Six

            I don’t think.

            In fact, if I took the moment to think, Cole and I would both be dead within seconds. I don’t waste any time as I raise the shotgun, pointing the barrel at the closest zombie crouching down to devour Cole and pull the trigger.

            A deafening boom sounds and then the zombie crumples to the ground, the shot getting it in the neck. With another shot left, I take the next closest monster while Cole starts crawling back and taking out his gun. As I rush towards Cole, Bullet whips towards one of the few left in the group and leaps for it, tearing off a chunk of its shoulder. He instantly spits it out and moves for another jump, the zombie too slow to even reach to bite the canine.

            I help Cole to his feet and whistle for Bullet to retreat to us. He does as he’s told and we start to jog backwards towards the doors, slowing to take shots. We’re there when we see it’s pointless. More zombies heard the noise and are slowly staggering out of alleyways and open doors in homes, looking for the human flesh to eat.

            Cole runs through the doors as someone throws them open, Bullet on his tail. But I pause, unable to believe the amount of mindless, dead people moving towards us. How can this happen? How can so many human beings be turned into corpses, hungering for blood and skin to keep them alive?

            “Come on,” Jagger says behind me. His voice makes it sound casual as he grabs the back of my jacket and yanks me inside, letting the double doors bang shut in front of me. In seconds, there’s banging on the doors from the monsters trying to get in. Jack and Emily drag things like desks and chairs to barricade the door but I don’t get to help as Jagger continues to drag me out of the room.

            He brings me to the girl’s bathroom and this time he holds the door open for Bullet, too. When we’re inside, he grabs my wrist and holds it up, moving it back and forth in the fading light to look at my cut.

            “How did this happen? Did you get bitten?” His voice is angry and full of concern at the same time. I shake my head no and he turns on the sink, thrusting my palm underneath the freezing water. I wince as he starts to scrub the cut, removing tiny pieces of glass.

            “I cut it going through the front window,” I whisper, staring at the side of Jagger’s face so I don’t have to feel the pain.

            “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

☣

            “This is crazy.” Jack shakes his head in disbelief as we peek out of one of the now barricaded windows. Hordes of zombies are lurking outside, all looking for a way inside. It’s impossible to count how many there are and I can’t help but wonder if we’re going to die in here or the dead will get us first.

            “It’s Sloane’s fault,” Cole snaps, angrily jerking away from the window. Everyone stares at him and then me. We recapped what happened but didn’t get very far before we heard the banging on every entrance and glass window. “I told you she’s going to be the death of us!”

            “She saved your life, Cole,” Jagger says, his voice low but threatening. “If it wasn’t for her, you would be dead.”

            “If anyone of us went out there with you instead, we still would have had to shoot them. We still would have been followed back.” Everyone turns to Emily, who spoke so quietly it almost seemed unreal. She shrugs, as if defending me is something she does every day. “It’s true.”

            “She’s right,” Jack agrees. Cole turns to him, his hands balled into fists and Jack shrinks away behind Emily, scared of him.

            “How are we going to get the Fort Saunders now?” Cole meets everyone’s eyes except mine, his tone harsh. “Explain to me, how we’re going to survive long enough to kill all the zombies and make our way there.” When no one answers him, he turns to me. His jaw is clenched so tight I can almost hear his teeth breaking. “Why don’t you tell us, Sloane? Since it is your fault for getting us into this mess!”

            “Stop going on about it,” Jagger snaps, rising to his feet from the bench he’s been sitting on. “It’s not her fault.”

            “If she never came here, this would have never happened,” Cole objects. Everyone is silent. I guess saving someone’s life doesn’t get you in their good books, no matter what you did.

            No one dares look up from the floor until I realize they’re waiting on me to say something. The only person who isn’t looking down is Cole. Instead, he’s glaring at me so intently I want to turn away.

            “We could create a distraction,” I suggest, my voice barely audible.

            Cole snarls. “What?”

            “We could create a distraction,” I repeat, slightly louder. “Something to lure the zombies away. Maybe we can create a noise in the back field so they think humans are there, and we can run out of the front.”

            Jack’s head snaps up and he’s grinning. “Sloane! You’re a genius!” He closes the distance between us and holds his hand up in the air, waiting for me to return his high five. Slowly, I gently tap my palm to his. “That kind of sucked.”

            “Well, how the hell are we going to do that?” Cole asks.

            Jagger shakes his head back and forth as he folds his arms across his chest. “We have an idea, Cole. Just lay off her while she and the rest of us figure it out. We don’t have to leave immediately. We have time to think about this.”

            Cole throws his hands in the air, frustrated. “Fine, whatever.” He stalks off and once he’s gone, it feels like everyone can breathe again. Everyone disperses and then the only one left are Bullet and I.

            “You’re a good boy,” I murmur, scratching behind his ear. “I don’t know how, but you know how to kick ass when it comes to zombie fighting.” He starts panting, making it look like he’s smiling.

            “So do you.”   

            I spin around and find Jagger leaning against the wall. I thought he left, but I had been wrong. I don’t know what to say so I shrug and turn my eyes back to Bullet.

            “Don’t take what Cole said personally, Sloane. He’s had anger issues for a while. It’s nothing against you; he’s just picked you because you’re easier to blame for everything than himself.”

            “It’s fine.” It’s not, because Cole seriously scares me. But for now I’ll pretend that I really am okay with saving his life and not getting a thank you.

            “Walk with me back to the teacher’s lounge? It’s getting dark out.” He gives me a small smile and I return it.

            “I think I just need a minute to myself. Today’s been kind of…” I trail off, searching for a fitting word.

            “Rough?” Jagger asks, trying to fill in the blank.

