First and foremost, I’d like to welcome my readers from different countries. To my readers in USA, Philippines, Canada, Nigeria, UK, South Africa, India, Jamaica, Dominican Republic, France, Germany, Ghana, Kenya, Jordan, Lebanon, Oman, Qatar, Azerbaijan, and Australia; welcome. I hope you enjoy reading RATIONAL LOVE.
 
 
 
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The wind had started howling. Dust was swirling about one feet above the ground. The pungent taste that resulted from that made me want to spit out. It was drizzling yet the sun rose higher in the sky.

The principal pressed a button on the left hand side of the school hall door and a mechanical female voice answered, “Emergency lockdown cancelled. All doors are being opened at the moment.”

The door opened and the vice principal ended her speech with, “Thank you for your time.”

A guard walked behind the principal, rolling my box while two women rushed out with their miniskirts and clanking stilettos.

“How can there be an emergency lockdown when there's no emergency?” one said.

“One day the security in this school will be the death of it,” the other replied, shaking her head.

I was frozen to the ground like an ice statue. My feet felt heavy. Part of the dust clung to the hair on my skin and left a prickling feeling. My mind was going in circles.

Blood. Leg. White cloth. Stretcher. Blood. Leg. Oh my.

Who was lying on that stretcher?

What should I do? The principal knew I was telling a lie and might do something about it. He always said ‘fine’ before a punishment.

Should I follow Mum or should I follow the principal and hope he would forget it? Who was I kidding? The principal would definitely not forget it and if I follow Mum, there were too many cameras and guards. The cameras on the buildings and street lamp poles would alert security that I was fleeing school with the motorised tricycles.

The principal turned to me. I quickly smiled broadly and took trepid steps towards the hall door - my new gate of hell.

In the hall, the principal's droning recorded voice came through the speakers. "All students are expected to abide by the rules. Do not bring food items to school. Do not bring custom made uniforms. Flashy jewellery and accessories are not allowed. No footwear should be higher than two inches."

"All other school rules will be given to students during the general assembly by 4pm. Every student is expected to be there. Any student caught disobeying school rules will be given the appropriate punishment. Welcome to Madeline Secondary School. Of course, we are one of the best schools in our country Bramergy and we are proud of our heri..."

I tuned the voice out.

People were scanty in the hall which was divided into two by an invisible line. A clock chimed eight o'clock on the wall above the line. On one side, female students took their boxes to be inspected while the other side was for males.

There were one or two tables for each year and a non-academic staff behind them. I couldn't see any student at the year five table but the guard placed my box on a table with no marking.

By this time, the free bus had arrived and students like me filed out of it. They lined up behind me irrespective of which year they were in.

The principal was at another side of the hall. That was a good sign. All I needed to do was pretend this never happened. How hard could it be to delete the sight of blood from my mind? I once deleted worse.

I closed my eyes and breathed in and out slowly. I read somewhere that the best way to forget disturbing memories is to replace them with happy ones.

The image of Tavy’s warm smile, her twinkling eyes and winks came to me. Her high pitched laughter rang in my brain and that did it. I opened my eyes smiling. Happy thoughts.

The staff ransacked my box and took out everything she said could possibly be breaking the rules - creams, liquid soaps, the white shirt Tavy gave me last term, my red lace undies, and any toiletry, cosmetic or accessory she felt was too flashy.

From the corner of my eyes, I could see girls that were not like me putting their designer white shirts and custom made school uniforms back into their boxes. Their flashy jewellery and accessories were on top of their open boxes in full display for everyone in the hall to see.

I wished Tavy had come to school with me. I would have put all these things in her box and none of them would have been taken.

The staff picked my perfume box and I stared at it, blinking rapidly.

She opened it and brought out a folded comb studded with gemstones.

She shook her head. "Riley, you should know better than this."

She tossed it on top of my other not-allowed items.

All my happy thoughts vanished.

Without thinking, I picked it up and held it behind my back. I had spent most of my savings buying this comb and now they wanted to take it away.

"Riley, give me that comb."

"No." I could pretend it was their business to do whatever they wanted with a bloodied body but I wouldn't let them seize the comb.

"Riley Visions, drop that comb on the table."

"No."

The image of the leg in the stretcher came back to me bigger and stronger. In my imagination, it was as big as the van and guards holding planks were walking beside it to cover it. And that made me wonder - why did the principal hide that body? Who were they to take my comb when they were engaging in suspicious activities?

Her voice rose. "Having that comb in your possession is against the school rules."

My voice rose. "It's not against the rules. How come the other girls' pretty flashy things were not taken?"

Boxes quickly closed around me and sounds of zips could be heard.

"Riley Visions, I will say this for the last time. Give. Me. That. Comb."

"No! It's Tavy's comb. I won't give it to you. Besides, all we do here is pretend. Just now, outside this hall… "

I felt a strong grip on my shoulder and the comb being pried out of my hands. The comb was dropped into my box and the principal looked at me with his plastic smile.

Immediately, the image of the humongous leg disappeared and I felt a burning sensation in my chest, the heat rising with each passing second.

"Riley, say sorry," he said quietly and icily.

I looked away. "I'm sorry."

The staff zipped my box, placed my nametag on it and put it in a trolley.

"Make sure you see the seamstress for a new set of uniforms and collect your books for the term," she said as the principal used his hurting grip to make me follow him.

