Okay these two would never cheat on Gen (don't know how to spell her full name) and Daneel, but I love them both and their children are adorable. And I am so sorry if they are reading this.

You felt your heart pound profusely as you held the letter close to you. For 48 hours, you have waited for this moment. A few weeks ago, Jared surprised you with big news. Something that you honestly didn't see coming.
He was going to get married to the beautiful, and talented Gen. The girl you grew close with over the years and someone you considered a very important part of your life. Until the moment you realized that you were going to lose Jared.
You were going to lose him to someone else. Watch him grow old with her, and make a family of their own. And though you knew you should be ecstatic for them both, you couldn't. And thats when it hit you.
You were in love with him.
Those feelings were pushed aside, many years ago. After the two of you both decided to end the short romance and just be friends, because neither of you could bear the thought of losing one another. And the way things were going for you both, you were on the path of something ugly. And that wasn't something you guys could risk.
"You going to stay for the reveal?" Jensen muttered, his mouth filled with gummy bears.
You shook your head, feeling your throat begin to knot. "N-no. I have to talk to Felicia about something." You hesitated, trying to refrain from crying. Your emotions were all over the place, and honestly you weren't sure how to handle it.
He eyed you for a moment, scanning your face for bluff. Jensen was a brother to you. After meeting him, you two instantly clicked and he has been a close friend ever since.
"You okay?" He asked.
You opened your mouth, but the door swung open and Jared along with Rob and Richard, made their way in.
You have been keeping your distance from Jared ever since he told you. You ignored his calls, ignored his texts. Today was the first time you saw him. And you couldn't help but feel sick.
"Hey! I didn't know you were here." Jared smiled, embracing you in his arms.
His scent was overbearing, but kept you on a high. Until he released, smiling down at you.
"I wasn't planning on it. But Richard convinced me to." You said shyly.
Richard flashed a soft smirk. He was the only one who knew exactly how you felt for the guy. He was the only one who understood the pain you were feeling every time you saw them together.
"Well I have to go." You forced out. "Break a leg out there you guys."
They all let out a chuckle and nodded.
"Hey, wanna get some drinks after? I missed you." Jared asked.
You swallowed hard as his words caused an ache to course through you. Something you were beginning to get used too. "S-Sure." you exhaled.
Before he had time to react, you practically ran out of the room. As the door closed behind you, you let out a breath you didnt know you were holding. You leaned against the wall, and looked up to the ceiling. "You can do this." You whispered to yourself.
———————-
As a few hours passed, it was finally time for the cast to make their way up to the panel. You met up with Richard, and handed him the letter.
"You sure about this?" You whispered.
He nodded, pursing his lips. "You have to tell him, Y/N. He deserves to know."
You nodded and gave him the letter. He pulled you in for a quick hug, and made his way on stage. Waving to the crowd, as they all cheered, he quickly placed the letter behind Jared's name and walked over to the podium.
"Hey Y/N!" A familiar voice rang from behind, making you jump.
"Shit Jared-" You panted, pressing your hand to your chest. "You scared me!"
He let out a chuckle, his shoulders bouncing up and down. "Sorry. I forgot how much of a drama queen you were."
You squinted your eyes at him, and playfully hit his arm. "Shut up."
Hearing him laugh was something you wish you could hear forever. It was like a soft melody ringing in your ears. And it always made you smile.
"Why haven't you been returning my calls?" He asked, growing serious now.
Your heart began to pace and though you wanted to tell him right there and then, you couldn't.
"Okay Jared, you are about to go up." Cliff stated.
You gave him a quick hug and took a step back. "Good luck out there."
Turning on your heels, you made your way back out to the crowd. Jared kept his gaze on you. He was so happy to see you today. You have been to every convention and every comic con with him. This was something you both shared together. Having you by his side through all of this, during the crazy uproar of the show, made him feel at ease with it all. He could never imagine doing any of this without you.
"Okay, you are up."
You felt your heart pound profusely as you stayed close to the door, staring up at the boys. It was time for him to finally read your letter. You couldn't help but feel anxious and nervous at the same time.
Rob was cracking a joke with Misha as Richard leaned over to Jared, pointing at the letter in front of him. "Y/N left this for you." He whispered.
Jared took the paper into his hands, unfolding it as he glanced up at you for a moment. Your breath hitched, and you couldn't handle the anxiety. So you slipped out of the room, and ran as far away from there as possible.
His eyes gazed at the words your wrote on the letter. Feeling his stomach flutter and his heart drop to the pit of his stomach.
Dear Jared,
Where do I even begin?
I guess there is no way to say this. So here it is...I love you. I have always loved you and I dont think I ever will stop. When you told me you two were engaged, it killed me. It felt like you ripped my heart out and stomped on it right in front of me.
I don't want to hold anything back from you anymore. I cant, because you deserve to know. I held my tongue for too long, and now i think I'm too late. So this is my goodbye. I cant be here and watch you marry her. I cant watch you two fall more in love. I cant pretend I dont feel this way for you because every time I see you kiss her, or see the way you look at her, I die a little.
I hope you two have a great life together, I really do because All I want is for you to be happy Jared. I love you, and I always will. Im so sorry. Goodbye.
-Y/N.
He swallowed hard, feeling tears well as he stared intently at the water bottle in front of him. Jared felt as if he was hit by a truck. His chest ached, and his stomach churned.
He was confused, hurt, and most of all, angry. How could you do this to him now. How could you tell him that you couldn't be in his life? His throat knotted, making it hard to even breathe. And all he wanted to do was storm out of there. To find you.
His mind was racing with different emotions, different thoughts. He didn't know what to do.
But with all of that, he knew one thing was for sure. One thing he has been trying to push away, something he tried to brush off as nothing.
He was in love with you too. Since the day you two spent the night out under the stars, 4 years ago, all he wanted to say, all he ever wanted to tell you was that he loves you. And it scared him.

