1) You refer to yourself as a "vagitarian"

Sorry this doesn't impress the ladies, we all know you are what you eat.

2) Consider Maroon 5 sort of "your group"

We might think you're with that guy on the other side of the club.

3) Have more than zero stuffed animals on your bed

You can be a child at heart lads but, we want "get it on" not have a tea party.

4) Refuse to remove your Bluetooth earpiece during sex.

What if work calls?, or worse your mother.

5) Posed shirtless for your Facebook profile.

This is the international douchebag sign, sorry you missed the memo.

6) Talk about how gorgeous Beyoncé is 24/7.

I'm sorry you like me but, you aren't putting a ring on it.

7) Sleep on WWF sheets.

I don't need Hulk Hogan staring at me while I'm on top honey, that's uncomfortable.