He stopped in front of a man and smiled.

"Mr Paul, sorry for the interruption. As I was saying, our philanthropic activities are not false. We pick underprivileged and undeserving children and give them the rich and complete education that Madeline offers. Riley, here, is an example. She was given a half scholarship and she is the first student that has been awarded a full scholarship which will take effect this term."

"And we don't stop at academic education. We train a child in all areas. When Riley was first admitted, she exhibited truant and unstable behaviour and blatant disregard for school rules. You can't blame her for that considering where she's coming from..."

My hands balled into fists. I looked around. Where was Tavy when I needed her?

The hand on my shoulder tightened.

I breathed in and out slowly. There was no need to cause a scene. All I needed to do was turn my face into a mask and drown his voice out by singing a tune in my head. I didn't succeed.

"...but we've groomed her well,” he said. “Now, she can apologise when she's wrong and her life has improved. If we can make Riley a lucky girl by giving her the best education she could only dream of, if we can give all that Madeline offers without asking for a penny; how much more do you think we will invest into the sons and daughters of parents like you who pay the full fees. Consider bringing your four children here. We give the best all-round education in the country. I'll call you on Monday to know if you've made your decision."

My shoulders sagged. It was happening again - the poster child experience.

A little boy that couldn't be older than three years tapped my leg and smiled up at me. His hand reached out to me, trusting. He was still oblivious to the harm in the world.

This was how I must have been before those boys struck and my brain wiped off my memory of one year. Before I grew up and started fighting images of blood to force them to the back of my mind.

He tapped me a second time and grinned. The gesture brought a smile to my face and I took his hand wishing I could have what he had - blissful inner peace. Real life came calling and a woman pulled him away from me.

"Such people shouldn't school at Madeline. Madeline is for the cream of the crop," she said.

"Of course, of course, Madeline is for the cream of the crop," the principal said, "but if you see beggars on the street, will you refrain from taking pity on them and helping them? Riley shouldn't be here but she's lucky we found her. Without Madeline, she would have had a mediocre education but we've given her the best..."

And he continued speaking, his voice getting louder and more animated as he took me from one parent to the other. He went on and on and on. Then he washed, rinsed and repeated it with more embellished words.

I should have gotten used to this by now. He did this every term. His words were the torture whip that cracked my soul and tore it to pieces, leaving the fragments for vultures to devour.

But my hands were shaking, my lips trembling slightly. I bent my head down, willing myself not to let any tear flow.

I should have left that comb; then I would have slipped out of the hall without the principal getting to me. No, there was no way I would have left the comb. Maybe I should have insisted that Mum come into the hall with me. If she used her precious fuel to drive me to school despite the availability of the free bus, she would have agreed to go late to work because of me.

The principal squeezed my shoulder hard.

My eyes watered. I blinked back tears. I wasn't going to give Mr High and Mighty the privilege of knowing that he had gotten under my skin.

"Good afternoon Sir," he said.

"Good afternoon Sir," I said, not looking up to see who I was greeting.

"Thank you for your donations towards Madeline Scholarship Foundation," he said, "Riley is the first beneficiary of your benevolence. This is her fifth year here."

The first thing that crossed my mind was: "Hold on. I'm meeting the sponsor of Madeline Scholarship Foundation?"

I looked up at the man. His eyes were glinting with pride. He was... he was looking at me like... I've seen that look somewhere. He was looking at me like I was a prize!

I looked at the other adults and parents. Was this what I was to them? A thing to be handled and won?

Some of them looked at me with pity. Others had disgust on their faces like they could barely tolerate me. Some were smiling at me.

Come to think of it, the droning recorded voice of the principal had stopped playing and the real life voice had taken its place. It was booming across the hall and everyone was paying attention.

I was the poster child again.

I was the Africa with pictures and exhibitions of my academic kwashiorkor state laid bare for the world to see. Madeline was the NGO saviour that had donated 'all-round education' to save me.

Why wouldn't they leave me alone? Was it a crime to get a scholarship? Was it a crime to want the best for myself? Did I beg to be born this way? Did I ask to come into my family? Was it a crime for my family not to have as much money as all these rich people?

"Thank you Sir," the principal said and let go of my shoulders.

I turned and walked across the hall to the female section as the clock chimed ten o'clock.

I blinked back the tears threatening to push out from my tear glands. I refused to give the principal the satisfaction of seeing my tears. I wouldn't give him the opportunity to call me unstable and truant. I wouldn't.

I made my way to my scholarship mates - the people like me. There were only two left in the hall. They moved back as I came close to them, looking everywhere else but me.

I chuckled. So this was what it had come to? I was now the Ebola among the plagues; the person the principal decided to use as an example.

I walked to the door of the school hall and saw the 24" x 36" poster of myself in year one hanging at the far end of the staff building. On it was written 'Madeline Scholarship Fund - We give every child an opportunity for the best all-round education'.

When I stepped outside, I let the rain drench my uniform. It's huge drops splattered on my skin, washing away the dust on my face and neck. I looked up mesmerised, praying desperately that it would wash me away to an island filled with fountains, birds, fruits and tall green beautiful grasses. An island where my mind would soak its beauty and love.

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Hope you enjoyed it. Tell me what you think. I kinda feel sorry for Riley right now.

Please comment and vote to let me know how you feel.