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9| Sentenced. 

"How can you let this happen Shiva? She is your only sister. Just a promise to someone and you are ready to abandon her?!" he refused to look at me. 

I found him peeking into Maya's room quietly, without letting her know I saw him caring for her silently without letting himself know about the fact that he still loves his sister. 

 "I promised to Nanna ji that I will never look at her if she disgraces our family name" He spoke.  

I stared his face for a few unbelievable moments. "I can't believe you are the same Shiva who could have died saving his only sister, who always stood firm with her against every odd. And today you have left her, abandon her in this storm to face it alone?!"

Shiva looked at my face, a little disbelief evident in his gaze; I never spoke in front of him, never questioned a thing in our 8 years of wedded life but this time I couldn't stop myself.

"Maya was the one who stood by my side when everybody else blamed me for us being childless, she fought for me, for us and here you are letting her fight the worst battle alone." Shiva looked away from my face, I held his hand. "I know you are equally hurt Shiva! Then why can't you feel her wounds? They are covered but she is still bleeding inside"

"My sister is dead Radha. Maya mrr gai mere liye...

"Aese naheen marr jatey log" I literally screamed and Shiva looked at my face but his stiff expressions softened as his gaze caught my tears. "Why don't you understand your sister is still alive and she needs your help, your support" I practically begged him to stop Nanna ji giving horrible decisions about his own granddaughter.

"I have supported her whole of her life Radha; fought for her, stood by her every time even when she was wrong, I always took her side, her stubbornness, her rowdiness every wish legal or not I supported her. But am tired now" he shook his head, he did look tired and weary. He looked helpless.

"or tumhen kia lagta hea k panchayat meri suney gi?! Nanna ji meri sunen ge?! If you think so you are wrong" he added, I saw his eyes turning bloodshot. "or wo bhi Maya ko le ker, they always blamed her even her existence was a sorry thing for all of them, they will never listen to me"

"So it means you won't even speak a word?"I asked in disbelief. He remained quiet.

"Ap Maya ko Dilli bhej dejiye. Moasi ji k pas" I suggested and he shook his head as if there was no chance of this.

"Mein ne kaha na tum se k....

"Shiva bhaiya! Shiva Bhaiya!" Shiva was in the middle of his statement when Khushal ran inside our room; he didn't even knock just barged; his face horrified and breaths ragged.

"Wo.. Wo Nana ji aaye hen Dev bhaiya k sath or.. or wo...

I looked at Shiva whose facial expressions were tensed and hands fisted at his sides, without another word or a question he marched out from the room. Khushal looked at me still worried.

"Nanna ji k sath baki panchayati bhi aaye hen or Dev bhaiya bhi, wok eh rahe hen k hum ne Maya diddi ko chupa ker rakha hua hea or wo faisla chahtey hen" Khushal informed me in urgent tone.

"Faisla?" my heart sank down.

Shiva

I could feel Sanchi's parents' pain. I could feel the pain and misery of every brother every father whose daughter had been stoned or whipped or hung to death just because of my decision in the panchayat. I could feel what they had gone through. 

"the decision would be the same for my granddaughter as of for anyone else. I will never discriminate or hesitate in taking my decision and you all know this" Nanna ji assured firmly, the people who were all once in my acquaintance, today looked strangers and distant.

Everyone wanted a sentence doesn't matter of justice or not. Deep down I knew what my sister's fate going to be and I knew I won't be able to stand against it, not this time. For me Maya was already dead; the misnomer that was put upon the name of family because of her was going to be labeled till the end of times and I knew I won't be able to wash the stain, not this time.

"Shiva!" Nanna ji addressed me, though with a very cross look at his face. "Call her here" he ordered and I gulped down the lump in my throat.

"He won't call her here Nanna ji! After all he is her brother; let me bring her" Dev spoke giving me a look, i saw disgust for me in his eyes. "I know he is hiding her" he added and step forward when I stopped him with my palm over his chest, where I knew there was no love or concern for Maya.

"My sister is already dead for me, she no more exists but justice DOES exist and YOU don't have to remind me about being unbiased because after all you were right, she is MY sister. So you better back off" my teeth gritted as I seethed, glaring a hidden warning towards him and he looked away with distaste.

"Nanna ji! I am not hiding her anywhere, why would I? I have never taken side of injustice and won't even take today; I will accept whatever your decision will be but..." I trailed off with a little hope in my heart.

