Shuichi Saihara X [Non-binary] Reader

IT'S A DOUBLE UPDATE! GET ON MY LEVEL, BISH!

Please don't kill me! I never done anything like this before, so it might be crappy. FORGIVE ME! ;^; I'm also changing someone's murder...

WARNING!

ANGST!

ANGST!

THE FEELS ARE REAL!

Requested by: chubby-robot

Y/N's POV

'Perhaps it was a mistake... my birth, that is...'

Sliding down the door, I covered half of my face with my hand.

'All I wanted... was to be accepted for who I chose to be...'

A sob found its way and escaped from my mouth. I destroyed all the mirrors in my room, not wanting to look at my reflection. I even made myself sick.

'Too feminine, too masculine... you should decide which one... You can't identify as nothing...!'

I clutched my shirt tightly and pulled, trying to release my frustration. Silently, I got up and walked towards the shower. In the reflection of the glass, I saw everything I didn't want to see.

"Why do I have a chest..?" I mumbled while covering them with my arms. "Why are my hips wide and waist so thin..?!"

I banged on the glass, hating my very reflection.

Earlier that day, the Ultimate Dictator had gotten to me. Even though his jokes may be light and fun, they really weighed down on me, crushing the air out of my lungs.

-Flashback-

"Oh~ What's this? Y/N-chan is non-binary?" Ouma asked, tilting his head slightly in confusion.

"Hm...? Oh, yeah... I am." I answered.

"But you're a girl."

I bit my lip, trying to forge a smile. "Y-Yes... but I don't identify as either male or female..."

Ouma seemed to have sensed my discomfort and decided to make it worse. "Look at your boobs and waist. You're clearly a woman."

At this point, I felt extremely uncomfortable, slightly fidgeting with my fingers. "Though I was born a female... I have decided that-"

"You can't change that though." He interrupted, a mischievous smile adorning his lips. "It's like saying you're a person and are now a crow." [If you get why I put 'crow' or get the reference, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE?!]

Those words shattered me, and I felt my eyes begin to water.

"Ouma-kun, I think that's enough."

I turned around to see Saihara standing there, a slight frown on his face. He held onto the bill of his cap as if trying to hide his face.

"Nishishishi~ Okay, Saihara-kun! I'll be going then!~" Ouma waved while laughing as he walked down the hall.

Letting out a sigh, I met eyes with Shuichi. "Thank you."

He nodded. "I understand your situation. I know it's tough but pull through, alright?"

I weakly smiled in response. "Okay... Make sure you solve Hoshi's death... Good luck, Saihara!"

He smiled back at me, giving me a thumbs up. "You bet I will!"

***

"Maybe... I can go see what Shuichi is doing...?" I mumbled, picking myself up. When I got to the sink, I washed my face from the tears.

I stared at the cracked mirror in front of me, seeing my face in all the different fragments of the reflecting glass.

"Maybe if I was normal... everything would've been okay..." Accepting that truth, I slowly dragged myself to Saihara's research room, a frown embedded in my face.

"Oh, hello, Miss Extremely-Talented-Archer. What brings you here at this time of night?" He asked, slightly confused. His eyes then noticed the tear streaks on my cheeks. "What's wrong?"

At those two words, the sobs I've been trying to hold back burst, and I ran towards Shuichi, grabbing his vest. "I... can't deal with it..!" I cried, staining his clothing with my tears.

"Deal with what? Is something bothering you?" He questioned while stroking my head.

I slowly released my grip from him, standing and staring at his eyes, my face still red with sadness. "Wh-What does it look like?"

He sighed, locking eyes with me. "What happened?"

My cries soon faded away until I could finally form sentences without stuttering. "I tried to accept the truth..."

"The truth? What exactly do you mean, Y/N?"

"I'm not normal like everyone else... I'm struggling... suffocating in this world that doesn't want me. Why was I born if I wasn't meant to be here..?" I choked out, holding my hand against my mouth to prevent myself from letting the waterworks flow once again.

"Don't say that." Shuichi leaned closer to me. "Y/N, you were born for a purpose, so don't ever doubt that your life is precious. I'll accept you even when everyone turns on you." His hand slowly caressed my cheek, wiping away a single tear that had fallen without my notice.

"I-I'm sorry... but I just can't help it!" I slightly yelled back, clenching my fists tighter and tighter. "I feel that no one wants me... I'm biologically a girl, but I identify as non-binary... Why is the universe so cruel..?"

I heard a sigh resound in the room, and in an instant, I felt hands grab my shoulders. "Listen, Y/N... Don't make yourself seem insignificant just because others can't accept the fact that you chose to break the norms of society. You're not different; you're unique. Okay?"

I felt my heart swell up at his words.

'Maybe... he accepts me...?'

"Saihara..."

"Sh... now go back to bed. Tomorrow's the class trial, and I don't want you to faint in the middle of it."

My heart leapt in my throat, and I nodded, leaving in utter silence.

Once out of his room, my face reddened.

"Thank you, Shuichi..." I mumbled to myself before leaving. "Maybe we'll meet again someday where I can be good enough for you..." Smiling, I headed back to my room, awaiting the next day.

-Classroom Trials-

Y/N's POV

I stood at the podium, not looking anyone in the eye since I was scared. Utterly terrified of their judgment on me.

"So the weapon was... a hammer?" I asked, slightly nervous.

"No... there must be something we've been missing..." Saihara mumbled under his breath.

I closed my eyes, thinking.

'The weapon was a dart... it hit a major artery, causing him to die from blood loss....'

Despite that fact, I bit my lip, not letting anyone know my thoughts.