During the Panel, Jared tried to focus on anything but you and the letter. And no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't.
Jensen would nudge his side, snapping him out of his daze. But then he would hear a simple word that reminded him of you and go back to that letter.
"So, Jared has something extremely important and exciting he'd like to share with you all." Rob muttered.
The crowd was quiet and Jared knew it was time to tell them about his engagement with Gen.
The crowd roared with applause, snapping pictures and some even screamed 'OTP' Jared and the others all shot their gaze over to the right side of the stage, where Gen was standing, waving at the audience.
Jared couldn't help but swallow hard as he met her gaze. He loved her. He really did, but something felt off and he couldn't figure out why.
She made her way over to his side, and quickly pressed her lips against his. "Hey babe." She smiled.
"Oh look! Sam and Ruby, the power yet demonic couple." Rich exclaimed, making everyone in the room laugh.
"You ready to tell them?" She whispered just loud enough for him to hear.
He forced a smile, and nodded, propping up on to his feet. She intertwined her fingers with his as they both turned to face the crowd.
"Gen and I are getting married." He yelled.
Everyone screamed, jumping out of their seats and cheering. Gen was all smiles, her face was red and her eyes glistened under the spot lights. She was beautiful. Breath taking. And Jared knew how lucky he was to have someone like her want to spend the rest of her life with him. But he couldn't shake you off.

As the panel came to an end, you were trying to keep your composure. You decided to meet up with Felicia and Osric out by the walking dead panel.
They were both cosplaying as characters, and you felt out of place.
"So why aren't you with Jared right now?" Osric asked, fixing his wig.
You shrugged your shoulders, taking in a deep breath. "It's the same thing every year. Besides, he has Gen now." Just by saying that, you felt your stomach churn.
"Speaking of Jared-" Felicia muttered. "He's right over there."
You slowly turned your gaze over, feeling your heart begin to race.
He was standing with Jensen and Misha at the autograph table, laughing about whatever they were talking about.
He looked so happy, and it killed you because now you know that he doesn't feel the same for you. If he did, he would've ran to you, right?
You cleared your throat, and turned your attention back to Osric, and smiled. "Wanna go to the beach tonight? Have a little bonfire?" He and Felicia flashed a smile, and nodded. "Fuck yeah!" They both squealed.
You let out a soft chuckle, until you felt warm hands cover your eyes completely. "Guess who?"
That voice sent shivers through out your body. It was a voice you knew very well.
"Gen." You yelped.
She chuckled, giving you a tight hug and pecking your cheek. "Hey girly." She smiled.
"Hey." You stammered, feeling guilt and also agony wash over you.
You swallowed hard, trying to even your breathing and pretend as if everything were fine.
"So I just talked to Jared and Jensen, maybe we could all go out for some drinks after this?" She muttered.
"Well we were all thinking about going to the beach tonight. You all should come. It'd be fun!"
You froze in your stance, feeling as if every inch of you turned into solid cement.
"Oh my gosh that sounds amazing."
Jared was preoccupied with his fans to even notice what was happening a few feet away from him.
Until a girl with long brunette hair, who was cosplaying as Dean Winchester, made her way up to Jared. A smile was plastered on to her face, along with tears streaming down her cheeks.
He leaned over, taking her hand into his, making her shudder.
"H-hi!" She smiled. "I'm sorry, I'm really nervous."
He let out a chuckle, shaking his head. "It's okay babe. Just breathe."
She did as she was told and took in two deep breaths. "I just wanna say that you have inspired me so much. And I don't know where I would be without you." She blurted out, crying harder now.
He flashed a soft smile, and pulled her in as much as he could.
"Thank you, that really means so much to me." He whispered.
She slid the photo of him and Jensen over, along with a pen for him to use.
He signed his name, along with a smiley face and handed it back to her. "Hope to see you again soon. And thanks for the kind words."
She flashed a smile, feeling as if her life has been officially made. "Also, I want to congratulate you on your engagement!" She squealed.
His lips curved up, and he nodded shyly. "Thank you."
The next fan appeared right before his eyes, dressed as Abaddon.
"Can I just say that supernatural has saved my life. You and Jensen mean so much to me, it's crazy." She was shaking as she stood before him.
He let out a chuckle, and leaned over, taking her hand. "And you mean so much to us."
He cheeks burned, and her heart felt as if it had skipped a beat.
"Are you and Y/N okay?" She asked. "Because we haven't seen her today, and you both haven't had a tweet war in a while."
Jared swallowed hard, forcing himself to smile. "Y-yea! Y/N and I are great. We have just been super busy." He stated. "But she's here."
Her lit up and she clapped her hands together. "Good! Because you guys are seriously my OTP. I know you are engaged to Gen and all, but I really think you and Y/N are perfect for each other." She blurted.
Jared only chuckled, feeling his stomach flutter as he waved her good bye.
Jensen nudged his side, capturing his attention. "See, I'm not the only one who thinks that." He whispered.
Jared playfully rolled his eyes, until he met your silhouette.
You were standing there, with your fake smile you always put on whenever you felt uncomfortable.
Jared knew you like the back of his hand. Though sometimes he can't tell whether you are lying or not, he knows that you cry when your upset. He knows that during awkward situations, you can't help but to giggle. He knows that no matter what, you will bend over backwards for anyone you love. And those were just some of the things he loved about you.
His attention was caught by gen who was only standing a few inches next to you. His stomach was churning and the memory of the letter flooded his mind.
This was going to be a long day.

