Earlier Yesterday:
Me: *walks by School Crush's English class*
School Crush: *giving a speech about civility* *sounds like a well-scholared college student*
Me: *whispers* Holy shit...

Later Yesterday In Math:
Teacher: *isn't in class*
School Crush: *walks in* *walks toward his seat*
Everyone: Speech! Speech! Speech!
Kid 1: C'mon *School Crush*, let's hear your speech!
School Crush: *walks back up front*
Friend 1: C'mon *School Crush*!
School Crush: Okay, let's get something straight: I'm not. *walks back to his seat*
Entire Class: 0_0
Friend 1: *grabs my shoulder and pulls me back* *whispers* Did he just-
School Crush: Well let me clear that up, I'm about as straight as a semicircle. I'm half straight, half curved.
Me: Yup, he just came out as bi.