"You're not a bad person. You're a very good person who bad things have happened to. Besides, the world isn't split into good people and [bad people]. We've all got both Light and Dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are."
—Sirius Black, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

There is Darkness. And there is Light. That much had always been clear to be.

My vision became a haze, focusing on nothing in particular. I heard only the melody of the Dark Side and my own heart beat in tune with the hum of my lightsabers. I felt only the hilt in my hand.

It was as if I was being controlled by a Force far greater than me. I remember feeling wild and uncontrolled, but it was welcoming.

How I had longed to reach deep inside myself, to let that side of me show.

I do not remember the trip to Geonosis. I do not remember jumping from the ship. I do not remember the hoards of clone troopers joining us.

I only remember my eyes feeling like fire as they burned red with rage and the immense hatred I felt for these hideous creatures for what they did to my family.

The world moved slowly as I cut down the next abomination. I felt its agony, but it only added fuel to my flames.

I exterminated beast after beast, inflicting pain and suffering that I shamefully enjoyed.

Reflecting upon it, I admit that I was a beast myself. I was simply a weapon of mass destruction sent to wipe out an enemy.

Then I heard a forceful interruption, like a tear in a tightly fabricated dream. It was weak, but it was enough.

I pushed away the thoughts and wants of the Dark Side, refusing to be it's conduit any longer. I looked up just in time to see my brother catch me as I fell, exhausted.

And in excruciating pain.

In my drunken, power-mongering state, I hadn't noticed the Jedi that had targeted me as an enemy. I had not killed them, but I had dealt some serious blows, but not before they got their licks in.

My shoulder glowed white hot from a burn, as did my thigh. A few small cuts would scar across my arms, but perhaps the worst of it was the blow to my neck that was meant to be fatal.

Betwixt the pain of killing others, and I indeed felt their pain, I had ignored my own.

I was dying; that much was obvious.

For what might have been the last time, I looked into the starkly cold eyes of my brother. His eyes were torn by circumstances that he didn't fully understand.

But I knew what I needed to do.

Clutching desperately at the gaping wound on throat, I managed to whimper a small word: "Go."

And I prayed profusely, singing our shared song with the Force in my head, hoping that he would hear it and understand. In the few seconds I had, I needed to convey a short message.

His lips moved, but I couldn't hear any sounds. I didn't understand. I just hoped that he did.

I felt blissfully unaware of my surroundings.

Then, not for the first or last time, I died.

----------------------------

I floated through the empty eternity of the Cosmic Force, happy. It was if I had never begun and would never end. I had always been here, and I would never leave.

I was infinite.

A beautiful woman stood before me, commanding much power, but also much kindness. In her I sensed no Darkness and no Light, just the Force.

"You are a long way from home, Skywalker." She concluded.

I had no idea what she was talking about. I had always been here. I found myself unable to speak.

"Walk with me." She ordered as if we were two old friends about to have tea and go through a stroll in the garden.

There was something oddly familiar about her, a presence she reminded me of.

I found myself in a forest. It was like a dream where settings sporadically changed, though I did not realize it. It only seemed natural.

The woman had changed a bit as well. Her clothes were noticeably different and she seemed to float above me instead of walk.

She turned to face me. Even with my newfound eternality, I suddenly felt small. "I want to apologize." Her voice echoed throughout the Force. "But killing you was the only way to speak with you."

I suddenly found my tongue. "You killed me?" I was more confused than angry. After all, I had been there forever. I had never died.

But it made uncanny sense.

"I truly am sorry." The figure sounded sincere. "But Master Billaba won't remember a thing. I possessed her body momentarily in an attempt to smite you. I have encountered few with your level of ability. I would not want you as an enemy."

"Who are you?" I asked.

She gave a pleasant smile. "My name is Shy-Lee Ordaan. I knew Master Thraina many millennia ago."

I nodded, understanding. "I've heard Master Thraina speak of you."

Master Shy-Lee gave an amused chuckle. "I love her very much." For a moment, she did not look powerful at all. Instead, she seemed to long for something.

"Now," she continued. "I must give you a message before I return you to the Living Force."

This surprised me. "I can go back?"

A look of utter sincerity flashed on her features. "Of course. I have no use in killing you now. Things have only just begun for you, little Skywalker."

I did not understand. Perhaps I still do not.

"You must be aware of the situation," Shy-Lee stated. "Do not fear the imbalance. Nothing is perfect, and the Force is no exception. Instead, live and breathe the very power you possess. Let it engulf you and fill you."

My eyes blinked several times. "I'm not following."

She seemed not to heed me. "Do not trust anything with great fluctuation, not even yourself."

Shy-Lee looked at me like I was a newly orphaned child. I knew that I would not like whatever she said next. "Above all, do not attach yourself to trivial things. After your story is complete, not even the immortals will exist forever."

There was an eerie silence, quieter than anything could be in the Living Force.

Then a sound like a water droplet filled every crevice and crack it could find. It was alarming, but it brought me back to reality.

Shy-Lee disappeared in a wave of mist, as did the garden and all my surroundings.

I was in a sea of stars.

Their music overwhelmed me. My head filled, threatening to burst with the pain. The different beats seemed to pierce through my mind.

And then human suffering came back to me.

My arms opened up where I had been burned only moments ago. My shoulder dropped and my leg threatened to give way. I found breathing difficult as my neck ripped open.

But I was conscious enough to watch the blue lightning streak down my arms, calves, torso, throat, like I was seeing myself from someone else's point of view. I had never been so grateful to see those hideous reminders.

One melody lifted itself over all the others. My song. Anakin's song. I recognized it as clearly as I could recognize a face or a landmark.

It was more beautiful than I had ever heard it.

I reached out to grab it, overcome though I was with physical and mental agony.

I felt myself falling for what seemed like forever.

Then I felt my physical body.

And my mind saw no more.

[A/N]:

Guess who had a random burst of inspiration???

This girl!

I really want to continue the adventures of my favorite OC of all time, but I have been more busy this summer than every summer leading up to this combined.

I hope everyone is doing well and enjoying their summer break.

This is a bit of a spiritual chapter, but there are some ideas that I want to get across.

First of all, I want to show just how in turn the Dark Jedi are with the Force. Because they can use both sides of the Force, they don't have to rely on only half of the aspects. There are certain powers that come with the Dark and Light Sides, but Arrai gets them both!

Second, I want to show just how powerful Arrai really is. I know that none of you know the story of my two OCs Thraina and Shy-Lee (That story has never been published), but they are in the top five most powerful people in this version of the Star Wars Universe. Keep in mind that EU characters are usually canon in my timeline.

Thirdly, since I'm a bit of a sadist, I like trying to break my characters to see where they come out. I am a better writer than I was when I first wrote this series. I am planning on showing the pain and suffering and literally hell that my characters endure. I have big things in store, and not just for Arrai.

Last, but most certainly not least, I am introducing the significant other to my favorite lesbian OC. Since it might be a while before I write a prequel Old Republic series, I want to just tell you have massively in love Thraina and Shy-Lee are. They are married in this universe, though Shy-Lee is obviously dead. They never had any children, but they were supposed to. Those two have a long, tragic backstory that I would LOVE to write.

I love you all and I hope you have a great rest of the week.

Peace, love, and
~Art