lxvii. NEVER AGAIN.
March 19, 2018. | Third Person POV.
Los Angeles, California.

The sun peeking through the curtains was disrespectful. 

Sedona groaned, rolling over in her king-sized bed, her silk pillow doing nothing to soothe the dull pounding in her head. Her mouth felt like cotton, and her limbs were heavy, but the echoes of last night's laughter still danced in her mind. She wasn't sure how they all survived, but judging by the faint sound of someone snoring in the other room, they did.  

A faint buzz came from her nightstand—her phone. She blindly reached for it, barely cracking one eye open. Kendrick's name lit up the screen: Y'all still alive?

She smirked, typing back sluggishly: Barely.

Stretching, she sat up slowly, rubbing her temples before forcing herself to get out of bed. The air smelled like faint traces of champagne, body heat, and Chanel perfume. A war zone of silk, makeup wipes, and empty glasses cluttered the living room, along with the crumpled UberEats bag from the late-night fries they'd ordered.  

Sedona shuffled into the kitchen, finding SZA already there, looking entirely too put together for someone who had taken just as many shots last night. She was wearing sunglasses indoors, though, which meant she wasn't as unscathed as she wanted to appear. 

"Good morning, sunshine," SZA said, voice dripping with sarcasm as she sipped from a bottle of water. 

Sedona grunted in response, reaching for her own. "Why do my legs feel like I ran a marathon?" 

"Probably because you decided to recreate Beyoncé's Get Me Bodied choreography at three in the morning." 

Sedona paused mid-sip. "Damn... did I at least kill it?" 

SZA smirked. "You thought you did. I got videos." 

"I don't wanna see it." 

"Too bad. It's already in the group chat." 

Before Sedona could cuss her out, the doorbell rang. They exchanged looks before SZA nodded toward it. "That better not be no food delivery, 'cause I swear we didn't order anything." 

Sedona, still sluggish, made her way to the door and opened it to reveal a delivery man holding the biggest bouquet of flowers she'd ever seen. Roses, peonies, lilies—it was an explosion of pinks, whites, and soft reds. 

"Sedona Baptiste?" The man asked. 

"That's me." 

He handed them over, and she struggled under the weight before finally setting them down on the table. SZA whistled low. "Damn, Kendrick trying to remind the world who you belong to?" 

Sedona peeled open the card tucked into the bouquet. 

Just because. You looked too good last night for me not to send you something this morning. Hope you survived the aftermath. Love you. — K

Her heart did a stupid little flip, and she tried to suppress the giddy smile creeping onto her face. "He's so annoying." 

"Mmhm." SZA grabbed her phone. "Lemme text him 'thanks for making the rest of us look bad.'" 

Loud groaning from the hallway signaled the others finally waking up. Jasmine stumbled into the kitchen first, her curly hair wild and her eyeliner smudged. "Why is the room spinning?" 

"Because champagne is a liar," Sedona muttered, handing her a water bottle. 

Solange followed next, flopping onto the couch. "I'm never drinking again." 

"You say that every time," SZA pointed out. 

"This time I mean it." 

Lastly, it was Amanda, "Remind me to never have fun with you guys."

The next hour was spent reliving the night through blurry pictures and chaotic videos, the kind of evidence they'd eventually delete but keep just long enough to laugh about. The karaoke mic battle, the tipsy heart-to-hearts in the bathroom, the dramatic storytelling that led to everyone shrieking like a high school sleepover—it was all still fresh in their minds. 

"You know," Jasmine said between bites of the bagel she found in Sedona's fridge, "Last night was exactly what we needed. A reminder that life is still fun." 

Amanda hummed in agreement, scrolling through her phone. "No scandals, no regrets... well, except for SZA calling that takeout spot thinking it was her boo."

"I have no memory," SZA shot back. "False accusations." 

Laughter erupted again, the kind that made their heads hurt but felt too good to stop. 