Nanna ji got up and walked towards me. "Why? Why Shiva? You hated what she brought to you... she is dead for you then why? stop being a brother all the time, and think once about your reputation about the family name. Maya and her stubbornness has done enough damage to us already what do you want now? Even more?!" he exclaimed in disbelief and I looked down, my heart was throbbing inside.

"She has been raped and that even by some Muslim! How can Shiva still be taking her side and...

A man among the little crowd in my lounge spoke when my blood boiled in my veins and i literally jumped toward him "What do you mean by a Muslim han?! What do you mean by a Muslim? Pandit hota to tu apni behen ko khushi se de deta usey...

"Shiva!" Nanna ji grabbed my arm and pulled me back when I screamed at his face. My breathing was rough and I could feel air crashing through my nostrils in and out as I kept on glaring fire at the man.

"Shiva thandey damagh se socho, tum to us ka antimsaskar ker chukey ho mager Bhagwan ko moo to hum ne bhi dikhana hea" Munshi ji stated in a softer tone, every word pierced thorns in my ears.

"mein kia ker chuka hoon kia nahee ye mera or meri behen ka mamla hea. You stay out of it" I snapped and he shook his head.

"ye mamla tumhara mamla nai hea Shiva! Ye panchayat ka mamla hea or panchayat he faisla karey gi, wesey he jesey aj tak hota aya hea" Nanna ji announced this time a little more firmly, my elbow was still in his grip on to which he pressed harder and then jerked my arm off.

I was slowly breaking inside, nobody noticed, nobody knew.

"Maya didi! Please stay inside. Please why don't you listen!"

"Maya ander chalo tum, you are still not well" I heard Radha and Khushal up in the gallery and I felt my sister once again being herself; stubborn and insistent.

Every head was turned up and gaze following one point. I looked down as I heard the footsteps.

She was wearing those anklets like always, reminding me about Mom and how she loved them and how I gave them to Maya when she turned sixteen, as Mom's closest memory.

I wonder where Mom was at the moment, her soul looking down at us... must be grieving must be in remorse.

Maya walked towards us wearily, limping a little.

I looked at her from out of the hospital room through the little window in the door, couldn't even go closer I was afraid I would break the promise I did to myself, I was afraid once again the brother in me will succeed.

And now she was standing there right in front of my eyes. Maya, my little sister, my whole world that was ruined today. I wanted to look away from her face; tired and so unlike my Maya.

 "Maya didi ruk jaiye! Ap ko bhagwan ka wasta" Khushal begged at her side. 

"Mat do mujhy apne Bhagwan ka wasta" I heard her bursting up. "Us Bhagwan se mera koi taluq nai ho sakta jo apne bandon ko merta hua dekhta hea or phir in sab fojdaron ko bhej deta hea faisla sunane" she was fuming flames at Khushal who stood there helpless.

She then turned and looked at Nanna ji who was disapprovingly glaring back at her. I wonder if he could even look at her wounds! If he could even sense her pain! could he?

But why was I thinking about her pain? Didn't I abandon her already? Didn't I break every string every tie between us? Then why still am feeling bad for her? why I still want all this to be a nightmare...

"You know what Nanna ji, He was just like you!" she spat on his face and then looked at Munshi ji. "and like you!" and like all of you, every man standing here who has no guts to stop injustice and brutality but you all are mighty enough to stand in front of one helpless woman and sentence her to death! Wow! Nanna ji kitney bahadur hen ap!"

"BUS!!" Nanna ji yelled raising his palm up at her face aggressively.

"You were saving her, right? You called her your pride. You were so much obsessed in loving her Shiva that you even didn't care about your family name. Pandit Avinash ka putr ek din yun izzat matti mein milaye ga ye nai socha hoga kisi ne" nanna ji pointed his index in my chest as he snapped violently. I couldn't look up meeting so many eyes; they were all charging me, accusing me mujhy yad hea mein ne kaha tha k Maya ki taraf uthne wali her ungli pehley meri taraf ishara kerti hea.

"Stop accusing him" Maya screamed and to my horror she grabbed the index still poking my chest quite firmly and then jerked his hand off. Nanna ji stood there off guard at what she did, I was frozen in my place while Maya's eyes were red as fire and her breathing ragged.

"He is Shiva. Shiva Avinash Thukral. And you don't have to remind him about family integrity because it's not him who has ruined it, IT'S ME!" she screamed hysterically and then looked at the men. "Accuse me. Punish me. BUT DO NOT BLAME MY BROTHER" she added threateningly looking at the men.

The brother in me took a step forward "Maya bus ker. Tu...

