My realizations for today:

As I knew how to value myself,
Validate my emotions,
That I have to protect my mental health,
And I can freely express what I feel...

I became selfish.

I forgot how to understand other's opinion
How to read the room
How to be extra sensitive towards them.

This is why trauma is a real bitch.

I have no respect for myself back then. I invalidate my thoughts often. I don't want to voice out what's inside my head. I don't prioritize what I feel. I was told I was just complaining and fighting even if I was just venting.

Now I understood. This is a balance challenge for me. I promise I will work harder to be better. It won't be that easy because of my past but I will never stop learning. I will never stop loving myself and respecting others at the same time. <3