            I shrug. “I guess. But I was looking more for something like confusing.” He gives me a questioning glance but I don’t explain what I mean. He doesn’t need to know about the visions I’m having about my memory. Maybe I’ll tell him in the future, but now, I want to keep them locked away until I can put together the pieces.

            Once he’s gone I stay by myself for only a few minutes. I look out the small window in the hall, only able to see out of a small triangle between the boards nailed to the walls. Cole and Jack found them in the shop classroom and used all they have for the windows.

            I head back to the teacher’s lounge as slowly as possible. I’m almost there when I hear something, a sound I’m not familiar with. It sounds almost like when Bullet whimpers, but I’m not sure. Bullet perks his ears up as we close in on the sound. It leads us to the boy’s bathroom.

            I don’t think to knock. So instead, I open the door silently and tip toe in. When I round the corner, my heart sinks and I wish I never followed the sound. It’s almost like the feeling when you find your birthday present before your birthday, and despite how excited you were to find it, now you wish you never found it.

            Jack sits on the floor of the bathroom, hugging his knees. He’s leaning against the white wall with his head resting on the tops of his knees while he cries. I can tell he’s trying to be quiet but he’s sobbing so much that I don’t know how I’m the first or only one to find him.

            He’s younger than me, maybe by a year or two. But now he looks so little; like a child. I feel bad for him and my heart aches, for the first time since I woke up feeling sympathy. I’ve been going through this not upset, not scared, not anything. I can’t remember my life, my family or anything, so I don’t feel any emotions that normally I would. These kids, Jack, have to face the facts that everything they know is gone. Everything. And everyone.

            Finally Jack lifts his head and starts to wipe the tears from his wet cheeks. He’s running his blue sweater sleeve over them when he finally notices me and gasps. Quickly, he turns his head away, letting his hair fall over his eyes in attempt to stop me from seeing he’s crying.

            I don’t know how to comfort him or what to do. No memories come to mind so slowly, I step towards him and kneel on the cold tile in front of him.

            “I’m sorry.”

            It’s all I can say but it will never be enough. Bullet is quiet behind me, sitting guard for us. Jack still refuses to glance my way so I sink down beside him and lean my head back against the wall.

            I think me sitting here with him is all I can do to help. He goes back to his hugged-knee position and starts sobbing all over again into his jeans to a point where I don’t think he will ever stop. Ever since I came through the school doors, Jack seemed so innocent and happy, like everything was okay. He was holding himself together. But now I know he’s not okay at all. Maybe he breaks down a lot.

            I want to know his story but I don’t ask. I can only assume his parents, siblings and friends are all dead. He doesn’t talk; doesn’t tell me to leave. The silence between us isn’t uncomfortable. In fact, his crying creates some kind of hope inside me that this is really all happening. Everyone else is acting like things are fine, when they’re not. Maybe everyone else gets upset by themselves too.

            “You won’t tell, will you?”

            As soon as he speaks I have to turn to him to make sure he actually spoke. I lost track of time in my thoughts and when I look at him, there’s no tears. In fact, he looks like he’s fine except for a bit of redness to his eyes and cheeks.

            I shake my head no. He smiles sadly and leans his head against the wall, copying me.

            “What’s it like, not remembering anything?”

            I shrug, unsure of what to say. “It feels normal, because I can’t remember it being any other way.”

            “Do you want to tell me what I know about you?”

            My eyes flicker to his, full of curiosity. “You know things about me?”

            He nods and breaks eye-contact, moving his gaze to the tiled ceiling. “You went to this high school. To be honest, not everyone is telling you what they know about you. They didn’t know who you were at first, because you showed up a bit of a mess. But they all know you, Sloane. Even I do.”

            I can’t believe what I’m hearing. “Tell me what you know.”

            “You’re in your last year of high school. Well, you were going to be. I didn’t know you personally but everyone knew who you were. You were the popular girl; the girl everybody was friends with because you were so nice. But then things changed.” He closes his eyes and I don’t know if it’s because he’s remembering or tired.

            “Changed how?” I can’t imagine being the popular girl. Everyone here hates me and isn’t telling me the truth.

            Jack’s eyes open and he turns his head to look at me. His expression is full of sympathy. “You became the girl whose dad left.” The memory was true. “Nobody knew for sure what happened, but he left and you changed into someone so cold being in the same hall as you made everyone leave. You refused to talk to anyone, even teachers and were labeled mute until the day you screamed in Math class.”

            I blink and the bathroom is a faded picture, like I’m looking through a see-through TV screen.

            “Sloane, can you tell us the answer?”

            I don’t know why Ms. Fox called on me. She hasn’t in the three months I never responded. But something in her eyes are challenging me, as if she doesn’t believe I don’t speak. But she’s right. I do speak; some times. Rare times. But she doesn’t deserve my words; no one does.

            “She’s not going to answer,” a girl snickers. My eyes snap to the right and I see its Emily, the dark-haired girl who never liked me. “She thinks she’s better than everyone else here.”

            She’s right. I do. Because I know the truth.

            “Sloane, answer the question on the board.”

            I’m not going to respond.

            “But she’s not better than us,” Emily continues. Ms. Fox keeps ignoring her, as if she’s not speaking. “She’s just a stuck up little bitch. You know how I know the truth?” Emily turns around in her seat and narrows her eyes at me. There’s a smirk plastered to her lips. “Do you, Sloane?”

            “If you do not answer the question, I am sending you to the principal’s office and you will get a zero for participation, Sloane.”

            A zero. I can’t get another one or Dad will be mad. But Dad’s gone, he won’t care. Or will he? Maybe it will bring him back.

            “Well, Sloane?” Emily asks. She’s grinning now. “I know because you’re daddy left you. He left you because you’re a stick up little bitch-“

            I don’t let her finish or hear Ms. Fox intervene. I do the only thing that will shut up my thoughts and the people around me.

            I scream.