Assalam-o-Alaikum!

Guys this part got deleted, so I have published again.This is the same last chapter of the story. 

****This is not edited or revised so expect a lot of blunders and errors****

46| Redemption 

Ayesha

It's the fear that stops us; fear of rejection fear of being thrown away and fear of being never loved again the same way. And those who never fear never lose, people who have....

"Ayesha!" my room being knocked and the book literally jumped up in my hands, I looked in the direction and found the door pushing asidei quickly kept the book under my quilt and flashed a smile towardsmy idiot sister who had no sense of privacy.

"Guess what!" I could feel hear breaths heavy and eyes gleaming with excitement.

"What?" I shrugged and she rolled her eyes.

"Daddy is preparing BBQ"

"Oh! Wow sounds good to my tummy" I smiled but I felt there was more to her news report this evening.

"And......?" I urged her to speak.

"Chachi aai hen hum se milne" she informed and for a moment I couldn't believe my ears. Wasn't he suppose to leave? And she came plopped down in the bed near my feet. "I couldn't believe my eyes Ayesha, I thought she would never come and she is beautiful I mean how could anyone....

"Okay okay calm your pants, am coing down to witness this box of excitement" I tried to shoo her away and she smiled, getting up.

"Jaldi aana" she instructed while shutting the door at her back, I heaved up a sigh resting my head with the bed crown. And here I was, thinking he had left and there is peace in my life now.

I pulled out the bbok again, got up from the bed and just tried to complete the passage I left when Fatima came when the door got knocked again and before I could respond it pulled open. I quickly turned keeping the book at my back coming face to face with him.

"you know what there is a thing called as privacy and something also known as mannars exist in the world, I hope these words aren't new to your ears or brains, if you have any, yeah?" I faked a big smile and he rolled his eyes with the soft smile never leaving the corner of his lips. Why he had to behave all happy-go-lucky all the time.

"wesey to apki zaban shahra-e-kurakuram jitni lambi hea mager derwazey per kharey bandey ko yes kehty huye death waqiya hone lagti hea ap ko" he walked inside, the door got shut at his back. "bhaley banda derwazey per khara sookh ker kanta ho jaye"

"Yeah really?" I rolled my eyes. "I wonder when will you stop talking garbage dear cousin!"

"Dear... aye haye! I like the sound of it" he rubbed his hand over his stubble in a creepy way as he smiled. Disgusting!

"you should get out you know" I pointed at the door at his back and his gaze lowered, a smile appeared on his face not the creepy one though and I realized I was holding his book. Shitt! Here we go!

"oh so I actually disturbed you in the middle fo your quality reading yeah? Am sorry but which book is this can I have a lo...

"No" I pulled the book back as he tried to take it from me. "you can not. Now leave"

"I thought you do not read books" he said anyways.

"I do" I countered. I lied

"but when I suggested you to read my books you refused" he pouted.

"I don't read ammatures" I chuckled and he raised his eyebrow. Again I must have said something amusing to his ears I guess. He smiled softly before he leaned in, I could smell his scent and I could tell he had a good taste in cologne. Bfore I could stop him, he effortlessly pulled the book from my hand, I kept at my back.

"Haider kia badtameezi hai, wapas karo meri kitab or jao bahir" I literally screamed at his face, he mockingly made a face keeping his index in his ear.

"tumhari kitab? Acha ji!" he smirked down at the book. "The Shadows Behind by non other than the most handsome and brilliant writer on the face of earth Haider Hussain!" he announced, embarrassing me and then opened the bbok where I kept the book mark.

He was about to read when I pulled the book back from his hands. "before you cross your limits, get out from my room!" and threw the book in my bed.

He smield and crossed his arms at his front, testing my patience. "you know what this is your issue Ayesha you hide things"

"What! I hide things? And from whom? You? Oh God! Wow! Amazing assumption Mr. I-know-Everything!" I mocked but he still had that smile. Getting on my nerves. Dafa q nai ho jata yea?

"nah! I don't know everything but yes I know you! and I know that Ayesha Shehryar hides stuff and in all these years she has become a pro at hiding, keeping a bloody mask on her face, showing the whole world what she is actually...not" he shrugged at the end, I didn't react maybe because a part of me knew he was right.

I looked away from his face crossing my arms. "I just asked for a good read from fati and she gave me this, I didn't even know you were the writer plus I dunno why she even gave em this... not a good read anyways" I shrugged and tried to shoo away the topic.

