Kace: Hit or miss-

Seth: *violently waving a whiskey bottle* DEPRESSION IS A BITCH, HUH?

*

Raine: *sneezes*

Evan: hey, someone's thinking about you.

Raine: yeah, it's god cursing my existence.

*

Aria: All women are queens.

Koemi, shit drunk: IF SHE BREATHES SHE IS A THOT

*

Kace: how do you sleep at night knowing there are people who despise you?

Seth: With no underwear in case they wanna kiss my ass.

*

Random stranger: what's your body type?

Raine: not really outta shape but you can see I like pasta and I get unnecessarily winded after two flights of stairs.

*

Nelly: *sneezes*

Ren, from the kitchen: Bless you.

Nelly, incredulously: god?

*

Lorenzo: *hugs Miori*

Miori: what is this?

Lorenzo: Affection.

Miori: disgusting, do it again.

*

Dia: and now for my queen! I shall choose the most fairest and beautiful of the town's females!

Miori: I'm afraid of commitment-

Dia, lying: I DIDN'T MEAN YOU-

*

Artreaus: nice joke, bro, now I'm insecure.

*

Yūno: I am a peddler of freckled men.

Toshiko: pray, show me your wares.

Yūno: *presents Takaya*

Toshiko: *frantically fumbling for her purse* I HAVE COIN-

*

Daisuke to Elise: whoa, are you from France? Cause madamn.

Elise: *French panic*

*

Kei: Bro, you want this pamphlet?

Shiro: Brochure.

*

Mrs Martinez after adopting Miori: BEHOLD. MY BILINGUAL, 6FT, JAPANESE DAUGHTER.

*

Daisuke, high as fuck: maybe life isn't about finding the right lamp, it's about finding the lamp inside yourself.

Haruya: bro you need help.

*

Raine: sometimes I wish I looked fragile and dainty, but I do love looking like I hate everybody.

*

Cyrene, Evan, Lorezo and Raine as a friend group.

They only have four brain cells and Cyrene has like three-

*

Toshiko: huh, where's your freckles? Are you wearing makeup?

Takaya: no, it's winter so my freckles fade.

Toshiko: oh

Later

Toshiko: *kicking the snow* give. Him. Back. His. Freckles. You. Bitch.

*

Ayame: When I die, donate my entire body to science.

Ayame: besides my middle finger, send that to Zeus.

*

Yūno: Hey are you from Tennessee?

Miori: no-

Yūno: Cause you're the only TEN I SEE!

Miori: WE'RE FUCKING JAPANESE, RINZAKI-

*

Kei: Hey, bro, can you do me a favour?

Shiro: yeah, what's up?

Kei: when I die, can you tell people that I'm chilling with Jesus?

*

Finnian: good morning, mother figure.

Koemi: good morning, problem child.

*

Lorenzo: I dare you to kiss the prettiest person in this room.

Cyrene: Evan?

Evan, red in the face: yes?

Cyrene: move over I need to kiss Raine.

*

Rowan: 80% water, 20% pizza, 100% swag.

Esbern: that's 200%

Rowan: I'm twice the man you'll ever be.

*

Koemi, drunk as hell: *points at Aria* that's my boyfriend, suckers!

Balthazar, quietly: husband, milady...

Koemi: Husband, eVEN BETTER-

*

Dia: hey can I ask you something?

Koemi: go on.

Koemi: only if I concentrate really hard.

Dia: can you read my mi-

Dia: soN OF A BITCH

*

Raine: good morning, everyone. God has let me live another day. Now I'm gonna make it everyone's problem.

*

Kidnapper: we have your son.

Cyrene: I have no son.

Kidnapper: then who made us cut the crusts off his sandwich and asked for chocolate milk?

Cyrene: Oh my god, you have Evan-

*

Kace: *makes Edan play Dream Daddy*

Edan: *talking about Joseph* oh, he is fine.

Kace: He's married.

Edan: Not for long.

Kace: DAD-

(Will update if I find more-)