Flashback, 2011

Senior Year of High School

(19)

Is it just me or he's distancing himself from us lately?

Looking back to that night, Baekhyun spent his New Year with Chanyeol, watching the fireworks and welcoming the brand new year together. Before it could happen though, he and Chanyeol had to sneak out and escape from Luhan, who out of the blue, had decided to join their friendship as their third friend. Whether Luhan had good intentions or not, the guy kept meddling in between them at every chance he could get much to Baekhyun's annoyance.

But now that classes are resumed, something surprises Baekhyun. Luhan, who seems to have a crush on Chanyeol, has now stopped hanging out with them at school. He actually thought Luhan would stick around until graduation but guess not. Is this Luhan finally learning his place?

Heh. Not that I'm happy or anything. It just feels weird...

"Did you just smile?"

"Huh? No, I didn't."

Baekhyun wipes off the grin forming on his face the moment Chanyeol catches him cackling to himself. His mood is shortly tainted by the sight of the person he was just thinking about. Luhan enters the bustling cafeteria with his other friends, and probably their eyes met for a millisecond, making Baekhyun choke on his kimbap.

"Oh, shit... He's coming over here."

Chanyeol cluelessly glances around him.

"Who?"

"Who else!? It's Luh-"

"Hi, guys."

Smiling, Luhan stops across from Chanyeol and Baekhyun's table. Have a seat, Chanyeol offers, and Baekhyun has to secretly roll his eyes when Luhan chooses to take a seat beside Chanyeol.

Then again, I don't want him sitting next to me, so...

"Ahem. I have something to announce," Luhan says.

"What is it?" Baekhyun asks in the most disinterested way.

"I'm transferring schools. I'm going back to China."

Silence is shared among the three; Luhan sadly smiles, looking at the two who are utterly surprised by his announcement.

"Has your Dad decided to take you back in?" Chanyeol asks.

"Yeah. He must've finally accepted that his son is gay. Haha. Anyway. I just wanna thank you guys for hanging out with me even for a short time. The moment we shared really meant a lot to me."

Is guilt Baekhyun feeling? He can't exactly tell if he's happy or sad hearing the news. Luhan is already a senior in high school and transferring schools during this time will be hard for him. He'll need to make new friends again. Graduation is just around the corner, too. How is Luhan gonna deal with all of that?

"I'm leaving next week. I guess this is the last time I'm seeing you both."

Baekhyun's response is a simple and quiet nod. Farewell. Wishing all the best for you. Hoping we don't cross paths with each other again.

"Baekhyun, can I talk to you after class?" Luhan asks.

Baekhyun flinches.

"Huh? Me?"

"Yeah. You."

Chanyeol listens, glimpsing at the two from the corners of his eyes. A sudden flashback reminds him of a night with fireworks, seeing Luhan watching from afar.

"But why?" Baekhyun asks. "Just say it now."

"I can't. It has to be private."

Oh, no. Why does he wanna talk to me? Baekhyun thinks to himself worriedly. Is this about him confessing to Chanyeol? Does he want my help? So it's gonna be like that in the end, huh...

"Just come see me later, okay? I'll wait for you in the library."

Before Baekhyun could make an excuse, Luhan had already left, leaving him confused and bothered.

"Should I go?" He asks his best friend.

Chanyeol only shrugs as he finishes his leftovers.

"Depends on you."

The fuck? What's with that cold-hearted response? This jerk...

"Fine. Don't wait up for me, then."

Alone, Baekhyun navigates through the bookshelves and finds Luhan sitting by the table close to the window. This is making him nervous.

"Hey! You came," Luhan greets him lively.

"What is it that you wanted to tell me?"

"I'll cut to the chase. I wanna talk about Chanyeol."

Shit, I knew it.

Baekhyun sucks in a deep, anxious breath, and clenches his fists. The rays streaking through the curtains during the sunset are hurting his eyes, and for some reason, hurting his heart as well. Why does he have to sit with Luhan like this? He wants to get out of here right now.

"W-what about Chanyeol?"