"yeah its definitely not a very good read, too many loopholes I guess; plot was shaky in the middle, plus a bunch of stupid characters and a very cliché theme. It was one of my earliest works and I wasn't even sure I wanted to publish or not but my idiot friends pushed me for that so.....yes, not a good read. I take your review as authentic Madam!" I looked at him he seemed serious, no mock no fun as he tilted his head like some Shakespearean hero and I couldn't help but smile a little. I knew he was only doing it to ease away my embarrassment.

"don't you feel embarrassed? Vomiting garbage about your own book!"

"nops! Because am not afaraid of it" he mentioned and suddenly it reminded me of his words written in the book. "I am not afraid of accepting my mistakes or the damages I have done or what I want inside" he added and I raised my brow questioningly.

"Am leaving tonight" he informed, and I saw the little grim shadow lingered across his face and though I already knew he was leaving.... It didn't sound good at the moment.

"I know" I could only say that.

"I met taai outside, she seemed happy. Am glad you all have accepted her wholeheartedly. She is an amazing lady I think" he said and I smiled nodding in agreement.

"I won't disagree. She is"

I saw he hesitated for a moment, scratching his head then spoke. "You know you should stop calling her aunty, I mean give it a try" he uttered and I blinked my eyes, I couldn't believe he just said what I have been thinking for alst so many days. I stared his face in surprise.

"Dekho mein samajh sakta hoon, Abbu was away all that time but trust me when I called him Abbu that day in hospital I was happy but he... I cant explain what I saw in his eyes Ayesha; acceptance and aknowledgement and love and belongingness I mean there was so much and what came out just a tear... of happiness and surprise, good surprise" while he blabbered looking somewhere in the space I noticed his smile changed, turned into even beautiful.

"intizar siraf mein ne nai kiya tha, Abbu had waited for all those years to hear me calling him his father and same is with Taai, she must have waited for this moment too Ayesha. Give it to her, its her right"

"H-how did you get to know that......" I stopped when he chuckled.

"I told ya girl! You hide things but no matter how pro you are at this...." He leane din a little looking straight into my eyes. "Am a good reader and I can read it there" with his index he made a circle in front of my face.

He pulled back. "So I knew there was tie of votes between your heart and mind so here, you can take my vote and let your heart win over this machine here" he poked my temple and I smiled.

He smiled with a wink and mine faded, disappeared as I felt something I shouldn't have felt in my heart. I looked away from his face gulping a lump down my throat.

"Mein chalta hoon, got to help taya" he turned and left the room. I heaved up a sigh and almost fell down in the bed shutting my eyes when they fluttered open again as I heard the door got opened again, I turned my head and found his stupid face poking inside.

"By the way the book has a stupid end, the girl will die in the last chapter" he flashed a huge idiotic grin.

"Haider k bachey you mororn!" I jumped down the bed but but he was gpone already. "What the hell!! Aesey kon kerta hea" I screamed in utmost frustration and felt like throaing the book in his face.

Haider

I was still upset over what Ammi had said to Abbu in the hotel but I was glad she could come and pay a goodbye pplus hello! Visit to taya taai and Maha phupo, they deserved that. I mean, they had nothing to do with whatever happened between my parents so they should be treated as shitt or got ignored.

Ammi sat in the lawn with Taai and Phupo while Taya and we kids prepared the bbq, well taya prepared we just stood and annoyed him. And Abu... well, I hadn't seen him around he was in his room I guess.

"putter ji! Mere kolon super chitter na kha leen" I heard taya talking to the chiken piece just about to get dropped in the coal but he saved in time. I chuckled.

"it seems you are too good at this taya" I admired and he smiled.

"am the best son!" he bosted andthen laughed, I smiled nodding.

"daddy cooks well, he has got the best taste in his hands" Fatima added.

"really? Wow!"

"Acha taya tell me how was Abbu when he was young? I mean really young" I asked curiously and taya made a face.

"o putter ji tussi koi karan di gal karo, ae swal e ghalat ae." He said and I chuckeld frowning. "Your father was never young, wo sala paida he budha hua tha" he shook his head mentioning. "always serious, always sober"

"Always sober? Why don't you ask Ammi" I remarked and taya laughed throwing his head back and nodded.

"You are right, Maya would better tell us how was Hussain"

He oiled the chicken before we walked up to the sofas. "I wish you stayed here for more Haider" taya said and I looked sown at the grass under my feet.

