It takes a little while before we're given the all-clear to actually step foot outside of the base. The news made me want to pursue Bucky's idea even more. I mean, a life without all this? A life that I could have possibly been living? Who wouldn't want that?

But I'm still holding back one week after the news was announced. I do want that ordinary life that Bucky's supposedly thought about and never told me, but at the same time, I don't want to abandon S.H.I.E.L.D. I'd be abandoning Vanessa if I did so, and everyone I've come to like here. I don't want to just throw it all away.

I know it's not just me feeling the reluctance bug, I know Bucky is too. He's torn, just like me. He wants to stay here and help out, but that new start is teasing him now that it's so close to being possible. It's tormenting us both, practically dangling itself in our faces.

We haven't brought up the discussion since Bucky initially brought up the idea. And that was a few weeks ago. We need to address it soon before it's forgotten about entirely and the regret settles in.

I get an early start this morning, showering and dressing before Sharon is awake enough to ask me what I'm doing. I take the familiar route to Bucky and Rogers' room. I make sure to listen in. They're probably still sleeping. But instead of two snores, I only hear one. Someone's up early.

I don't bother to knock, as I don't want to disturb whoever's on the other side of the door. I'm not sure if either of them are really morning people. I don't want to find out today. I backtrack to my room in case Bucky is the one who's up and decided to try and find me in the room.

I find no one waiting for me, only the closed door with Sharon on the other side. I purse my lips. Hmm. Explore or get breakfast? It doesn't take long for my stomach to settle that question for me.

I pull myself to the cafeteria, where there are a select few agents stationed, eating. Some look like they're asleep, with their heads down on the tables. I scan the way to find someone recognizable. Unfortunately, I don't.

As I get my food, I'm brought back to the cafeteria on the Helicarrier, where I first got properly introduced to Bucky. I remember almost thinking that he and Vanessa had been together, with the way they acted towards each other. That was back when I knew nothing about S.H.I.E.L.D. or Hydra. I still don't know every single detail of either organization, and I may never. I may never want to either, some things can stay out of my mind.

I eat in silence at a lone table while others talk in sleepy tones. One agent is beginning to snore, and I can't help but giggle to myself. I focus on my food and try to keep my mind empty. I need to put a chip on him or something so I know where he is.

I'm sure I look like a zombie with the way I pull myself out of the cafeteria. The moment I'm out and the door is closing behind me, I'm grabbed from the side, pulled away from prying eyes. I almost scream, but my back is against the wall, and a soft mouth is over mine. I laugh and grow red at how stupid I was about to be.

"Good morning," Bucky croons, resting his forehead against mine.

"You scared me," I whimper.

"Sorry. I was looking for you."

"Funny, I was looking for you."

"I've got an idea."

"What's it regarding?"

"Our new start."

"Okay."

"I say we negotiate. Today."

I blink. "Today? So soon?"

"Dani, if we don't now, we might never." He cradles my cheek with his hand. "This is the perfect time to bring it up."

"Wait, I heard 'negotiate.'"

"You heard correctly."

"Why are you saying that?" I tilt my head.

"You and I both know we don't want to let go of this entirely. We should try to find a happy medium."

I purse my lips. "Good point." I pale. "Wait...you want to go to Fury about this? Why can't we just walk out?"

"When did you become afraid of the pirate?"

A laugh slips out at Bucky's joke. "I'm not afraid of him, he and I don't get along. We clash a lot. He didn't want me anywhere near you or Jessabelle when we were rescued and brought here."

"Well, we'll fight hard then. I don't think he'll be too upset if we chose to stay with S.H.I.E.L.D. but start over."

"I guess we'll find out one way, won't we?"

The metal hand presses into my side, sending chills through my body. We sort of stay there, in the hall, just outside of the cafeteria. We embrace the silence for a little bit before I peel off the wall and walk alongside Bucky, hand in hand with him.

It's almost an entire day, trying to find the Director. I've only seen him in the one room where I was pulled into a meeting. I don't know where his actual room is.

We find Agent Hill luckily, since we know she's the best person to ask about Fury. She gives us the directions to his office. Out of natural curiosity she asks why. We only tell her it's important, and we keep it at that. Not a smart decision, because she looks suspiciously towards us and offers to tag along. I don't attempt to push her in the other direction, as I'm sure she wouldn't be deterred easily. We let her take lead to Fury's office while we linger in the back.