"Is there something going on between the two of you?"

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"You're not just friends, are you?"

Of course, we're not. We're best friends, Baekhyun says in his mind, confusion building up with the questions being thrown at him. And what does that have to do with you?

Luhan shakes his head and smiles, reaching for Baekhyun's hands.

"Anyway, I hope you don't mind me telling you this. But can you please listen to what I'm about to say first?"

No, I can't. I don't wanna listen to you. I don't wanna hear from you that you like Chanyeol. You can't go out with him. Chanyeol is my best friend. He's mine. He's only mine.

"Baekhyun?"

Baekhyun yanks his hand away.

"I'm sorry, but no. I can't help you get together with him."

"What... are you talking about?"

"You like him, don't you?"

"What?"

"Anything but Chanyeol. You can't take him away from me so back off."

Speechless, Luhan has his mouth hanging open while staring at Baekhyun whose guard is up, ready to lash out. But instead of trying to explain his real intentions, it makes him chuckle, nonetheless, seeing the way Baekhyun is frowning and gritting his teeth like a feral cat.

That was cute.

"Pfft... Hahaha! Ah, what should I do? You really are so cute."

His defense crumbling because of Luhan's unexpected response, Baekhyun backs away and yet he continues to glare daggers at him. Why is Luhan laughing? Is this guy insane?

"No wonder he's so into you. I mean, I get it... You're just so adorable."

Baekhyun crinkles his eyebrows, puzzled and unsettled.

Hold up. What is going on!?

Why is Luhan smiling like that?

Wait. Does he think I'm a joke or something?

"What do you want from me?" He manages to blurt out.

Luhan perches his chin on his hand, fondly gazing at Baekhyun as if the boy had grown beautiful flowers in the background.

"What do I want from you? Hmm..."

In just a snap of a finger, Baekhyun senses the atmosphere around them changing. Luhan used to have those soft, angelic pair of eyes that resembled a deer's. But now they're suddenly gone. He has shifted into a cunning fox sizing up his prey, waiting for the perfect chance to eat him alive.

"I can tell you already have someone in your heart but I still wanna ask you this. Do I stand a chance, even just a little?"

"A chance?"

"I like you, Baekhyun. Have been for a while now."

"What?"

"I'm interested in you. Romantically."

The gears in Baekhyun's head stop spinning. It's like his brain has malfunctioned. Question marks are plastered on his face as he blankly gapes at Luhan while trying to let this uncalled love declaration sink in. It costs him full two minutes to finally register what is happening.

"Y-you're interested in me?"

"Yup. I think you're really my type."

"YOUR TYPE!?"

Did Luhan just say I'm his type!? Is this a confession? A guy confessed to me? Luhan confessed to me? But how about Chanyeol?

What kind of plot twist is this!?

"Y-y-you... This is... What... I... I-I don't know what to say..."

Baekhyun is stuttering and Luhan is laughing at his frenzied reaction.

"Are you surprised? Were my intentions not obvious? I befriended Chanyeol so that I could get also close to you, you know."

"You can't be serious."

"But I like you! I'd do anything to get near the person I like. I'd do everything to win your heart."

Flustered, Baekhyun's eyes go wide.

"You've got to be kidding me. You can't just say that!"

"Why not?"

"We're both guys!"

"And I'm gay. I told you my secret, hoping you'd catch on. But I guess it all went down the drain..."

Baekhyun suddenly realizes one thing. His hate for Luhan? Gone. Instantly. His ill feelings are replaced by relief and happiness, finding out that Luhan doesn't like Chanyeol that way after all.

Hahaha. Can you believe that!? He doesn't wanna date Chanyeol!

"You really are dense, aren't you? You didn't realize I've got a crush on you all along?" Luhan asks, sounding disappointed. "I made sure to be super obvious, though."

Baekhyun slowly shakes his head, and now he feels genuinely embarrassed and guilty for being absolutely clueless. Has it been like this all this time? Is his point of view really different and one-sided? Is Luhan really serious about liking him?

"I... I totally have no idea..."

