Synopsis: "His mother bed-ridden, half dead."
Alex's mom is sick. Really sick. They may have just run out of food. But nobody can know.

Hey guys! I wrote this a while ago but wasn't sure if I like it or not. You see, I meant to write a fluffy Christmas one shot and got... well not that. This one is really sad tbh.

I am posting this as story FIFTY-ONE on Ao3. I felt it was very important that it be a Hamilfic, so here we are.

Please enjoy and let me know what you think!

References to my previous story: "His Father Split, Full of it" (but you don't have to have read it) but is before my story "Moved in with a Cousin, Cousin Committed Suicide".

Warning: Sickness, sadness, bring tissues

~TH~

"Hey, hey Alex!"

Alexander sighed, reluctantly stopping to allow his friend to catch up with him.

"Are you coming over after school? Herc is coming. You can even stay the night if you want! Maybe we can finally finish watching Star Wars."

"Um, no, no I'm good. I think I'm just going to go home and-"

John sighed, "Come on! We haven't done anything in weeks! You always say your busy and then end up sitting at home all day."

Alex rolled his eyes, "How can you possibly know what I do when I'm home?"

"Because I know you! Come on, what do you do at home? Read a book? Watch Jeopardy reruns? Get in online political debates?"

"Just leave it, Laurens." He pulled on the straps on his backpack, preparing to walk away.

"Fine. Why don't we come to your place! Yeah! Herc can come to. Same party different location!"

Alex felt his breath catch in his chest. "No."

"Aww, come on. It will be just like old times. We used to go over there all the time."

"No." They couldn't come over. They couldn't see...

"Hey, if it's about the money, I can take care of everything. I already bought all the snacks. I'd just have to move them-"

"I said no, okay? I'm not some charity case that needs you and your stupid party. You and Herc can do whatever you guys want, just leave me alone!" He shoved past John, ignoring the stares and whispers by the other students in the hallway.

~H~

Contrary to his friend's beliefs, apartment forty-six at the Nevis apartment was not Alexander's favourite place to be. In fact, he might even say that he hated it.

It was too small, claustrophobic even. The internet and cable had been shut off weeks ago and he had very limited data on his small, off-brand phone, so internet debates, as well as reruns, were off the table. Reading was an option but he barely had time to read anymore and even when he did, he had a constant headache that prevented it. That was something that he missed, reading for fun. Now all he really did was do his homework as quickly as possible so he could-

The coughing from the other room brought his mind back to the present. He slung his backpack onto the table, grabbed a chipped mug, heated some water and added a teabag.

Plastering on a fake smile (that's all they ever were anymore, fake) he pushed open the door. "Hey mom," he said, setting the tea on the table beside her bed. "How are you feeling?"

She returned his smile. It was amazing, she was the one dying and yet still had a more believable smile. "Doing better every day. I'm going to try to go back to work tomorrow."

"Of course you will." Maybe he had believed her the first time she said it. But she had been saying that same line for an entire month and he wasn't even sure that she'd gotten out of bed by herself in that time. "Do you need anything? I can make some soup or-"

"No, no, I'm fine."

He caught sight of the toast, still untouched from this morning, sitting on the nightstand. "Have you, um, have you eaten anything today?"

"No, my stomach is just a little upset. Don't worry about it, I'm sure I'll be up to some tomorrow." Another one of those almost convincing smiles. Maybe if her eyes weren't so sunken in or she had any semblance of colour. "Make yourself something, you're getting too thin." She let out a small laugh in an attempt to sound light-hearted but ended up coughing until Alex helped her to sit up.

"You know, I could call a doctor, or something, just, just to see what's going on."

"No, no, I'm fine. No need to worry about me. Now, go do your homework. You've spent enough time worrying about me!"

Alex nodded. "Just, uh, call me if you need anything."

But he knew she wouldn't, so he did his homework outside of her door, waiting for her cough to become bad enough that he needed to help her.

It happened more than even the day before.

~H~

Alex avoided eye contact with everyone at school on Monday. John hated him. He had to. He had yelled at him like an idiot. And John would tell Herc and he'd be alone again.

He'd gotten his mom to eat some soup on Saturday. She threw it up an hour later, but hey, progress.

Although, he couldn't help feeling a little resentful. It was the last can of food in the house. They had about a quarter of a loaf of stale bread which would serve its purpose well enough, but still. Maybe he could swipe some... no that's just what everyone wanted. A little immigrant thief, proving them all right. No, he'd be fine. He'd find something.

Alex took a seat in the back row of the classroom. Herc and John each shot him a glance before heading to their normal seats near the front. Alex found himself rapidly tapping his pencil on his desk and slowly sliding lower in his chair as role was called.