"I wanted to taya but Ammi needs me there, pehly Ram tha mager wo bhi job k liye Canada jar aha hea or wesey bhi Ammi meri zimeedari hen Ram ki naheen so I guess leaving is the only option left" I pressed a forced smile and he nodded, patting my shoulder.

I could read in his face what he couldn't utter in words. "taya Abbu has given too mnay years to his business and this place I can not ask him to turn away from everything and come with us and Ammi.... The life she is living was forced upon her, it was a hell and she made it her heaven it took her 25 years to become what she is today. Mujhey, Abbu ko ya kisi ko bhi koi haq nai unhen ye kehne ka k wo sab kuch chor ker yahan chali aaen. Mein khudgherz nai ho sakta taya" I looked down at my hands, placed in my lap. There was silence for a while.

He reahed for my hand and held it, I looked up towards his face and found his eyes moistened. "Maya must be very proud of you Haider, you are the son every parent deserve. Allah tumhen duniya jahan ki kabiyabi or khushiyan de. Ameen" he said and I smiled hugging him.

Hugging him was so like hugging Abbu. Ammi was right these both were so alike.

Hussain

"Mein aander aa jaoun Abbu?" I looked up from the book and found him standing in the doorframe, hesitant, shy. Pulling down my reading glasses I called him in. "Come in" he walked inside, his gaze roamed around in the room still hesitant.

"Ap bahir nai aaen ge?" he asked. There was hope in his eyes, I smiled and patted the empty space in the bed asking him to sit down. He came and took the place.

"I was about to come bus ye ek column perhne lag gaya tha to time ka pata he nai chala" I said and he softly smiled down at the book.

"political columns" he stated looking at the book and I nodded.

"Suitable for my age, I cant read lovestories now" I remarked and he made sad face. I wonder why?!

"Then you will hate my books" he shook his head, still looking down and for a moment I couldn't understand.

"your books?"

"I write Abbu" he explained and the frown faded. "I never knew you wanted to be a writer too, when I was done chalking out my first plot I shared it with Ammi. I still remember Abbu she couldn't respond for a good ten minutes just wept, mein darr gaya tha shaid mein ne apni story se Ammi ko hurt ker diya but then she told me that you wanted to be a writer too. I felt so proud of myself" he smiled shyly at the end and I smiled back, holding his hand.

"I am proud of you too my son" I said and she smiled. "so how far have you gone in writing?"

"5 published and two am working on" Haider told me and to be honest I was surprised.

"Wow MashaAllah! Sounds amazing. My son is already a famous writer" I remarked and he chuckled, shaking his head.

"Not that famous" he pressed a coy smile.

"jab aadmi apna khuwab poora kerta hea na Haider to usey buhat khushi hoti hea mager jab woi admi baap banta hea or uska beta us k adhoory khuwab poorey kerta hea to khushi mukamal ho jati hea, ye ahsas kitna khoobsurat hea mein tumhen bata nai sakta beta. Thank you very much" merey samney Haider nai mera khud ka maazi betha tha, yun laga Hussain jawan ho gaya ho phir se.

"Your dreams are mine Abbu, am glad I could do something which you wanted to do"

I smiled and patted my hand over his. "Haider am happy that you are going with your mother, you have taken the right decision son"

"I don't know its right or wrong Abbu, its true that I have found you after long and I want to live the rest of my life with you but Ammi ko chor dena was never in my mind, I couldnt believe she could even think like this" he seemed glum all at once.

"she thought it was best for you beta"

"I dunno maybe" she shrugged and then smiled, "chaliye bahir aa jaiye jaldi se, we are leaving in an hour" he got up from the bed. "and world famous bbq is ready by the ever green Shehry taya and the most handsome Haider Hussain. You should never miss that Abbu" he cliked his tongue at the end and I swear his smile.... My son had the most beautiful smile.

I smiled back and got up, keeping the book on the side table. "Tum chalo mein abhi aya" he nodded and left the room.

Fatima

"And I have a few cases, I think I will leave before Shehryar" New mummy wasn't like my mummy but yes she was sweet and by the amount of care she had taken of dady I could say she loved him and they were happy together.

"Bhabi you should stay, abhi aaye huye kitne he din huye hen ap ko" Aani remarked but she helplessly smiled, I noticed chachi spoke less but she seemed comfortable among all of them as if she was always here with all of us.

