In which going back to school was worse than expected.

I'm kinda scared that this is going to be a self-fulfilling prophecy haha. (Edit: oh, you sweet innocent me from a year ago. You had no idea this was going to come true.)

Read: it was all going so well (at least it kind of was), and now it's not.

You know how a lot of times I have sentences that you read as foreshadowing that actually aren't? That are *kind of* a mix of foreshadowing and irony? Yeah, that's gonna be real in this chapter.

Wow who has possessed me and written this dark intro?

Well, we'll just have to see how this turns out...

Enjoy! :)

-------------------------------------------

Warning: transphobia and homophobia

Monday morning came brutally and unforgivingly.

Especially for Tony, who accidentally couldn't fall asleep until 1:00 am. Legitimately not his fault; but no one--especially the school--would ever believe him.

Especially for Jack, who hates that his two week escapism period is over.

No matter how everyone is feeling, there is one thought that they all have in common:

All right. Let's get this over with.

----------------------------------------

Nearly everyone at school looks tired. There are the rare few who look refreshed.

Tony envies anyone capable of falling asleep before midnight.

"This has got to go under cruel and unusual punishment," Tony grumbles as he and Sean walk into the building together, neither feeling fully awake.

"Probably," Sean agrees. "But the government and the country and the school like to pretend that the school system is completely functional without any faults, so no one's going to do anything about it."

Tony groans. "Are they aware of how many studies are in favor of middle schools and high schools starting later in the morning? And how some people are night owls, and can't go to sleep at the right time to get 8 to ten hours of sleep in the world we live in? Why did neurotypical cishetallo early birds get to make all the decisions of how the world works, and criticize anyone who doesn't follow their particular lifestyle?" He scoffs and shakes his head. "This is homophobic."

"Okay, I know it's fun to call everything homophobic," Sean reasons with him, "but I know that there are plenty of gays who can function before 9:00 am."

"Yeah, well, I'm not one of them," Tony mutters.

Sean gently steers Tony out of the way of nearly bumping into someone. 

"See? I rest my case," Tony declares.

Not that he clearly stated his definitive point anyway.

"Normally, I'd advise against ADHD and coffee..." Sean comments, "but I think you need it right now."

"False," Tony corrects him. "Coffee calms down people with ADHD. Too much science to explain right now. Still. You would be calming me down instead of waking me up."

"Oh, I didn't know that," Sean responds. "Sorry about that. I'll keep that in mind."

If Jack didn't get to see David first thing in the morning, he'd probably lose it.

But there he is.

Jack smiles when he sees him. He can't help it.

David makes him happy.

Jack...still hasn't figured out a way to tell David about their past lives search. He's been putting it off since New Year's Day.

Maybe one of my New Year's resolutions should have been to work up the courage to talk to David about this.

But now it's past New Year's Day, and Jack really doesn't have the mental energy for...anything, really.

Aside from David, Jack's only other saving grace today is the GSA. Because if he doesn't have their GSA...he doesn't know what he'll do.

As Tony gets his lunch out of his locker, a trans pride pin he bought recently falls out and clatters on the ground. He meant to pin it on his backpack earlier today.

No time like the present, I guess, Tony thinks as he crouches down to get it.

Right before he grabs it, he hears someone say in a snarky voice, expensive shoe right next to the pin, "aw, look at that! Is that the trans colors? Is this a transgender?"

Tony swallows as he reaches for the pin, trying not to touch the Delancey's shoe. He doesn't care which one is speaking; neither are good news.

"Aw, it thinks it's valid!" the Delancey, probably Oscar, continues in that jeering voice.

Tony clenches his fists. He feels the pin dig into his hand. He doesn't care. "I am valid." He stands up, looking away from the Delanceys. The less interaction made, the better. He focuses on moving stuff around in his locker. "And I don't need transphobes like you telling me elsewise."

"Is there a problem here?" Jack's voice calls out from behind the three people.

Grazie al cielo.

True, Jack would never let Tony hear the end of it if Tony ever referred to Jack as a knight in shining armor. Nonetheless, he's glad that Jack showed up.

"That's funny," Jack continues, coming closer. "I thought I told you two not to come near Tony, Sean, Charlie, or David, or there would be bad news."

"And what are you going to do about it?" Morris sneers.

"You got a problem with us?" Oscar snarls.

Jack gets all up in his face. "Beat it."

Tony wishes that some day he'll be able to convey the same level of determination and stone-solid conviction of Jack Kelley. He's so glad that they're friends and not on opposing sides.

Much to his relief, they leave.

He shuts his locker and turns around to face Jack, not really looking him in the eye.

Now with the Delanceys gone, Jack's expression softens. "Hey Tony, you okay-?"

