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"Ikaw pala yan pareng Francis, kamusta naman dyan?"
Tinignan lang nito ng masama ang lalake. "Evaporate. "

Tumawa ng malakas ang lalake, tumayo ito then pats Francisco's back. But he didn't move and just stay cold.

"Kita mo naman-"

Hinampas ni Francisco ang libro nito sa lamesa dahilan para mapalingon ang mga nasa restaurant. Tinuloy ko ang pagkain ko ng ice cream para maubos ko na at ng makaalis na ko dito.

"Binabakuran mo na kagad ang magandang binibining iyan." Lumingon si Blake sa kanya. "It's nice having a time with you, pretty lady." he kiss the back of my hands bago umalis ng tumatawa.

Mukhang tuwang tuwa mang-asar iyon parang kalahi ni Dereck. Tinuloy na niya ang pagkain ng ice cream. Umupo ito sa harapan niya at nagtaas ng kamay. Pumunta yung waitress sa harapan nito.

"Kindly give me a bowl of Chocolate Ice cream, immediately."

This guy said coldly at binigay ang card nito at umalis ng nagmamadali ang kawawang waitress. I think it's a credit card inside the ranch, iba kasi itsura.

I know na tinitignan ako ni Francisco but i choose to ignore him. He can go to hell if he wants too and I don't care. Hinawakan nito ang dulo ng buhok niya. Maya maya dumating na din yung waitress at dala na nito ang isang bowl ng chocolate. He removes my cup and move the bowl of chocolate in front of me.

"Pag di ka nagsalita, I will order again a bowl of chocolate and you will not leave unless you finish it."

I just close my eyes and I hope he will vanish in front of me. I don't want to see him.

"Hannah..."

I'm begging you, please don't call my name this sweetly.

"Sorry pre, pwede bang i-excuse si Hannah?"

Nagmulat ako ng mata and I saw Dereck.

"Help..." Pabulong kong sabi.

Napalingon ang dalawang lalake sa tinuran ko. Tumayo ako at muntik ng bumagsak kung di ako naalalayan ni Dereck.

"I already said to you. Don't push yourself! Sabi namin sayo kaya namin tanggapin yung suspension." Pumikit ito para pakalmahin ang sarili. "You are still sick..."

Pinaupo siya nito ulit at may tinawagan sa cellphone nito.

"Olivia, pakidala ng depressant ni Hannah. Bilisan mo nandito kami sa may Open Restaurant, sumakay ka na ng shuttle."

Binigay ni Dereck ang phone nito sa kin. Gusto daw ako makausap ni Olivia.

'Hannah, okay ka lang ba? Bakit kasi di ka na naniniwala sa amin. Depressant again? Hanggang kailan ka iinom nito, Hannah!'
"Leave the restaurant, Dereck." Napalingon ako sa nagsalita, it was Francisco. "Take that phone with you. Nakikipag-usap pa ko kay Hannah."
"You are heartless, don't you?"

Sarcastic na pagkasabi ni Dereck kay Francisco. I'm still hearing na nagsasalita sa other line si Olivia, but I can't speak.

"Di ko pa nakakalimutan ang ginawa ninyong dalawa ni Olivia, Dereck. The both of you didn't give me a chance to even see her." Tinignan nito ng walang emosyon si Dereck. "Just seeing her for the last time is enough for me. But the both of you drag her away para di niya ako makita. Do you think I will forgive the both of you?"

Francisco pulls the collar of Dereck. Nagulat ako sa ginawa nito.

"You better get out of my sight now!"

Tinulak nito si Dereck, balak ko sanang tulungan ito pero pinigilan ni Francisco ang kamay ko.

"Hannah... Let's talk."

I close my eyes to calm down and block this emotion or else it will be bad for me. I want to be alright, I don't want to get scared everytime I see him. I just want to move on and have my life back then.

Happy and contented, I want that life of mine back.

"Dereck, kunin mo na yung phone mo." Sabi ko sa kanya.

Ayaw kong masaktan pa si Dereck ng dahil sa kin. At sa huli rin naman di lang sarili ko ang sinasaktan ko pati mga importanteng tao sa buhay ko.

"Hannah, are you sure."

