You Can't Break Her (Years 13 - 15) by TSTurcotte

Reviewed by AmyMarieZ

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Overview: This review covers years thirteen to fifteen of the nonfiction memoir You Can't Break Her. The chapters contain a huge range of subject matter, including friendship, romance, and hardship. The reader is given an incredibly intimate look at what main character Ama's (representing the author) life was like. Themes of searching for acceptance and happiness run strong through the chapters, tying them together in a cohesive story that show's Ama's continuing journey towards recovery.

Character Development: The character development in this set of chapters was impressive. All of the characters are based on real people from the author's life, so it isn't a surprise that You Can't Break Her features and amazingly varied, realistic and memorable cast. As is, the story is told as a chronological set of specific memories. Even though characters come into and out of the story, sometimes without much introduction or explanation, each of the characters leave an impression on the reader through the way they interact with and affect Ama.

While the characterization is certainly one of the strengths of You Can't Break Her, I feel like it is also an area that could be developed even more to strengthen the presentation of the story as a whole. Years thirteen through fifteen include a huge number of characters, so it is a bit tricky to keep track of all of them. Characters that were once very important friends of Ama's often disappear from the memories, while sometimes characters that haven't been in any memories are suddenly introduced as very close friends of Ama. Since it would be impossible to capture every event of Ama's life in this story, the simplest option might be to go through the chapters and ensure that when characters leave the time line a brief explanation is provided to the reader about where they have gone. Even just a sentence or two could clear up the time lines. Similarly, ensuring that important characters are introduced a bit earlier when they suddenly show up in a memory could help make for a more cohesive read.

As far as characterization, what I felt was missing at many points throughout these chapters was longer segments of dialog. A lot of focus was placed on what characters were doing and what was said between them, but many of these times dialog was very brief or not included. I think more specific dialog between characters would help to give the reader a stronger feeling of what the characters are like, thus creating a stronger attachment to them. For example, I might have liked to see some more dialog between Ama and her friends during their sleepovers.

I also would have liked for more dialog between Ama and Matt to be included, since he was an important friend who didn't seem to get as much screen time as he could have in these chapters. I thought the amount Anthony was included in the later chapters was good, but his introduction seemed rushed and sudden.

Finally, Ama has a few boyfriends in these chapters. Although her relationships with them are explained well and therefore understandable for a reader, including more dialog between her and the boyfriends could help give the reader a stronger feel of what they were like.

The character I get the strongest sense of in these chapters is of course the main character Ama. I'm always blown away by the way the author is able to explain what she was feeling, why she was feeling that way, and also the way she provides retrospective commentary on what it all means. The scene where Ama speaks with her mother again after so many years was extremely powerful. The combination of descriptions, dialog, and Ama's emotions place the reader in Ama's position and make them understand all the pain, disappointment, emptiness and heartbreak.

Another scene that actually made my eyes tear up was the scene where Ama's brother Trevor finds her and they get to see each other again after being separated for so many years. How can you catch up with someone after so much time has gone by? This scene really conveys that heartache, and also shows how desperate Trevor was to find his sister since he ran away from school to do it. The realism that there is nothing more they can do for each other is heartbreaking.

Annie is another character that this set of chapters really highlights. She is in many of the memories, so her actions and dialog develop her as a character smoothly. I get a strong sense of what she is like. She seems to be quite a bit different than Ama, but as Ama notes in one of the memories, they really weren't very much alike, instead bonding over that fact that they were both wild in different ways.

Renee has been a very strong character in previous chapters. She still had a very strong presence in the earlier chapters of this set, but as the chapters progressed, she seemed to be less present. The main scene with her and Ama is when they go camping with Ama's aunt and uncle. During this scene, Ama and Renee are both on edge wondering if Renee will have to move five hours away. I thought this scene conveyed Ama's concern about her friend leaving her well, but I think just a bit more detail and dialog could help to develop it further.

During the camping trip, the things Ama and Renee did together are explained and easy to visualize, but a few more carefully placed pieces of dialog throughout might show the girl's pain and anxiety with even more poignancy. Once the girls find out Renee will not be leaving, I think their relief and joy is well shown. However, after this scene, Renee doesn't have as strong of a presence in the chapters she is in, with more of a focus seeming to be on Annie and Ama's friendship. Eventually, Renee seems to disappear from the memories. It is later explained that Renee moved an hour and a half away. I think providing this detail earlier in the storyline would make her disappearance make more sense.

Pace: I think as a whole the story is well paced, if not just a bit too fast. Even though it is quite a long piece as it is, I still think it can stand to have more details added to individual scenes to slow down the progression of time and really let the reader get even more into the mood and feel of each scene. This is an exceptional piece of writing that completely captivates the reader. I don't think having too much detail could in any way be a bad thing with this story, because there are no points throughout it where it drags or feels like it is moving too slowly.

One thought I had about the pacing of the story was with regard to the way individual chapters were broken up. A few of the chapters focused on a number of different scenes that occurred around the same time. Although they were separate events, something I thought worked really well was the way the themes or ideas in the chapters tied them all together. For example, the chapter about Ama cutting herself is presented in three distinct scenes, but they all tie together, making for a cohesive chapter.

