The moment Ban had put me down on the ground, I had stormed off to the bedroom, only stopping for a  split second to reassure King, who had started fussing. I didn't want to chance running into Meliodas if he decided to return, so I just stayed in that kitschy room until the crack of dawn, finally venturing downstairs to make some food.

I felt pretty guilty seeing Ban sprawled over one of the tables, head and feet dangling off each end in such an uncomfortable display, but then I remembered how he had treated me the evening before. Bitch could suffer. King, on the other hand, didn't look all too phased. He at least had his Chastiefol to use as a makeshift bed.

Behind the counter, I found that we had stocked up on ingredients, so I chose to start cooking some eggs and greens (If you're vegan choose what you prefer) for the lot of us, my frustrations having simmered down a fair amount after having time to myself.

I wasn't the best cook, by any stretch of the imagination, but I wasn't horrible. I could produce something edible if I tried hard enough, and the only person I knew who could screw up something so simple would be...

Dammit, don't think about him...

"Well, something smells appetizing." I looked up from the sizzling pan, locking eyes with the familiar temptress, who was closing the door behind her. By her side stood someone I had never seen before. "Would you mind if we joined you for breakfast?"
"Knock yourself out..." I murmured, keeping my eyes on the stranger who made himself at home at one of the tables. He was one of the cutest guys I had ever seen, coming from a completely innocent region of my mind. "Who's this?"

"How rude of me!" The man; or rather boy, stood, bowing to me from across the room. "I am Arthur Pendragon, king of Camelot. You must be Lady (Y/N). Merlin has sung your praises many'a times!" I felt a little taken aback, turning to Merlin as I pointed to the royal.
"We're keeping him, right?"

Merlin chuckled, approaching me as Arthur sat back down, still smiling at me.
"I never knew you to be a flirt, (Y/N)..." She whispered teasingly, making my face heat up. As she reached to pull a piece of bell-pepper from the pan I swatted her hand with my utensil, warding her off.
"I..I'm not! What is he? Like, ten?" I whisper shouted back, beginning to remove the first batch of eggs.

"Uh, I'm sixteen, but I assure you, I'm far from immature!" Arthur piped up, letting us know we weren't being at all secretive. "Well, most of the time..." I avoided his vibrant violet eyes as I plated up their food, motioning to Merlin to follow as I carried it over.
"I'm not as good as Ban when it comes to cooking, so I hope it tastes okay..." I admitted as I set it in front of the young king.

"Do my ears detect a hint of praise?~" Speaking of the devil, a loud crack echoed through the Boar Hat as Ban stretched, likely snapping a few bones out of place as he rolled off the table to his feet. Scowling, I returned to my original station, aggressively flipping an egg.
"No, but they might detect the sound of me spitting in your breakfast..." I growled, not wishing to deal with his smarmy attitude so early in the morning.

"Hold the spit. I'm not too fond of the taste of bitter bitch." He retorted smoothly, catching my spatula as it came flying towards his face.
"Come now, you two. At least wait until noon to start a quarrel..." Merlin sighed, taking a mouthful of food. "I'm relieved I knocked those bad kitchen habits out of you when I did, otherwise who knows how this would taste."

Ban sauntered up to the counter, handing over my spatula, but he didn't let it go. Narrowing my (E/C) eyes, I tugged again, but he had me beat in the strength department. At least, in that moment he did.
"Want some help, tree-hugger?~" He cooed, leaning forward with a smirk I was growing to hate.
"Not from someone who can't even come up with a decent insult." I bit back, stumbling backwards a little when he decided to let go.

This guy is almost as obnoxious as Melly...

"I smell food..." My demeanor changed as I heard a squeaky yawn, noticing our minor dispute had woken up the petite fairy boy. Scraping eggs and greens onto another plate, I waved it in the air, tempting him.
"Come and get it, sleepy head." I smiled, finding it kind of endearing as he floated over sluggishly. He thanked me with a smile, just floating away to nibble as he woke up a bit more.