"I wish I could irada to mera yehi tha k in k sath he wapas jaoon mager dekhiye jo Allah ko manzoor ho" she replied.

Hussain Chachoo was clearly avoiding any direct conversation with chachi but looking at them together for the first time was overwhelming. The sight was beautifully sad in a strange way I wanted them to be together forever.

"Haider or Ayesha kahan reh gaye?" daddy asked, looking around and I got up.

"They were over the grill, lemme check" I told them before leaving.

"Maya how is your hospital going?" I heard Aani asking as I left the hall room and stepped into out back yard where them both were expected.

Ayesha

"and what exactly are you trying to imply?" Haider looked at me inquiringly. I kept the oil can over the grill to pick it up later and crossed my arms.

"Am trying to tell you that my sister likes you a lot so you better not hurt her feelings or...

"Wait wait wait! One minute" he frowned stopping me. "I know she likes me, we are very grood friends afterall but where has this don't-hurt-her-feelings come?" he asked in confusion and I rolled my eyes.

"You clearly know what I mean haider, she likes you as in... more than liking you know" I tried to clear, he could be annoying at times.

"She likes me as a friend, a cousin and she admires me as a fan but this more than liking wali bat is a little too much, bachi hai wo"

"Bachi" I chuckled in disbelief. "bachi nai hea wo Haider, she lov...

"Oh please!" he cut me through. "I really like her, she is that bubbly girl who always puts a smile to your face and cares for you. I love her the way she is but I have never thought about her that way"

"so it means you are going to break her heart? Haider this isn't fair. I always felt that you two are into eachother." I disapprovingly glared him on to which he narrowed his gaze a me, as if he was thinking something and then the frown faded from his forehead.

"And I always thought that you were into me" the way he said I gawked his face for a minute but then realized he was being sarcastic.

"hansna tha? Hahaha very funny, it was hilarious" I faked a laugh and he rolled his eyes.

"you know what you all are pathetic, everybody" Haider shook his head, looking at the flame in the grill and I frowned in confusion.

"Care to explain?"

"Everybody here is using me in his or her own way, Haider is somebody everyone wants but what I want is like.... Last bothered" he looked at me, he seemed serious. "wahan Ammi Abu hen, ready to sacrifice me for eachotehr and yahan do behnen, one who has never loved the other and always given her the shitty atitiude is now making sure that Haider Hussain saves her boat. You actually want to present me as a sisterly gift to your little baby sister. Wow!"

"Am not getting your point Haider. Am not sacrificing you"

"Yeah! I know. I know you don't have to be guilty" he waved his hand hushing me and turned his attention towards the fire. He seemed hurt and I didn't like it.

"Tum ghalat samajh rae ho Haider" I tried to explain but he wasn't listening.

"brush" he asked for the brus I was holding, I gave it to him and before I could stop him he reached for the oil can I kept on the gril, with in a spur of a moment my brain alarmed me it was damn hot and he was about to hold it.

"Haider stop!" and before he could reach for the can without thinking least I moved the can aside. "Shitt!" it dropped down on the grass leaving my fingers burnt with the hot oil.

"Ayesha watch out!" Haider panicked the moment he saw my hand in the oil, shivering in unbearable pain. Tears started to ozze out and I couldn't stop them.

"Ayesha!"I heard fatima's voice behind me, and I turned. "What the hell! Ye kia kya"

"I will bring ointment" Haider ran inside, Fatima was looking down at my red swollen fingers with teary eyes.

"You knew it was hot stupid" she complained and I tried to press a smile but failed, tears were still there and the pain was acute.

"I dunno it was just...." I stopped in the middle, unable to understand what to say I could find her gaze intense and confused on my face.

"Its okay, theek ho jaye ga yar its just a little heat" I tried to press a smile but she remained quiet. In fact she was quiet more than usual

Fatima

"Here" I was blowing over her bruise when Haider came running in the back yard, he was holding a potato in his hand. "It works" he grabbed Ayesha's hand from my grip and started rubbing the half cut piece of potato over her palm. Ayesha winced a little, Haider glanced up at her face and then leaning in he blew over the burnt spot.

"Haider its fine now"

"Am sorry, I just...." He blabbered as if he wasn't listening to Ayesha. "I knew it was hot, pata nai kahan tha mera damagh" he sounded sorry.

"you shouldn't have done this" he looked up and stated and she rolled her eyes.

