A Game of Survival (Prologue - 5) by tellsbooks

Reviewed by AmyMarieZ

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Overview: After a dark prophecy, King Georgian IV determines that magic users known as Magi, are a dangerous threat. Women have a fifty percent chance of having children with the Magi gene, so the king decides that the women must be taken from their homes to remove the danger.

A Game of Survival is a fantasy story following Thea, a young girl whose life is torn apart by the injustices in her world. When guards come to remove her, her older sister protects her by disguising her as a boy. After Thea's sister is taken, she is left alone and vulnerable. The story follows her life as strange and dark forces fight to control her, and she struggles to survive and seek justice.

Structure: The story is written in the third person omniscient past tense and shows the perspective of multiple characters including the king, Thea, Thea's sister Dominya, the demon Hel, and briefly the guards that have taken Dominya. Although the narration is omniscient, Thea is by far the main character. The perspective of the story switches frequently in the beginning, but by chapter three it almost exclusively follows Thea, with the only exception being when the thoughts of Hel, the dark magical being that possesses Thea, are shown.

The narrative style works quite well, particularly when Hel takes control of Thea. A combination of second and third person narration is used to show the possession, and it is chilling.

Grammar: The grammar in A Game of Survival is very well done. It is clear that the story has been edited for grammar fairly extensively. I noticed a few minor typos throughout the story which I have pointed out inline, but they are all simple fixes. I did not notice any persistent grammatical errors.

Pace: I thought the pace of the story was particularly well done. The level of description, dialog, and action in individual scenes made them easy to visualize as though they were happening in real time. The plot moves along quickly with new developments coming in each chapter, so it never lost my interest.

Something I really loved about the pacing of the story was the fact that the prologue, although it focuses on a different character, was immediately relevant to the plot of the story. Often times, I read a prologue and then am unable to draw a connection between it and the rest of the story at the beginning, so I begin to forget it. However, in A Game of Survival, the first event of the first chapter directly relates to the events of the prologue. In the prologue, the king realizes that women are a danger to him because of the possibility of their children being Magi. The first scene of the first chapter opens with Dominya trying to protect her sister from being taken. Without it ever having to be stated, I was able to draw the connection with what was going on. The women are being rounded up because of this prophecy.

Another thing I liked about the pacing was the balance between showing and telling. While the majority of the story was shown vividly, when not much detail was required, the scenes were not stretched out for the purpose of "showing" it to the reader. For example, the scene where the guards decide to terrorize the village was quite brief. Rather than showing exactly what each guard did, the scene was accomplished by generalizing their thought processes and actions. I thought this was highly effective because it smoothly got across a lot of information. Had the scene been drawn out, I think it might have lost a bit of interest for me. However, by keeping the pace quick, it kept me pulled into the story and eager to find out more!

The one point of the story where the pace felt a bit slow to me was when Hel was controlling Thea and using her to terrorize the town. I felt like the idea of this scene and individual descriptions in it were horrifying, but for some reason it seemed to drag just a bit to me. I think something that could help push this scene along and make it even more intense would be to simply trim down or break up a few of the larger sentences and paragraphs. I began to get a bit lost in the bulky paragraphs. I think a few well-placed, short, one-line paragraphs throughout the scene could make it more engaging.

Character Development: When I think back on the characters introduced in the first five chapters of A Game of Survival, I realize that there are actually a lot of important characters. However, despite the fact that so many characters are introduced across the chapters, their personalities are all defined and varied. They each stand out as memorable, and I had no trouble keeping track of them. That's a sign of great characterization in my opinion! For this review, I will give my thoughts on a few of the important characters.

THEA: She is by far the main character in the story. The first chapter opens with her sister rushing into their home, trying to hide her by disguising her as a boy. Thea's fear and confusion is conveyed well during this scene. In the first chapter and the chapter that follows, Thea comes across as fairly young and weak. With her sister gone, she is lost about what to do, perhaps a reason why the magical being Hel comes to her.

