-LINA'S POV-

All I feel is panic.

I'm going to Sin's apartment. The place he's grown without me, the place I know nothing about, the place which replaced our shared room as teenagers.

I'm not mature enough for this! How am I meant to act? I know- I've seen him now, it should be fine, but I'm absolutely petrified.

It feels like that moment in the parent trap. Except it's three years instead of eleven, and as far as I'm aware Sin and I were never married.

What the fuck do I wear?

Looking in the mirror, I huff as I place as an outfit against me, a deep sigh of frustration. What the fuck is wrong with me? I don't care what I look like, I don't care what Sin thinks about me, I don't care.

Slapping on my favourite nirvana t-shirt (a gorgeous off the shoulder black top with the classic yellow smiley) and my short purple skirt, I look in the mirror again.

I feel like me.

Nibbling my lip, I put it on my madre's necklace.

"Cuando te sientes como tú mismo, puedes sentirte cómodo contigo mismo, lo que significa que serás tu mejor yo." She says, tucking my most wildest curl behind my ear.

I beam up at her, my tiny fingers with scarily long nails playing with her necklace. "What does that mean, madre?"

"It means that when you feel yourself, your comfortable with yourself, which enables it to be your best self. Your Abuelo always used to tell me that, mi mariposa."

"I love that quote. Do you miss Abuelo and Abuela, madre?"

She nods, her thumb gently caressing my left cheek. "Of course I do, mi mariposa. They're my parents. But they don't like your daddy very much- I don't know why, he's a great daddy to you, isn't he baby?"

Letting go of her necklace, I blink back the strange alien fluids which are desperate to fall from my eyes.

Shit.

I need to leave. Else I'll be late. I can't be late.

When I arrive outside the given address, I take thirty deep breaths before I knock.

Inhale through the nose, hold it, exhale out the mouth.

An eardrum-breaking bark erupts from inside the flat; followed by two adorable whimpers. The door slowly opens to a mildly sweaty Sin, holding a gorgeous golden retriever by her red collar.

"And you must be Daisy." I coo as I enter, letting the huge creature jump all over me, soaking me in her adorableness.

"Hey, Sin. I'm good, Sin. Nope. They always come to you, don't they Daisy?" He jokes, patting his lap before his retriever companion leaps onto him.

I half-smile. "She's cute."

"Isn't she? And from what I remember, you hate that word, so I guess that's saying something."

"Ha." I retort, shuffling uncomfortably as an overwhelming wave of anxiety consumes me.

Sin's face seems to soften. "Anyway, I'll give you the tour. Follow me."

"Ok."

"This is the bathroom, so if you need to piss or anything there you go. Lizzie made me put a bin in here for when she's on her period and there is pads and tampons in there if you need it. Just saying cause I know girls freak out about that. Then this is my bedroom," he walks me to the next room, pointing inside his room, "it's pretty awesome."

His room is 'pretty awesome'. It's obvious that he's made a life for himself since I went based on the amount of money this apartment must have cost him. Despite his plain white walls, the variety of lighting and decor makes it cosy, stylish. It's Sin, through and through.

Sin continues his tour in an extremely monotonous voice; leaving me to feel relieved when he informs me it's come to an end.

"You have a lovely apartment, Sin. Kinda gives off the vibe of a rich business person." Or a twenty-seven-year old woman who was on your tongue whenever you described each room.

"And a lovely dog." I add, stroking his gorgeous golden retriever.

As if she understood my words, Daisy's tongue instantly slobbers over my face.

Gross.

Sin chuckles, before handing me a cup of tea. "Bet you've missed the most classic and almighty english drink ever."

"You know tea does exist in Spain, they just don't drink it enough, right?" I respond, a demeaning tone laced in my words.

"And there she is! I was wondering when you'd come out to play, that's my girl. I mean. Go get it, girl!" He covers up his wording with a fist bump in the air and an awkward laugh.

I bite my bottom lip before taking a delicate sip of my tea.

"Good?"

"Bit sugary." I shrug playfully, in a hopeful attempt to ease the tension and to slow my heart down- before it pounds out of my chest.

"Oh, right, of course you'd like it bitter."

I raise my eyebrow, "And what's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing, nothing," Sin smirks, raising his arms in a surrender motion, "absolutely nothing. Friendly banta, that's all. Now, weddings."

"Weddings. Yes. I have a file, it's in my bag. I decorated it on the front with photos of Rhiannon and Brandon and things that resemble them- I was thinking we could do all planning in here then give it to them when we're done."

"Yes. Yes, that's smart. I wouldn't have thought of that. Okay. So where do you want to start?" Sin asks, sitting beside me.

I pause, allowing us both a minute to think. "Well, they've given us a list of guests, so maybe write that in the file alongside their addresses? With social media it'll be easy to find."

"You sound like Joe Goldberg in that."

"Oh my god. Did you watch season 3? I binged it the minute it came out." I ask, getting slightly excited that we've found solid ground.

Sin bites his lip, a usual trait of mine. "I haven't watched episodes 9 or 10. I haven't had the time, with the preparation for the Arena tomorrow-"

"No excuses. Once we've finished today's planning, your giving yourself the time to watch You."

"Bossy." He pouts, chewing on the end of a pen I gave him out my bag.