Hours passed, and you and some of the crew were all huddled at the beach, laughing over drinks and some food.
You were with Misha, Richard and Rob, talking about Star Wars.
"But see, what I don't get is why they decided to start it on episode 4? I mean, wouldn't it make sense to start at the beginning!" Rob exclaimed taking a swig of his beer.?
"What start at the beginning?" Jensen grunted as he made his way over.
You turned to meet his gaze, only to meet brown caramel eyes.
Jared flashed clenched his jaw shut, pursing his lips as he shot his gaze elsewhere.
Was he really that pissed off at you?
Jensen took you in for a tight hug.
"We were just talking about Star Wars." Rich stated.
Jensen nodded and flashed a smirk. "Of course you dorks were."
You playfully swatted his arm and scrunched your nose at him. "Hey, don't you dare make fun of us geeks. You're just mad because you aren't as awesome as us." You said matter of fact.
He tilted his head back and belted out into laughter. "Yea okay." He stated.
As hours rolled by, you have caught yourself glancing over at Jared. Who not once have you the time of day.
Everyone noticed there was tension, but didn't want to pry into what happened.
"We need more beers!" Felicia yelled, curling up next to Osric.
"I'll get them." You started for the truck, that was parked up over the small hill.
"I'll help." Jared followed close behind, making your heart beat rapidly.
As you unlocked the trunk to the truck, jared opened the cooler.
You felt your stomach twist, and your heart pound profusely, thudding in your ears.
"Thanks." You whispered.
"Don't mention it." He snarled.
It might be the alcohol or even the adrenaline pulsing through, but whatever it was, you just couldn't take it anymore. "Jared please don't be like this." You muttered.
He snapped his gaze to you, growing with rage. "Are you fucking kidding me?" He grunted. "How else am I suppose to be? Happy? You fucking wrote me a letter, didn't even have the decency to say it to my face."
"I was scared!" You yelped. Feeling the tears begin to well.
"That was a slap in the face. You saying goodbye without giving me a chance to say anything, hurts." He groaned.
"What is there to say Jared?! You're engaged! You and Gen are going to get married!" You felt your voice raise. "There's nothing you can say. I'm too late." With the last word, the tears broke through the seal and stained your cheeks.
Jared felt a lump form in his throat. He hated seeing you cry, especially when it was him who caused you to cry in the first place. "Y/N, for six years now, you have been the only girl I could count on in my life. Other than my mom and sister of course." He lightly chuckled. "You are probably one of the most important people in my life. And reading that letter killed me. It felt like you just-"
You lingered on every word he spewed, waiting for him to spit out whatever he was holding back.
"Why didn't you tell me before I proposed? I mean you had a lot of chances Y/N. We stayed up until 4 in the morning playing video games! I helped you paint your apartment for three days! I even spent the night at your place countless of times! Why didn't you tell me?!"
"Would it have made a difference?" Your voice shook.
This was it, the moment he waited for. To finally have the chance to come out and say that he loves you. But as he opened his mouth to speak, he was interrupted by the sounds of footsteps.
"Damn, did you two get lost or something?" Matt cackled, reaching for the cooler.
Jared cleared his throat, forcing a crooked smile. "Yea, almost thought we were in the North Pole." He said sarcastically.
Matt belted out in laughter as they started back towards the bonfire.
You felt as if you were glued in your shoes. Not able to move.
You had one question roaming your mind.
What was he going to say?