"You doing better today?" Ban's whispered question took me off guard, and he looked fairly amused as I held up my spatula as some kind of weapon.
"I'm sore as fuck, and considering reporting you to a Holy Knight for treating me like a ragdoll last night." I muttered, staring at the egg yolk in front of me as it bubbled, just like I had been on the inside the day before.

"You make it sound like something a bit kinkier when you put it that way..." He purred, and this time I actually smacked him with the utensil.
"Is everything okay over there, Lady (Y/N)?" Arthur called out, looking a little unsure.
"Everything's peachy. My companion here just had a bit of bullshit on his face." I chimed back, using a cloth to wipe the business end of the spatula, because only god knew where the man had been.

Scoffing, Ban leant closer, tapping the counter with his index finger.
"For real, though. You looked pretty ragged yesterday." He said quietly, looking me up and down. "I don't care all too much, but I just wanna know that you aren't, like, planning anything stupid just because you lost some dumb bet."

Is this fucker for real?

"The whole reason I didn't wanna rejoin this damn group was to avoid doing stupid shit." I said as I clicked my tongue, watching the steam rise from the cooktop.
"Sure, I get that." He replied coolly, rolling his broad shoulders until he; and everyone in the room, heard a loud pop. "I was gonna be nice and say you could come along with me to deliver some ale to the other bars and pubs around the city~"

"That's a hard pass." I responded bluntly, shoving the still-hot spatula into his chest and rounding the counter. "I don't plan on leaving here unless your cunty captain comes back." Leaving him to serve his own meal, I went to sit with Merlin and Arthur, resting my cheek on the table.
"Mind your manners, (Y/N)." Merlin scolded half-heartedly. "You are in the presence of royalty, after all."

Begrudgingly, I straightened up, poking my tongue out at the woman.
"You're such a mother." I complained, though secretly it was kind of a compliment, and she knew it. Dabbing at his mouth with a napkin; a rare sight at the Boar Hat, Arthur turned to me, his pearly whites gleaming almost as brightly as his eyes.

"I was hoping to explore Liones today, but Merlin has a prior engagement to tend to, and she refuses to let me wander around on my own. Would you like to join me, Lady (Y/N)?" I was a little surprised at his offer, but Merlin didn't sound all too thrilled.
"The two of you combined would be utter chaos. I've known both of you since you were knee high, and I can already sense you would cause a great disturbance."

Ouch. I mean, I get it, but ouch, Merl.

"Good luck getting the angst machine to go anywhere. She won't go with m-"
"I think that sounds like a great idea." I cut Ban off, slightly turning to give him a nasty smirk. He looked offended, and that was exactly what I had hoped for. Besides, Arthur seemed like a cool kid. It could be fun.

Standing up, the youthful king extended his hand to me, and I didn't hesitate, allowing him to help me to my feet.
"Come on, Lady Merlin! We can take care of ourselves!" He was acting like a pleading kid, and it was beyond adorable. I mimicked his puppy dog eyes, fluttering my lashes.
"Yeah, come on, Mama Merl! We'll be super duper good!"

The temptress heaved a long, defeated sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose.
"I can already tell there is no way to stop you two...Just make sure you're both on your best behaviour, and don't-"
"Don't cause mayhem, yeah, we know!" I finished her sentence, grabbing Arthur's hand and dragging him towards the door.

I narrowly avoided the half gourd that flew at my head, smashing against the wall.
"Oi, what gives?! I've got actual work for you to do!" Ban snapped, his lip curled back in a sneer. Shrugging, I had a hand on each of Arthur's shoulders, pushing him out the door.

"Oh, did I forget to mention? I don't work with giant undead bitches!"

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***Oops, Ban shouldn't have carried you off like that last chapter, no matter how much we enjoyed it!

I love Arthur so freaking much. He's too cute. Too pure. He's baby.

Next Time: Totally Not Trouble***