But I had to stop when Maya looked at me, her eyes piercing into mine with sadness and complaint and my heart ached badly. "Hawan kund mein jhonk dene se rishtey nai jaltey Dada! Insaan jalta hea, dil jaltey hen. Rishtey waheen rehtey hen. Mein marr nai sakti ap k liye, marr ker bhi nai" tears flowing through her puffed blood shot eyes.

I was crying inside, screaming my heart out but not a single tear escaped my eye. I kept my promise.

I looked up, Radha was standing at the back with the pillar covering her mouth with her palm, I could see her tears and suppressed whimpers. "Radha! Take her inside"

"I won't go. I won't go until I hear these dead hearted people giving their decision" Maya stepped back as Radha stepped towards her. "Sunaiye fiasla. Ek bar phir apne mard honey ka saboot de dejiye Nanna ji!" Maya challenged him looking straight at his face.

"Maya chalo ander" Radha grabbed her arm which she tried to took off and my heart bled when I felt how weak she had become.

"You are even worse than Zamaan. Usey to shaid ek bar mein maf ker doon mager ap! Ap to jalen ge Narg ki aag mein...

"Maya Chup!!!" my hand flew in air slapping her face and Radha gasped loudly at her side as Maya's face hung to one side. "BUS! Ub ek or shabt nai. Ander ja!"

Maya stood straight back again, her eyes had disbelief and pain. I looked away from her face and the next moment Radha almost dragged her to wards the stairs.

Nanna ji was saying something in his usual rough and stiff tone, words crashing onto my ear drums but no sound reaching my brain.

I looked down at my aching palm in utmost disbelief and very quietly a small tear made its way out from my eye, dropping into the flames burning my hand.

The next day

Maya

I slowly limped towards the table at the far end of my room where small marble statue of Durga Maa was kept. Reaching near I picked it up in my hands, even the small statue felt heavy. It belonged to my mom.

"Even you are cold and insensitive. Sitting all Queen like with all this power which is of no use. No use at all! If you are that powerful why didn't you save me? Why?" a scream escape my throat as I held it tight in my grip.

I wanted to burn this whole world, I wanted to scream so much that my heart could burst out from my throat so that I could show them what they had done to me, to my body and to my soul. 

I stumped it back on the table when my gaze caught sight of the brown diary and once again pain scuttled in every inch of me.

"You lied!" tears were flowing down. "jhoot bola tha ap ne k apka beta buhat acha hea, jhoot bola tha k wo apka maan hea. dekha! Dekha kia kiya apk maan ne merey sath! Jhoot bolti hen ap! Jhoot bolti hen sab...

I wanted to accuse the whole damn world, I wanted to rip everything apart. Picking the diary up and fisting a tuft of pages I tore them out from the cover and then another and then another until I was left with a tattered leather cover in my hand which I threw somewhere in the room.

Falling down over my knees I cried my heart out, trying to let out all the pain screaming inside me. Pages remained scattered around me on the floor. 

I don't know how many tears I shed, how much pain I bared when I felt a hand over my shoulder. "Maya"

"Maya kuch kha le, medicine leni hea na" bhabi spoke softly as she kept my head in her lap and stroke my hair.

"Khila pila k maren ge. Wah! Barey dayaloo hen ap log" tear escaped my eye. 

My stitches hurt at the most sensitive places of my body, I felt they would burst open as I couldn't bare the pain anymore. 

"Maya aesa mat bol. Kuch nai hoga tujhey" her tone betrayed the uncertain words she spoke.

"And why have you done this? you tore the diary?" She was asking and I sniffled in her lap. 

Suddenly somebody knocked on the door and an unknown fear engulfed me from all sides. My soul shivered at the scariest thought. "Maya Didi!" it was Pali's voice and the next moment the door flung open. She hesitantly stepped in followed by Khushal and placed a tray laden with food on the small round table.

I pulled my head up from bhbai's lap and looked at Khushal who seemed tense and was looking at Pali as if was waiting for her to leave. She finally left and closed the door.

"Maya did!" Khushal looked at me. "Kia bat hea Khushal?" Bhabi inquired looking at his perplexed expressions.

"Wo koi aaya hea neechey, bol ra hea Shiva bhaiya se milna hea" Khushal stated looking at Bhabi and then looked down at me as I asked. "Kon?"

"Shehryar"

 ....

Poor Shiva :( I feel bad for him😞

Anyways how was the chapter?🙈🙊🙉

And Shehryar in Kashmir👍 or 👎

what do you think going to happen next?????

Inn Shaa Allah next will be quick :)

Till then SMILE :)😆