I've been thinking about a few things over the last couple of weeks. I was debating whether or not to reach out to my ex best friend to try and rebuild the relationship. But I'm afraid if it's too long. The last we spoke was between 2014-2015 and haven't seen each other since. What happened was that we had a major fight during the night over messager and we just drifted away. He was one of my childhood friends and for years we had many up and downs but this struck hard. Well to be honest I've only had 3 childhood friends, two being girls and one a guy. I just had this feeling I should talk to him but at the same time feel that I shouldn't. I also get the feeling that I should visit him since he hasn't moved. No I haven't been stalking. His family hasn't moved their entire lives and I know for a fact they won't let him move out without a proper job and income. I've seen the arguments. Not very pretty.

Since then, things been bland and depressing. Like a void started growing in me and the attempt to talk to him will only fix it. I somehow feel like this is my fault and I should apologize but I don't know what for. He is forgiving but I'm not sure if he'll forgive me. I just feel so guilty.

So what should I do?

Contact him?

Or

Move on and try to forget?

This is very helpful. This is the only place I can ask this sort of thing. I just don't want to make things worse. I'm sure we all been to that place where you just have to fix things to be satisfied. I just need to know what to do.

It hurts. It really does.