We approach an elevator, and I balk. Even though it isn't open, paralyzing thoughts swim to mind. Running for my life. Thinking I'm safe in an elevator. A hole ripped through the top. The Winter Soldier trying to pop my head off with his bionic arm.

"Dani?"

I'm using Bucky as support once I come back to the present. I'm hyperventilating, I feel like fainting. Agent Hill has a concerned look on her face. I turn away from the elevator in hopes that'll help me settle down.

"What shook her?" Agent Hill asks neutrally.

"It's the elevator," Bucky says gravely.

"Why would that freak her out?" I guess Bucky sends her a look, because a second later she says, "Oh."

"Dani." Bucky has me in his arms, stroking my hair while I tremble. I know that won't happen again, but I can't help it. "Nothing's going to happen, I promise."

I shake my head as I bury it in his chest.

"Is it better if we take the stairs?" Agent Hill suggests.

It's sad to say that I nod to the suggestion. Though none of us are happy about it, I don't want to be forced in the elevator. I'll be comfortable in one again soon, just not today.

I keep my eyes away from the transportation as Agent Hill leads us to a stairwell. We descend, our footsteps echoing in the air. My breathing is back to normal, as is my heartrate. I feel stupid for acting how I did with the elevator.

It was something I didn't prepare for, something I didn't know how to control.

After a few flights down, we exit and walk a long stretch of hallway before Agent Hill finally leads us to our destination. The door is open, which is surprising to me. I expected Fury to have his door closed, he seems like a very secretive kind of guy.

This office screams the Director: a big desk that's rather organized, shelves full of sentimental things. The biggest thing that stands out is the world map he's got stuck to a bulletin board that's dotted with colored pins. Must be for Hydra. I expected something a little more high-tech out of this office.

We must be interrupting Fury's daydreams, because he turns his eye at our entrance. I fall a bit behind Bucky, trying to collect my bearings.

"If it is about Finley, I don't grant you permission to interrogate her," he says coldly, more specifically to Bucky and me.

"Sir, we're not here for that," Buck says on our behalf.

"Oh? Enlighten me." Fury leans in on his desk.

"Since the all-clear was given for us to be free to move about the world now, we figured we might take advantage of it. Since you're the highest up, we know you have to grant permission with that sort of thing."

"So you two want out?"

"Not necessarily," I say quietly. Agent Hill watches us with a cool expression. "While we want more than anything to be somewhere quiet, we're still part of S.H.I.E.L.D. We don't want to stay here the rest of our lives, but we don't want to drop everything and run either."

Fury rests back in his chair. "And why do you think I'd give you permission?"

"Sir, we all deserve fresh air." I scratch my thigh. "I'm sure at some point this will travel or maybe spread out again. Who knows? We want to take advantage before something bad happens."

"What did you have in mind, Finley?"

"We're last resort when it comes to anything S.H.I.E.L.D. related unless it's world-threatening. Otherwise, we're left alone."

"How do I know you two aren't a flight risk? How do I know that you won't disappear off the grid one day?"

"We're not traitors. We just don't want to be so deep with secret S.H.I.E.L.D. things any longer."

"You think I'd be willing to let you two get what you want so easily?"

"Is there going to be a problem with this or not?" I ask rather irritably. I don't mean to get that tone to come out, it just does on accident.

"Why do you want this all of a sudden?"

"We have our reasons." My brows come together.

"Fine, I won't pry. However, you must be able to reach us if God forbid you two find yourselves in trouble. We'll make sure you get those devices."

He's agreeing with this. We're getting it. "Thank you," I say. "Director, there's one more thing that I want to ask. I'm sure you can help me. If not, Agent Hill probably can."

"If it's about Jessabelle—"

"Not even close, sir." I shake my head defiantly. "My parents have been under S.H.I.E.L.D.'s protection, Agent Hill confirmed that a while back. I'd like to have their location."

"So that's why you want this."

"Partially. So...my parents' location?"

It's Agent Hill who speaks: "I'll get right on that for you."

**Okay, let me easy all of your worries, dear readers. The worst is over. It's been over since chapter 43. I promise. I am not tricking you. The story is almost over. I am not going to torment you further. And please, even before this book is over, DO NOT ask for a sequel. This book has always been planned to be a stand-alone and nothing more.

I will have the tissues at the ready when you need them.

P.S. Enough the small ship video someone made for me! iliveintheclouds I truly love it. The song choice was perfect <3**