Written August 5, 2021.

I did an update on this several years ago. I think I actually wrote it in 2018, then posted it sometime in late 2019.

I was looking at that when I came back on here and I was like whoa, wait a minute. It's no longer accurate.

There's one thing I want to briefly bring up before we begin. In the first update, and for most of my life, I identified as 'legally blind'. That basically means that, with the best correction, a person can only see at or below the level of twenty-two-hundred. Some people at this point simply identify as blind, as this is where the blind community technically begins.

I was always a 'legally blind' individual, because I used to believe that I had too much sight to be called blind.

The 'legally' in this part title is in parentheses for a reason. Yes, it could still be used to describe me, but I am no longer identifying myself in that way.

I've been watching a lot of blind YouTubers, and learning a lot from the community as a whole.

What I have learned is this: I'm Nicole and Nicole is blind, and that's okay.

When I posted that first update, it was because I was ready to talk about this. Now, I feel like it's only fair to keep anyone who's curious up to date.

It doesn't make me less capable on here or anywhere else, and as far as this site goes I've pretty much learned to accommodate myself.

For anyone who wants to know why I've gone blind, I actually have several conditions. Most of those I have had since birth. However, what caused the deterioration was a recent issue that started during my first semester of college. I have a complete retina detachment in my left eye, and a funnel retina detachment in my right eye. If you want to know more about that, I recommend Google. It definitely knows more than I do.

I've included examples from my first update so that you, and I, can see the change.

New answers will be in bold like this.

Old answers will be in normal font.

~*~

Vision in my left eye is straightforward; all I see is grey.

This is still true. It won't change. It's literally as bad as it can get. It's been like that for a while though; my left eye had been my 'worst eye' for as long as I can remember.

In my right eye, I do have a bit of vision still. There is a white film over everything I see, and I don't have any peripheral vision. That means, if I want to look to either side, I pretty much have to turn my head. I'm able to see colors/shapes, and some details if I'm quite close up. Like, I can see the color/shape of something if I hold it relatively close to my face.

I still don't have any peripheral vision. The far left and far right sections of my right eye, where the periphery would be, are just grey. Those sections look exactly like the grey I see in my entire left eye. There is still a white film over the majority of my central vision. I have general light/shadow perception in that whole area. If I want to look through it, it's extremely hard.

I have a tiny, vertical section in my central vision that I can see through semi successfully. I can get some shapes/colors through that, but it's nothing to brag about. It's basically like looking through a straw, I think.

If I look straight down at all, my vision will go completely grey. Even if I tilt my head down instead of just moving my eye, nine times out of ten it'll still just be grey. Something similar happens when I'm in strong sunlight when the rays are direct. The bright rays will cause a kind of visual greyout over all of my remaining vision.

If I'm too far away, whatever I'm trying to look at just looks like a blur, or a shadow, depending on what sort of lighting I'm in.

If I'm too far away, it won't register at all. I can sense things on either side of me sometimes, but it's more of an echolocation thing that my body has adapted. The general description I give is, if it's not a light/shadow, I can only see about six inches in front of my face and there's very little clarity.

If I'm trying to look at something on my phone, I usually have to hold it right up next to my nose.

Still true. Clarity-wise, sometimes it's easier on my phone. Still, shapes and some colors are as far as it goes. My screen reader catches a lot of text and things like that, so typing and reading isn't an issue.

I'm pretty good with colors, but if they're similar, sometimes it's hard to differentiate them. Like, white/tan/cream sometimes look the same for me, as do certain shades of red/orange or blue/green.

If I'm having a one hundred percent perfect day, this is accurate. When I'm on my game, sometimes I can tell that the blue on my phone case is different from the bluish color on one of my purses.

Most of the time, it's not like that. Similar colors look the same to me a lot. I have to ask someone about the laundry, because if something's white/tan/cream/pale yellow or grey, it'll all look tan or grey. It's super frustrating, and something I struggled to adjust to. So, I'm always afraid that I'll throw something grey in with the whites, or something like that.

Pink/orange/red and blue/green can be a problem, too.

I have a really difficult time with facial features, which is weird considering how intent I am on describing characters in my stories. I could see this sort of thing a bit better when I was younger, so I have a bit of visual memory, but nowadays the only way I can see any sort of facial detail is if I'm looking at a picture close-up on my phone. Then, I can see the hair/eye color with some success..

Still have a good visual memory (helps that I'm a visual thinker), so descriptions are fine. I can't see this at all anymore, though. Doesn't matter how big I make the magnifier or how I turn my head compared to the image.

As for pictures in general, if someone tells me what I'm looking for, I'm pretty decent at putting together the pieces. If I'm shown something with no context, I may have a difficult time trying to piece together what I see to form a complete image. If you send me a picture with a lot of white, blue, and brown, there are a lot of things that it could be. If you tell me that the picture was taken on the beach, then I've got some context. With that information, I can say all right, I see where the sand, ocean, and sky are and understand where they meet.

Again, no longer accurate. I get shapes/colors if I'm really working hard, but that can be tiring with the tiny slice of vision I have to use for it. My screen reader catches any text, and I have an app that's decent at describing details like scenery.

I'm planning to try that out when I get new covers on here, along with having someone describe them.

To give you an idea of how my picture-viewing skills work, I recently got into beading and have been picking them out mostly by myself. The website has a picture of each strand of beads whenever you click on the product link. I would click on a set of beads that sounded like it would be a cute shape/color, then magnify my screen to the maximum size. I then go bead by bead, checking them out as best I can. It's exhausting, but it means I can narrow down my selections a little bit before I search for outside description help.

Afterward, I always send someone a picture to verify, and run the image through my description app.

I'm able to take pictures with my phone or iPad... but the quality widely varies, especially if I'm trying to take a picture of a moving target.

Still pretty accurate. I've figured out that you don't need twenty-twenty vision, or even twenty-two-thousand vision, to take a photo. Mine probably aren't professional quality, and sometimes I'll let someone else take them, but it's manageable. Honestly, I'd say a lot of abled people struggle with camera angles too, so I don't worry too much about it.

I'm good at positioning, and I have an app that'll tell me if I got a picture of what I was aiming at.

With my covers, I usually blow up the image/text, look closely at it, and have someone explain what they see in case I'm missing a key detail.

I'll still be doing this, but I'm also going to have my picture-recognizing app tell me what it sees.

When I read/write, I have to do so on a phone or iPad.

Still true. I'm going to do more posts about this, when I figure out how to explain it well. Generally, I use Apple Voiceover on my iPhone and iPads. I also use my Bluetooth keyboards for the iPads. I recently got a Braille display that I could use to write/edit on any of my devices, but I had to send it back. I should be getting a new one soon, though. I may post a picture for anyone who wants to know what that looks like.

In terms of writing and reading on here, I don't honestly think my lack of vision matters a whole lot. I miss grammar errors sometimes, just like any normal human. I have to get someone to make my covers, but a lot of people do that on here.

I still can write reviews, and edit for other people's typos. I have my ways, and I'm still pretty accurate.