"Every girl I've ever fucked, I always imagined they were you," Ryan said.

I could not get Ryan's words out of my head. They even seeped into my dreams, which I hated, especially since I would wake up next to Eric, feeling guilty for having another man in my dreams.

I didn't see Ryan the next morning at work. According to an email I received from him, he had an unexpected work trip to a construction site in Chicago and didn't know when he'd be back into the office.

For the rest of my first week, he only emailed me work information, restaurant receipts, and a few things to add to his calendar for him. Mrs. Turner confirmed that he had this trip planned before I started working there, but part of me felt that she was really trying to cover for him..

On the Tuesday of my third week there, I was coming back from having lunch with Peggy and Ashlee when I saw Ryan. I almost didn't believe my own eyes. I saw him for only a moment before he stepped into his office and closed the door. I sat down at my desk, wondering if I should go to his office and welcome him back.

I battled with my thoughts for a while, then convinced myself to do it. What was the worst that could happen? I had already seen him getting a blowjob in there and hearing him having sex with a girl in a public bathroom. There was absolutely nothing more that could surprise me.

I approached his closed door and raised my hand to knock at the exact same moment he decided to open it. We were inches apart. His majestic eyes locked with mine. I didn't realize that my hand was still in the door-knock position. Before I realized what was happening, he clasped his strong hand around my raised wrist and pulled me into his office, shut the door, and pinned me up against it.

His lips met mine. He kissed me deeply, and I, without much thought, kissed him back. It was as if it was a natural thing between us. His one hand still had my raised hand pinned to the door, but his other hand found the hem of my black, pencil skirt, and he inched his fingers under it and moved his digits up my outer thigh until it cupped my ass. As he pulled my body into his, I could feel his penis harden against me.

*buzz*buzz*

Ryan ignored the sound and kept kissing me.

*buzz*buzz*

Ryan's cellphone continued vibrating on his desk.

"You should probably get that," I panted, as I snapped back to reality. Realizing that I shouldn't be doing what I am doing with anyone else but Eric. Ryan looked at me, read my expression, and instantly released me. He went over to his phone. As he answered it, I fixed myself as quickly as I could, left his office, and went back to my desk.

Ryan didn't come out of his office for the rest of the afternoon. Which was fine by me. I was feeling guilty for even responding to his advances. Should I tell Eric? Maybe I should run it by Sasha first and get her input. She was always helpful with these types of situations back in college.

I was grateful to see the end of the day come. I went to the elevator without looking back at Ryan's door and pressed the down button. Moments later, the elevator pinged and opened. I stepped in and pushed the ground floor button. As the doors started to close, Ryan stepped in, causing the doors to open again.

I kept my eyes on Ryan as the doors shut again. From his profile, he looked thoughtful in his stare at the closed elevator doors.

"I want to apologize to you," Ryan said calmly. He barely glanced over at me, and I just nodded for him to continue. "I'm sorry for forcing myself on you like that. I don't know what came over me. I'm not normally like that. Especially with women dating my friends."

"We're engaged," I clarified.

"Whatever," Ryan shrugged. "Either way, I just wanted you to know that it won't happen again."

I snorted slightly, annoyed by his words. "Can I ask you one thing?"

"What?"

"What did you mean when you said, 'I always imagined they were you'?"

Ryan looked at me, expressionless. "What are you talking about?"

"That night at the bar, when you were in the girls' bathroom, you said to me, 'Every girl I've ever fucked, I always imagined they were you.' What did you mean?" I said, making sure to emphasize the keywords so he would hear them as clearly as I did that night.

The elevator reached the ground floor and the doors dinged open. Ryan held his arm out across the threshold to allow me to step out first. Which I did.

"I have no idea what you're talking about. I was far from sober by the end of the night. Whatever I said to you, I wouldn't take too seriously or personally," he explained, as we walked through the lobby to the main entrance doors.

"That's a load of shit," I blurted, causing the security guard to give me a cockeyed look. "Sorry," I said and softened my voice.

"It's the truth," Ryan insisted, as we stepped outside to the crowded New York sidewalks. "Look, Ms. Ashcroft," Ryan turned to me, "believe me or don't. I don't care. I'm a happy bachelor, and I enjoy not having to report to someone. I also have a specific type, and I'm sorry to say that, while you are attractive, you are not it."

"Well, thank you for clarifying that misunderstanding," I said, feeling my ego getting slightly bruised, but doing my best not to show it. "Have a great night."

"Good night."

He and I turned and left work in different directions. I grabbed my cellphone out of my purse and called Sasha immediately. She insisted on meeting her for dinner at her apartment. Becca was making spaghetti.

*****

"Well, I think it's great that you're getting it out of your system before you and Eric tie the knot," Sasha said as she twirled her fork around her last bite of spaghetti.

"Did you get it out of your system before we tied the knot?" Becca snapped, clanking her fork down on her plate in shock at Sasha's words.

"I didn't need to, babe. I had all the fun throughout college. I knew what I wanted when I found you," Sasha said, picking up Becca's hand and giving it the sweetest kiss.