Sedona sat back, taking it all in. Her girls, her home, her life—the love she was surrounded by. She was exactly where she was meant to be, and that alone was worth any hangover.

The room settled into a comfortable silence as they all sunk back into their spots, nursing their respective headaches. Sedona smirked, finally giving in to the hilarity of it all. "So, what's the lesson learned here?"

"Stay away from drunk cartwheels," Solange offered sagely.

"And maybe don't challenge the universe by trying to turn your living room into a dance floor," Jasmine added.

"Mimosas are the devil."

SZA, still with a mischievous grin, raised her eyebrows. "But hey, it was a blast while it lasted."

"True," Sedona agreed, a playful glint in her eye. "We'll survive this hangover... and we'll be ready for round two."

—

A few hours later, the girls found themselves piled into an Uber, trying to shake off the remnants of the previous night. The air in the car was heavy with the sweet scent of fresh fruit and bottled water, a direct contrast to the tequila fumes that had lingered all morning. Sedona leaned against the window, her eyes half-lidded as the city passed by. It was almost too quiet after the chaos of their wild night but in the best way possible.

"You know, the universe might have cursed us with that hangover," Amanda said, her voice barely above a whisper, "But thank God we have this spa day to save us from ourselves."

Jasmine, who had one hand on her stomach, groaned in agreement. "I can't even look at alcohol right now. Only fruits and water from now on."

SZA, sitting next to her, shot her a smirk. "That's what you said last time. But we'll see."

"I mean it this time," Jasmine insisted, eyes narrowed as if she was already plotting her path to redemption.

Solange was sitting at the other end of the car, scrolling through her phone, but looked up long enough to add, "At least we can detox properly, right? Mud baths, massages... I need all of it."

"Yes," Sedona muttered, closing her eyes and imagining herself sinking into a deep, dark bath of soothing mud. "This is exactly what I need. No more champagne... just pure, unadulterated relaxation." She sighed deeply, already feeling the tension in her shoulders begin to ease at the thought.

The car pulled up to the spa, and the girls all shuffled out in a quiet, unspoken agreement that they were about to fully embrace the luxury of doing absolutely nothing. The spa was nestled in the middle of a secluded part of town, surrounded by nature, with tall trees that seemed to whisper in the wind. The scent of lavender and eucalyptus wafted through the air as they entered, and Sedona could feel her heartbeat slow just from the peaceful atmosphere.

"Ready for this?" Solange asked, raising an eyebrow at Sedona.

"You have no idea," Sedona replied, her voice already softer as she took in the serene surroundings.

The receptionist greeted them with a calm, practiced smile, handing over fluffy robes and sandals. As they made their way to the treatment rooms, the chatter from earlier faded, replaced by the soothing sounds of running water and the faint hum of soft spa music.

Soon enough, they found themselves in the mud bath area, a large, inviting pool of thick, dark mud surrounded by smooth stones. The smell was earthy, and comforting, and it felt like the kind of therapy they all desperately needed.

Sedona wasted no time. She sank into the mud, feeling the coolness wrap around her skin, easing the last remnants of discomfort from her body. The heat from the bath seeped into her muscles, and for a moment, she couldn't remember the last time she'd felt this at peace.

She let out a slow, contented sigh as she relaxed deeper, her entire body sinking into the warm embrace of the mud. The weight of the world, or at least last night's madness, slowly lifted from her. The soft, rhythmic bubbles from the bath massaged her as she closed her eyes and let her mind wander.

"This is heaven," Sedona muttered under her breath, sinking even lower. Her arms floated by her sides, and for the first time in what felt like forever, there was nothing to think about but the present moment.

SZA, who was in the mud bath beside her, let out a soft laugh. "I feel like we should've been doing this the entire time instead of doing tequila shots in your living room."

Amanda let out a tired sigh, her body completely relaxed as she stretched her legs out in the mud. "I know. This is the detox I didn't know I needed."