However, there were a couple of chapters where I didn't see an extremely strong connection between the events. For example, one of the chapters in year thirteen began with Ama, Renee, and Annie heckling some girls at the movie theater. It then shifted to their sleepover after the movies, and finally to Renee and Ama going on the camping trip. All of these events are important and memorable, but I felt like the focus of the chapter was a bit scattered. My suggestion might be to split the chapter into two and expand on each of the two themes going on in the chapter. The first could include the scene at the movies and the sleepover, focusing on the friendship and characterization of Renee, Annie, and Ama. The next could focus on the camping trip and the worry and fear that Renee might move away, further cementing how important of a friend she is.

Another chapter where the pace felt a bit off was at the beginning of the school year of year thirteen. The chapter begins with Ama mentioning her brief friendship with Pricilla, before Pricilla and Rachel started ignoring her. Ama then goes on to state that she started hanging out with Annie and Renee, and the chapter shifts to Ama going to Annie's house to hang out. Since Ama had been hanging out with Annie and Renee the whole time, the brief bit about Pricilla didn't really mesh with the rest of the chapter. I might suggest slowing the pace here slightly or providing a bit more explanation about why and if Ama had stopped hanging out with her other friends for a bit.

Description: Wow, the descriptions in this story never cease to impress me. Through just short snapshots of memory, I feel like I have seen the places Ama has been and met the people she's come into contact with. Some of my favorite descriptions in this set of chapters are the descriptions of the outside environment. The coldness of the winter was shown in such detail. One event that particularly stood out to me was when Ama and her friends attempted to sleep outside around a fire in the middle of March. The dangerous experience and the way they recovered from it was shown with so much realism.

Another scene where the details stuck in my mind was the scene where Ama gets drunk at a party. She is unresponsive as she is dragged to a bathroom to be sick. The way the party seems to move around her is disorienting and makes me feel like I am in her place. She then describes how after being sick, she sat in the bathtub and stared at the drain, feeling and wondering if she was actually dead. The specific details of this scene provide so much realism and stick in the reader's mind.

I could go on and on about the details in You Can't Break Her, because honestly they are incredible. I'll just mention one more here. The scene at the New Year's Eve party when Ama, Renee, and Devin are skating across the icy lawn to get to the shed to smoke sticks in my head. The way they were skating creates an easy to visualize scene right from the start. Then, the haunting and menacing way Devin looks at Ama creates some horrifying tension around the character, which ultimately builds to the repulsive thing he does later.

All of the details included in You Can't Break Her are exceptional. My only suggestion for improvement with description is to simply include more of those great details. Some of the shorter scene in the chapters aren't quite as striking as they could be with just a bit more detail, in my opinion. For example, I might have liked to see more description of what is going on in the various houses when Ama goes and meets different characters. I loved the details of Anthony's house and his family, for example. Extending these scenes with a bit more scene setting as well as dialog could be an idea.

Another location where I might have liked just a bit more details were the scenes where Ama and her friends went to bush parties. I think extending these scenes could have developed the atmosphere of what they were like a bit more.

That said, there are some locations throughout the story where I thought less was more with regard to description, creating intensely emotional and powerful scenes. One example would be the scene when Ama uses glass to cut herself. The scene is quite jumpy, going from a party where the cops come, to her and her friends going back out to the scene where she finds a piece of broken glass which she uses to cut herself. At school the next day, the situation is repeated when she finds another piece of broken glass. The fact that the chapter leaves so much unsaid makes it that much more powerful in my opinion.

Plot: A lot happens in years thirteen through fifteen of You Can't Break Her. The various experiences of Ama's life continue to shape her as she grows through her teenage years and learns. Some of the experiences are heartbreaking, while some are funny. Others are awkward, and some are terrifying. The author has managed to capture a huge variety of different experiences that truly show her adolescence in painful and captivating detail.

Since so much happens, I'll take this section to comment on a few of the things I haven't touched on much in the other sections of this review.

One important event that occurs in this section was Ama's new found discovery of religion through summer bible camp. A chapter in year thirteen shows her going to camp and then realizing it is something she likes and that it is having a positive impact on her life. This seems to be a life changing event because after getting home, Ama goes out of her way to join a church, and then throughout later chapters her religious beliefs are brought up on occasion, showing how they affect her decisions. For such an important event, I feel like the chapter could have been extended. None of her time at camp is shown in great detail. Showing a few scenes, or perhaps even just one specific scene at camp where her perspective on the whole thing changed could add to this chapter.

Another important plot development was the scene in year fifteen where Devin takes advantage of Ama. This chapter deals with very difficult and dark subject matter. The way the author has presented it is commendable. Focusing on specific details of the day, as well as the emotional reactions makes this scene memorable, heartbreaking, and horrifying without requiring it to be graphicly detailed. The scenes that follow portray how the event continue to affect Ama as she tries to cope. Her confusion, emptiness and horror come through in a way that shows so much pain. Seeking out her ex-boyfriend for comfort, only to have him use it as an excuse to try to get closer with her makes the whole thing even more heartbreaking. Ama also turns to partying as an escape, drinking until she is sick and unresponsive at a party.

Summary: You Can't Break Her captures an entire life through snapshots of memory, developing into a masterpiece that tells a story of pain, recovery, friendship, heartbreak, and growing up. The chapters included in this review touch on dark subject matter including sexual assault and self-harm in ways that are moving but also tactful. The combination of exceptional characterization, captivating scene setting, and detailed description creates a story that is fully immersive. It's rare to find a piece of writing with the ability to move the reader the way You Can't Break Her does, and I can't wait to see the finished product once it is published.