"Its okay Haider, its no big deal" Ayesha tried to stop him but he just rubbed the potato over her fingers , there was so much concern in his eyes as he did so; maybe more than just concern it was pain as if he was feelings hers.

Was I missing something? Haider said Ayesha was sacrificing him... for me? There is something wrong... terribly wrong.

"Fatima!" I felt my shoulder being nudged, I jumped pout from the train of thoughts. "Earth to girl! Kahan kho gaeen?" Ayesha was asking and I couldn't reply.

"Nothing I was just..." I shook the thoughts away and smiled. "How is it?" I looked down at her palm, red and swollen.

"its better" she assured me. I looked at Haider who was standing there still looking down at her palm with regret and sorry on his face.

"I think ointment lagani chaiye, lemme bring it" he thought aloud and before Ayesha could stop him he marched inside.

"Pagal ho gaya hea lerka" she shook her head. "Come on lets call it for dinner, I think its ready"

"Ayesha ek bat poochoon?" I asked ignoring her statement, she looked up and frowned then nodded.

"Is there something you are hiding?" I asked and she chuckled a little.

"What?"

I held her other hand in mine, she smiled in between the frown. "Ayesha never think that you have ill treated me ever in life, I know you have always cared for me, protected me I could always feel the shield around me because I knew you were always there. No matter in what form in what way but you did care like a big sister"

"Ohkay! Am glad you feel so girl but... why now?" she frowned confused.

"I dunno I just want you to know that I love you and I would hate it if I'd ever come to know that my only sister is holding back on something beause of me" I said and she atonce pulled her hand out from my grip.

"What are you talking about Fatima?" she looked at the grill and adjust the flame. "aese q keh rai ho yar?"

"kun k cheezen sacrifice ki jati hen insaan or rishty nai Ayesha" I replied and she just stared my face unable to say anything.

"lemme call them for dinner" I smiled and walked past her.

Slowly all the pieces were joining together, the pzzle I couldn't understand was solving it self; I was hating myseof for not knowing that my rowdy, unruly sister was changing... ever since she met him. she came back from Pakistan as a new Ayesha, what happened to her I had never thought before but now I could see that, I could feel the reason behind the change.

Haider k kehne per Ayesha ne buhat kuch badla tha; chachoo se behavior, rishton ki importance, accepting new mummy and so much more.

Kash Haider pehley mil gaya hota Ayesha ko.

Haider

"and what is this?" I looked at the little sleek wrapped up box in my hand.

"its called as a gift boy" Fatima bosted and I chuckled. I unwrapped the gift and came face to face with a frame, with two smiling faces mine and hers. "Advance happy birthday" she added and I looked up at her face, her smile had a grim in it.

"Girl how did you get to know?" I was mazed. "plus this is beautiful, an amazing memor. I love it" I genuinely smile, I could see the glint in her eyes in the middle of that smile.

"dekha? Isey kehty hen dosti" I tilted my head and looked at Ayesha who was silently sipping her coffee. I saw her rolloing her eyes. "Banda wish he ker deta hea, if you are too miser for a gift" I heard Fatima giggled.

"mujhy koi shok nai hea duniya jahan ki salgira yad rakhne ka" Ayesha countered.

"am going to keep it with me forever. Thank you so much for this" I smiled down at the frame and then up at Fatima who smiled back and then got up.

"acha abhi to nai ja rahe ho na? I mean nikalne mein kitna time hea?" she asked. I looked down at my wrist watch.

"half hour probably"

"okay, I will be right back. Mujhy chachi se kuch bat ker ni hea" she announced and I nodded, keeping the frame on the table. Fatima stopped near Ayesha, looked down at her then back at me. A smile appeared on her face.

"Ayesha zara khari hona" she asked her and Ayesha frowned, then shrugging she got up. Fatima came back to me, held my hand and got me up. "Yahan aana" she called Ayesha who frowned even harder and refused to move even an inch.

"tch! Aao to yar" Fatima grabbed her hand and pulled her making her stand with me. I looked at her doing all this in confusion.

She looked at both of us with usch metramonial eyes I swear. "hmm. You two definitely look good together"

"What the hell!?" Ayesha blurted out while she just squealed excitedly and left the room. I stood there surprised at what just happened.

"tum ne kuch kaha Fatima ko?" she looked at me grumpily and I heaved up a helpless sigh.