"Same," Solange agreed. "I think this is the perfect remedy for all the chaos. And I haven't been this still in forever."

Jasmine, who had been the most cautious about the mud bath, let out a little squeak as she finally lowered herself into the bath. "This... feels... amazing," She whispered, closing her eyes as the warmth enveloped her body. "I might just fall asleep in here."

"I wouldn't blame you," Sedona responded lazily, resting her head on the side of the pool and gazing up at the high, open ceiling. It was filled with greenery, with sunlight filtering through the leaves, casting playful shadows on the floor. "This is the kind of thing they should put on a brochure. 'A spa day that's a cure for bad decisions.'"

SZA laughed quietly. "Honestly, that should be a thing. Get people in here before they make those mistakes."

"You guys are right," Amanda said with a content sigh. "This is perfect. We needed this. Detoxing despite the hangovers."

They all fell into a comfortable silence, each of them submerged in their own thoughts, just enjoying the stillness of the moment. There were no obligations, no deadlines—just them, the mud, and the peace that came with letting go of everything else.

As the spa therapist came to check in on them, she offered fresh fruit and cold water, which they happily accepted. Sedona picked up a piece of pineapple and bit into it, letting the sweet juices coat her mouth.

"This is what I'm talking about," She murmured around a bite. "This is real self-care." She took another piece and handed one to SZA. "No more mimosas for me—just fruit and good vibes from here on out."

"Agreed," SZA said, her voice softer now, almost meditative. "Next time, we just do this. No dancing on kitchen tables. No drunken cartwheels. Just... this."

"Sounds perfect," Sedona replied, her eyes slipping shut once again as she sank deeper into the mud, finally giving in to the serenity of the moment.

And for the first time in a long time, Sedona felt truly at peace.

The time seemed to blur in the tranquil warmth of the mud bath. As the sun dipped lower in the sky, the girls slowly made their way out, each of them reluctantly leaving behind the peaceful embrace of the mud. Their skin felt soft, renewed, and their minds—still groggy from the hangover but now gently cleansed—felt lighter.

Sedona wrapped herself in a soft, white robe, the warmth from the bath still radiating off her body. She could feel the last of the tension melting away, her muscles completely relaxed, and for the first time in what felt like forever, she felt like herself again—calm, grounded, and ready to take on whatever came next.

"That was... everything," Amanda said as she wrapped her towel around her hair, stepping out into the cool, fragrant air of the spa's lounge area. "Honestly, I feel like I could live in there forever."

Jasmine nodded enthusiastically, sipping on a coconut water from one of the trays nearby. "I don't know how I'm gonna go back to real life after this."

Solange, who was already flipping through a magazine, leaned back against a cushioned lounge chair. "You know, I'd be down for a repeat. Except this time, no wild nights beforehand. Just... peace."

SZA, who had been unusually quiet since they left the bath, stretched her arms above her head, a satisfied smile on her face. "It's crazy how something so simple can reset everything. I might actually consider going to the spa more often. Detoxing in the mud is my new religion."

Sedona chuckled softly, finding a seat beside Solange. "Well, if I'm being honest, after last night's chaos, I needed this more than I thought. You guys ever have those moments where you think you're okay, and then you realize you've been running on fumes?"

"You mean every day?" SZA quipped with a grin.

"Exactly!" Sedona laughed. "I swear, I keep forgetting that I'm human too. Like, I'm out here juggling a thousand things, but forgetting that... I can't do it all perfectly all the time."

"I think you're doing just fine," Solange said, her tone gentle. "But yeah, this was a reminder for all of us. You don't have to keep pushing when you need to slow down. Even when things feel out of control, you can hit reset."

"True," Sedona said, nodding thoughtfully. "It's easy to get caught up in everything, but sometimes, you gotta take a step back and breathe."