The night was a blur. You could only remember bits and pieces of it. As if someone had cut out parts of a movie and made you watch it.
Your head was pounding profusely as the light from the sun peaked through the drapes that hung over the window. It seemed brighter than usual, and it made your head hurt even more.
As you groggily fluttered your eyes open, you couldn't help but notice something out of the ordinary.
The fabric of the sheets draped over your body. You were in nothing but your black laced panties and your bra. But you weren't quite sure as to why.
The bed shifted and a soft grunt filled the air, catching your attention.
You turned to see the stranger who laid perfectly still beside you, your eyes grew wide and your breath hitched.
"Jensen?" You forced out.
His eyes fluttered as he stretched the morning away. His gaze met your for a moment, and he smiled. Not even a second later, the realization of the situation dawned on him, making him jump up and out of bed.
His eyes were wide. Wider than yours and he looked as if he were about to pass out.
You held the covers close to you, feeling guilt and regret wash over you.
"What the hell happened?!" You muttered.
He shrugged his shoulders, paving the room, back and forth as he ran his hand through his hair.
You felt at ease when you noticed he was still in his boxers.
"I don't know. All I remember was talking to Jared about you and then-"
"Wait, about me? Why?" You interrupted.
Jensen stopped in his stance, and met your gaze. He knew exactly how Jared felt about you. He knew before Jared knew himself. But seeing you there, in bed with your hair a mess and almost naked, he couldn't bring himself to say it.
"I-I don't remember." He lied.
You felt your lips drop into a frown and your stomach churn. After the conversation you two had, you couldn't help but think only negatively.
"Dammit." Jensen groaned, rubbing his temples. "Everything is so screwed up."
You sat up, holding the sheets over your chest. "Maybe nothing happened." You whispered.
"Yeah, maybe. Hopefully." Jensen muttered.
He retrieved his clothes, and slipped them on.
You did as well, throwing your hair up into a messy bun. You found your phone, face down on the floor by the foot of the bed.
You shook your head. Must have been one hell of a night. As you turned the phone on, you couldn't help but feel a sudden relief as you read your unsent message to Jared.
'I can't do this no more. I love you Jared and you are big part of my life. I don't want anyone but you. J is here passed out drink and all I want is you to be here instead.'
And that's when you remembered. Jensen was letting you cry about Jared to him. Which is why he walked you back to the hotel. You were a drunken mess.
You had dropped all the water had given you to drink, on your clothes. Which was why you stripped down. And J, well he sleeps in his boxers. Something's he's always done.
As Jensen scurried through the hotel, looking for his other shoe, you were finally able to breathe.
"Nothing happened." You stated, flashing a smile.
He shot his gaze to you, furrowing his brows. "Are you sure?"
"Yea, you were only being an amazing friend." Your lips curved. "Nothing happened."
He let out a long sigh of relief, and smiled. "Oh thank god!"
You playfully swatted his arm, and acted upset. "Hey! You'd be lucky to have me thank you very much!"
Jensen belted out into laughter, throwing his hands in surrender. "T-that's what I meant!"
You felt your stomach constrict from laughing with him. And as you were coming down, you rested your head on his shoulder. "Thanks for being here for me." You muttered.
You couldn't see, but Jensen was smiling. He loved you more than you knew. And all he ever wanted was for you to be happy. "I'll always be here for you." He whispered, pressing his lips to your head.
There was a slight knock at the door, causing you both to jump.
Jensen made his way over, and opened the door.
Jared met his gaze, furrowing his brows immediately as he glanced back at you then to Jensen once again.
"Good morning." Jensen smiled.
"Good morning!" Gen squealed, as she bit on her lower lip, raising her eye brows.
Jared pursed his lips, looking back at you. Anger and pain struck through him. As if he were stabbed repeatedly in the back.
His throat was knotting up, making it hard for him to breathe, and his eyes welled with tears he battled to keep from falling.
"Jared and I were just stopping by to see if you wanted to have some breakfast." Gen cackled, intertwining her fingers with Jared.
You felt your stomach churn and your heart drop as you gazed over their hands.
You could tell just how upset Jared was when you looked at him. You were sure he wasn't too happy seeing you in Jensen's hotel room.
"Yea! I'll met you both down there." Jensen smirked.
Gen looked over his shoulder, and met your gaze. "You're welcome to come too hun!" She exclaimed.
You were too overwhelmed to even speak. So you only nodded, and forced a crooked smile.
Jared shared one last glance with you. His eyes were glossy and his face was still and clenched.
Jensen noticed the tension building up by the second. And though he wanted to assure Jared nothing happened, he wasn't sure where to even start.
As the door was slowly closing, you propped up on your feet. "Can I talk to you?" You had no control over your words. They just spilled out.
Jared pursed his lips, and cleared his throat. "Not right now." He lightly snarled. Enough to notice the anger behind his voice.
Gen looked up at him, flashing a soft smile. "Go and talk to her. I'll meet you downstairs." She propped on her tip toes and pecked his lips. Making you cringe.
Jared was about to protest, but couldn't bring himself to argue with her.
Jensen cleared his throat, and grabbed his shoes. "I'll go with you." He muttered to Gen.
It was just you and Jared now. The tension was so thick, you could cut it with a knife.
He closed the door behind him, and crossed his arms over his chest. Standing as far away from you as he could.
He glanced at the bed, feeling his stomach churn from the thought of you and Jensen.
You weren't sure where to begin. And all you wanted to do was run over to him and kiss him.
"So you give me a shitty letter yesterday, and today you sleep with my best friend." He stated.
You were taken back by his statement, furrowing your brows. "Jared, nothing happened between J and I. I promise."
He rolled his eyes and let out an annoyed huff.
You were overwhelmed with everything. And honestly, you couldn't take it anymore.
"Nothing happened because even when I was drunk all I wanted was you!" You blurted out. "Dammit Jared, I love you so much. It literally hurts. I mean, there isn't a moment when I'm not thinking about you!"
Jared swallowed hard, lingering on your every word.
"I love you, and im always going to love you! But I don't want to love you! I just want to be happy. I don't want to look at you when I know I can't be with you." You felt yourself give in, letting the tears and emotions take over. "Being just your friend is killing me."
Your words caused an achy pain through his chest. Like his heart was slowly being ripped to shreds.
He never knew how broken you were. How much you were hurting. This whole time, he only ever thought about he felt.
His throat was throbbing as the knot grew. "I-I'm sorry." He forced out. His tears shedding from his glossy eyes.
Your lips quivered as your breathing fell uneven.
The room was silent, with a few sniffles here and there. He needed you. He needed you in a way he has never needed anything. He needed his hands on your body. His lips on your mouth. He needed the taste of you. But he just couldn't bring himself to move.
The sound of his phone, broke the silence. It was a text from Gen, letting him know they had a table.
You propped up on your feet, and swung your purse over your shoulder. Wiping your tears away, you took in a deep breath and forced a smile. You walked over to him, making him stand still as his breath hitched.
You lightly pressed your lips to his cheek, causing a shock to ignite in both of you.
"I love you Jared, but I can't do this anymore." You whispered.
In that moment, you slipped out of the hotel room. Feeling as if your legs weighed a ton as you battled with yourself to not look back.
"I-I love you too." Jared exhaled to himself, as the door slammed shut.
And just like that, he lost it.

