Y/N P.O.V

" For now, our love has to end. "

My eyes widened at his words as I slowly back away, shaking my head, refusing to accept reality.

" W-what? No! "

My hands clasped around my mouth as I continue walking backwards with my gaze now fixed on the floor.

This is a dream, right? A nightmare? It has to be.

Jimin extends a hand out for me and takes a step forward but I move my hand away.

" Y/N... Babe, this isn't gonna be forev-"

I didn't allow him to finish his words as I turned around and ran. Ran as fast as I could to my room.

I could hear calls from Jimin from behind me, but as tears now began to vigorously flow down my cheeks, I opened my bedroom door and slammed it shut, and locked it.

I pressed my back against the door and slowly slid down till I was sitting on the floor as my hands travelled through my hair and gripped its roots.

D-did we just break up?

Is our love over?

What if Jimin doesn't love me?

I know how he feels but I'm sure his pain is elevated.

Why does this have to happen to me? To us?

What have I ever done wrong in my past to deserve this?!

Ok, Y/N... Think on the positive side.. what if Jimin truly recognizes his love for you and not just a craving of his soul after being starved?

Oh fuck positivity, life is a bitch.

I got up and slowly walked to my bed and lowered myself down. My eyes immediately traveled to the small rectangular glass box on my dresser. I smiled a little as the memories poured in.

*Flashback*

A few weeks ago.

I opened my eyes and groaned and stretched my arms out.

" Ow! "

Immediately, I turn my head to the side to see Jimin holding his cheek.

" Awieee I'm sorryyyy " I say, and peck his cheek. " When did you even get in here? " I say with a laugh.

He smirks and says,
" Oh well, I just wanted you to start your special day with me.. "
" Special day? " I ask, furrowing my eyebrows.

Jimin's face goes neutral and I laugh,
" Oh! Oh- I forgot!! "
" Gee Y/N, you forgot. "
I peck his lips and smile as he says,
" Happy birthday sugar. "

I wiggle around in the bed in excitement and I stand up on the bed, jumping up and down, making Jimin bounce around everywhere.

" Yah!! Y/N!! " He says, trying to stand up and gain his balance.

When he stands up, he immediately grabs a pillow and I squeal and grab another one.

We walk in a circle, like we were in the martial arts and I gave out a Bruce Lee yell and hit Jimin across the face with the pillow.

I burst out laughing at the reaction on his face when my pillow collided with his face.

" Oh you're gonna get it. " He says, and hits my ass with the pillow.

I don't budge and he hits me again.

" What are you? A feather?" I say.

At that moment the soft pillow met my face and I stumbled backwards and fell onto the bed but grabbed his leg so he fell with me.

We both landed at the same time and laughed till our sides hurt. He looked at me and stroked my cheek with one hand and said,
" I have something to give you. "
I gasp and say, " oh, really? "
He nods and gets up and walks over to my dresser.

I gasp as I see him bring a rectangular glass box with something inside. The glass had a blurred design so I couldn't see what was inside.

( Imagine it's blurred glass )

" What is it? " I say impatiently.
Jimin giggles at my excitement as he sits down on the bed and places the box in front of me.

" Do I open it? " I say with wide eyes.
" Babe, of course you have to! " He says with a laugh.
I wave my hands in the air and say,
" It looks so prettyyy!!!! "
" Open itttt! " Jimin says with a pout.

I slowly lift the lid and gasp as I see a beautiful striped carnation inside. 

" Omg Jimin it's so pretty! "
" It's a special kind of flower.. this one lasts an eternity. "
" Really? How? "
" I don't know, I just got it from the shop that said it lasts forever. "
He says with a shrug a I laugh.
" It's beautiful.. " I say, looking into his eyes.

I would be lying if I thought I didn't see something different in his eyes this time.. like he was hiding something, like he wasn't telling me everything. But I decided to shrug it off and focus on his gift.

I brought it up to my nose and took a deep sniff and sighed.
" Wooowww " I say, and lean back into my soft pillow with my eyes closed.
" Yah don't faint! " He says with a laugh.
" Thank you.. " I say, and kiss him.
" Anything for you sugar. "

* End of flashback *

I sigh as I pick up the box and go to my bed. I open the lid and take out the carnation, still looking perfect.
I wonder how they make a flower that can last forever? Well, I think they should do that for all of them.
I bring the flower close to my nose and take a deep breath as the raw, sweet fragrance of the flower fills my senses.

So beautiful.. but.. I heard that every flower has a meaning right? I'm curious to know what this flower means.

I take out my phone and open Google and type in the words :
" What does a striped carnation symbolise? "
I open the first website and as I came to the middle of the sentence, my heart dropped.

.... So.. even then Jimin knew that his emotions weren't real but he wished he could feel them.. that's why something about him that day was off. Did he think I wouldn't find out? Well, one would expect a red rose for a gift like this so it was quite unusual.

I sighed and scrolled through my phone and a thought popped up in my mind as I saw Lisa's contact. I checked the time..
9:50 p.m
oh well.. she wouldn't mind right? It isn't that late.

