🎻

"Let's go!" Hinatak ako ni Olivia, palabas ng kwarto.
"Bakit tayo aalis? Pumayag na si kuya na mag-bakasyon tayo."

Nagmamadali din si kuya na pumasok sa bahay niya. Pawis na pawis ito at nagmamadali.

"Bakit ano ba nangyayari? Pumayag ka na dito ako magbakasyon? Why change of decision?" Tanong ko kay kuya.
"Sumakay na kayo ng kotse. Bilis."

Tinulak na ko ni my friend sa loob. At sinunod nito yung mga gamit namin bago sinarado yung pinto ng kotse. Hinarurot na ni kuya yung kotse nito.

"Explain everything to me later, Olivia."
Tumango ito bilang sagot. Ayaw kong tanungin sila ngayon, they are all in panic mode. At wala akong balak makipagtalo. I just wear my earphones to calm down. Galit din ako akala ko makakapagbakasyon na ko, di pa pala. Huminto ang kotse ni kuya at lumipat kami sa kabilang pulang kotse. Ngumiti ang mayari nito sa amin.

"Dereck?"
"Yes, darling? You miss me?" Yinakap din nito si Olivia. "I miss you too my dear. Let's go to an adventure."

Bago humarurot ang kotse pinatigil ko sila. Binigay ko yung paper bag kay kuya, pati yung kay Olivia.

"Kuya... Pakibigay ng itim na nakaplastic sa kaibigan mo."
"Kay Francis?"
"Yes, birthday niya bukas di ba? Pakisabi sa kanya Happy Birthday. And the other things there pasalubong ko na sayo." Hinalikan ko sa pisngi sa kuya. "Di ko alam kung bakit nagbago ang desisyon mo. Ba't I trust you, kuya."

Sinabi ko na kay Dereck na patakbuhin ang sasakyan. I will just relax for now and look at the window.

"Hold on tight, girls!" Inayos ni Olivia ang seatbelt nito.
"Anong balak mo?" Tumingin ako sa harapan. "Don't you dare do that?" He smirk.

🎻

Kumambyo na ito at pinatakbo ng mabilis ang kotse. Nakalagpas kami sa pababa na harang and red alert sounds echo in the whole place. Hanggang sa makalayo kami sa Rancho Paraiso.

"My God! I can't believe this!"

Nasa fastfood restaurant kami ngayon at relax na umiinom ng iced tea itong si Dereck.

"Explain everything to me also, Olivia!"

Itong tatlong ito magkakuntsaba ako lang ang walang alam kung ano ang nangyayari. This mess happen when I greet the man down the terrace.

"May kinalaman ba to dun sa lalakeng nakasakay sa puting kabayo?"
"Putting kabayo?" Gulat nitong tanong. "Nakita mo siya?"
"Bakit sino ba kasi yung lalakeng yun at kayong tatlo ay nataranta!" I sit on my chair. "This is absurd!"

Ininom ko ang iced tea na nasa harapan ko. I just want to have a good vacation at nasira lang yun dahil binati ko yung lalakeng nakasakay sa puting kabayo. Sana di ko na lang binati at tahimik pa rin ako.

"Just calm down, darling...."
"No, I can't calm down kung di niyo sinasabi kung sino ang lalaking yun!"

Biglang tumunog ang cellphone ni Dereck at sinagot ito. Nagexcuse ito sa amin, tinignan ko kung paanong frustration ang pinapakita ni Dereck sa kausap nito. Nakita ko rin sumigaw ito, nagsorry naman ito sa mga nakakita at sinagot ulit ang kausap.

Sinarado ko ang mata ko. "Sino yung lalake kanina." Minulat ko ang mata ko at tinignan si Olivia. "Di mo ba nakikita pati si Dereck napapahamak!"

Ayaw pa rin magsalita nito. Akala ko ba magsasalita ito at sasabihin sa kin ang lahat.

"Fine, wag mong sabihin. Sigurado ako na may problema na ngayon si Dereck dahil linabas niyo ko sa ranchong yun."