Its been 3 months since comic con, and you were back to reality. Constantly working, keeping yourself busy to keep from thinking of him.
But late at night, when you were in bed, ready to sleep. You couldn't help but face the truth.
You were in love with him. To the point where it literally hurt. You hated it. You hated admitting to yourself that you wanted him.
Why was it so hard to push the feelings away? To not feel anything for him.
You missed him. Missed him more everyday that passed. And it was killing you not to call him. Not to text him and say you were sorry.
Luckily, you had Jensen to keep you sane. He was always texting you. Asking how you are and just being there for you.
'Good night sweet heart.' He texted, making you smile.
He was becoming one of your best friends.
But no matter how close you two were getting, nothing ever compared to your relationship with Jared.
'Good night, hope to see you soon!'
Jensen sat in his trailer, with Jared snacking on gummy bears beside him.
"Can I have my phone back?" Jensen muttered, raising an eyebrow.
Jared pursed his lips, reading your last text as his stomach fluttered.
Though on your end, you thought you were texting Jensen, but really it was Jared.
He had asked J if he could use his phone after you left. He couldn't not have you in his life. He couldn't go a day without talking to you, because to him, a day without you is just a bad day.
But he also didn't want to hurt you. He couldn't bear to see you cry the way you did before.
"Y-yea, sorry." He exhaled, handing Jensen the phone.
J knew how much you meant to him. He knew how much Jared needed you in his life.
"Why don't you just tell her how you feel?" He asked, crossing his arms over his chest.
Jared shook his head, looking down at his hands as he fumbled with his thumbs. "It's not that simple. I don't even know how I feel."
"Bull shit. You love her man. You can't even go a day without using my phone!" Jensen exclaimed.
"She's my best friend. She has been for six years now, I can't just pretend like she never existed." Jared huffed. "I love Gen. I'm engaged to her. I can't love Y/N. I can't be fall in love with her."
Jensen let out a soft sigh, and shrugged his shoulders. "But you can't help who you fall in love with." He leaned on his elbows, facing Jared. "Okay, ask yourself this. When you're in bed, who is the last person you think about?"
Jared furrowed his brows, cocking his head back, slightly.
"Just think about it okay?"
And that he did. Jared sat there all night thinking about it. Thinking about you.

Through out the night, Jared was tossing and turning in his bed. He couldn't shake you from his thoughts.
He dreamt about you. From the day he met you in College, from trying to ride a skateboard together. To the day you fell in to the pool and because he laughed, you pulled him in, splashing each other.

And even the day you both shared your first kiss. The night he walked you back to your apartment after spending the day at the carnival.

But then the memory of you crying and walking away flooded his mind, making him shoot up and wake from his slumber.
And that's when it hit him. The question Jensen asked.
"Who is the last person you think about?"
He pulled out his phone, and dialed your number. As it rang, he felt his stomach knot as his heart began to race.
And just as he was about to end the call, the ringing stopped.
"Hello?" You breathed, still half asleep.
He swallowed hard, feeling as if he could cry just from hearing your voice.
"Hello?" You mumbled.
"H-hi." He forced out.
As his voice echoed in your ear, you couldn't help but shoot up from your bed, and stare at your phone with confusion.
You were too tired to look to see who was calling in the first place. But now that you knew who it was, you didn't know how to feel, you didn't know how to react.
"Sorry for waking you up." He muttered.
You looked at the time, and furrowed your brows. "It's three in the morning. Are you okay? Is something wrong?"
There was a long pause as he tried to find the right words. To tell you how reliant, just how dependent he was on you.
"Jared?" You were beginning to panic. Why else would he be calling?
"Yea-no everything is fine. I just-" he let out a soft chuckle, shaking his head as he looked up to the ceiling. "I couldn't sleep."
You slightly closed your eyes, as your stomach fluttered. Jared would always call you when he couldn't sleep, and vice versa. It was something you both did and maybe it was because of how safe you both felt with one another. Or maybe because you both loved each other deeply.
"How many times do I have to tell you, no more candy before bed!" You cackled, sitting up in your bed, and getting comfortable.
Jared let out a chuckle, feeling as if his stomach flipped. "I can't help it! You know how I can't say no when it comes to candy."
"Yea, but then I have to babysit you over the phone when I could be sleeping." You said sarcastically even though you were more than happy he called.
"You, babysit? Don't you remember the night I had to hold your hair back when you threw up because someone was hung over?" He smirked, raising an eyebrow though you couldn't see him.
Shaking your head, you were twirling your hair. "Pft, I do not recall that whatsoever." You lied.
You two went back and forth for a bit, then caught each other up from the past three months. As if nothing had happened in the first place.You both laughed, and acted like you once were.
In that moment, you felt whole. You felt safe. A feeling you hadn't felt in so long.
"I've really missed this." Jared muttered, running his hand through his hair. "I've really missed you, Y/N."
You felt your stomach churn and your heart begin to race. Just hearing those words caused your body to shiver.
""I've really missed you too." You hesitated, feeling the tears begin to well.
"Y/N I Lo-"
"I should go. I have work in a few hours and you know how Jeremy can be if I am late." Your voice shook, interrupting him.
"Right, Yeah. Sorry for keeping you up." He exhaled.
"No worries. It was really great talking to you. Good night Jared."
"Good night, Y/N."
And you paused for a moment, wishing, and hoping He would say something, anything. But there was nothing other than the soft static. You ended the call, and placed your phone down as you clutched on to your pillow, falling on your side.
Jared felt as if his heart had dropped to the pit of his stomach. Talking to you reminded him of just how much you meant to him. He was even going to tell you he loves you.
But maybe you were right before...Maybe it was too late.