I clicked the number and waited as it rang. Finally when she picked up, I quickly brought the phone to my ear.
" Hello? "
" Hi Lisa "
" Let me guess.. something happened?"
I sigh and say,
" You know me too well. "

She giggles from the other side and says,
" Ok tell me eVeRyThInG. "
I tell her all the events that happened and at the end of it all, she said,
" I fucking knew it. "
I furrowed my eyebrows.
" Huh? What? "
" Nothing.. "
" I heard what you said! What do you mean by 'i knew it'? Did you know about this? Why didn't you tell me?! "
I yell into the phone at the top of my voice.

There was silence from the other side and I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair.
My emotions were really unstable at this point so I couldn't control anything.
" Lisa.. I'm sorry I shouldn't have lashed out.. it's just that after- "
" Babe.. I understand! Your emotions are going haywire. Trust me, I know.. ok listen, I know just what you need right now. "

" What? "
" I'll round up Gigi and Megs and how about we have a girls night eh? "
I wish I could smile and be excited for this, but I just couldn't, not in this situation.. but I can't reject Lisa's offer either, so I give in.
" Um.. all right. What time will you guys be here? "
" By 10:15? We can sleepover in your room. "
" Ok.. "

Right now, I just wish that Jimin was here to join us...

I decide to go and tell Jimin that the girls are coming over and so I get up and stand in front of his door.

I just stood outside, not knowing what to do. I balled my fist to knock but just before my knuckle reached the door, I pulled it back, wondering if I should.

I put my ear to the door, and there was silence. Worry grew inside me, hoping he was ok..

I knock and bite my lower lip in nervousness.
" Come in " I hear his voice and I open the door slowly.
I see him sitting on his bed, with his back facing me. I haven't really seen his room before and it's quite different than any other room I've seen.

There was a huge wallpaper with a black rose on it, and Jimin had multiple black roses all over his room.
The door to his room had a black rose engraved on it, there was a bunch of them in a vase on his dresser, there was a black rose pattern on his cupboard, and now that he was sitting shirtless, I notices a tattoo on his back - a black rose.

There definitely has to be a meaning behind black roses too..

" What is it? " Jimin asks softly, his voice devoid of emotion.

" U-um.. I just wanted to tell you that the girls will be coming over.. "
He nods his head, with his back still to me.
" Would you like to join us? "
He scoffs and shakes his head,
" No thanks.. "
" Ok.. I'll get going now.. "

Without another word, I leave the room and close the door behind me.
I hate this feeling..

I look at the time and sigh.
10:05 p.m
They should be almost here.. I'll get some snacks.

*  Time skip *

A loud dinging of the doorbell was heard throughout the house and Jimin's mother bumped into me as we both went for the door.

" Are you expecting someone? " She asks with a smile.
" Yes, my friends are here.. I asked Jimin if they could come. "
" Ahhh ok.. I'm sorry about you and Jimin though.. he's been going through a rough patch lately.. "
I furrowed my eyebrows and ask,
" How did you know about what happened? "
She laughs and says,
" Honey, next time find a quiet place to talk, and not in the hallway of paintings where a whisper is like thunder.. "
I blushed in embarrassment and bowed,
" Yes.. "

I rushed over to the door and open it to see Lisa, Gigi and Megs standing there. I hug them and invite them in. They greet Jimin's mom and they follow me to my room.

I really feel bad if I have fun and Jimin is all alone.. He could have called me to be with him.. we're still friends.. right?

" Whoaaa how the heck is there a tree as your roof? " Megs says, staring up at the glass ceiling.
" Jimin chose this one for me.. it's a glass ceiling. "
" Speaking of Jimin, where is he? Let's invite him here! " Gigi says with a smile, plopping down on my bed and taking a bag of chips before tearing it open with her teeth.

I sigh and Lisa glances at me before we all sit down on the bed.
" I have a LOT to tell you.. "

~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~

" What the fuck?! " Megs says after I finish telling them everything from my past, to the fight Jimin and I had which led to our breakup. But I didn't tell them about Jimin's past because it's not my story to tell. I just told them that he lost someone special to him.

Gigi just stares at me speechless and Lisa puts an arm around me.
" Girl you've gotta try and get him back! " Megs says, smacking my leg.
Immediately, Lisa says,
" No! She won't be getting him back! He's done enough bullshit and this isn't the first time.. "

But.. I want to get him back.. It's not his fault for any of this, he just has to figure himself out.. but I fear that his past has taken his confidence and emotions out of him.. I really hope his feelings for me were true.. after everything that has happened, I want him to be the one that holds me, kisses me and comforts me.. nobody can take his place. No one.

" I want to get him back. " I say bluntly.
" What?! Y/N what do you mean? Why would you wanna do that after he played you? " Lisa says with a shocked face.
" He didn't play me! Stop saying that! He's gone through a lot and I understand him. I'm giving him time for him to set things straight. "
" Y/N.. This is exactly what happened with all the other girls.. " Lisa says, trying to speak in a calm voice when inside, she was fuming.

