Hi everyone. Thanks for all the feedback and votes up to now. Let me know what you think/feel. Dont forget to vote. xoxox

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I serve to pull you closer, as I would upon any cloak or coat, when the winds and elements seek to bite at my flesh. I seek to know your love once more, my steps some times hurried in eager anticipation that they will bring me closer to you. The thick taste of shame and anguish is within my mouth.

How long has it been since I felt the suns rays upon my skin, serving to warm me as well as comfort me.

I dare not admit on how many granules of sand have ebbed through that ever present glass of time. I have felt the sand beneath my feet, seeking to suck me in, to make me forgotten and unknown to my self, the immense love within me ever bright and unconditional never knowing or to be known.

Panic and fear have been my constant companions, because in my eyes I feel I am so separate to your love, your truth and infinite wisdom.

Here I am waiting and watching, my heart soul and mind crying out to you. Why! I dare not confess on how my path has been a lonely one, how my existence is that of a somewhat hollow and meaningless.

When I look to my self in any reflection or mirrored surface, I do not see what I am. I see what I have become. The lies, the hurt, the constant pain, yet I go on, yet another step, another mountain another twisting road of solitude.

I wish not to speak another word, to breath another breath, in each inhale and exhale I am reminded that what is around me is not the truth, it is not who I am, who I truly am.

In the night I cry your name, like a child frightened of the dark, my hands reach out to you, to be pulled into your embrace and your love. Yet I find nothing, a constant void, where witness the images of my own demons, my own fears and lies. My head in my hands, I bite down the tears, holding back that torrent which threatens to burst through my chest like a thousand blades

I stand alone on my own bloody, battle field where spirits of past, present and yet to come lay, their hands reaching towards me, in their hope to be heard, in expectancy of forgiveness and redemption.

I mistrust the words they have to offer I mistrust my self when it comes to me allowing them to speak, What will happen to me, what will transcend, will I become what I have ignored, what I have feared and run away from?

Will I be forgotten, to loose my self, to loose hope that everything will be ok? Here and now I crave your touch, your reverent caress and words of gentleness, my heart is like a heavy stone within my chest, threatening to tighten the noose of torment around my neck.

My soul I see as a murder of crows perched upon a barren and lifeless tree, their eyes piercing into my own, I can not look, I am unable to stand by that tree, to give it life once again, for flowers to bloom once again, for fruit to ripen.

The snake is coiling its self around me, hissing into my conscience, its forked tongue seen in my dreams and every waking moment.

A voice told me the snake is knowing, wise and cunning, that same voice told me the tree is waiting for me to give it life.

To breathe my love upon it. That sound was so warm, and inviting like slipping into a bath. I seem to recall I have heard this voice so many times before, but with those upon the field of ignorance and fear I learned to ignore them, to push away their invitations and blessings.

Should I open the flood gate, place my key within the rusty lock of my heart, to permit light to once again enter into that void I call my being.

Dare I allow my breath to deepen, to become one with your own, for my sight to be unveiled by the masks I wear, to remove the cloak of false projection, belief and sorrow from my shoulders, so I can feel the glorious sun upon it.

What do I fear, what is my deepest shame, perhaps not to know love or to know you once again?

Namaste