"You have to come! It's my birthday and dammit, I want you there!" Felicia snarled through the phone.
You let out a soft sigh as you nodded in agreement. "Okay. I'll be there." You muttered.
There was a short screech that made your body jolt.
"Okay cool. It starts at 8, so hurry up and get ready. The party is at Pietro's bar." She stated.
Before you could say another word, she hung up leaving you to hear nothing but silence.
Though you would much rather stay in. You knew It would mean a lot to Felicia to see you there.
Even if that meant running into Jared. And that was the real reason why you were dreading the decision.

(3 hours later)
You pulled up in front of the bar, and slipped out of the cab. You wore a orangey red summer dress that flowed around your curves perfectly and white pumps that slightly lifted you off the ground.
With every step you took that brought you closer, you felt your heart pound. Thudding in your ears.
You were nervous, more so than before. You were about to see him and honestly it scared you. 3 months Since you've both seen each other.
The door swung open, making a breath escape your lips. "Shit, Y/N! You scared me." Jensen smirked.
You let out a chuckle, as you swatted his arm. "Hey, I'm not that scary!"
Jensen belted out in laughter, shaking his head. "Of course not!" He pulled you into him, engulfing you in his arms. "You're beautiful."
His words caused your stomach to flutter. Being in his arms made you feel safe, and it was something you truly missed.
"Alright, I'll meet you inside." He stated. "I have to get something from the car."
You nodded as he tore away from you and paced down the street. The music was blaring, and the bar was crowded with both familiar and unfamiliar faces.
"Y/N!" You heard a voice call your name.
Turning on your heels, you were immediately met by Misha and Osric.
"Hey!" You smiled.
"Dude, you look smokin hot!" Osric exclaimed.
"He isn't lying!" Misha cackled.
Your lips curved and you felt the blood rush up to your cheeks.
You and the boys talked for what seemed like forever. Though you couldn't help but look around for Jared. Slightly wishing you'd see him, but also hoping you wouldn't.
"Come on, let's dance!" Osric yelled, pulling on your hand.
Luckily you were three shots in, but you were still no where near ready to make a fool out of yourself.
"No I-I'm okay." You stammered.
He pursed his lips as he shook his head. "Uh uh. Come on!"
Before you could protest, he pulled you out to the dance floor. Finally caving, you both swayed with the music, giggling and singing at the top of your lungs. Though you knew you would regret this later, you knew you were having fun. Something you haven't felt in a long time.
"Go talk to her." Jensen muttered, nudging Jared's side.
He cleared his throat and turned his gaze down. "She looks like she's having fun. I don't want to ruin it for her." He stated.
Jensen shook his head, frustrated because he knew how you both felt for one another. "Go talk to her or I will."
Jared pursed his lips in annoyance, and rolled his eyes.
Making their way to the dance floor, you met Jareds eyes. And you froze.
As they were only a few feet away from you, your heart began to race.
"Nice moves you got there kid." Jensen teased, making Osric mimic him like a mime.
"You're just jealous." He spewed.
Without realizing, you and Jared were lost in each other's gaze. Not once looking away. He couldn't help but think just how beautiful you looked. From your dress, to your lips to the strands of your hair. He was drawn to you.
"H-how are you?" He asked, breaking the silence.
You shrugged your shoulders and sighed. "Good. I-I've been good. What about you? Where's Gen?" Just saying her name made your chest ache.
"She uh-she couldn't make it." He hesitated.
Damn those eyes. You kept losing yourself in them, and though you wished you didn't feel this way for him, you couldn't help it.
"You wanna take a little walk?" He asked, flashing a soft smirk. The one he did when he was feeling a tad buzzed.
You wanted to scream and say yes, but Gen popped into your mind and you knew you shouldn't. "I don't think it's a good idea." You muttered quietly.
He furrowed his brows, shoving his hands deep into his pockets. "Come on Y/N, I miss my best friend." He exclaimed. "I miss you."
Jared was your kryptonite. The reason you did things you knew you shouldn't. But because of that, he showed you how to live. To truly live so you had stories to tell later on. And you were thankful for that.
"Okay." You whispered.
The cold breeze hit your face immediately as you followed Jared out into the parking lot.
"Remember the last time we walked at night, you slipped and fell into a puddle?" Jared chuckled.
You smacked his arm, refraining from smiling. "Hey! I sprained my wrist that day!" You stated.
"I remember. I carried you to the hospital." He exhaled.
The memory hit you like a wave. Slowly then all at once. "Yea, which I could have walked! It's not like my legs were broken." You cackled.
He shrugged his shoulders and met your gaze. "You were hurt and I wanted to protect you."
His words caused your stomach to flip. Why was he doing this too you? Why did he have so much power over you?
"Luckily I was working out a lot that time, because then I would have dropped you." He laughed.
You chuckled along with him, as you both continued walking out into the street.
"I would have hurt you if you dropped me." You stated. "Being carried by you is like standing at the edge of a roof top on a tall building. That's a long way down!"
He shook his head, his smile growing by the second. "Shut up! It's not my fault you're so short!"
"Hey, I'm fun sized! You're just a giant."
It felt like old times. Making fun of each other, reminiscing old memories, talking about life to talking about aliens and everything in between. It reminded you why you two were always so close.
You found a bench, and sat down. Letting your feet rest. Jared stood with his hands still in his pockets.
You looked up at him, his smile settling as he locked his gaze with yours.
It was like having tunnel vision. Everything around you blurred, only able to focus on each other.
Jared was mesmerized by you. And he wasn't able to shake it. He wasn't able to shake his feelings for you, no matter how hard he tried.
You swallowed hard, feeling your heart begin to race. "I've really missed you." Your voice shook.
Your words etched into him, and before he could even process anything, he stepped toward you and cupped your face, lifting you up from the bench as he crashed his lips to yours.

