quatre // first kisses

:: Kaylin ::

I don't know what came over me, he kissed me, Tommen, Prince Tommen, the boy I was to marry. And I left. I freaked out and instead of doing the one thing I was meant to do, the one thing I wanted to do, I sprinted off into parts of the castle I don't know. I should've stayed there, done my duty. I know that we were starting to act like we were supposed to, and I got scared and I ruined it. I don't know where I was running to, but I didn't stop. My mind was racing and so were my feet. I ran all the way down the stairs, past countless servants and handmaidens sneaking a look back at the young lady from Highgarden rush to get away from her future.

The route to the cellar took me along a dim passageway that continued for several hundred feet then flowed out into a large room. The dragon cellar, they called it. I was where King Robert hid all 46 of the dragons that the targaryens rode during their reign when he won the throne. Where he hid evidence of the past, evidence that the man that stole his beloved away from him. Many said that the skulls reminded him of his lost love in Lyanna Stark. Each of them different sizes, they started at the far end of the room. The largest of which stood at the end of the room, , , and , the legendary dragons that conquered the Seven Kingdoms. All three were large enough for me to stand between their jaws. I imagined the power and might of the dragons, free to roam wherever they pleased, do what they want, be who they want. I wanted to be like them. Free. Independent. Instead, I was hiding from my betrothed in a forbidden room in the cellar of my future home.

As I stood there, examining the skulls of the great beasts, I heard footsteps coming down the cobblestone passageway. I panicked and ran quickly to hide behind one of the large skulls, afraid of who it might be that was quickly descending down the steps into the cellar.

Once hidden, I turned my head and peeked my eyes out from the top of the skull to look at the door. Tommen arrived, standing there, his gold hair glistening in the firelight, his blue eyes panicked. He was out of breath and flustered. "Kaylin." He shouted, his eyes searching the room for me. I saw the look of panic on his face and debated for a while. Getting no response, he moved past me and into the next room. I made up my mind and as I started to stand up, as my head passed the top of the skull, I saw him clearer, turned away from me, searching the adjoining chamber.

I stood, to sneak off to another part of the castle, hide away from the boy who had taken my first kiss, when I stepped backwards and knocked my head on a tooth of the dragon's mouth. Crying out in pain and rubbing the back of my head, an egg already forming, I heard him re-enter the room.

"Kaylin" He yelled, running over to me. I looked down at my knees, sitting on the ground, averting his eyes. He placed his hand underneath my chin and pulled my face to look at him. He looked so concerned, with worry in his face. "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have done that, you weren't ready." He apologised. I nodded my head softly, still avoiding his piercing blue eyes. He stood, and extended his hand for me to take. I shyly grabbed it and he pulled me towards him to stand, not before I tripped on my long dress, stumbling into his chest. I quickly stepped back, looking down in embarrassment.

"Sorry, I'm sort of clumsy" I mumbled. He said nothing in response, instead, he gently tugged at my arm, allowing me to follow him through the archway to the stairs. "We can go and get that head of yours checked, you may be concussed."

I knew that I had to continue with my father's wishes, for Margaery to marry Tommen, despite the king's command for us to marry, despite my feelings. I couldn't leave him confused after our 'kiss'. As I trailed behind him I started to pick up speed, his blue eyes dilated. Once we reached the third floor infirmary, he pulled me inside and requested for a nurse. One came bustling out, and after closely inspecting my head for what seemed like years, she decided all I needed was bed rest and some peace and quiet. I agreed, thankful for the excuse to escape the busy movement of the Red Keep.

After the nurse left the room, I looked at Tommen, he looked at me. He hesitated before saying quietly, "Can we talk about today? Somewhere private" I agreed, but requested that we talked later. He approved and slotted himself between my legs, as I was sitting on a cushioned bed, pulling me into his body for a hug. Despite my elevated position, his head was still a fair distance above the top of mine. I could hear the subtle sound of his heart beat. It was racing, just like mine.