Tumingin ako sa mata nito and smile with assurance. "I will be fine, go. Puntahan mo na si Olivia." He nods and get his phone. "Pakialagaan siya Dereck, salamat."

They take care of me so much na pati sarili nilang kasiyahan nakakalimutan nila. I can't be a burden anymore.

Umalis na ito at sumakay sa kabayo nito habang kinakausap si Olivia sa kabilang line. I remove Francisco's hand on mine. I gave a deep sigh and eat the ice cream that he has ordered for me. Natunaw na yung ice cream...

"What do you need from me, kuya?" I didn't look at him.

All the people in the restaurant go back to their own business. And I don't mind that.

"We need to talk."
"There's nothing to talk about. Kapatid lang naman ako ng bestfriend mo so wala tayong kailangan pag-usapan dun."

I continue talking to him without looking at him. Wala akong lakas ng loob para tignan siya. His presence not only makes my heart falter. It also makes my heart beat so fast.

Bakit ganito pa rin ang epekto niya sa kin. Bakit kaya pa rin niyang guluhin ang puso at isip ko. Pumikit ako ng mariin just to avoid some conflict that battling inside of me.

"Is that how you treat me, Hannah?" May panunumbat na wika nito. "You will never react like this, kung kapatid lang ang turing mo sa kin."

You are right, I never treated you as a brother at all. Higit pa sa kapatid ang tingin ko sayo. I've been in love with you since I was young, I never love anyone like this in my whole life. Parang kulang ang buhay ko na wala siya. Kahit tinatanggi ko ito ng simula pa lang, na I will stop loving you once I achieve my dream of becoming a Violinist. Pero hinde ito nangyari I was so into loving you that it becomes a poison already. And I hate myself for that, he becomes my total weakness.

"Right."

Ito ang tangi kong nasabi. I don't want to say the truth to him. It's already enough for me na nasasaktan ako, hinde ko na kakayanin pag narinig ko sa sarili nitong bibig na hinde niya ko minahal. I'm fine living na he loves me as a sister, I'm fine with it. I can deal with it.

"Look at me, Hannah..." His breathe is getting unstable. "I'm begging you... I just want to look at you..."

May narinig ako na palapit na yabag sa pwesto namin.

"Pareng Francis, ikaw pala yan. First time kong makita ang presensya mo dito ah!" This jolly guy said.
"Leave, Zeus. May kinakausap ako."

Tumingin ako sa lalake na ang pangalan ay Zeus, baka madamay pa to sa bad mood ni Francisco. Tumango ako sa harap nito na para malaman niya na hinde siya pwede sumingit ngayon. Mukhang naintindihan ito ng lalake.

"Fine, bad mood ka na naman. Miss una na ko at salamat sa warning."

Huminga ako ng malalim at tinuloy ang pagkain ng tunaw na ice cream.

"This place is disturbing." Tumayo at hinatak siya. "Let's go to something, quiet." I slap his hand.
"Sorry kuya but I need to practice for your birthday later. So I hope you understand."

Nagulat ako ng umangat ang paa ko sa ere at kinarga ako nito na parang sako. Narinig ko rin mapasinghap ang mga tao sa paligid namin.

"My God! Ibaba mo ko!" Nagpupumiglas ako.
"Sige ituloy mo yan at ng ulo mo ang unang bumagsak sa sahig."

Sumuko na ko at naglakad na ito. Paglaon binaba ako nito sa harapan ng kabayo at kinarga naman ako nito para pasakayin dito. Umakyat na din ito ng mabilis para paandarin ang kabayo.

Napahawak ako bigla sa leeg ng kabayo ng pinaandar nito ng mabilis. This is too much scary! Freaking scary hinde ako nagbibiro!

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Hininto nito ang kabayo at hinampas ko ito ng malakas sa dibdib. He has no right to treat me like this.

Tinignan ko ito ng masama. "You are unbelievable! I can't believe this!"

Paano ba bumaba sa kabayong ito. Yes, I need to step on the right saddle para makababa. Balak ko ng bumaba pero nakaharang ito.

"Do you mind? Kindly move your foot and I will go down. Pati yung Violin ko nakalimutan ko sa restaurant dahil sinakay mo ko dito!" Hinde pa rin ito gumagalaw. "Gumalaw ka nga!"
"Then move me."