"Wait a second..." Himiko interrupted. "I remember seeing a small hole in his jacket..."

My blood ran cold. "D-Do you think that was his cause of death, then, Shuichi?" I blurted out without processing my thoughts.

"Possibly..." He mumbled, still thinking.

"I might have a clue that'll help." Toujo spoke up, her face calm. She opened her palm to reveal a single F/C dart, stained in neon pink blood at the tip. "This might be the murder weapon. There was a lot of blood on the scene, too."

Shuichi's face lit up, seeing the weapon. "...This may be it!"

'Shit...' [I love that rhyme]

"So Hoshi was murdered around the time dinner was being served. The only one that wasn't at the table was Y/N and Tsumugi." Tenko muttered, eying me suspiciously.

"I didn't do it." Tsumugi shrugged. "I was taking a large shit in the toilet. Monokuma served burritos the night before, remember?" She said nonchalantly, no shame in her words whatsoever.

"C-Can we really count that as an alibi..?" Kaito asked nervously.

"She speaks the truth! I did the same last night! Nishishishi~" Ouma cackled.

"Gonta guesses that's an alibi then..?" Gonta asked, unsure.

"Yeah, I think I remember seeing her make a mad dash towards the restroom when I was heading out to get dinner." Maki sighed.

'Is this seriously an alibi..?!'

I sighed, staring at everyone nervously.

"What's your alibi then, Y/N?" Miu asked.

I bit my lip, glancing down at the floor.

"She probably doesn't have one."

"I'm not a girl or boy." I interrupted, feeling something tug at me. "I'm non-binary... can't you accept that?"

Everyone seemed uneasy and started back with the discussion. "So... does Y/N have an alibi?" Angie asked.

"No, I don't..." I mumbled.

A small moment of silence passed through the air before someone's voice cut right through it. I recognized the voice, for it had provided me comfort the night before.

"You... you're kidding..." He mumbled, staring at me wide-eyed.

"I'm sorry... Shuichi..."

"Y/N is the muderer...?" Kiibo asked, slightly shocked by the news.

"It is most certain. The evidence points straight to her that it is practically calling out her name." Korekiyo mumbled through his mask, slightly muffling his voice.

"It makes sense... the dart hit exactly in a spot where a small wound could cause death..." Miu pointed out.

"And who could've done that..." Maki started.

"Other than the Ultimate Archer..." Angie finished.

I stood in place, gripping the stand tightly, feeling the tears drip onto the floor. "I-I'm sorry... everyone... that I'm such a disappointment... a murderer!" I fell onto my knees, my grip never loosening on the wood.

"Y-Y/N... why did you do this..?" Saihara asked, stepping away from his stand. He walked over to me, tears in his eyes.

"Hoshi... you all knew he was an assassin... but he was planning to kill you, Saihara. With the detective gone, everything would've went his way... I'm sorry..."

Shuichi stood there, his face still in shock. He grabbed my arm tightly, shadows cast across his eyes.

I felt him pull me into an embrace. "P-Please don't leave me..."

I, of course, returned the hug. Soon, Monokuma interrupted the moment.

"IT'S VOTING TIME!~"

I smiled painfully as I picked myself. However, when I looked over to Shuichi, he picked himself.

My heart broke into six trillion pieces. [Reference]

"Shuichi...."

"ALRIGHT! The culprit who planned and murdered Hoshi Ryouma for her one true love was Y/N L/N, the Ultimate Archer!" Monokuma cackled. "You got lucky, Saihara-kun, that the majority was Y/N! UPUPUPUPU~"

I looked at my classmates. "I'm sorry for everything. I hope that you accept that I am non-binary. That's my last wish... Please..." my head dropped to look down at the floor. "Grant it before my death..!"

Everyone stayed silent, and when I looked up, I saw every staring at me, everyone having a soft smile on their lips. (Except Korekiyo)

"Y/N... we'll always accept you. We're your friends, right?" Himiko grinned sweetly.

"We don't care if you're non-binary. You're one of us." Kaito cheered.

"I'm sorry that I teased you about it. Just know that this little dictator will always support you!" Ouma cackled.

"Guys..." I mumbled quietly, tears falling freely. "Thank you... so much!"

"Y/N..."

I looked over to the source of the voice. "S-Saihara..." My face flushed a bit.

"Please know.... that you'll forever be in my heart. For the first time... I love you for who you are..." He smiled bitterly. I saw his eyes starting to water, too.

I gently wrapped my arms around his neck, letting my hands roam to the back of his head. I pushed, making our foreheads touch and everyone gasp.

"Saihara... I love you, too... I'm sorry..."

He started crying, sobs racking throughout his entire body.

"Don't cry, love. We'll meet each other again soon... I promise." I soothed while rubbing his back. Hesitantly, I leaned in, and our lips connected.

"It's punishment time!" Monokuma laughed.

A chain wrapped around my neck after he pressed the red button with his hammer.

"I have a little something prepared for Y/N, the Ultimate Archer!~"

As I was dragged away, Shuichi tried to run after me, hoping that I would grab onto his hands.

Finally, I spoke my final words which shattered the poor detective.

"Thank you, Shuichi... for being the first person to accept me."

Aye... Did I make you cry? Hopefully I didn't. I was actually surprised some others cried on my previous one shots... Wait. That means... I CAN CREATE DESPAIR! MUHAHAHA!

Next up:

Fly to the Stars [Kaito Momota] {L}

Intricate Clues [Gundham Tanaka]

It's You [Shuichi Saihara] (AU) {L}

-TJ-