Tracy

Slowly Mark held me and we swayed under the darkened dance floor. The dress I had chosen to wear was soft and felt flimsy against the warmth of his closeness. I wanted to stay in that moment with the steady beating of his heart against my ear but the song ended and he relaxed his hold on me. I didn't want to move but I managed to somehow.

"Thanks," I murmured feeling like my senses were still wrapped up in his hold and I was still trying to detangle them. His expression was unreadable.

"It was my pleasure." The sound of his voice made a shiver race up my spine. His eyes stared into mine and I was lost. His eyes caught the glitter of the lights and they had never looked for striking.

"Um yes." I swallowed. My tongue felt tied. It didn't help that none of my thoughts were coherent and if I kept talking I would make less sense. It was best to get away before I made a fool of myself. He remained on the dance floor as I backed away before hurrying to my table.

I had an excuse of getting my camera and made a concerted effort to concentrate on taking more photos of my family as they dance, ate and drank. I loved to watch people and take photos. There was something magical about catching someone in the midst of an emotion when they had no idea it would be photographed. A snap shot of a moment in time.

I got a few more of my brother and Sarah. At first I had been more than skeptical of their budding relationship but despite all those misgivings I have never seen him so happy and content. The way Sarah looked at my brother showed that she was in love.

I sighed, studying the photo I had taken of them wistfully. Would I ever find someone I could love openly like that and have someone look at me that way as well?

After going through some of the photos I realised I hadn't gotten many of Sophie. I got my camera ready and scanned the dinner area but she wasn't on the dance floor or at the table. Where could she be?

Then I spotted her in the corner by the entrance talking to Mark. My hand shook with the camera while I watched them talk. Not everything was about me but I still felt uneasy while I kept my attention on them.

They didn't talk for too much longer before Sophie walked away. When her eyes met mine I knew their conversation had something to do with me. I knew her well enough to be able to read what she didn't say out around.

When she reached me we sat down and I pretended to show her some of the pictures while we talked.

"Mark knows there is something going on," Sophie murmured pointing at the picture on the screen.

Any hope I had hung onto that he was going to buy any of my lame lies went up in smoke.

"What did he say?" I asked, feeling irritated he wouldn't just leave it alone.

"He said he is worried about you and wanted to know from me if I knew of anything going on." I was annoyed that he was resorting to trying to pump my sister for information.

"What did you say?" I asked under my breath as we continued to pretend we were looking through the photos.

"I just told him that you were dealing with your breakup with Jack. You know the usual heartbreak stuff," she murmured.

"You didn't mention anything about the key and stuff?"

She shook her head.

I felt relieved but it would be short lived if Mark persisted. He wasn't someone to let something go once his curiosity had been peaked. I wasn't sure how to deter him. All I could hope was that I got the keys back from Jack and then no one had to know that he had been living with me.

My phone started to ring. My eyes met my sister's.

I checked my phone. "It's Jack."

Sophie nodded. I answered it. "Jack."

The line crackled. With the conversation and music I was struggling to hear him with the weak connection.

I stood and moved to outside away from the noise.

"Tracy...can...hear-" The line went dead.

There were no bars on my phone. I glared at my phone wishing I was in a better spot for cell phone coverage. Holding up my phone I tried to see if I could get a better signal. It might be better to try from my room.

I let out a frustrated sigh before returning inside to my seat beside my sister.

"And?"

"The line was so bad I couldn't hear anything and then I lost signal." I was beyond frustrated that I couldn't talk to Jack to sort out the misunderstanding.

I propped my head up with my hand and I found myself watching Mark. He stood talking to Matthew and Sarah. I stared unable to look away. There was something hypnotic about his mannerism from the way he listened intently and how he smiled engagingly. His eyes were always sharp taking in his surroundings, it was an inbuilt instinct from his job.

He lifted his glass to swallow a mouthful of his drink and I couldn't stop gazing at him.

"Tell me something," Sophie interrupted me.

I straightened up, aware that I had let my guard down around my sister.

"You and Mark?" she asked softly.

"What about me and Mark?" I looked her straight in the eyes.

"There just seems to be... something there."

Someone was bound to figure it out at some point. I was surprised it had taken this long.

"Since high school," I sighed. I was usually quite open with my sister but for some reason I had never told her how I felt about Mark.

I remembered back to when it had first begun. There had been an initial flutter of butterflies in my stomach the first time I met him when Matthew had brought him home the first week they had started high school but it was only a couple of years later when I started the same high school that my feelings had progressed from physical to something more.

I had expected Matthew my older brother to be protective but what had surprised me was how protective Mark had been as well. That plus catching in shirtless a few times working out had been enough for me to look at him differently. The same way I looked at him now.

"Is it that obvious?" I mumbled, feeling deflated.

"A little." I wasn't sure I wanted her honestly. If she had noticed, had others?

"You guys are always bickering," she shrugged and I frowned.

"We don't."

She tried to suppress a smile. "Yes you do. Honestly you fight like a married couple."

"Do you think anyone else noticed?" I questioned further not sure I wanted the answer.

"I'm sure there are few people that suspect something but no one knows anything for sure," she explained. "Or at least no one has said anything to me."

"There's nothing really to talk about anyway." I shrugged.

"I'm surprised you guys haven't gotten it on yet." Her bold statement took me by surprised. I had never been brave enough to act on my feelings for him, I had resigned myself to watching from afar.

"Why would you think that?"

"There is chemistry there. If you look close enough you can see it. He never argues with anyone like he does with you."

I thought about what she was saying but I couldn't believe it.

"So you think...you think he is attracted... to me?" I asked, feeling more confused by the moment.

She nodded with a knowing smile. I sat back.

She could be wrong. But what if she wasn't? No I refused to entertain it. I didn't want to build myself up with hope only for it to be dashed.

"No I think you're seeing something that isn't there," I disagreed.

She lifted a shoulder and dropped it. "We'll see."

I shook my head again still unable to accept what she was telling me.

"Matt is headed in our direction," Sophie mumbled and I looked up to see our brother striding to us.

He didn't look mad but I wasn't sure that he hadn't found out what I had been trying so hard to hide. Was it possible he knew?

I felt the childish urge to run so I wouldn't have to face up to my actions and his lecture but I reminded myself I didn't have to answer to anyone. Even if I made mistakes, I was the one who had to live with them.