I pulled away slightly, my arms still around his waist, but looser than before. I looked up at him, and at this close proximity I could see every finite detail in his face, the freckles that lightly covered his nose, the flecks of green in his icy eyes, the way the light glinted off of his golden hair. But, somehow, I was still panicked, "Tommen, I..." He looked down at me, blonde hair hanging over his eyes. He tucked a loose piece of my chestnut hair behind my ear and my eyes shifted, I was unable to look him in the face.

"My sister is the one that's supposed to marry you, not me, but it doesn't matter because I have no feelings and whatever that kiss was, we- we should just pretend it never happened." I said breathlessly. He pulled me in again, I fought against. His chin rested on my head and his arms were wrapped tightly around my waist holding me in place.

Silently, we exited the infirmary, his hand once again pulling me along the passageway and up the stairs, to what I assumed was the North Tower; the royal quarters. I was still struggling against his grip, I didn't want to give into the temptation, but his strong arm held my grip tightly, that was, until we literally collided with my sister as we turned corner.

Margaery looked at Tommen with shock, but regained her composure quickly and batted her long lashes, reaching out, touching his arm. "Oh, Prince Tommen my sweet, how are you? You look splendid, gold is really your colour. Oh and you're with my darling Kaylin" she glanced down at me, and the ice pressed to my head "looking after her?" She said, confused as to why Tommen would chose to spend time with me He smiled at her kindly and said; "Lady Margaery, how wonderful it is to see you today. Yes, Kaylin has had an accident, I was just showing her the castle, when her clumsy self tripped on her gown and knocked her head" He said kindly, looking down at me.

Margaery forced a giggle, glaring down at me. "Oh my sister, ever the clutz." she laughed. Tommen laughed forcibly with her. Tommen agreed before explaining my recovery and the bed rest commanded by the nurse and wishing her goodbye. Realising that she had an opportunity, she curtsied, but bent her back lower, so that her low cut dress fell forwards and revealed the top of her breasts slightly.

As we turned away, I saw him glance quickly at her exposed chest, realising this, I tried to tug my hand out of his grip, failing. Instead, he gripped my hand tighter, squeezing. He looked back at me, with apology in his eyes. Despite this, I slipped away, but not before I heard Margaery say

"Come see me in my chambers my prince, I can show you more of what's underneath this dress."

Hearing this, I got angry, angry that my family did not even consider my feelings of this betrothal. I fastened my pace up the stairs until I reached our family quarters. It was at that moment I heard my father coming down the corridor, his black boots knocking against the limestone steps. When he saw me, he grinned slightly and turned to look at me and said; "Ahh, Kaylin, I was just coming to find you, I would like to discuss some family matters with you. Come along." He said turning away and beginning to walk up the stairs.

:: Tommen ::

I kissed her, kissed her. I've only known her for a week. I couldn't stop myself. She is so beautiful, so innocent, so lovely. And now, I've scared her away, I kissed her and her first reaction was not to kiss me back, no, she sprinted off into the castle, leaving me shellshocked and alone. My feet catching up to my brain, I sprinted after her, following the echoing sound of her boots along the stone.

Her footsteps faded as I reached the Dragon Cellar. I glanced around quickly and didn't see her, I moved to the next chamber hurriedly. I was beginning to question whether or not she wanted me, she didn't seem pleased to be engaged, she didn't try and speak with me or spend time together, and she didn't kiss me back.

I heard a cry of pain that interrupted me from my thoughts, turning around quickly, I saw Kaylin fall over from behind one of the larger dragon skulls. I sprinted over to her, catching her before she hit the ground and lowering her down softly. I felt the egg behind her head and dragged her off to the infirmary.

After a thorough check by the nurse, while I stood in the corner, stressing over the results of the examination, the nurse left, leaving me and Kaylin alone. I wanted so badly to talk about the kiss, the best kiss I had had in a long time. The first kiss I had that wasn't from a lady trying to win my affection and my power. Not someone desperate to kiss Prince Tommen just because he was a prince. But we would talk later, all I could focus on in this moment was Kaylin hugging me. Her head on my chest, her fragile arms wrapped around my hips, her gentle breathing tickling my arm. Being near her was enough.