" No! I refuse to believe that shit! I-i know that he's in there somewhere and I'm not giving up on him just yet."
Lisa sighs in frustration as she runs her hands through her hair.

Why is she so bothered about this? Ever since Jimin and I have started dating, she's been acting weird.

" Ok.. let's just take our minds off this." Gigi says and I nod.
" Movie? " Megs says with an eyebrow raised. They knew how much I loved movies. I could watch the same movie for a whole month and not be bored.

But I just don't feel any excitement anymore. I feel like I should be crying myself to sleep at this point but it seems as though my body has run out of tears to shed. As much as I want to, I can't.

As we were bringing all the snacks along with blankets and pillows to the living room, a bellowing boom resonated in the air and when I looked outside, I could see thick, dark clouds rolling through the night sky, restricting the light of the stars from reaching the earth.

I love rain. I wish I could just be alone on my balcony, getting completely soaked by the falling raindrops.

" Do you wanna watch a horror movie? " Gigi asks, moving the cursor on the TV to the horror section.
" HELL NO. " Megs and I yell in unison and we all burst out laughing.

When it comes to horror movies, I'm the biggest coward. I watched ONE horror movie in third grade and I have never seen another one since then.  ( That's actually true 😂 )

Gigi rolls her eyes and says,
"

Wuss.. anyways, what do you wanna watch? "
I gasp as I see a certain TV show I love show up in the options.
I point to it and say,
" F.R.I.E.N.D.S !!!! Let's watch all the seasons again pleaseeeee! "
Lisa giggles and puts an arm around my shoulder, pulling my closer to her so my head was leaning on her shoulder.

Why does this feel weird? This is how best friends behave, yet there's a twisty feeling in my stomach that tells me it isn't right.

During the episode, we suddenly flinch as the deafening sound of thunder fills the air.

~Meanwhile~

A/N P.O.V

Jimin sat in his room, feeling dead on the inside, like he was a hollow mannequin.. No feelings, nothing. He didn't feel sadness, he didn't feel joy, he didn't feel love. He only felt the overwhelming feeling of pain. It engulfed his body until he became numb to it.

It wasn't a physical pain.. it was emotional. He felt like every breath he took was like inhaling poison. He was slowly dying from the inside out, and nobody could do anything to help him... That is.. no-one he cared about.

He knew Y/N could help bring him back, but as the old feelings of the past slowly came back, heating up his heart and igniting small flames, he would douse them out.. not wanting to feel those emotions, only to be broken again.

He slightly flinched as the thunder boomed in the air and as the familiar sound of the droplets of rain tapping against his window, memories of that day flooded his memory.

He stood up from his bed, and slowly opened his balcony door and stepped outside. Each raindrop that kissed his skin heightened his senses. Every raindrop was the same as they sang of the same memory.

He didn't need a photograph to remember. With every drop that made paths on his skin, he could hear his dear uncle talking to him.

The raindrops poured down on him by the millions. He closed his eyes as the drops cascaded from the black velvet sky. Rain is the type of weather that cleanses and washes anew, but for Jimin, the rain flooded him with the past.

But he accepted it, and embraced it for he knew, that the rain felt him on that day, his cries were absorbed by each droplet and his tears became indistinguishable with the rain.
They were the witness to his horrors, and they whisper it in his ears with each drop that lands on him.

As he opened his eyes, it took him some time for his eyes to adjust to the darkness along with the continuous battering of water down on him.

There came a brilliant flash that flickered across the sky and died. The lightning ripped through the inky sky, causing a fracture in the pure firmament that lay on the earth.
It was like a giant camera flash, blinding you for a few seconds and then it seems as though the sky had healed itself, as the darkness once again engulfs the place where the lightning had created its path.

Another flash burned into his dilated pupils followed by its cracking boom. It's like as though the lightning was a creature, trying to free itself from the bonds of the dark clouds. Jimin found himself in that situation, trying to free himself from the bonds of pain that engulfed him day in and day out.

The rain brings about a rich hue to everything around it. The brown soil deepens in color as the green leaves are coated with a glossy layer of the raindrops.

But for Jimin, the rain only deepened his darkness, and added another shade of grey to his black and white life.

A/N : I know these parts are boring af, but I'm really trying to fit his emotions with my plot and make everything come together and make sense.
I hope I'm doing that..

And I'm doing a casting!

Park Jimin:

Kim Taehyung :

Jeon Jungkook :

Kim Seokjin :

LaLisa Manoban :

Lee Taemin :

Kim M/N (y/n's mom) :

Park Minhyo :

Park Jihoon :

Park JiHan-Jae :

The character Y/N is whoever you want her to be, so I don't want to put an image of her for the casting.

Since the characters Gigi and Megs are my best friends in real life, I can't post an image of them either, so you guys can imagine your own best friends in this situation.

I won't be putting in Y/N's dad's face here because he isn't an important part of this FF, and I don't wanna confuse you guys.