Despair

By 

ReynaSeaFlame

Reviewed 

By 

AmyMarieZ

Overview: Despair is a collection of short stories featuring elements of fantasy, horror and suspense. While some stories focus on mystical phenomena, others tend more towards the darker side, delving into heavier themes.

Structure: Each individual story in the collection is only one part, so it is easy to pick and choose a story to read without having to sift. The "Author's Note", however, is located right before the final story rather than at the beginning where it might make more logical sense.

Grammar: Grammatically, the stories in Despair are nearly flawless. On occasion, there are minor mistakes with tense or typos, but they are few and far between with only a handful occurring throughout the entire collection.

The only exception is the story "A Shady Arrest". While it is written in present tense, there are a number of locations where the story switches to past tense for a sentence or two.

Pace: The pacing in the stories is often too fast, in particular in the first two stories, "The Path to Death" and "Death is Only the Beginning". Throughout the collection, but in those stories in particular, events become hard to visualize and really feel attached to because they do not seem to read at real time. A bit more description of action and backstory could create a more engaging and memorable read.

Pacing improves in later stories. "Love Lost, Love Gained" and "Gained Desires" are comparatively well paced and easy to visualize. They give the reader adequate time to warm up to the story and develop attachments to the characters and plots.

Character Development: Character development seems to lack in some stories. "Death is Only the Beginning" has potential for great characterization, however the rushed pacing makes it feel as though important information is brushed over. This story seems to want to be just a bit longer and really has so much potential! The plot is perhaps the most compelling in the collection.

Characterization seems to be specifically lacking in the stories "The Path to Death" and "The Test of the Angels". Both of these stories involve a character finding herself in a situation without much explanation of how she got there. She is then thrown into a scene of intense chase and action. While the action is engaging, the constant panic makes it difficult to really become attached to the character. Showing more personality traits that make the character unique and enduring could help set them apart as individuals.

The characterization in the stories "Gained Desires" and "Love Lost, Not Gained" is particularly well done. These stories give the reader a great feel for the emotions the characters are experiencing. Focus in these stories is placed both on who the characters are and the plot, so the characterization really comes through.

Vocabulary/Description: The vocabulary used is varied enough to be interesting, but is not too over-the-top. The word choice fits well with the writing style. The reader never has to pull out the dictionary, but at the same time words are not overused or bland.

While the descriptions themselves are lovely (or horrifying!) to picture and well thought out, the writing itself does not flow at all times. The sentence structure does not create as much drama as it could and seems to be slightly monotone in places. Varying the sentence structure to create more complex sentences that combine descriptions in with the action and offsetting longer sentences with shorter ones could create a more dynamic and interesting read.

Plot: The plot of the story "Death is Only the Beginning" has perhaps the most unachieved potential, but unfortunately seems a bit rushed. Good suspense is built, and while the ending is unexpected, it makes complete sense given the build-up! The plot keeps the reader at the edge of his or her seat!

The stories "The Path to Death" and "The Test of Angels" seem to show a singular exciting event rather than a fully developed plot. While the events described in the stories are thrilling, there doesn't seem to be enough set up for a reader to really gain a full grasp on the plot.

The stories "Gained Desires" and "Love Lost, Love Gained" were in some ways character driven stories, but nonetheless the plots were conveyed clearly and effectively. The combination of characterization and an exciting twist of events at the end of "Gained Desires" made it a thrill to read! The plot of "Love Lost, Love Gained", while slightly confusing, was at the same time thought provoking, a very memorable story!

Question 1: What age group(s) would these story appeal to?

The stories in Despair could appeal to a range of age groups. The content varies from pre-teen targeted to adult targeted. In general, the simplicity of the writing style seems to be more targeted towards a younger audience.

"Death Is Only the Beginning" – The simplicity of the sentence structure of this story gives it a feel as though it would be targeted to a young adult or pre-teen audience. However, the content of the story could appeal to an adult audience as well.

"The Path to Death" and "The Test of the Angels" – The combination of writing style and plot in these two stories seems to be fitting for a pre-teen audience.

"Gained Desires" and "Love Lost, Love Gained" – The writing itself and the content in these stories would appeal to new adults and young adults.

"River of Tears" – This story has a poetic feel to it and seems to read almost like mythology. It could appeal to all audiences.

"A Shady Arrest" – The content of this story could appeal to pre-teen through adult audiences.

Question 2: What can be done to improve the stories?

The main suggestion for improvement would be slowing down the pace of the stories, giving the reader more time to become invested in both the plot and the characters, as well as making events easier to visualize and more real.

Varying sentence structure and focusing on flow from one sentence to the next might give the stories a better feel to read. One way of doing this would be trimming unnecessary words from sentences, as well as combining descriptive sentences in with action sentences a bit more. Avoiding the use of same words in paragraphs also would help flow. Finally, more of a focus on implied cause and effect could help flow. Directly stating cause and effect is usually unnecessary. A reader can normally already gather that from context.

Considering the purpose of each story while writing may help convey plot in a more moving way. Some of the stories clearly have a purpose, and those stories are the ones where the plot really sticks with the reader and has meaning. Others, while they may have great intention and meaning, seem to lose that a bit. Focusing on why the story is being told might help to get across the purpose, and make it more compelling, engaging and memorable!

In a few stories, the point of the story was outright stated at the end. Ideally, if the reader could figure that point out for his or herself by the end without having to be told, it would create more of a lasting effect and stick with the reader more.

Summary: The stories in Despair offer lovely and also at times terrifying imagery. Fans of fantasy, horror, or just anyone interested in reading something just a bit different will enjoy these stories! With such a broad range of topics – from suspense, to magic, to love and loss, there is something in this collection for almost any reader!

Note: The review book offers several options. To review only grammar and sentence structure. To review only character development and plot. To review only vocabulary and descriptions. Or, the requester can ask for all of this to be reviewed. There are two options when making this request – for it to be sugar-coated or not.

This review is for it all to be touched on (not sugar-coated).