He lets out a little exclamation of surprise as he's caught off guard by Tony suddenly hugging him.

Thank you, Tony wants to say, but no sound comes out. He feels a lump in his throat and his eyes beginning to water.

Aw, it thinks its valid!

Those words echo in his head.

"Hey." Jack wraps his arms around Tony. "It's okay. Shh, shh."

Tony breathes in shakily.

"Deep breaths," Jack murmurs. "Deep breaths." He inhales deeply and exhales deeply. "Just like that. It's okay. You're okay."

Tony inhales and exhales just like Jack did, but his are much more shaky. His teeth are pretty much chattering. He himself is shaking slightly too.

He hates crying at school, but he can't help it in this moment.

It's moments like this where he feels especially weak.

He's completely helpless.

He's helpless to the external forces around him, and the internal struggles within.

"It's okay," Jack keeps talking in that gentle voice. "You're okay. Whatever they said isn't true. You are the most amazing, valid person in the world. You care a lot about the things that everyone casts to the side. You get so excited talking about the things you love. You are so special, you know that, right? I don't care if Racetrack Higgins was an awesome person. Even if you are the same person, kind of, I prefer you. I will gladly choose Tony Vitale any day. Every day."

Tony hugs him tighter. Jack squeezes him gently.

"Ready to go to GSA?" Jack asks softly.

Tony exhales one last time, the least shaky breath he takes. Not trusting his voice quite yet, he nods.

The thing about their GSA is that it pretty much happens whenever they need it to.

Wednesdays and Fridays during lunch are definitely the most common, but there are days like today where everyone just feels like coming to Mr. Denton's classroom for an impromptu GSA.

Plus, first day back from break, Mr. Denton always brings extra snacks. To help them through the rest of their first day back, he claims. 

Today, it's mostly the usual crowd. Not that anything is wrong with that. There are eight people in the room already: Nick, Louis, Sean, Charlie, David, Sarah and Kathryn (who joined the GSA a little later in the year), and Mr. Denton.

Jack and Tony are the last ones to enter.

Jack squeezes Tony's hand encouragingly one last time. After that, Tony immediately heads for Sean.

"What happened?" Sean asks immediately, extremely concerned, as Tony buries his face in Sean's shoulder and grabs his hand, squeezing tight. "Are you okay?" When Tony doesn't answer, Sean looks at Jack, wanting some answer.

"He's fine, just a little shaken," Jack explains softly. "There was...transphobia." He'll let Tony explain it all when he's ready.

Everyone in the room clenches their fists.

The 21st century was supposed to be moving along just fine when it came to equal rights and starting to erase discrimination.

But if there's transphobia in their high school, what does that say about every where else?

All of them start getting tense and just on the verge of angry, but none are like Sean.

With the hand that isn't intertwined with Tony's, Sean balls his hand into a fist so tight and hard that he feels his fingernails digging into his skin.

He wants to find whoever did this to Tony.

He wants names, direct quotes, exact actions, and directions to wherever whoever it was is right now so Sean can teach them a lesson they'll never forget.

Because no one does this to his Tony.

No one has the right to be transphobic at all.

Sean will fight for Tony until the world ends. He'll start by making whoever did this pay, and making sure it never happens again.

Sean feels a fierce protectiveness over Tony. He always has. The thing is that Tony is a part of so many marginalized groups that that in itself leaves him vulnerable. Tony isn't straight, isn't cisgender, isn't neurotypical. Even just one of those is enough to make him a perfect target for discrimination.

Some days, GSA is talking about everything lightheartedly, other times, they have real matters to discuss; unhappy matters.

This is one of those days where they'll have something very real and very serious to talk about.

"Tell us what happened," Sean urges Tony quietly. "Whenever you're ready."

Tony takes in a deep breath and sits up taller. He needs to make sure he actually has good posture if he wants to bind safely. He hasn't let go of Sean's hand, though.

He swallows. "It was...the Delanceys." He doesn't want to get too into detail. "They...didn't use many kind words."

"Were there any slurs?" Sean asks worriedly. "Because even if they said just one, we can go straight to the principal and get them in trouble for that."

Tony shakes his head. "Thankfully, no. But they did..." he doesn't want to say it. He really doesn't want to say it.

"Misgender me," he mumbles. He swallows. "They used the pronouns they would use for the chair right there," he points to a chair near them.

It only takes a moment for the meaning of that to sink in.

Not only are Sean's fists now clenched, so are his teeth. He is beyond angry now.

"They need to get expelled," he says through gritted teeth.

"If only they could get expelled for that," Jack sighs. "I don't think it's enough."

"Suspended, then."

Suspended forever.

"Or maybe we should teach people to not be transphobic?" Tony points out. "Or homophobic? Or heck, just any kind of phobic that's about uncomfortability about a person's humanity?"