From the moment your lips touched, you felt something ignite in you. As if a spark had gone off.
You felt as if you were on a high as the kiss deepened. You both surrendered to each other. Letting yourselves go as if there were nothing holding you back.
He wrapped his arm around your lower back, and lifted you off the ground.
Everything felt so surreal. Felt as if it had come out of a movie. His lips were soft and warm, luring you in and making you want more.

And just for a moment, time had stopped.
His phone broke the silence, pulling you both back to reality. Your hearts were pounding profusely and your breathing was heavy.
"H-hey babe." He hesitated.
Your eyes welled with tears, and felt as if someone had punched you in the stomach.
"Y-yea, I'm coming." He stammered.
You felt a lump form in your throat as you turned on your heels and started back to the bar. Tears streamed down your cheeks as your lips tingled from the kiss.
"Stop crying." You muttered to yourself.
Jared shoved the phone back into his pocket, and shot his gaze to you. His heart felt as if it had dropped to the pit of his stomach.
"Shit." He whispered.

It was a month after your kiss with Jared. It's been the hardest yet.
You kept your distance, ignoring his calls, texts, everything possible. You strayed from watching any TV just so you wouldn't see his face and break down.
There was a knock at your door, causing you to let out a groan. You wrapped your robe around you, and scurried over.
You crept the door open, and met the gaze of familiar green emerald eyes.
"J?" You furrowed your brows.
He flashed a smile, as he pushed the door open and pulled you into him. "Hey sweetheart." He mumbled.
Finally, he placed you down. "What are you doing here?" You chuckled, pushing your hair behind your ear.
"I'm taking you out." He exclaimed.
You let out a sigh, shaking your head as you closed the door behind him. "I-im not in the mood to go out." You exhaled.
Jensen was constantly checking up on you. Before, during and after set. Making sure you were eating, making sure you were up and out of bed.
He was heartbroken for you.
"Come on Y/N, I only have two days off. Don't let me waste them." He batted his eyes at you. "Please." He pouted his lips.
You rolled your eyes dramatically and huffed. "Alright alright!" You agreed. "Let me change."
After an hour of going through your closet, you finally decided on a black dress.
"Damn it's about t-" jensen paused as he laid his eyes on you. "Wow, you look amazing." He smiled.
You felt the blood rush up to your cheeks, and your stomach fluttered. "Alright Ackles, let's go before I change my mind."

The car ride to the diner was the most fun you had in a long time. Jensen blasted the radio, and you both belted out, singing at the top of your lungs.
After so long of being nothing but down, it was nice to get out of the house and actually feel okay. Even if it were just for a few hours.
The car came to a stop, just outside of the pizzeria.
"I don't want to get out." You muttered.
"What why?" Jensen asked, staring intently at you.
You met his gaze, and pursed your lips. "It's pouring outside and I just did my hair."
Jensen let out a huff as he rolled his eyes. "Don't be a baby. Come on, I'm starving."
You followed closed behind him as you both ran in to the restaurant.
"Hello, welcome to luigis pizzeria. Table for two?" The hostess asked, eyeing Jensen from head to toe.
"Yes please."
The place smelt like baked bread, which made everything seem warm and cozy.
"Your waiter will be with you momentarily." She smiled, handing you a menu.
As she walked away, you let out a chuckle. "Dude, she was totally flirting with you!"
He shrugged his shoulders and nodded. "I don't blame her. Have you seen me?" He winked.
Through out the entire meal, you and Jensen had a blast. You laughed more today than you have in the last year.
For weeks, you haven't had any appetite what so ever. When you were working, you were so busy running around that you didn't even think about food. But when you were home, just the thought about eating made you sick.
But today, it was like you never had pizza before.