Under the control of Hel, Thea is hardly in her own mind. She feels distant to the reader as Hel controls her body, forcing her to do horrible things in the name of survival. While it is apparent Thea does not want to hurt anyone, she appears to not have much say in the matter.

As the chapters progress, Thea starts to gain more control of herself. She shows confidence and curiosity when she first arrives in Kingsland, approaching two men on the street discussing what is going on in the kingdom, as well as speaking with the man Jiran who offers to make her his apprentice, although with the guidance of Hel she refuses.

As Thea becomes stronger and more confident, she finds a group of orphans living in the city and is taken in by them. With her new-found desire for independence, she banishes Hel from her mind, and life seems to begin anew for her.

From the beginning where Thea showed desire to speak out but not enough confidence to do it, to the end where she banishes Hel from her mind, Thea has shown a lot of development. Her cleverness, craftiness, and genuinely good intentions make her an easy character to get behind and route for.

HEL: The magical being Hel is the most mysterious character in this story. To me, she seems like a dark force tempting Thea to do evil by persuading her that it is what she needs to do in order to accomplish an overall good in the world. She comes to Thea when the girl is at her weakest and forces her to do horrifying things. Hel doesn't seem to have complete control of Thea, however, because Thea is able to resist and eventually banish Hel.

I thought the first appearance of Hel was particularly well done. The description of her appearance and her dialog are intense and interesting. My favorite part of this character is how her possession of Thea is portrayed in the narration. Third and second person narration are used simultaneously, so it almost feels like the demon is attempting to reach through the page and possess the reader. I really liked the repetition of the concept of fear throughout these parts. The effects of fear are described extensively, and it really shows how Hel is using Thea's fear to control her.

DOMINYA: Thea's sister Dominya is only in the story briefly, but I thought she was an important character because she is the only person Thea has had a strong relationship with in the past. Thea's love for her sister is something that drives her to keep going, living on Dominya's final wish for Thea: survive.

While I like the scenes that include Dominya, I think there is a bit of potential for more character development from her. For example, when Dominya is taken from her home and memories flash before her eyes, I thought mentioning a few specific memories of her and her sister might have been more poignant. It would have given me a stronger idea of what their relationship was like, as well as a bit of an idea about what their life in general was like before the tragedy. I feel like knowing a bit more backstory would have made their separation more heartbreaking, and I don't think it would interrupt the flow of the story.

One final thought I had about Dominya was that I thought it might have been nice if the age difference between her and Thea was clarified earlier in the story. I think the fact that she is an adult while Thea is around eight is an important part of the dynamic of their living situation and could clarify a lot about it.

MAGGIE: From the moment Maggie is introduced, it is clear she is a good hearted, but perhaps somewhat naïve, character. She and Eddie are running for their lives, but she still shows concern for Thea, who is at this point a stranger to her, and takes the time to warn her.

Throughout chapters four and five, Maggie acts as a great contrast to Eddie. While Eddie is more reserved and comes across as mean, Maggie is compassionate and works her best to convince Eddie to allow Thea into their group. I love the dynamic between these two characters. Their disagreements make for great plot development, but at the same time the strong bond they share is clearly evident through the way they look out for each other.

EDDIE: Eddie is perhaps my favorite character in the story so far. He is complex, but at the same time his motivations and the reasons he acts the way he does are very understandable. His character makes sense without him ever having to be explained.

Through the chapters I've read, Eddie has maintained a tough exterior, refusing to let anyone in emotionally. However, it is clear he cares deeply about Maggie and the other orphans. At a very young age, Eddie has taken on a lot of responsibility, tasking himself with taking care of the orphans. He doesn't allow himself to open up to people because he can't risk it. He always needs to be aware and vigilant. Unlike Maggie who unconditionally trusts Thea, Eddie doesn't have this option. Instead, at first, he wants nothing to do with her because she risks the well being of the children he has tasked himself to protect. With convincing from Maggie, he eventually allows her to stay.

I think Eddie will take a while to warm up to Thea, but once he does, he will become a strong and important ally.