When the homeroom teacher called his name, he gave a quick "Here!" before slouching even lower. Mr Washington locked eyes with Alex for a second, giving him an inquisitive look before continuing on with the class.

The bell couldn't ring soon enough. His only interest was getting out before Mr Washington stopped him. He might possibly have succeeded if not for him sitting in the back row.

"Mr Hamilton, could I speak with you a moment?"

No. No he couldn't. He just wanted to get to his next class. He just wanted to get out of school sooner rather than later.

Against his inner instinct, he stopped inside the doorway. "Yes, sir?"

"Is everything alright? I noticed you were sitting in the back and-"

"It's nothing, sir, honest. John and I just had a little misunderstanding. Not a big deal. It will probably be cleared up by lunchtime. Nothing to worry about, sir." Alex slammed his mouth shut. He really needed to learn when to stop talking. He just needed to get out.

Washington looked sceptically.

"Really, sir."

"Alexander, when was the last time you ate something?"

The question caught him off guard. When was the last time he ate something?

"This morning?" Stupid, stupid, why did it have to come out like a question?! The stress was really getting to him. He never had so little control over his own body.

"Do you mind telling me what you ate this morning?" The teacher crossed his arms.

"Um, I don't see why it really matters. I really need to get to my next class and the bell is going to ring any minute-"

"I'll write you a pass."

"You don't interrogate any of your other students like this!" Woah. Where did that come from? He had nothing but respect for Mr Washington. He had been really helpful a couple of months back when...

"This isn't an interrogation, son-"

"Don't call me son."

"When was the last time you ate?"

"I told you-"

"The truth."

They were locked in a staring match for what seemed like hours. Alex broke it first. "Sometime yesterday, I think."

"You think?"

"Yesterday. I ate yesterday."

"That's better. Now, would you like to come inside or shall we continue this conversation half-way in the hallway?"

Reluctantly, Alex entered the room, still keeping a good distance between himself and his teacher.

"Now Alex, do you mind telling me why you are struggling to remember the last time you ate?"

Alex bit his lip. What could he say? 'I'm pretty sure my mom's probably dying but she won't let me get her a doctor even though she's been sick for almost a month.' or 'We kind of ran out of food at the house accept for half a loaf of bread' or even 'It was a weekend and school lunches only go Monday-Friday'? No, he couldn't say any of those things. It was just that- "I've had a lot on my mind lately." Not a lie. Not even close to a lie. It may not have been the exact answer Mr Washington was looking for, but it most certainly wasn't a lie.

"You've had a lot on your mind?"

"Yes."

He looked thoughtful a minute, "Why don't you tell me what you ate yesterday." It wasn't a request.

"Some soup?"

He knew it wasn't the right answer as soon as he caught a look at Washington's face.

"Bread too."

A raised eyebrow.

"I just... wasn't that hungry."

"You weren't that hungry."

"Right."

"Son-"

"Don't call me that."

Washington sighed, closing his eyes for a moment. "Alexander, you haven't looked well in weeks. You've been getting thinner and even your grades have been less than your best. I'm worried about you."

"You don't need to be. I'm fine." He said it too fast. This entire conversation had been one giant mistake. He should have ran when he had the chance.

"How's life at home right now? After everything that has happened recently I'm sure-"

"Don't you have a class first hour?"

George shook his head, "It's my planning. So I take it, not so good."

"What? My home life? It's fine."

"Then why aren't you eating?"

"I told you. I haven't been hungry. I had that flu last month and just haven't gotten my appetite back."

"I see."

"Can I leave now?"

Washington nodded slowly. "You can leave. Just make sure that you eat at lunch."

"Got it. Hall pass?"

George handed it over and Alex was immediately out the door.

~H~

History class was... awkward. He had been dreading it ever since homeroom. While Mr Washington never actually said anything, Alex noticed the not-so-subtle glances.

After class, Washington stopped him again, "Alex-"

"I ate at lunch. I promise." and he walked out the door.

~H~

Alex just wanted to cry. He couldn't even give a reason. Actually, no, it's more like he could give a million reasons. When he got home, he was just so tired. So tired and hungry and everything hurt. He just wanted to sleep.

Not caring what happened, he went into his mom's room and curled up beside her.

"Alex? Is everything all right?"

He didn't respond, he only wrapped his arms around her fevered body, and cried.

~TH~

I know it was sad! I warned you!

Let me know what you thought <3

Yes, I will continue this series, but this is my "for fun/destress" series, meaning that I'm not holding myself to anything. I shall update when I feel like writing. 

Anyway, hope you enjoyed!

Hit me up on Tumblr (Trekkiehood).

God bless,
Jamie