I really don't know why am I getting sad and more sad now.

I really don't know. I think it's because of the nightmare i had a couple of days ago, but I'm not so sure. Or it might be something else...

It might've been me, thinking some of my old friends, that now hates me... I really missed them all. I think about 6 people or 7 people. I really missed them. And the recent one as well. I feel like a terrible person right now, and i regret it.

I wonder, what happened if I wasn't exist?
If i didn't exist, i probably will never hurt you all, especially for those who had left me.

I wish i died when my mother gave birth to me. Or at least someone killed me at the hospital, just me, not anyone else.

Every time i looked at one of my friends profile and looked through the activities, it looked that the person really having a nice time. Which what i am glad for.

I can still remember when we chatting, telling jokes and such. It such a great memory for me. And i am glad that i have been through that.

I really missed it though. The person isn't blocking me, so i could message something.

But the only thing that they respond is like "stop stalking me" or "get a life, a hole" or something like that.

A hole is kinda of a nickname for me, DON'T JUDGE x3

But in all seriousness, i really missed that person.

I really wish i just can talk with the person, just at least one more time... ;~; 💔