"Damn, on your sixth piece already?! Shit, I better scarf down my food before you eat it all!" He cackled, stuffing his face.
You scrunched your face at him as you rolled your eyes. "Shut it Ackles."
"Oh my Chuck, you're Jensen Ackles!" A girl squealed from behind. She and her friend were Google eyed as they stood in front of Jensen.
"Hello ladies." He smirked.
The taller girl swooned, as the other was giddy not able to contain herself. "Can we take a picture?" She asked, practically shaking.
He glanced over at you, as if he were waiting for your approval.
"Uh here. I'll take it." You smiled.
You snapped the picture and then was asked to take one with them as well.
"Please! Is Jared here too?!" The taller girl asked, calling you over.
Jensen took the phone from your hand. Even though this wasn't your first time being asked this, you still weren't used to the attention.
"Nah, Jared is back home." Jensen answered for you.
Just hearing his name made your stomach jump. The night was going so well too.
"Probably planning the wedding with soon to be Mrs. moose." The girls chuckled.
"But I was rooting for Y/N. You and Jared are my OTP. I want a friendship like your guys." She stated, throwing her arms around you as jensen snapped the pic.
You forced a smile, wanting nothing more than to go home and hide under your covers.
You missed Jared more than anything. Missed his smile, his laugh, his corny jokes. You missed everything. The ups and downs.
"Thank you both so much." They said simultaneously.
Jensen nodded and waved them goodbye, as you slowly fell into a daze. Remembering every aspect of Jareds face. Remembering the the way his hands felt on you, and the way his lips tasted.
"Hey, Y/N." Jensen snapped you out of your trance. "You okay?"
You immediately cleared your throat and nodded. Not knowing exactly what to say. "Y-yeah, im just tired." You lied.
He flashed a faint smile, as he read your face. You were like an open book. Ever since he met you, he was always able to know when you were upset.
"Okay, I'll take you home." He muttered.
The car ride back wasn't as joyous and fun as it was before. It was quiet with only the sound of his car roaring every time he stepped on the gas pedal, and the sound of the rain that hit against the metal.
Jensen kept his gaze on the road while you couldn't shake the thought of Jared.
Why was it so hard to forget him? To move past the pain and just live your life? You were tired of missing him. You were tired of loving him.
Without even realizing, Jensen was parked outside of your apartment.
"So are we going to talk about it?" He asked, catching your attention.
You furrowed your brows at him, not understanding his question. "Talk about what?"
He took the key out of the ignition, and let out a sigh. "About you and Jared." He mumbled. "About how torn up you've been because of him."
You felt your body freeze, as if your blood had somehow turned cold. "I-I don't know what you're talking about J. I-I'm fine."
Jensen turned in his seat, and stared intently at you. "I see right through you, you know that?" He exclaimed. "Damn between you and Jared, I don't understand why you two can't talk about this!"
"There's nothing to talk about! He's getting married to Gen. That's that."
"Oh really?" He breathed. "Then why haven't you been eating?" His tongue slipped out, and quickly licked his lips. "You've lost weight. You're not the same. You haven't once made fun of me. You havent asked to drive my car like you always did every time you came in. You didn't even notice that I sang taylor swift with you on the way to the restaurant."
You felt your eyes grow as his words left you speechless. You didn't even think Jensen remembered your favorite color and yet he is pointing out things you were sure no one cared about.
"I just miss you Y/N, I miss the old you. And I love Jared. He's my brother, but dammit, every time I see you cry because of him all I want to do it kick his ass." He blurted out.
Your stomach was fluttering as your breathing slowed.
Jensen was just as surprised as you. After every word he muttered, everything became so clear. This whole time, he thought of you as only as a friend. But as he remembered little details about you, like the way you bite the inside of your cheeks when your anxious, or the way your nose flares when you laugh. He realized somewhere between arguing over music and superheroes, and ragging on another, he fell for you.
Jensen was slowly falling in love with his best friend.
You were both locked in each other's gaze, feeling your hearts pound profusely as the rain poured around you.

And in that moment, as he took in a deep breath, you closed the distance between you both. Colliding your lips together.
Every inch of you tingled from the sensation of his touch. He was soft, and warm, and his scent brought you to a high.
The sound of people laughing from across the street, caused you to pull back immediately.
Both your eyes were wide, as your mind raced with a thousand thoughts. "I-I should go." You mumbled.
Before he could even react, you pulled your purse over your shoulder and slipped out of his car.
Jensen kept his gaze on you. Watching as you took each step. His heart felt like it was going to jump out of his chest.
But as you were walking further away, he couldn't help but yearn for you.
He knew the kiss was a mistake, and that he should just turn his car on and leave. But Jensen didn't want this night to end. He didn't want you to slip from his grasp and lose you.
"Y/N!" He called out as he climbed out of his car and stomped his way to you.
You turned on your heels, watching him grow closer.
Jensen stopped in his steps, standing only a few feet away. You were both drenched from the rain, gazing into each other.
He tried to talk himself out of this, before digging himself deep into a hole. He tried to remember why he was there in the first place, why he took you out tonight, but as you looked back at him, he wasn't able to focus on anything.
Without giving any second thought, he sauntered to you and pressed his lips firmly onto yours, cupping your cheeks.
Steadily, you pulled him closer to you, sinking into his kiss.
As you were both lost in you own world, Jared was parked across the street, feeling a sharp ache form in the pit of his stomach. And a pain emerged like a thousand pound brick rested on top of his chest.

It was excruciating, and he didn't know what to do.