As the girls relaxed in the lounge, munching on fruit and sipping on chilled juices, the air was filled with light conversation and soft laughter. It wasn't the chaotic energy from last night, but something more subtle and calm, the kind of joy that came from just being with good people. No distractions. No noise. Just... presence.

The spa therapist returned to guide them to their next treatments. Each of them opted for a light massage, allowing the therapist's hands to work through the last remnants of tension. Sedona felt the knots in her back melt away with every pass of the therapist's palms. Her mind wandered again, this time thinking about everything that had led her to this moment—her friends, her career, the whirlwind that was her life. And yet, this simple moment of stillness felt like the most significant.

When the massages ended, the girls were wrapped in plush robes and led outside, where the sun was beginning to set. The air had cooled, and there was something almost magical about the golden light falling over the garden. Sedona stood at the edge of the spa, taking in the quiet serenity of it all. The moment felt sacred.

"What's next?" Jasmine asked, breaking the comfortable silence as she joined Sedona by the garden.

Sedona glanced over at her with a knowing smile. "Next... we take it easy. No more crazy nights for a while. Just good vibes and time spent with people who get it."

"I second that," Amanda added, her eyes twinkling with a playful glint. "But we're still doing karaoke next week, right?"

"Absolutely," Sedona replied with a laugh. "We're not giving up the fun altogether."

Solange, who had wandered toward the pool, called out, "We could always come back here when we need another detox. Think about it—mud baths, massages, and no alcohol to ruin the experience."

SZA raised her glass of water. "I'm down. You know, I think we just need a reminder that relaxation doesn't need to come after a crisis. It can just be part of the routine."

"I'll drink to that," Sedona said, smiling to herself.

—

The spa afternoon had bled into a leisurely evening, the girls chatting and laughing as they went from one spot to another in the city. The conversation flowed naturally, with a mix of lighthearted banter and deeper discussions about their lives, careers, and everything in between. They even squeezed in a light dinner at a local restaurant, eating grilled fish and fruit plates, trying to balance out the indulgence of the previous night with something a bit more wholesome.

It wasn't until the sun had completely set that they finally parted ways, each heading in their separate directions. Solange and SZA caught their rides back to their respective places, while Jasmine and Amanda hopped into a cab, off to meet some friends. As Sedona waved them off from the sidewalk, she couldn't help but feel a bit of longing for the carefree energy of the day. It had been perfect—a reset.

But now, as she entered her home, the quietness seemed to settle in. The echo of laughter was replaced with the hum of the city outside her windows, the only sound in the space. She kicked off her shoes, letting out a long breath, her muscles finally unwinding from the tension of the past few days.

She walked into the kitchen, where the faint scent of last night's indulgence still lingered. On the counter, the bouquet Kendrick had sent earlier that morning sat beautifully, the roses, peonies, and lilies still in full bloom. The sight of them made her heart flutter again. It was exactly what she needed, and exactly what she didn't expect. She couldn't help but smile as she took them in one more time, her fingers brushing against a soft petal.

Pulling open the freezer, she grabbed her favorite tub of raspberry cheesecake ice cream and plopped down on the couch, pulling a spoon from the drawer. As she dug into the creamy dessert, she stared out the window, letting her mind wander back to the chaos of last night. Between the shots, the dancing, and all the good laughs, it had been one hell of a ride.

The phone buzzed on the coffee table, pulling her from her thoughts. Kendrick's name flashed on the screen.

She wiped her mouth, answering with a smile. "Hey, you."

"How you feelin'?" Kendrick's voice was warm, with a hint of concern. "You surviving the aftermath of your lil' get-together?"

Sedona leaned back on the couch, taking another bite of her ice cream. "Barely. I'm never touching a glass of mimosa again. Ever."

Kendrick chuckled. "I was wondering how long it'd take for you to come to that conclusion. You looked like you were having a time."

"I was... until I tried to do a cartwheel." She sighed dramatically, shifting the phone so she could take another spoonful of ice cream. "That was a mistake I can never unsee."

