35. Reaching Out

Under normal circumstances, I'd put down the blade in my hand and show the boy that I'm not going to hurt him. I wouldn't guess that he's out to hurt me, or Sam, or the unconscious people behind us. But this isn't your average circumstance. I'm not out on the streets, saving a kid's life.

The boy's eyes alone tell me he's a threat. There's malevolence in him, he practically reeks of it.

"You killed my mom," he says. I swear he looks right at me, like he watched me kill his mother. Wait. The Djinn.

I tense as the boy's eyes glow bright blue. Sam moves closer to me, pushing me back towards Charlie and Dean. I keep my blade in a protective stance as Sam takes on the Djinn boy. I wince, watching as the older of the two gets thrown around just like he had by the Djinn mother. My heart is running from fear, the adrenaline. I should help Sam. There could be more Djinn around. I need to protect Charlie and Dean. But Sam's getting his ass handed to him by a little kid. But that's not an ordinary kid, it's a monster child. I'm not afraid of the Djinn boy, I'm torn between my duty to protect the unconscious or protect Sam.

But while Sam is fighting the Djinn, something clicks in my head. You would think the Djinn would be clean with her kills. She's no spring chicken, but she shouldn't be stupid. My mouth parts in realization.

"So, it wasn't your mom who messed up," I say loud enough for the boy to hear. I'm buying Sam time so he can crawl back to his feet. "It was you."

"Shut up! I just came of age, I had to feed. I screwed up." The boy's attention goes towards the direction of his mother's corpse. Sam grabs his dropped blade. "Mom knew how to cover her tracks. She always told me not to play with my food."

The boy's life comes to an end, just like his mother. Only this time, as the boy turns, it's Sam who kills him, and not me.

"Yeah, well, you should have listened to your mom," says Sam. I lick my lips nervously as the body drops to the floor. He's not an innocent child. Don't feel pitiful for him. He's a monster. Emmett and Sophie weren't. He's not like them. He never would be.

I see movement, and I turn. Dean's waking up.

"Dean?" I go to him. "Dean. Hey. Hey! C'mere. You okay? What happened?" I help him out of the chair. "What happened?"

"I'm okay." Our attention goes to Charlie's sleeping form. "Charlie?"

She stirs. At the sight of us, she lets out a tearful gasp. I look at Dean questioningly.

"I'm sorry," Dean tells her. "I had to."

Charlie seems numbed as we leave the warehouse. I feel like I should say something to her, but I can't find the right words. But maybe it's not my place to know what she endured. I don't know her all that well.

It's a very silent Impala ride back to the bunker, a ride that only takes ten minutes for us.

We all file into the bunker under the night sky. Charlie lags behind, and I stay behind with her.

"You gonna be okay?" I ask her.

"Not sure," she says, not meeting my eyes.

I purse my lips. "You know what'll make you feel better? Food. Come on, I'll get you something." We're down the stairs, and I lead Charlie past the boys and through the halls, finding the kitchen. "Tell me what you want and I'll see if I can do it."

"You don't have to." Charlie sits at the table, staring at her hands.

"I know eating isn't the best coping mechanism, but you look like you need it." I begin digging through the cabinets. Hmm, a good old-fashioned classic ought to settle her stomach. "You won't throw up on me if I give you something, will you?"

"We'll see."

I pull out the white bread and the peanut butter. I pick through the fridge to find the jelly before I go to work. I make sure to find the right balance, stealing looks at Charlie. She's still focused on her hands. I sigh through my nose quietly. She's clammed up.

I wipe off the knife thoroughly before plating the sandwiches. I pour us both some milk before delivering the classic to her. I push her plate to her, gesturing.

"It'll settle you," I assure her.

Timidly, looking as though she doesn't want to be rude, she grabs the sandwich and nibbles on it. Since I know I won't get her talking right away, I decide to eat my own sandwich. Charlie avoids all eye contact with me, which is a bit frustrating. But I don't let it show to her.

"You can stay here tonight, if you need to," I offer to her. "We'd rather you sleep in a bed than your car."

"You don't have to do that."

"I insist."

Charlie busies herself with her milk, trying to lick off her moustache. "How long have you been around, Max?"

"With Sam and Dean?" My face contorts in concentration. "A little while now. Why?"

"How are you sticking around?"

"How are you still their friend?" I say in a careful, teasing manner.

"They saved my life on more than one occasion."

"I know that feeling." I take a chunk out of my sandwich.

"Seriously, though. Why aren't you somewhere else?"

I choose my words carefully. "I don't have anywhere else to go."

Charlie blinks at me. "Oops, was that a bad question?"

"It's fine," I wave her off. "It's fine, Charlie." My fingertips touch the cold glass.

"Are you sleeping with one of them?"

I nearly choke on the bit of sandwich I've got in my throat. I take some time to swallow it, all while Charlie watches me with big eyes. "N-no." I cough.

"I didn't assume it, I just thought, since you were sticking around-"

"Oh, no, no, I understand." I cough again.

"I didn't mean to almost make you die."

I hit my chest, like I think that'll help anything. "On an unrelated note...what happened at the warehouse, Charlie? With you and Dean?"

"Oh." There she goes again, avoiding my eyes. "It's...this Djinn, it...it thrives on fear. I wasn't in a good place, Max."

"How'd you get through it?"

"It wasn't easy."

"I'll bet Dean told you that he visited your mother."

"H-he did."

