My Child who is named after a fictional character: Mom! I went to the library today and I got this book called-

Me: The Hunger Games! Oh my gosh child you make me so proud!!!!!!!

Child: No, it's called T-

Me: The Maze Runner!!!!!! You are literally the best child to ever walk this earth!!!!!!

Child: No mom, it's called Twilight.

Me: Go to your room and think about what you've done. I will no loner associate myself with you.

I hope I didn't offend any Twilight lovers.... I personally can't stand Twilight.

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Doctor: What will you be naming your daughter?

Me: Primrose. Wait- Peony. I changed my mind again, I want her to be named Cress. Wait again!!! Rue!!! That's her name!!!! No- what about Tris? WAIT!!!!!! I MADE UP MY MIND!!! NO-*starts sobbing uncontrollably*

Doctor:..............

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Singing lullaby to child: Deep in the meadow, under the willow.
A bed of grass, a soft green pillow.
Lay down your head, and close your eyes. And when they open, the sun will rise.....

Or a different lullaby: Sweet crescent moon, up in the sky, You sing your song so sweetly, After sunshine passes by.....
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Me: I'm so glad you guys could come to my child's birthday party!!! Let's play a game!!! It's called the hunger games!!! Here are your foam swords and nerf gun!!!! May the odds be ever in your favor!!!!
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Me: *Sees daughter texting someone* Who are you texting?

Daughter: No one

Me: *grabs phone*

Daughter: Mom! Give me back my phone!

Me: You're texting a boy!!!! I ship it you guys!!!!

Daughter: *facepalm*
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Me: Child!!!! Get indoors now!!!! You can't write fan fictions while your playing with you friends outside!!!! You can come outside after you've finished the next chapter of your Lunar Chronicles fanfic!!!