"Why you always try to catch me as a culprit?" I asked, she jerk her head and was about to leave when I grabbed her wrist stopping her in her place.

"What?" she inquired.

"want to ask something?" I said.

"bakwas karo" she said annoyed.

"why did you burn your hand for me?" I asked and for a moment her expressions changed, she remained quiet but then countred.

"For you? Excuse me! Why would I burn anything for you? My hand got burnt because of you idiot!" she snapped and I smiled for some unknown stupid reason. "only of you acted more present mndedly and had seen where your hand was going my hand would be safe and sound at the moment but you are such an.... What??? Why are you grinning like an idiot?" she asked, stopping in the middle of her rant and I shook my head.

"Nothing I was just thinking something"

"Care to share?"

"I was thinking that you aren't that of a Hitler as you try to show to the world" I said and she frowned. Her wrist still in my grip.

"yeah really? Wow! Thank you so much you found out, agar tum nai batatey mein to marr jati" she totally faked a cute smile and I laughed at her expressions.

"maren tumharey dushman" I cheesed and she rolled her eyes.

"hath choro mera" she ordered. I looked down, slipped my hand from her wrist and held her hand firm when I looked up she was as expected frowning.

"tell me you will visit Kashmir" I said, I was leaving her sity and I knew the next visit wasn't any time soon.

"mein q aaoon gi Kashmir?" she asked.

"Tumhen jannat dikhaaoon ga"

"mujhy nai dekhni jannat, tumhi dekho"

"tumharey baghair dekhoon ga to haseen nail age gi" I blurted out and she gawked my face until I burst into a gwaf and she shook her head.

"You can be a cheesy kinky flirt, and here my sweet little sister thinks so high and sophisticated of you. Gosh! You are so cheap like a third class hero of some B grade bollywood movie" she remarked, I stopped laughing.

"talking of Fatima.... Idher aao zara"

"What are you doing Haider. Stop it"I pulled her along with me to the rare wall of the room, ignoring her protest and made her stand in front of the mirror.

"hmm she was right. We do look good together yeah" I stated looking at our reflection in the mirror, she went quiet for a moment as if was actually thinking or agreeing with me or maybe just looking at us in the mirror.

"what do you think han?" I asked elbowing her and found just a little teeny weeny smile at the corner of her lips but she ignored that.

"I think you should better stop flirting and leave before you miss your flight and then we will have to bare you for some more time" she rolled her eyes and walked away to the door.

"Acha gift to do gi na Birthday ka?" I called after herr.

"Will think" she replied and stepped out of the room.

"I want a signature Parker. Limited edition" I called back louder but this time didn't get a reply.

Huhn! Kanjoos!

It was true I loved being here with them, with Abbu and Fatima and Ayesha though she was hot headed and a little too much of a drama but still I culdn handle. Two moths passed like just a few days, pata he nai chala waqt kab kesey guzer gaya or mein aadi ho gaya in sab ka. Now I have to leave and leaving was difficult. I wish I could stay with them with Abbu and Ammi. I wish I could make them stay together but it seemed impossible.

I looked back in the mirror, smiled and shook my head jerking the thoughts away I turned and left the room.

Maya

"Ap sab ko aana chaiye Kashmir maybe just for a change" I said, as me and Haider stodd there in the doorway to leave. Shehry nodded his head in agreement.

"Kisi ko nai to Hussain ko to zaroor jana chaiye" he remarked keeping a straight serious face and I saw the color in Hussian's face changed, he glanced up at me and then averted his gaze.

"You all should come" I smiled.

I was not 18 years old neither was he, time had taught me enough, circumstances had changed me enough. I was Mominah, and had left behind Maya long ago. When I came to meet them they were expecting Maya, the expected me to be the same I was 25 years back only if they knew what Maya had gone through all those years... all that had turned Maya into Mominah who was independent, who had stopped crying for relationships and forgotten her past wrapping it up forever.

I felt bad for Shehry but I was glad he could found happness even after the hard times he faced in life and it pained when I looked at Maha but then again she was right; marrying again is not always the right option, sometimes you want to live for your first love doesn't matter it has gone far away from your life, sometimes you want to live and die for that one man whom you truly loved. Maha was right.... Maya felt the same.

"Abhi to mili theen dobara,or abhi he wapas ja rai hen ap, it hurts" I heard Maha statting in between tears as we hugged, I patted her head.