"Cartwheels, huh?" Kendrick laughed softly. "I'm glad I missed that part."

"Trust me, you didn't miss much," She replied, a playful edge to her voice. "But yeah, just—no more mimosas for me. That's my official stance. Ever again."

He laughed again, the sound a comforting, familiar presence in the quiet of her apartment. "Alright, I'll hold you to that. No more wild brunches, huh?"

"Exactly," She said, her voice softening as she shifted the conversation. "And by the way, the flowers you sent this morning were beautiful. Seriously. I loved them."

She heard him pause on the other end. "I'm glad you liked them. I just... thought you deserved something nice after last night."

Sedona's smile grew wider, and she leaned her head back against the couch. "Thank you. You're sweet, you know that? You really know how to make me feel special."

"It's easy when you're already special," He replied, his tone sincere.

She could feel her heart warming at his words. "Well, I'm lucky to have you, Kendrick."

"I feel the same way," He said softly, and there was a brief moment of comfortable silence between them. It wasn't the usual upbeat banter but something deeper, more grounding.

"Alright, I should let you go," Sedona said, breaking the silence, but her voice still held the warmth of their shared moment. "Thanks again for the flowers. I've been annoying the girls with how much I love them. They were the perfect surprise."

"You deserve it all," Kendrick responded. "Take care of yourself, alright?"

"I will," Sedona said with a small smile. "And you too."

He chuckled, the sound lingering on the line. "No promises. But I'll try."

They said their goodbyes, and Sedona hung up, sinking back into the couch with a contented sigh. It had been a whirlwind of a weekend, and while there was still the echo of the chaos, she felt lighter now. The peace of the moment, the stillness in her home, felt right.

As she finished off the ice cream, she thought about everything that had happened—how much fun they'd had, how much she appreciated the people around her, and how lucky she was to be where she was in life. It was far from perfect, but it was hers. And in this quiet, peaceful moment, that was enough.

She glanced over at the flowers again, the bouquet now perched in a vase on the table. With a smile, she leaned over and inhaled the soft scent. Kendrick had a way of making her feel cherished. Maybe it was the flowers, or the way he always knew what she needed before she did—but whatever it was, it made all the difference.

—

Sedona sat curled up on the couch, her bowl of ice cream now reduced to a few melty spoonfuls. The phone call with Kendrick had left her feeling warm and full in a way she hadn't expected. He always had that effect on her. Even after the chaos of last night, just hearing his voice brought her a sense of ease.

But as she sat there, twirling the spoon between her fingers, a different kind of restlessness settled in.

It had been on her mind for weeks now, creeping in at odd moments—while she was brushing her teeth, waiting in line for coffee, or scrolling through her phone late at night. The unspoken weight of it pressed against her, heavier now than before.

She grabbed her phone again, hesitating for only a moment before dialing a familiar number.

After a few rings, a voice answered. "Dr. Garcia's office."

"Hey, Sofia. It's Sedona."

"Sedona! Good to hear from you. I didn't see you on the schedule today—do you need to set up an appointment?"

"Actually... is Dr. G available for a quick session? Doesn't have to be long, I just—" She exhaled, rubbing her forehead. "I just have some things on my mind."

"Let me check." There was a pause, the faint sound of keys clicking in the background. "You're in luck. She has a virtual opening in about thirty minutes. Will that work?"

"Yeah. That's perfect."

"Great. I'll send the link over now."

"Thanks, Sofia."

Thirty minutes later, Sedona was in her bedroom, sitting in front of her laptop as Dr. Garcia's familiar face appeared on the screen. She was seated in her usual space, bookshelves lining the back wall, her glasses perched on the bridge of her nose.

"Sedona," She greeted with her usual calm presence. "Wasn't expecting to see you today, but I'm glad you reached out. What's on your mind?"

Sedona sighed, leaning into her palm. "A lot, honestly. I don't know how to even start, so I'm just gonna talk."