The nerve! I need to calm down first, my Violin is important hinde pwede mawala yun. Kinuwa ko ang cellphone ko sa bulsa ng pants ko at may tinawagan.

'Dereck! Emergency!'
'Ano na nangyari sayo? At nasaan ka na? '
'I don't know kung saan ako dinala. But it's not about that. Si Andromeda naiwan ko sa restaurant, pakikuwa.'

I love my Violin so much and I name it Andromeda. It's my only friend when I was in stage.

'Hannah, ayos ka lang ba?'

Narinig kong sigaw ni Olivia sa kabilang line at napatawa ako.

'I'm fine, my friend. Hoy Dereck yung Andromeda ko kunin mo dun at pag may nangyaring masama sa kanya. Itatarak ko ang bow ni Andromeda sayo.'
'Oo na, siya ka pumunta ka sa bahay mamaya. Magpapractice pa tayo.'
'Practice? Di ko na kailangan yun, ikaw ang magpractice nangangalawang ka na.'
'Aba aba minamaliit mo ang kagwapuhan ko.'
'Walang kinalaman ang kagwapuhan sa skills. Yung Andromeda ko wag mo kalimutan ha!'

Binaba ko na ang phone, I stiffened. Oo nga pala nasa kabayo pala ako nito. Pagkausap ko yung dalawang yun nakakalimutan ko yung paligid.

I look at him, he becomes more handsome and lean. Gwapo pa rin naman siya dati kahit busangot ang mukha nito sa konsumisyon sa kin. Ngayon nakakunot pa rin ang noo nito, di na nagbago.

"Can you move now?"
"No?" Is he a kid?

Nawala na yung kaba ko kanina at kumalma na ko. But only us here? I'm not comfortable at all. Parang gusto ko ng umalis dito. Nagulat ako ng yinakap nito ang bewang ko at siniksik ang mukha nito sa gilid ng leeg ko. Kinalibutan ako sa ginawa nito, I feel his hot breathe that sends unknown shiver in my system. I gasp loudly sa ginawa nito.

"What are you doing?"
"Don't shout baka bigla magreact ang kabayo ko." His hug gets tighter. "I hug you like this back then."

Yes, he hugs me like this but not this sensual way. He just hugs me without putting his damn lips in my neck. Nahihilo ako sa mga nangyayari ngayon and I just can't believe he is doing something like this to me. He is confusing me.

"I don't remember."
"You always scream 'Frisky' to get my attention. Di mo lang alam I love how you give me that name."
"I don't feel any love at all."

I saw him grimace everyday tuwing sinisigaw ko ang nickname niya na yun. And it's something hurtful but I smile back then. Because I still love to see his face kahit nakakunot siya o bad mood na siya.

"When you said I love you, after you scream my name." He pause. "I want to say I love you too but I choose to turn and not to say anything."
"I don't care."
"And I care. Hannah, di lang ikaw ang nasaktan. Nung lumayo ka sa kin dahil nalaman mong may girlfriend na ko." He breathes deeply. "Your reaction kills me, and I know I'm losing you..."

Natahimik ako sa sinabi niya, nasasaktan din ba siya? No! may girlfriend nga siya at mahal na mahal niya yun. That's way impossible.

Lie, I need to act, kapatid ako ni kuya di ba? It's better if I act as his sister, right?

"Ano bang sinasabi mo kuya? You look so much in love with Ate Rhea and I'm happy with that." Humigpit ang yakap nito. "And hinde naman ako nawala, I went abroad nag-aral ako. I just didn't greet you because I was nervous that's all. Kaya you don't have to react like this, kuya."

He was breathing furiously and hugging me like he don't want to release me. I'm sure he is mad.

"Stop the act!" I stiffened sa sinabi nito. "Kuya? I never treated you as as sister, Hannah. I never did."

Nasaktan ako sa sinabi nito, namanhid ako and I never feel this empty. Tanggap ko na hinde niya ako kayang mahalin pero iyong ipamukha nito sa kin na wala lang pala ako sa buhay niya. He was saying I was a trash all along.

Kinausap lang ba niya ko para sabihin lang ito. I already live with thoughts that kills me. What's new kung madagdagan pa ng isang katotohanan.

I was already broken to start with...