It was a few hours after Calum's outburst which had shocked us all, and I was the only one awake.

Luke had to go home to get a shower. I think he also went to go and check up on Calum, since they were still his friends, even if Ashton didn't want to have anything to do with him.

Michael was sound asleep on the couch in the corner, completely oblivious to the world around him. He had tried to calm Ashton down after my many failed attempts, and it had obviously worn him out.

As for Ashton's hand tightening around mine, it must have been a phenomenon, because ever since he had calmed and his temper had stabilized, it had gone slack again, and nothing else had moved.

I watched from the extremely uncomfortable hospital chair as Ashton slept. He seemed almost childlike when sleeping, the worry lines no longer etched upon his forehead. His veined eyelids would move and flutter ever so delicately as he dreamed away, and his usually tensed jaw was slack and relaxed. It really was a beautiful sight to behold, seeing all the worry and struggle drain from his features as he just let himself relax.

I was struggling to keep my weary eyes open when I felt the smallest of taps on my shoulder, and I slowly turned in the stiff chair to see Luke looking refreshed, with a relieved smile on his face.

"I can take over from here, you rest up," He whispered, gesturing over to the empty recliner next to the couch with Michael sprawled across. Despite Luke's kind offer, I didn't want to miss anything if Ashton was to start moving again.

I reluctantly moved over to the seat, tightening the protective wrap I had made around myself with a blanket. I was always quite cold, and in the last few months Ashton had been there to keep me warm, his strong arms enveloping me, his intoxicating scent overwhelming my senses.

But now he lay limp in the clinical white sheets of the hospital bed, all energy drained from his body due to his fight to recover from the surgery.

Ever since he woke up, every spare moment and morsel of energy has been dedicated to his futile attempts to move. He was so frustrated, his eyes filling with tears as he looked at me with desperation.

I tried to clear the memory of my love's frustration from my mind as I watched his peaceful sleeping body from across the room, my eyes fluttering shut for no more than a few seconds, before I was completely unconscious.

~

I woke the next morning to hushed whispers, my hands attempting to wipe the sleep from my aching eyes as the bright lights streaming through the window burned them from their sockets.

Slowly, I looked over to the bed, to see Michael and Ashton chatting away, Michael holding Ashton's phone in front of him and scrolling through it so he could see what was going on in the internet world at the moment.

He was always so dedicated to connecting the fans, whether it be making a keek to thank them for buying a new single or supporting them in general, to simply posting a selfie, and I couldn't imagine how saddened he must have been just due to his inability to do that.

"Morning," I yawned, stretching my arms out before walking over to the bed and sitting down beside Ashton's knee, my hand grasping his, which was still limp.

The look of utter concentration on Ash's face as he focused on our hands showed me just how hard he was trying to move it, and I used my free hand to lift his chin, my eyes finally meeting those beautiful hazel ones that I fell for over again every time I looked into their deep depths, that held all of Ashton's innermost secrets, the secrets I was yearning to unearth.

"Ash, please don't force yourself until your ready," I whispered, leaning down to press the lightest of kisses to his lips, giggling as the slight stubble tickled my face.

"I just want to be able to feel your touch so much," Ashton mumbled sadly as I pulled away from him, sighing at his sad expression.

"Ash, you're going to move again, just give yourself some time," I tried to reason with him, but the expression on his face told me he wasn't going to let this go.

He started to reply, but was soon cut off by Mike, who had been strangely quiet up until now.

"Mate, Iz is right. You need to let your stress levels go down, then we'll see about physical therapy," He suggested, and Ashton gave his friend a look as if he was about to protest, until he reluctantly nodded, resting his head back on the pillow beneath it.

"I'm gonna go home and get a shower, but I'll be back as soon as I can," I said, realising just how terrible I must have looked, and probably smelled.

"I'll see you later, I love you," Ashton sighed, looking up at me as I stood from the bed, leaning over his face.

He had a very broken, helpless expression on his face, one that reminded me of a lost puppy, and it pulled on my heart strings, almost stopping me from leaving completely.

"I love you too," I whispered as my face neared his, our lips connecting in an electrifying kiss, before I had broken it off again, walking out the door, sending him a sincere look over my shoulder as I walked out the room.

~

Calum's POV

I've fucked up big time, this time. There was no going back now.

Ashton would never forgive me after what I've done. I tore him and the one he loves apart, and put him under so much stress that it ruptured one of his bodily organs.

God, I'm a twat. I don't even know what came over me! I was in love with the idea of Isabol, so consumed by the thought that she could be mine that I forgot how it would affect my best friend.

But now I realised that I was completely deluded. She was just so much like Diana, and I felt like I needed her. But now I knew I didn't.

I needed to explain to them. I needed to tell them about Diana.

I needed to sort this out. Beg, plead. Anything to get my best friend and band back.