I'm sorry

A short story.

"Better to be with no one, than with the wrong one."

I learned this the hard way, and it hit me harder than getting impaled multiple times in the chest. You see, I did find the right one. And I loved him with all my heart. He was kind, caring, a little bit protective... I don't know what it was but there was something about him that made me feel special, like a tiny pinch of light in the darkness. He was my everything...

Sure, he was a pervert when we first met. He slid his hand up my skirt for f*cks sake. But as I learned to look past that, I began to see the kind man underneath who thought about the people he cared about before himself. The charming boy who made my heart flutter whenever he was close. The gentle touch his hands gave me for comfort whenever I broke down into tears, showing he was there for me whenever I needed it... And his lips, so soft and full of passion whenever they touched my own, filled me with the realisation that I was loved. He never made me feel unwanted. He never made me feel like I was nothing in this world.

Flashback

'Okay...' I huffed out, slightly annoyed at the fact I was still blindfolded. 'Where exactly are you taking me?'

He chuckled, his hands were still holding onto my upper arms to guide me to wherever he was taking me. 'You'll see. Trust me this will be worth the wait.'

'It better be, or so help me I'll tell the girls I saw you peaking on their bath.'

'Woah woah woah,don't do that!' He let out a surprised laugh, followed by a rather large gulp coming from what I presumed was his throat. 'I know you'll like it. Just trust me on this, okay?'

Of course I trusted him, with all my heart, my soul, and my life. I just liked to tease him every now and then because he had the cutest reactions. Call me evil if you want, but he does the exact same thing so blech!

Soon, I felt the atmosphere change around me. And the light that illuminated through my blindfold disappeared. I knew this meant we had just walked into a cave of some kind.

I felt him lean forward, so his lips were right beside my ear. His breath tickled my skin, making me shiver slightly.

'We're almost there...' He whispered in an excited tone. 'You ready?'

I nodded without hesitation, smirking as he softly kissed my neck lovingly. After about another ten to fifteen seconds of walking he halted, telling me to do the same. His arms found my waist and snaked themselves around it, pulling my back into his chest, and rested his chin on my shoulder.

'Alright...' He started, with his gentle voice echoing around the area. 'You can look now...'

I reached up, and took off the piece of red cloth that was blocking my sight. I pulled it down to my neck, and opened my eyes to reveal a beautiful sight that made me gasp. We were inside a cave, like I anticipated, but covering the stony walls and ceiling were different coloured crystals which sparkled in the dim light coming from the entrance. I was in awe.

'Wow...' I whispered, and reached down to hold his arms which held onto my frame. 'This is... amazing...'

I felt him nestle his face in my hair lovingly, and his arms tighten around me. 'Yeah, almost as amazing as you...'

I chuckled at this, and reached up to comb my fingers through his soft long hair. He hummed in response, which vibrated slightly against my head, signalling me to continue.

'I love you... you know that?' I whispered, still staring at the gems in front of me in amazement.

'Yeah but I love you more...' He replied seductively.

'Wanna bet?' I scoffed.

'Bring it!'

End of flashback

He never ceased to amaze me. He made me feel special. He made me feel loved. Even though I had done nothing to deserve it. Especially after what I did to him...

I started seeing other men, because... I grew rather bored of loving one. I liked all of them but, they never worked out.

You have no idea how many lips I've kissed... How many bodies I've slept with... how many men I've had sex with. My looks drew them all in like flies. And I pursued them because... I wanted to see what would happen. Forgetting about the one man who made my world colourful.

Once I realised what I was doing was wrong... it was too late... I had become broken with seductive power. And all the memories I had with him became clouded. I had to stop toying with boys' feelings. I had to stop because it wasn't fair, for them, for me, and especially for him. So why didn't I?

I suppose I was obsessed with all the love these fictional characters were giving me, and the fact I knew I was broken in the outside world, it just pulled me deeper into the haze. Yes, I said fictional characters...

The more fanfics I read, lemons and all, the more distant I became from that one character. Unaware of the consequences.

The day I found out that that special someone, who I loved with everything I had, was killed during episode 20 of the anime he was born in. That is what pulled me away from my disgusting desires.

And nothing. Not even the fanfics I wrote nor read. Could bring him back to me...

I later found out he knew about my little betrayal, but he never gave up on me and chose to wait for me. He had been waiting for me to return to him all this time. And I didn't even give him as much as a thought.

I'm sorry... Lubbock.

(A/N: Do you think that they don't know? That you read many X Readers and make love with many of these characters? Do you truly believe they're okay with you betraying them like that and that they aren't hurt by it? They gave you their love. Yet you proceed to read all these fanfics at will, and see every one of them without any regret. What if they had feelings too? And the only reason they didn't say anything is because... they love you. How would you feel if it was you?)

Yeah I know this is a odd short story but we all know it's true. We do read a lot of fanfiction about characters loving us. Including me. This includes Mystic Messenger, Creepypasta, Legend of Zelda, Pokemon, Assassination Classroom, Minecraft Diaries.... Akame ga Kill.

This wasn't a serious chapter. It was just a thought, one that I've had for awhile. What if they actually were real, and they knew everything? How would they feel? It makes you wonder really, what exactly happens "Beyond the Pages"?

#RandomAF