"When Chanyeol introduced me to you, I tried really hard to act cool in front of you. That day on the train, I sat beside you when Chanyeol offered me his seat. I was nervous you'd notice I was blushing. We got to be alone and we walked home together. You gave me your number before parting ways. I was really happy! I spent Christmas at your house and I met you during the New Year, too. It was a memorable experience for me. That time I thought I was getting pretty obvious. Even Chanyeol seemed to notice that I have feelings for you."

Baekhyun presses his palms together as a gesture of apology.

"Sorry! It didn't really cross my mind. And I apologize, I can't return your feelings. I just don't see you in a romantic way."

"Haha. Well, I expected this to happen. At least now you know how I feel," Luhan answers with a faint smile.

"Thank you for liking me. And I'm sorry. Because I, well, kinda hated you..."

"It's okay~ I forgive you."

Oh, my god. I feel so bad. This guy is such a sweetheart... Baekhyun says in his mind, recalling the days he thought of Luhan as a rival to Chanyeol's attention. I'm such an asshole!

"Do you still hate me?"

"Not anymore."

"Yay!"

Silence thickens inside the library as Baekhyun grapples with the heavy awkwardness and embarrassment in the air. Luhan is just quietly staring and smiling at him, making him fidget in his seat uncomfortably.

"Can I still keep your number?" Luhan asks after a long pause. "And contact you when I'm already in China?"

"I guess so. Just don't text me after 10 pm. I have to sleep and grow taller."

"Okay. I'll try."

"And stop texting Chanyeol too much."

"Is it Chanyeol? The one in your heart? The person you already like?"

Baekhyun pauses.

"What do you mean? He's my best friend. And he's a guy."

"Doesn't mean you can't have feelings for him? And what if he's a guy?"

"Look. What I feel for him isn't like yours, Luhan. They're different."

"Then why did you get jealous?"

"Me? Jealous?"

"You said something earlier."

You can't take him away from me so back off.

Red colors Baekhyun's cheeks, quickly avoiding his gaze.

"T-that was because... I thought you liked Chanyeol... And you wanted to go out with him. I hated the idea that if he started dating someone, he wouldn't spend time with me anymore."

"So you were jealous."

"Maybe a little."

Luhan smirks.

"Pfft. Now you're being honest."

"Don't tell him I said that."

"Do you like him?"

"Of course."

"Do you wanna date him?"

Baekhyun shakes his head aggressively.

"Huh? No! He's my pal. My buddy. He's my best friend, okay? And best friends are supposed to care for each other! You see, as a person who's known Chanyeol for a long time, I have always been the one to..."

Ah, look at this guy... He doesn't realize it yet, does he? Luhan mentally says, watching Baekhyun blabber nonstop. Well, this is what's so interesting about him...

"Actually, as a gay person. I find Chanyeol quite attractive. But I'm not really into the golden-retriever guys like him. I'm more on the puppy-type guys. Yes, I'm fond of Chanyeol as a friend. But him as my future partner? Nope. What I want is you. I like you."

Baekhyun awkwardly laughs.

"Uhm, I don't understand... Why me?"

"Why not you?"

Like a ninja, Luhan quickly transfers to the seat next to Baekhyun. He's brave enough to cup Baekhyun's cheeks and shove himself close to him, zero spaces in between.

"Look at you, Baekhyun. You're the cutest person in the world! You're handsome and adorable. You've got this pretty face and this soft, supple skin. Not to mention this charming aura! You're just full of charisma, okay? And I like your personality, too. I'm sure Chanyeol feels the same way."

Baekhyun doesn't understand what Luhan sees in him but he feels flattered, either way. So thank you?

"I doubt Chanyeol feels that way about me."

"Besides! As I said, you really are my type. You're exactly what I want as a boyfriend."

Baekhyun chokes on his saliva.

"B-boyfriend?"

"Yeah! I can be your baby girl."

"Sadly, that will never happen."

"Yeah, I know... You already rejected me, right? But can I ask you one last thing before I transfer schools?"

"What is it?

