I would've hated going to some places because I see them there but I don't. There are so many people that I care about that I can put over them.

I wish they could see this and instead of being disappointed in me, praise my works. They used to but I think it's all my Undertale phase's fault. Or maybe mine.

I wish I could tell them that I cried every night they started fighting with me over staying up late.

How I cried when they were glaring at me when I hugged a friend of mine. How the F*CK did you come to the conclusion that they had a crush on me? As far as I know, they don't. And even if they did, you don't do that to your friends.

But I want to be there for them too. Maybe it's because I don't have anyone else to talk to who knows personal things about me (not in a bad way).

My past self was too trusting.

I'm not gonna blame her though. It's still my fault. Instead, I'm gonna wish I had her personality again. Maybe if I wasn't so anti-social then people wouldn't criticize my parents. I wish I could change but I just can't. It's not something that happens in a year. In a few years, more like. I can't just magically change my personality.

People tell me I act mature for my age. Maybe that's why they were probably interested in me.

...now that I think about it, I don't think saying 'possessive friend' would suffice anymore.

But I don't want to act like a little child when the people my age act mature. Well...maybe it's just me. Some do I guess. My stupid ass puberty came earlier than expected so I guess my mind is stuck between sticking with acting my age and sticking to an adult mind.

Some people have got it worse than me though. More than 3/4 of the time these thoughts don't even cross my mind.

Maybe it's just me.