I bite my lower lip. "I'm sorry. I...I kinda get where you're coming from."

"You're not the reason your parents got in an accident, I'm sure," she say glumly.

"N-no, I'm not." I swallow the big lump down my throat. "But...I know what it's like, to have to face something like that."

I know what it's like to feel the guilt. I know what it's like to feel responsible for something that's out of your control. But what I did for my family...they don't know. They don't know what I did. They never will. They shouldn't know. They wouldn't understand how desperate I was at the time, how bad things had looked.

"We all have a little tragedy in our lives." I smile timidly. "It's part of life. Hey. It's okay to be a little scared."

"Easy for you to say. I'll bet they rubbed off on you. They're not scared of anything."

"Who? Sam and Dean? Oh, they're scared of things all right. They just hide it better than most people."

"What's your biggest fear, Max?"

Dying in Hell, is the first thing that comes to mind. But I'm not telling Charlie that. I know she's opened up a little bit, but that doesn't guarantee anything on my part. She shouldn't know. None of them should. I need to fix this on my own. Somehow, I've got to find a way to stop this. The bad thing is that I can't expect when my time is done.

"Mine? Going back to what I used to be."

"Were you a bad person or something?"

I laugh dryly. "No. I just went through a bad time."

"Did that bad time land you here?"

"Hmm, I guess you can say that it did." I look past Charlie to see Dean in the doorway. "Keep eating." I excuse myself, squeezing Charlie's shoulder on my way out. Dean scoots back a little down the hall. "Were you eavesdropping?"

"She doing okay?"

"She's finding her way out of it," I note. "She'll be okay by tomorrow."

"And how are you?"

I sigh through my nose. "Exhausted. I feel like I could sleep for a week."

"Speaking of sleep, Sam already crashed."

I frown. "He's going downhill again. We'll keep an eye on him, right?"

"Of course."

"I let Charlie stay here tonight."

"Good. Maybe she'll get some sleep."

"I don't know, Dean, after what the Djinn did to her?"

"If anything happens, we can get her through it. See, you two are getting along fine."

I slip myself around Dean, pushing my head against his chest. "She's all right."

"She hasn't tried to hit on you, has she?"

"Hit on me?" I look up. "Oh." I would have never guessed Charlie rolled that way. "Um, no, she's been too...out of it. If she tries, I'll hate to break it to her."

He kisses my forehead. "How about Charlie takes your room for the night? I can make some space." He guides me until I'm against a wall.

"Are you trying to get me in bed with you, Winchester?" I smirk.

"I don't know. Is it working?"

"Got to try a little harder."

Dean shushes me when we kiss, since for some reason, I burst into laughter. The laughter fades, but my smile doesn't. My heart is doing a sprint in my chest. I want nothing more than to just do this for the next week or so. Not have a case or anything. Just stay in the bunker with Dean.

"Do you have to make noise every time we do something?" Dean mutters against my mouth.

"If you would stop trying to tickle me, then I'll be quiet." I jump up onto his waist when I feel the squeeze under my ass. I can feel the heat between us, it's almost making me dizzy. "Besides, what's with this?"

"What? I can't kiss you?"

"Um, not when I've got a numb girl in the kitchen."

"She's fine."

"Dean." I push on him a little bit. "You saw Charlie's fear. You really think she's okay right now?"

"She's a tough kid. Like you said, she's working through it."

"You pick the worst times." He gives me a slow, tantalizing kiss. "This isn't the proper place or the proper time."

"Then end it." He gives me another dizzying kiss, one that almost makes me want to tear him apart on the spot. What has gotten into him?

"Whoa, okay!" Charlie squeaks. Dean and I both look at her. She's not covering her eyes, but she's not looking at us either. "I didn't realize I was walking into a Fifty Shades moment."

Dean sets me down without me asking. "Sorry." I clear my throat. "You all done, Charlie?"

"Yup."

"Go get your things from your car. It's been a long night."

"What about the mess?"

"I'll clean it up. Crash anywhere you want, okay, just as long as it's not in your car."

Charlie goes through the hall while I go back into the kitchen to clean up. I grab the dirty dishes and decide to busy myself with washing them. I nearly elbow Dean in the ribs when I feel him hug me from behind.

"Seriously, what's up with you tonight?" I mumble as I rinse off the plates. "You're never this affectionate."

"Excuse me, but I have my moments." I feel lips against the back of my skull. "I just need something nice right now."

"I would say help with the dishes, but it's not a pile." Next I focus on the semi-empty milk glasses. "Did something rattle you in the warehouse?" I stop what I'm doing and turn around. "Is that what this is about?"

"Come on, Max-"

"I'm serious, Dean. Did something happen in the dream that freaked you out?" I tilt my head. "Look, nothing's gonna happen to me. I'll help you with Sam in any way that I can. If you guys didn't abandon me, I'm not abandoning you."

Lie, lie, lie, lie, lie. Liar, liar, pants on fire. Sure, what I just told Dean is a lie, but he doesn't call me out on it. It's because he doesn't know, genius. If you just told him...

I can feel guilt constricting my heart. I can handle this on my own. Dean has his own issues with worrying over Sam. He doesn't need to worry about me too. He's got to focus on his baby brother. I'll find a way out of this.

But when am I gonna find the time to cheat my hellish fate?

**I didn't want Charlie to leave so soon. Besides, she and Max needed a bromance.

But Dax though. Mmm. Love me some Dax.**