So I was reading some one shot books and I realised something. There isn't one of them that those not have at least one chapter about self harm, cutting or susisidal thinking...so I might as well join the party of darkness.
Hope you injoy
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Ezra P.O.V
For the last few day's it's been so stressful for me and I don't know why.

Oh yeah I know, training.
Kanan has been training me non stop and it's getting harder.

Like the other day, we were training and when I keep messing up Kanan got mad.

*Flash back*
Me and Kanan were training. "Keep focus Ezra or you are not going to get this blocking right" Kanan told me as I blocked one of his attacks.

"Well I'm tryining" I told him as I went for a attack but he dodged it with ease.

"Do or do not there is no try" Kanan said annoyed.

After a few more minutes and me being defeated for the 100th time Kanan said "Training is over".

With that he walked back to the Ghost without a second thought.

I got up slowly and just stood there.
My frustration grew not because of training or Kanan but at myself.

"Just great. I'm now lossing all the time" I yelled to no one.
Next theing a knew I had my lightsaber ignited and started slashing the air
(Basicy he went all Kylo Ren here 😂)

*end of flash back*

I was now in my room after messing up at training again. I locked the so now one could come in. I just sat there, staring at the wall, just thinking.

Then a thought came to mind. "What if i mess up again and Kanan get so annoyed at me the next time he just kicks me off the ship".

That thought just scared and upset me. I don't want to get kicked off the ship. I don't want to go back to life on the streets.

As those thoughts filled my head I felt something running down my face. Then I realised I was crying. I dry my tears away as fast as I can.

I sit up and looked around the dark room. I then turned my gaze to my backpack and seen something. I jump off my bed and walked over. I opened the bag and looked at what I could find.

When I did i seen some old stuff like tools, medicines and stuff like that but there was one other thing.

A knife, covered in dry blood.

"No i won't go back to doing that" I told myself. Before I meet the crew and after my parent's being taken away, I started cutting. I wasn't proud of it but it felt like it was my only escape from the emotional pain of the world.

I shook my head and was about to leave but stopped. I looked bacg at my bag and see the blad sticking out. I sign and walk over, picking it up.

"Am I really going to do this?" I asked myself. I then thought back to training and my anger grew. "Yes"

Befor I knew, my arm was covered in cuts and blood. I felt myself crying but at this point I don't really care, at least it stops me from thinking about everything eles.

Then my vision started to get blurry and I started to get dizzy. "Oh no" I said to myself as I fell to the ground.

I herd the door to the room open and seen two figurs run in. "Ezra, Ezra can you hear me" I herd someone say but it was all muffled up.
But then everything went black.

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Mwhahaha part two coming soon