they try to abduct fans going into the stadium."