"Will you give me a farewell kiss?"

"A what?"

"A kiss on the cheek will do."

It's like Chanyeol was just waiting for this moment to drop before he finally emerges out of his hiding place, surging towards the scene to stop what's about to happen.

Baekhyun is too slow to realize his wrist is being grabbed by someone taller than him. Next thing he knows, he's already standing on his feet. Chanyeol appears in front of him and blocks his shorter figure.

"I'm sorry but we have to leave now."

Baekhyun feels his hand being enclosed inside something bigger and warmer. Chanyeol tugs him away, leaving Luhan by himself, flabbergasted.

The exit to the library feels like a blur. Baekhyun is in utter shock as everything flies by so fast. He was just seeing arrays of books with Luhan a while ago. He was smelling the scents of old paper and ink. It was suffocating.

And now he's seeing Chanyeol's worried gaze trained down at him. He's surrounded by fresh breeze and blossoming flowers outside.

"What did he say to you?"

They've arrived at an empty playground, sitting on the swing dedicated to kids and kicking pebbles on the ground.

"You were in the library the whole time?" Baekhyun asks.

"I was worried so I followed you. But I was hiding from afar. I couldn't hear what you guys were talking about."

"I thought you already went home."

"That's not important right now. Tell me what Luhan told you."

It makes Baekhyun's smile a bit, recalling his conversation with Luhan. He ends up chuckling and laughing out loud, making Chanyeol furrow his eyebrows.

"Hahaha... Luhan said... Hahaha... Well... He said that he liked me. Hahaha!"

"The fuck?"

"Luhan told me he liked me! Can you believe that?"

"And that makes you happy?"

"Why not!? It's such a relief!"

Relief? Hah. You are so dumb, Byun Baekhyun.

Chanyeol is pissed. He might have expected Luhan's confession to happen anytime soon but not this soon. It's so annoying he could punch a tree right now. And cry to himself because it would hurt so much.

"A guy just confessed to you and you're saying it didn't bother you?"

Baekhyun wipes the invisible tear that fell from his eyes from too much laughing. He's even holding his tummy.

"Why would it bother me? Luhan said he was into me! Hahaha... I mean, I'm the one he was aiming for, after all... And not you... Thank god. It was me. Haha. Pfft... How come I never noticed?"

Thank god!? Now he's even praising the Lord for Luhan's confession?

"Will you stop fucking laughing? It's not funny!" Chanyeol snaps.

"I know... This is crazy... To think that he has a crush on me! Hahaha! Someone's got a crush on me~"

Chanyeol scoffs.

"Get away from him. Don't talk to him anymore. That would be the last time. Got it?"

"It's not like I'd agree to be his boyfriend or anything."

"Still. I can't stand the thought of you hanging out with him. Even if it's a guy. Even if he's already transferring schools. Just don't get close to him anymore. Or else..."

"Or else?"

"Or else I'll get jealous. Do you understand?"

Baekhyun zips his mouth and nods.

Okay...

Chanyeol smiles. Heh.

"Good."

"Don't worry. I don't like him that way. And I'm straight."

"I know."

"Did you know all about it?"

"What? The fact that Luhan is gay? Yes. That he likes you more than a friend? Yes. It was so obvious, Baekhyun."

"Huh? Obvious!? And here I thought you were the one Luhan was going for. I thought he liked you."

"Me!? No way. We're just friends--well, I guess not anymore."

"Why not?"

Chanyeol stands up and vacates the swing.

"Because he tried touching what's mine. I will never forgive him for stealing the person I like."

Then he picks up their bags and walks ahead first.

"Let's go."

Baekhyun falls into a bewildered state as he stares at Chanyeol's silhouette approaching the orange sunset.

"W-what the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Go figure it out on your own."

Perhaps he may have blushed. Perhaps it made his heart jump. But there's no way he's telling Chanyeol that.

"Figure out what?"

"I already said it. Gosh, you are so frustrating!"

"Me, frustrating? What did I even do!?"

To be continued

(Updated every 10th, 20th, 30th of the month!)