Soon enough, the moment had to end and we had to return to normal life. Leaving the infirmary, I pulled her along, hand in hand, and directly collided with Margaery. Every word Margaery was saying was flying over my head, every compliment ignored. All i could think of was Kaylin's hand in mine. "Oh, Prince Tommen my sweet, how are you? You look splendid, gold is really your colour. Oh and you're with my darling Kaylin" she glanced down at me, and the ice pressed to my head "looking after her?" Margaery said, flipping her long, golden brown hair over her bare shoulder and she half-curtsied half-bowed. Her low cut neckline fell forwards slightly, revealing the top her breasts to me, shocked and taken aback, I stood, looking at her, her exposed chest.

Suddenly I felt a loss of warmth on my hand, I tore my eyes away from Lady Margaery, too look down and see Kaylin's fingers slip through mine as she pulled away from me. I frowned slightly as she backed away from me, but I was attempting to reconnect our fingers. I failed, and Kaylin slipped away. As soon as she was gone Margaery saw her chance, took my hand and pulled,

"Come see me in my chambers my prince, I can show you more of what's underneath this dress."

She said, and as much as I tried to resist, pulling gently against her, fighting an internal battle over doing what I desired and what was best for the Seven Kingdoms. Of course, I wanted Kaylin, from the moment I saw her, I knew she was mine, but Margaery, being the eldest of the girls, was entitled to land, wealth and servants, much more than Kaylin was. Distracted from te world, I was brought back by Margaery's constant tugging on my arm, her various rings digging into my fingers. I gave in, wondering what the worst thing that could possibly happen in the next few minutes alone with Lady Margaery. Once we reached her chambers, she dismissed her handmaiden quickly and shut the door, before turning the lock.

"Tommen, why would you marry my sister when you can marry me." She said, taking a step closer slowly, kicking off her shoes as she came and pulling up one edge of her skirt, revealing her pale skin, by now we were just a couple inches away. She placed her hand on my chest, long fingertips lightly tracing the intricate patterns on the bodice of my garments. I looked down at her hand, grabbing it to hold it still. She used my hand on hers as an advantage and moved my hand to her ribcage, just below her breasts. One moment with my hand there and I snapped out of it. I pulled my hand away and moved to step back before realising I had hit the door, my back pressed firmly against the wood. I was trapped, no way to escape her bony fingers that were wrapping around my neck and pulling me into her. She pressed her lips roughly against mine, I gasped, and she took the opportunity to sneak her tongue into her mouth.

Surprising myself, I kissed back. I thought that maybe seeing as Kaylin didn't kiss me back, maybe Margaery was more suitable, I could try and move on. Margaery's hands moved from my the back of my neck to my waist, then to the lace of my trousers, pulling at the strings in an attempt to undo them. Suddenly, the realisation of what I was doing hit me and I pushed Lady Margaery away and left the room. As I scurried down the steps, away from her chambers. "Tommen wait," She said, I turned around and she was only a few steps away from me, "I can do so much better than her, and I can prove it. Come back to my chambers tonight and I'll show you how I would treat you as my husband."

I left the room, unsure of my future. On one hand, Kaylin, the fair and kind Kaylin, has decided to open up to me and talk about the kiss, maybe even about how she feels for me, and I could find out my future with her. On the other hand, Margaery was a guaranteed marriage. She wants me, or my title at least, she could make me happy. But if i marry her, I will spend my life wondering about Kaylin and what if. 

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I AM SO SO SO SO SO SO SORRY FOR THE YEAR OF LITERALLY NO UPDATES !!!!!

I HAVE HAD ABSOLUTELY NO MOTIVATION TO WRITE AND AS MUCH AS I WANTED TO UPDAT FOR ALL 21K (OMG WHAT?????) OF YOU GUYS, I HAVE HAD THE BIGGEST WRITERS BLOCK. FINALLY, I FEEL LIKE WRITING AND BEING CREATIVE SO EXPECT A LOT MORE UPDATES FROM ME

LOVE YOU ALL AND SORRY FOR THE YEAR LONG WAIT 

<3 <3 <3