I grab the end of the pen, rubbing his germs over his shoulder.

"Obviously. Someone's gotta be in charge, haven't they?"

"Tell me about it. I'm the bossman." He says, stroking the front cover of the file.

I ping the hairband on my arm gently against my wrist, looking up at him. "So, do you like it?"

"It's fucking amazing," he says breathlessly, "which sounds weird as it's just a file. But with the planning inside, Rhiannon and Brandon are going to fucking love it. Wow. Fuck, who knew you could be so organised and artistic?"

"They are on my long list of skills." I reply proudly, a gentle grin taking over my lips.

We begin to look at the guest lists. I seem to impress Sin with my social media stalking skills; despite the fact I only have snapchat now so I have to borrow his phone a lot of the time for it. No names stand out too much to me, apart from the friends from college, until we reach one dickhead of a male.

Paul Parker-James.

A rush of cold air overtakes my body, sending penetrating tingles down my spine. Despite this iciness, my head feels hot and clammy, my hands damp and my chest sore. My vision becomes slightly blurry.

Why didn't I think about this? Of course he would be invited. It's her mums husband, for Christ's sake, my brain just didn't... I didn't...

Oh my god. What if he walks her down the aisle? What if I have to sit on the same table as him at the reception?

"Lina? I think your having a panic attack, I'm not sure though. I got you some water, just breathe, okay? Just breathe?"

Sin's words seem to snap me back into reality and after three blinks, I smile pretentiously.

"I'm fine. Sorry. I think I'm feeling ill. Thanks for the water." I say, accepting the glass gratefully.

Sin pats his hand on my shoulder twice, then sits back down beside me. "Hey, why don't we have a break? You can watch those two episodes of You with me.. if you don't mind rewatching. Your welcome to leave if you want, but I'd like to think we can finish the guest list and start looking at themes by tonight?"

"Um. Yeah. Yeah, okay." I stutter, before swallowing and performing a more-composed look.

After finishing the series, my brain is completely focused on Sin's face. Not in a weird or awkward way, but in a he looks so shocked way.

"Flabbergasted. I'm flabbergasted. I can't believe- I mean- Woah. What an ending."

I nod intelligently. "I knew it from the beginning. That character had lasted too long; it was strange, caused too much of a mess."

"I think Ellie, Paco and Joe's baby should all team up and kill Joe." Sin says thoughtfully, looking at me intently, "He deserves to die. Bad men deserve to die, bad people."

"I think he's misunderstood. The trauma from his parents as a younger child damaged him, made him feel like he was impossible to love. His mum didn't care for him, his dad was a total dickhead which I can totally resonate with and just all of it. I think he needs help, a lot of it. If the show was real, of course."

"Your a lot maturer now, Catalina. If I had said that to you in college-"

"Then I would have taken the piss," I nod, "I know. Don't fall for this nice and mature act though, I'm still a bitch."

"And I don't doubt that. Who would want you as anything else, eh? Now what do you say, ready to continue the guest list?"

"Ready." I smile, feeling more at ease than I have in a while.

Once we've finished finding the addresses and details for all of the guest lists, we begin thinking of themes. In the end, we go for a winter fairytale theme, as Brandon is obsessed with Disney and Rhiannon always loved the snow princess in Dora. This enables us to look at pricey and classy venues; which in turn gives us a more solid plan for their wedding.

"It's weird planning a wedding with you. I always thought if we'd be planning a wedding, it would be ours."

I look at Sin quizzingly, curious as to why he decided the best way to not make things exceedingly awkward or strange between us was to mention us getting fucking married.

"You know I don't believe in that marriage bullshit. That was false hope." I joke, in an attempt to cover up the odd uneasiness resonating in my chest.

He laughs, nodding. "Yeah. Yeah, your right. If we had lasted I wouldn't have gotten to where I am, anyway. It's weird. I've spent the past few years hating you for leaving, but now your back I kinda realised you did me a favour. Don't get me wrong, a part of me is still pissed and I guess another part of me..." he trails off before shaking his head, "nah. Nevermind."

"A part of you wonders what would have happened if I never left. If I had turned around and said no, told you I loved you. Instead of saying it in my fucking head."

"You said you loved me in your head? You loved me in your head?" He mumbles, sounding slightly flabbergasted.

I shrug casually, trying to play off the serious words coming out my mouth. "Of course I did. I know, I know, the heartless bitch admitting to feelings- who would've thought? But anyway, why do you sound surprised? I told you that in the voice-"

What voicemail?

Sin had asked me earlier on. Did I imagine it? Oh my god, was I high? Was the voicemail me tripping?

"Nah. Nevermind." I shake my head, before looking at my phone.

"Look at the time! I need to leave, need to get an early night."

Sin nods, sounding slightly dazed as he speaks. "Yeah. Yeah, me too, I have lots of prep to do for tomorrow."

"Oh shit, your opening the Arena aren't you? I think Rhi and I are gonna come and check that out, she wants to support you. Well done on that."

"Thank you. I can't take all the credit though, Lizzie is an angel, she's done so much-"

Cutting him off, I head towards the door and grab m shoes. "This was nice. Let me know if you get any ideas."

"I will. I'll see you tomorrow, then?" Sin half-states, half questions.

"Tomorrow. Bye, Sin."

"Bye Catalina."