Description/World Building: A Game of Survival is filled with wonderfully vivid descriptions. One of my favorite descriptions was Thea's crying in chapter one. Her crying is not pretty, but it is realistic, and I think that makes her situation hit home that much more. Another description I loved was the creepy and eerie appearance of Hel in chapter two. I found it very vivid and haunting. Another description I really liked was the guards terrorizing the town in chapter two, particularly the detail of the man's head hitting the woman. I thought this description was well done because it wasn't gratuitously gory, but there was a strong emotional impact. Finally, I loved the way the magical force Thea experiences in chapter five was described. It was creepy and mysterious. I particularly thought the detail of her actually seeing a glowing chord connecting her to Eddie was well done.

Because the story is written in third person omniscient, some of the writing style felt unusual to me. This is likely because I do not typically read stories in the omniscient POV. It seemed like the descriptions relied heavily on filtering (directly telling what each character was feeling or sensing) rather than showing their feelings. However, the style is consistent and intentional throughout the story.

I appreciate the worldbuilding in A Game of Survival. The author has done an excellent job of dispersing information about the world throughout the story rather than info dumping to directly tell the reader history and backstory. That said, I might have appreciated a bit more backstory sprinkled throughout the chapters. For example, are all women able to have children with the Magi gene, or just certain women? Additionally, I might have liked more information about the world as a whole. I understand that the main city is known as Kingsland. How far from the town where Thea grew up is Kingsland? Are there other cities and towns? Other kingdoms? I thought just a bit more information about that in-story could have been nice (although there is a particularly beautiful and informative map included at the beginning of the story!)

Plot: My favorite thing about the plot was how unpredictable it was, yet how it all flowed so smoothly. The plot built suspense right from the beginning, throwing the reader into the action of the guards coming to take Thea and her sister. I felt Thea and her sister's panic as Dominya was trying to disguise Thea as a boy. I felt the terror as Dominya was taken away.

When Thea is left for dead and the demon Hel comes to her, things started to get a bit muddled, but in a great way. The narration was all over the place, but it gave a sense of chaos that put me into Thea's position of terror.

My favorite plot twist was when Hel abruptly leaves Thea in only chapter four. After such an extensive introduction, I was expecting Hel to stick around for possibly the entire story, so I was definitely not expecting her to leave Thea so quickly. However, I suspect that we haven't seen the last of Hel.

I also liked how there were no lose ends or dropped plot points in the story so far. For example, when Thea is in the market she encounters Jiran. At first, I was wondering what the point of her encounter with him was, since after speaking with him she goes on her way almost as if nothing has happened. However, when Thea encounters him again when she is learning the be a thief with Eddie, it all came together!

There were a few areas where I thought the plot could have used a bit more development. First, in chapter one the guard lets Thea get away even though he knows she is a girl. I thought this was a huge oversight on his part. It seems like it would have been just as easy for him to take her with them, so why risk it? I thought the plot would have made more sense if he hadn't realized she was a girl. I think the same sentiments about her being "weak" could still be accomplished even if he thought she was a boy. He could have focused more on the fact that "Theo" was weak because could do nothing to help his sister.

The break between chapters two and three felt a bit abrupt to me. I might have liked a bit more detail or a summarization of what Thea had been up to during the three months before Hel determined she was ready to go to Kingsland. I think it might have made for an easier transition into the chapter to know at least where Thea had been staying and what sort of things she had been up to.

Finally, the fact that many of the characters are able to tell that Thea is a girl just by her voice seemed a bit odd to me. Thea attempts to put on a deeper voice to pretend that she is a boy. This may just be my perception, but I feel like the voices of young children regardless of gender are often difficult to distinguish. They are fairly varied across all children, not just by gender, so it seemed odd to me that characters could be so certain that she was a girl just from her voice.

Summary: A Game of Survival is a dark and thought-provoking fantasy story. The plot is unpredictable and full of twists and turns. With intense descriptions and a varied cast of characters, the first five chapters of this story are a thrill to read!