Nakita ko ng bumalik si Dereck at huminge ng paumanhin. Mukhang nag-iba ang mood nito dahil sa nakausap nito kanina.

"I will be suspended for 2 months sa Rancho Paraiso."

Pinikit ko ng mariin ang mata ko. I knew it dahil sa kin mapapahamak pa si Dereck. Natahamik din si Olivia sa tabi ko.

"For sure may kapalit para bawiin yung suspension. What is it?"
Huminga ito ng malalim. "The owner of the ranch said we need to play for his cousin's birthday tomorrow. Only then he will cancel the suspension of mine and your brother."

Cousin's birthday? What a coincidence?

"Ang pinsan ba ng may-ari ay si Francisco?"

Nagulat itong dalawa sa pagkasabi ko ng pangalan ng lalake. They only protect me like this pag may kinalaman sa kanya. I'm not dumb to not know.

"So nasa Rancho Paraiso din pala siya." Napangiti ako ng mapait. "Bumalik na tayo sa Rancho Paraiso. We will just play right?"
"No, I will not take you there, Hannah."

Matapang nitong sabi sa kin. Alam kong pinoprotektahan nila ako. But I just can't jeopardize their life there. Alam ko kung gaano kasaya si kuya pag nagkkwento ito tungkol sa Rancho Paraiso, the same as Dereck. Kaya hinde ko kayang di sila sagapin, kung kaya ko naman.

"Listen! We will just play and the both of you already protected me for a long time." Ngumiti ako ng malungkot sa kanila. "Di ba pwedeng ako ang sumagip sa inyo, gayong kasalanan ko rin naman ito."
"Nasasaktan ka, Hannah..." Olivia said.

I can handle the pain, I've been living in pain my whole 8 years. Temporary pain is nothing. I will play then leave, as simple as that. Kung masaktan man ako it's fine. I was already hurting kahit naman ngayon ganoon pa rin. I still can't move on from the pain.

"I can manage, you know it also, Olivia. I've been living in hell for the past 8 years. This is nothing."
"Paano kung di ka na maka recover pa!" Naluluhang sabi ni Olivia. "I saw you there, kung paano ka maghirap. I was with you kaya alam kong masakit. Pag ginawa mo to baka di ka na maka recover pa..."

I was in continous medication due to depression when I was in France. I was not suicidal that's the good thing but I have a hard time to chew everything. I was fighting my depression while fighting for my dreams. I was in a conflict with myself. Kung wala si Olivia at Dereck sa tabi ko I couldn't survive.

The reason I have the depression is because of him. I didn't expect na he can do something like this to me na wala siyang ka alam alam. I know they are worried about me but I need to do this. My doctor also said to me that I need to face that fear. Kung hinde never ako makakawala and that's what I want to do.

"Trust me, everything will be alright." I smile. "Pag di ko kaya I will shout help. Please trust me on this."
"Fine... Pero pagkatapos ng pagtugtog natin. We will immediately leave, Hannah."
Tumango ako bilang tugon sa sinabi ni Dereck.

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Pumasok ako sa meeting house ng ranchong ito at tumakbo ako palapit kay kuya.

"Kuya!" Yinakap niya ito.
"Ba't ka bumalik. You know I can live with that suspension. Paano kung bumalik yung sakit mo? I will not forgive myself"
"I will be fine."

Ngumiti ako kay kuya at pinunasan yung mga luha sa mata nito. He will always be my big brother.

"Wag ka na nga umiyak, kuya. Baka mahawa ako."

Lumingin ako sa mga taong nakapaligid sa min. Lots of guys, handsome guys specifically. Totoo nga ang sinasabi ni kuyang driver mga handsome nga yung mga miyembro dito.

"I'm sorry about awhile ago. I'm Hannah Isabel." I show my hand. "And you are?"
Ngumiti ito at tinanggap ang kamay ko. "Claudius Sin Montenegre the owner of Rancho Paraiso. We apologize also at mukhang natakot ka namin."
"No, it's fine. As what my brother said he was just scared of my being. I have a serious case of depression, and until now hinde pa rin ito magaling. " Tumango ito. "Is it fine not to discuss my whole medical case, I just give you a brief of it. That's why my brother and Dereck react like that." I look at the chair. "Can I sit? Medyo napagod ako sa biyahe."
"You may sit."
"Thank you, Mr. Handsome."