"That's what I'm here for."

She let out a short laugh before pressing her lips together. "So, Kendrick and I... we've been seeing each other for almost two months now."

Dr. Garcia nodded, waiting.

"You know about my three-month rule. I swore to myself I wouldn't even think about crossing that line with anyone before then."

"But you're thinking about it now," She noted.

She exhaled. "Yeah. And it's messing with me. Because I meant what I said about waiting. But I also haven't felt like this in a long time. Like I don't have to hold back."

Dr. Garcia adjusted her glasses. "Why do you think that is? What makes this different from your past relationships?"

Sedona went quiet for a moment, fingers idly tracing the hem of her pajama shorts. "With Marco... and even with those short flings I've had, I settled. I was willing to accept the bare minimum, even when it cost me my sanity."

Dr. Garcia nodded, but didn't interrupt.

"But with Kendrick... he makes it easy to be open," She admitted, her voice softer now. "Like, I don't have to fight for the bare minimum because he just gives it. And not in a way that feels performative or temporary. It's natural for him."

She paused, exhaling. "I guess I'm just not used to that."

Dr. Garcia studied her for a moment before speaking. "It sounds like you've done a lot of work to recognize what you don't want. Now, you're being presented with something different—something healthy. And it's challenging the rules you set for yourself. Does that scare you?"

Sedona blinked, his words settling in.

"Yeah," She admitted. "Because what if I'm wrong? What if I let myself fall too soon, and I get hurt again?"

"That's a valid fear," She acknowledged. "But what if you don't?"

Sedona let out a small laugh, shaking her head. "I hate when you flip things on me like that."

Dr. Garcia smiled knowingly.

She sighed, running a hand through her curls. "It's just... I've always been careful. Always. Even with who I sleep with."

Dr. Garcia tilted her head slightly. "Tell me more about that."

She shifted in her seat. "I got an IUD a few years ago, and I've always made sure my partners wrapped it up. No slip-ups, no risks. It wasn't just about pregnancy—I needed control over my own body, my own choices."

She nodded. "That makes sense. You've taken intentional steps to protect yourself."

"Yeah. And now, I'm about to be twenty-eight, and I know I don't have time for games. I don't have time for bullshit. I want to date to marry. And eventually, I do want kids—on my own terms."

Dr. Garcia leaned forward slightly. "And do you think Kendrick aligns with those values?"

Sedona hesitated but then nodded. "I do. He's never given me a reason to think otherwise."

Dr. Garcia studied her for a moment. "Then I think the question isn't whether you should break your rule, but rather... what breaking it would mean to you."

Sedona let his words sink in.

"You set that boundary for a reason," She continued. "If you decide to move past it, it should be because you feel safe, ready, and empowered to do so. Not because you feel pressured—externally or internally."

She took a slow breath. "Yeah... that makes sense."

Dr. Garcia gave her a reassuring nod. "There's no rush, Sedona. The important thing is that whatever choice you make, it's one you can stand by without regret."

Sedona sat back, exhaling deeply.

No regret.

That was the key.

"I appreciate you, Dr. G," She finally said, a small smile playing on her lips.

"Always happy to help," She replied warmly. "We can revisit this in our next session, but in the meantime—listen to yourself. You've got good instincts."

"Will do."

They exchanged their goodbyes, and as Sedona shut her laptop, she sat in the quiet, letting everything settle.

She wasn't going to make a rushed decision. But for the first time in a long time, she wasn't afraid of the choice.

And that? That felt like growth.

—

©kashdemi
Volume I- Redamancy.
Chapter Sixty-seven.
— ０３／０２／２５
———————

#Plotting.

We've officially hit 50k reads which is beyond insane to me. A huge thank you to everyone who's been reading, voting, commenting because it hasn't gone unnoticed. I'm so appreciative of the love that I've been getting and all I can say right now is thank you. It's only up from here!

Stay tuned for the next chapter, & til next time!
-shea