"I had my fair share of flings in college. I slept with several guys and a girl!" I said, winking at Sasha. "Plus, I love Eric, I just really don't know what came over me," I paused thoughtfully. "Of all the people in the world I can't believe Ryan and Eric were childhood friends. I wonder why Eric didn't mention that when I told him who I was going to work for?" I paused again with more thoughts running through my head. "Ah! This can seriously get even worse if Eric finds out someway that isn't from me, don't you think?"

"First off, slow down. I can't follow all of your thoughts. Second, the only other way Eric will find out is if Ryan says anything, right?" Sasha asked.

"Right."

"So you shouldn't have a problem. Unless you think Ryan will say something."

"I don't know if he'll say anything. I don't really know Ryan. I've only been working for the guy for three weeks, and the only real communication we've had has been via email and that night at the bar!" I rested my face in my hands at the realization that I really knew nothing about him and only really liked him for his looks.

"Well, you know Eric. How would he react to you telling him the truth?" Becca asked, chiming in.

"He'd be heartbroken. Angry. Then probably, if not most definitely, call off the engagement. Of course, it would be topped off with him kicking me out of his apartment. I'd be homeless!!" I said as tears starting welling up in my eyes for what seemed like the hundredth time during dinner.

"Vicky! C'mon! You know I am not his biggest fan, but give Eric a little more credit than that," Sasha demanded. "It's not like you went all the way with Ryan. You just had a mini-makeout session."

"Yeah, but it could have led to more," I argued.

"But it didn't, which is what really matters," Sasha paused and glanced at Becca. They were having a conversation with their eyes, I could tell. Sasha obviously won when she came back to my attention and said, "How about you sleep here tonight and think things over. Go back to Eric tomorrow. If you still feel the same way when you see him, then tell him."

"You don't mind if I crash here?" I asked, more so of Becca than Sasha.

Becca smiled a slightly defeated smile. "Of course not. You're family. Plus, it's only for tonight."

"Thank you," I said, relieved and accepted their offer.

Later that night, Becca had made the couch into a bed for me. She and Sasha said goodnight and went off to their bedroom, turning off the lights as they went. I laid on their very lumpy yet comfy couch. I watched mindless television until I was too tired to keep my eyes open. I switched it off and fell to sleep, trying my best to keep Eric and Ryan out of my dreams.

*****

The next morning Sasha gave me an outfit to wear to work. It was a black and white checkerboard printed slim dress that stopped just below my knees. It was nicely paired with a black blazer that closed at the bottom with one bronze button. Sasha always had great taste in clothes. I thanked her for the outfit as I slipped on my black pump heels that I wore the day before.

Finally ready, I gave Sasha and Becca goodbye-kisses on their cheeks and went to work. I still hadn't figured out what I wanted to do about telling Eric. I decided to see how the workday would go with Ryan before making a definite decision.

As I walked into the office building, my phone buzzed. It was a text from Eric.

ERIC: Hey babe. Missed you last night. I hope Sasha let you get some rest... Can you meet me for lunch today?

ME: I would love to. Pick me up at 12:30?

ERIC: I'll be there.

Seeing his last message made me instantly happy. I stepped off the elevator and walked to my desk. I started my usual morning routine. Including reviewing my emails, getting coffee, and chit-chatting with Mrs. Turner, Ashlee, and Peggy in the break-room for about fifteen minutes. When work was officially beginning, I was so focused on my work that I didn't notice Ryan approaching.

"Good morning, Ms. Ashcroft," he greeted pleasantly for the first time.

"Good morning, Mr. Herman," I responded, stunned. We made eye contact, and he actually smiled at me. What the heck, Mr. Herman? Why the hell are you looking at me like that?

"Any messages for me?" He asked, opening his office door and stepping in. He didn't even wait for me to respond. Was I suppose to follow him into his office? Then he popped his head back out, looking at me, waiting for a response.

"A few," I said calmly, trying to assess his new body language and facial expressions.

"Well, come into my office, and we can go over them," he said, disappearing behind the wall.

Was this another ploy to get me alone in his office again? I knew I'd have to get used to being in his office if I was going to remain his assistant. I gathered my notes and a mechanical pencil before I went in.

Ryan was sitting at his desk, typing away at his computer. He paused, looked at me, and gestured for me to sit in the chair across from him. "Let's hear what you got."

I looked down at my notepad and went over my checklist. I relayed his messages from various callers. Then I continued to go over the day's scheduled meetings, what was needed for those meetings from him and what I had done so far. The whole time we conversed, I was wondering if Ryan had been taken over by aliens as he was being unusually attentive and responding so nicely.

The rest of the morning was fairly mundane. We attended our morning meetings, and he actually talked in my direction when addressing me. He was a completely different person. It also made me question whether I was reading too much into his character. But he did kiss me, that wasn't a dream. That did happen.

I had to admit, when he said, "Forget it ever happened," he did a great job at really following through on his words.