Everyone's agreeing with him.

"We need to educate people," Kathryn jumps in. "Things like this shouldn't happen anymore. We're not living in times where being gay or trans almost always meant death. Things should be better now."

Why are we still talking about this? Sean wants to shout. Why aren't we going out there and pummeling the living daylights out of the Delanceys?

Sean shakes the thought away. He's not violent.

Is he?

I will be if anyone's homophobic or transphobic towards Tony.

"Sadly, there will always be those who can't accept people like us," Mr. Denton tells them. "No matter how far we can ever come, there will always be someone, whether they are conservative or not, who can't accept us for who we are."

Jack sits up taller. "Yeah, well, then we'll just stand our ground. Show them we can't be messed with. Show them that what they're doing is messed up. Take down all adversity and discrimination that we can."

Proud and defiant, we'll slay the giant.

Whatever that means.

"Educating people is the key," Mr. Denton agrees. "Which is why I believe that that's what we should start working on next."

That gets everyone excited. Sometimes in GSA, this is one of the things they do: they start projects to help make things better in their school. 

"Educating helps everyone," David cuts in, not knowing what he's doing. "Not just those who are transphobic or homophobic. Those who are questioning, or don't come from the most open households. There are plenty of people who feel lost with their identity, without knowing all these words and terms that could help them. And there are plenty of people even within the LGBTQ+ community who aren't educated about everything." He feels like he's been talking too long. He averts his eyes. "And yeah, educating people ends up helping everyone."

"Educating people is the first step towards a better and brighter future," Tony murmurs.

David hears him. "And the world will live as one," he adds, acknowledging what Tony said, quoting John Lennon.

And this is how the rest of the GSA goes. They all talk about how they're going to go about doing this, how many people this will validate, and how it will benefit everyone over all. They are all pretty excited for this.

Unfortunately, lunch ends. Lunch never lasts that long anyway.

"The lunch time slot is homophobic," Tony complains.

"Today is just another every annoyance is homophobic day, huh?" Sean says as they walk out of the classroom together.

"Pretty much."

Jack and David leave the classroom together too.

"I like what you said awhile back," Jack tells him. "About how educating everyone benefits everyone."

"Oh." David blushes. "I was just thinking off the top of my head."

He wishes that he got educated sooner. If he had known all these terms existed, that he didn't have to choose between being asexual and bisexual, and that he's valid, maybe things would have been different, maybe he would have had a lot less inner turmoil.

He's here now, though. So something must have gone right.

Jack kisses him on the cheek. "I think you're very smart and more people need to listen when you speak."

David's blush grows even more. He glows at the praise.

They go their separate ways, completely unaware of the Delanceys far off to the sides, observing, calculating.

And it was going so well for them for the rest of the day.

Until the last class, that is.

That's when Jack and David, in their separate classes, were told to go straight to the principal's office instead of their last class of the day. They were both absolutely bewildered, but they can't do anything accept oblige.

Whatever reason they're missing out on Mr. Denton's class for had better be worth it.

It's worse. It's so much worse.

They walk in at the same time, asking each other, do you know what this is about? without the other knowing the reason. So, reluctantly, they sit in the two chairs at the table facing the principal on the opposite side of them.

Jack's been at this school since ninth grade, and he knows for a fact that Mr. Pulitzer hates him with all his might. Jack's not entirely sure what he did. True, he gets in trouble, and yeah, Jack dated Mr. Pulitzer's daughter ... but Jack is pretty sure there's an uncalled for animosity in the principal's glare.

"Do either of you know why you were called in here?" Mr. Pulitzer asks them calmly, on the verge of more than a little intimidating, in a low voice.

Jack just shakes his head. David, paralyzed by fear, stammers, "N-no, sir."

"I heard that you two showed PDA in the hallway," the principal tells them.

That little kiss on the cheek in the hallway after lunch.

But who-?

Of course.

Jack should have guessed.

They already came after Tony today.

Why wouldn't the Delanceys come after Jack--and David--as well?

Jack is not having this right now.

"Do you see how many people make out in the halls?" Jack bursts flatly. "Daily?"

"We're not here to talk about them, we're here to talk about you," Mr. Pulitzer replies smoothly.

Jack raises an eyebrow, trying not to seem fazed. "Is this because I dated Kathryn-?"

"She shouldn't have tangled with such a trouble maker like you," Mr. Pulitzer cuts him off firmly. "I thought you two breaking up would be the last I would have to deal with you, but no."

Jack rolls his eyes.

David, meanwhile, is mesmerized by Jack.

How is Jack this calm and confident?

After being called in to the principal's office?

About PDA?