"it does Maha, it truly does" I said and she ulled back, tears soaking her face. I wiped them and smiled in between my own thumping heartbeats. "but its so good to see you all again, I never thought I will meet you people again but am glad Haider found you all" I added and she smiled, another tears escaped and she embraced me once again sobbing over my shoulder this time.

"I will drop you people to the airport" I heard hussian announcing as we pulled apart. I felt every eye settled on him for a moment but he ignored and walked out with Haider talking about something I couldn't get.

I walked out and found Hussian standing with his car, talking to Haider. I stopped there for a moment; two most important and dearly loved men of my life, my husband and my son. Kitny khoobsurat hoty hen ye rishty mager utney he nazuk bhi, zara si chot se chikna choor ho jaty hen.

They were so alike, same face same features, same smile. And thinking this unknowingly I had smiled. "Haider mein tumhari perwarish dikhti hea Maya" I heard Shehry speaking and I quickly wiped the moisture from the corner of my eyes. "Allah tum jesi maa her betey ko dey" he added and I looked at him smiling.

"take care of yourself" he patted my head and so many memories stood alive in front of my eyes, I felt if I will stand there a moment more I will cry. With hardly pressing a smile I walked ahead leaving him behind and without a word, I opened the back door and sat inside letting the tears fall in darkness.

Hussain

Getting out from the car I opened the boot and Haider took out the luggage we had collected from the hotel on out way. "I will get the trolley" Haider said and jogged ahead, I noticed there was a trolley quiet near to our car but he went for the distant one.

"tumhen khamakhamein takleef hui hum aa jaty khud he" I could sense the discomfort in her tone, the glum and the misture hidden in the words. I looked at her face.

Kal jo buhat sukoon se alvida keh rahi thi aj kitni besukooni or kitna afsos tha us k lehjey mein.

"I wish Haider had stopped and stayed with you here"

"Kabhi kabhi zid per arr jata hea, kisi ki nai sunta" She spoke, and waited for me to reply but I didn't. finally after a few silent moments she looked up at my face and I found her eyes bloodshot.

We stood there with our gaze fixated on eachother's face.

"tumhen apno ko jatey dekhna acha lagta hea kia?" she asked and a painful smile reached onto my lips. "Alvida kehna to buhat mushkil hota hea Hussian, tum itni himmat kahan se le aaty ho apne ander?" she was frowning.

I wanted to say a lot but I decided not to. I saw haider slowly approaching us. "Apna khayal rakhna"

She smiled sarcasm touching her lips. "at least this time you could say this much, this time you didn't stand far and wached me leaving. Good. Thank you Hussain" and a tear escaped her eye, I gulped down.

Haider stopped near us, he looked in between us a little question in his eyes.

"this time you are not leaving alone, you are leaving with your son and I know he will take care of you" How bogus and lame my words could sound... no more than they already did.

I tried to pick up the wheeler when Haider stopped me and picked that up, he placed all of them on the trolley all that time I could sense Maya's gaze upon my face and I couldn't face hers.

"Whatever we do; good or bad, at the end of it redemption is all we need Hussain and after redemption there is peace and calm, I pray you have it in your life now." She said and I looked at her. There were a few silent moments.

"Allah hafiz" she said and walked past us, I looked intot he direction she had gone till the moment she got disappeared in the crowd. My head hung low and heart felt heavy.

"Apna khayal rakhiye ga Abbu" I heard him saying and then I felt his hands over my shoulders. I felt weak. "And I will soon visit you back okay" I nodded as he said, assuring me like you assure a kid of your soon return. I looked up and found tears in his eyes.

He pulled me in for an embrace and I hugged him back with all I had. I loved him, I loved my son and I couldn't watch him leaving. It was painful, it was hurting me. I cried over his shoulder, not caring people would watch or they would talk. Or maybe no one would because for airports these things were normal; tears and sobs but for me nothing was normal.

We pulled part, he wiped my face with his sleeve and I tried to smile. "khayal rakhna apni maa ka" I said. He nodded obeying.

"Allah hafiz" and with that I turned to leave, with no looking back. Sat in the car and pulled it out from the parking.

Sometimes redemption is all we need, and after that we have peace and calm but do we always have it? No, I had no peace and I had no calm even after I was forgiven.... Maybe because I did not want redemption maybe I wanted Maya and I wanted Haider... I wanted my family back in my life. And without them there was no peace, no calm.

~~THE END~~