The guy chuckles and clear his throat.

"Alam kong you have heard the news with Dereck." Seryoso nitong sabi. "As I discusses to him, I will cancel the suspension after you play for my cousin's birthday. He especially request for you."

I just nod, wala na rin naman ako magagawa di ba? He manipulated me again without doing anything.

"But still due to overspeeding in my territory, both of them need to pay for the cause. If you understand, Ms. Isabel."
"Just let them pay, they are rich to begin with."

Yung mga lalake na nakapaligid sa min nagsitawanan. Narinig ko pa yung papuri sa kin na ang cool ko daw bago sila pinatahimik ng owner.

"My cousin requested for the song you have played on your scholarship recital. I don't know what is it, but for sure you know it."

That piece, the one I pour my heart and soul. The piece that sends me to France and have a scholarship. And also the piece that proves that I was nothing and I'm just someone who pass his life.

Ganyan na ba siya ka walang puso. I know na hinde niya ako mahal pero ba't kailangan pa niya ipamukha sa kin yun. Gusto niyang tugtugin ko yun para saan? Para pagmukhain niya kong tanga.

"I'm sorry but I will not play that song anymore. That piece is something I gave up 8 years ago. And one cause of my depression." I look at this guy directly. "Kung ayaw mo makakita ng taong hinimatay, after the performance. Don't request me that piece of sheet."

Yung mga lalake sa rancho ay napasinghap lahat akala siguro ng mga ito, nagmura ako.

"That piece of sheet is something that my cousin requested. So I hope you don't mind."

I stand up and offers my hand to him. Which he accepted.

"Fine."

🎻

Nasa open restaurant ako, nandoon ako para magpalamig ng ulo. And I order a Chocolate flavor Ice cream at kinain ito. I was too much depressed at iniwan ko na sina kuya doon. Sumakay ako sa dumaan na shuttle, sabi ko dalhin ako sa kung saan may kainan. And I was bring here.

May malawak na field sa harap ng restaurant na ito. I think it's for horse competitions pero I just don't care. The restaurant is in the hill kaya it will not be dangerous if there is a sports game, down that field. May umupo sa harapan ko at tinignan ko.

"I just see you awhile ago dun sa meeting house."

This guy is handsome and way too good looking. And that dimples is something to die for, he winks at me nung napatagal ang titig ko sa kanya. This guy is using his charm to me and I giggle.

"You are Hannah Isabel, correct?" I gave him a point for remembering my name.
"You are correct, nice memory you have there." I eat my ice cream again.
"Buti naman tama ako." He offers his hand. "Blake Olivares at your service." I accept his hand for the handshake.
"Nice to meet you." I smile and eat again my ice cream.
"Nabalitaan ko you are a world class professional violinist. I'm curious."

He is making a conversation, it doesn't mean I hate it. Sino ba ang ayaw na may makausap na gwapo and he looks harmless naman, so it's fine.

"You sound like a reporter."
"I'am a reporter and you guess it right." He winks. "So tutugtog ka mamaya?"
"Oo, I have no choice."

Sinandal nito ang ulo sa kamay na nakasandal sa lamesa at tinignan ako.

"I can't imagine na napaiyak mo si Hans. You are really precious to him"

I know, kahit inaaway away at inaasar asar ako nun. He always protect me at the end. Dati nga may nambully sa kin nakipagaway pa ito at nasuspend. May brother is a good guy, that's why I want to do something for him.

This guy touch my face when suddenly someone knock him off with a book in his head. Napahawak ang lalake sa ulo nito. Napalingon ako sa kung sino ang humampas dito. Nanlaki ang mata ko sa nakita.

It's the guy who brokes my heart into pieces.

Francisco Charles Klopton my first love.