The truth is, it's eleventh grade, and at all the schools David's been in, never once has he sent to the principal's office because he's gotten in trouble. So this is all new to him. And terrifying. He has no clue how he should be acting.

However, he's not convinced Jack's the best example.

"Are we not talking about all those other people making out because they're straight?" David asks suddenly. He has no idea where that came from. Or what to do next. 

That gets the principal's attention on him. "What?"

David swallows, and repeats what he said. Then he adds, "I don't know if I would call a kiss on the cheek PDA. Do you call in all the kids who make out as well?"

Both Mr. Pulitzer and Jack are stunned.

But in addition, to stunned, Jack is amazed, proud, and totally falling harder for David.

I didn't know he had this in him, Jack thinks, biting back a smile.

"Just say you're homophobic and you hate me," he says. "That will make all of this a lot easier."

Mr. Pulitzer sighs, looking at his desk. When he looks back up, he says, "starting tomorrow, all students must eat in the lunchroom. We need to make sure that everyone is accountable for at all times."

Both Jack and David's stomachs drop.

But that means...

"You're just trying to stop our GSA!" Jack accuses. "I know that there are other people and clubs who meet in other classrooms, but this is aimed directly at us."

Mr. Pulitzer says nothing to confirm or refute Jack's accusation. "This is your first warning. Now, you're both dismissed. Go to your last class."

Jack stands up, defiance in his eyes. "You can't do this."

"Jack, I think he can," David murmurs as he stands up.

No one says anything else as the two exit the principal's office.

They come into class nearly ten minutes late. 

I need to talk to Mr. Denton, Jack thinks. Badly.

Mr. Denton's eyes flash when Jack and David come in late, acknowledging that they're there. He trusts he'll get the full story later.

When class ends, Jack urges everyone who was at GSA to stay after class. Most of them don't have anywhere to go anyway. They all want to know what this is about.

"The reason why we were late was because we were called to the principal's office," Jack begins to explain.

"Ok, Jack, you I understand, but what did David do?" Tony asks, obviously back to his humorous sarcastic self.

Which Jack would appreciate, if there weren't more pressing matters at hand.

Jack glares at him. "Sorry, Tony. Now's not the time for that." He turns back to everyone else. "Apparently, David and I put on a public display of affection; which was too much for his homophobic brain to handle."

All lighthearted thoughts from anyone evaporated.

And then Jack drops the bomb.

"Starting tomorrow, everyone has to eat in the lunchroom."

That affects everyone.

"Did he give any reasoning?" Mr. Denton ask.

"He claimed it was to keep everyone accountable, but I know it was directly aimed at us."

"But what about all the clubs?" Tony bursts. "All the affinity groups? What about GSA? What about the kids who get sensory overload who find peace and quiet eating in the library? Why do we all have to fit into a neat little box that society wants to force us unto?"

Everyone starts talking at once, voicing their own concerns. This is not going to end well.

"Wait, wait, wait," Jack says. He has a thought; only half thought out. "What if we just didn't show up at school tomorrow, or for the rest of the week, as a kind of protest?"

"What, kind of like a strike?" David comments dryly, thinking about the kind of things they're learning in history right now, absolutely done with everything right now. He wants to go home and for this nightmare to end.

Jack brightens up. "Yeah, exactly like a strike!"

"Jack no!"

---------------------------------------

You have no clue how long I've been waiting to write that ending.

That has made my day.

That little four line conversation between Jack and David has lived in my head rent free for around three months now haha.

And it makes me laugh every single time I think about it.

Aaaaaaaaand now I have a lot of explaining to do.

Let me just say, writing the transphobic scene made me want to cry. I take absolutely no joy in writing transphobia, or homophobia, or any other discriminatory phobia for that matter. And the thing about that transphobia is that it hits so close to home for me. I haven't had anything like that directly to my face. But I have friends who face transphobia, and I hear transphobic things about people I know, and I have been told by people I'm not out to that they/them pronouns (MY pronouns) aren't real.

(Edit: here I am, a year later, crying over the paragraph of Jack comforting Tony)

And I absolutely refuse to write slurs. Any time I hear slurs used in real life, I etiher shut down or am one second away from shutting down.

Homophobia and transphobia hurt everyone.

Oh, and here's another thing: how many other people out there thought that they had to be bisexual or asexual? This is why we need representation on both. Because there are people who think that they have to be one or the other, or that their attraction is so weird it has to be one of those. Or there are those like me, who identify as asexual biromantic. Education on these things is important.

Education on all these things, for that matter. I cannot stress that enough.

Now for a transition...

We're getting a flashback chapter next.

Please, no homophobia or transphobia, profanities, hate etc in the comment section.

Best,

~Your Beloved Author (who despises all forms of discrimination and wishes that the world can find a way to live as one)