WARNING: this chapter contains rude/offensive language, such as racial and transphobic slurs.

January 9, 2018

     I went back to school that Monday with a little more pep in my step. The corners of my mouth were tilted slightly upward, and, unusually, I walked with my chin up.

     "I'm assuming it went well?" Kila asked.

     "It went great. I have another appointment on the twenty-eighth of February."

     "That's great," said Julian.

     My happy mood did not last long, however.

     Derek Arnold, a fellow junior and the captain of the football team walked up to Kila, Julian, and I in the hall. "Look!" He said to his friends. "The freak's smiling! This is quite the sight! What's gotten our tranny all exited?" 

     I looked around the hall, realizing that it was completely empty. No wonder Derek was being so bold. 

     "Fuck off, Derek," Kila said.

     "No one was talking to you, Spic." Kila flinched. Derek turned to me. "Sarah can speak for herself, can't she?"

     "Stop, Derek. This is unnecessary. Leave us alone," I said, my voice firm.

     "I just want to know what's got you all perky," he said, faux innocence dripping from every word.

     "Really? That's all?" I inquired.

     Derek nodded.

     "Sam, leave it," Kila said.

     "Okay, I'll tell you, then," I ignored her. "Yesterday, I went to Dallas. And guess what? I'm going there again, soon. Do you know what's gonna happen? They're going to give me a dick. A whole penis. I know that that is something you aren't familiar with, but-"

     Derek punched me. Oh, the male ego. 

     My nose started bleeding and everything was blurry. 

     Derek punched me again, this time, in the stomach. The wind was knocked out of me. I desperately tried to inhale, but a vacuum seemed to have sucked all the air out of the room. I saw a figure rush toward me. It was Kila.

     She was saying something I couldn't hear. I felt as if I was submerged in water. I could hear sounds, but I couldn't understand them. In the distance, I saw two people fighting. They looked out of focus. Everything looked out of focus. I had a headache. I needed to close my eyes. The last thing I saw before my eyelids fell shut was someone else looking at me with big, brown eyes, next to Kila.

•••••••••••

     I woke up to the school nurse shoving something under my nose.

     I gasped and darted away from the sour smelling shit that was in front of my face. "What the fuck was that?" I gasped.

     Mrs. Wilson, the school nurse, gave me a stern look. "Smelling salts. They're used to arouse consciousness. Your friends told me you fainted."

     "I did?"

     "Why else would you be asleep on the ground. The blows that mister Arnold gave you weren't strong enough to knock you out. Not on first contact. And your friends tell me you were conscious for at least thirty seconds after you were hit."

    "Oh," I said dumbly.

    "So, how are you feeling?" She asked.

    "Dizzy," I answered truthfully.

     Mrs. Wilson pulled a small flashlight out of a pocket in her mandatory scrubs. "I'm going to shine this in your eyes," she said.

     "Why?"

     "To make sure you don't have a concussion. Be a dear, try not to blink."

     After that was done, the nurse gave me an ice pack

     "What's this for?" I asked.

     "For your nose, dear."

     "My nose? Wh- Ow!"

     "Don't press on it!" she fussed. "It's not broken, but it's very bruised. I think a vein was busted somewhere on the inside of the nose. It would explain the bleeding. It'll heal, though."

     "What-? Why am-? I'm confused."

     The nurse looked at me, concerned. "Do you not remember, honey?"

     I thought hard. "I remember talking to Derek. And then, uh . . . Oh."

     "You remember him attacking you, right?"

     "Yeah."

     "Then you fell to the floor?"

     "Yeah."

     The nurse implored farther. "Do you remember Kila Santos going up to you?"

     "Yes."

     "Do you remember seeing Julian De Luca and Derek Arnold fighting?"

     "Yeah, I think I saw a couple peop- Wait, Julian?"

     "Yes, honey. Mister De Luca attacked mister Arnold after he punched you. Actually, if it hadn't been for Julian, your injuries may have been a lot worse. Don't tell anyone I said that, though. I don't get a say in disciplinary actions against pupils. I just have to clean up the mess of said pupils."

     Suddenly, I heard muffled conversation from the doorway. One voice sounded calm and two voices sounded frantic. A few seconds later, my parents stormed into the nurses office and to my cot.

     "Sam, are you okay?" My mother asked, walking to the cot where I lie.

     I nodded.

     My father looked at me doubtfully. 

     I realized that I had an ice pack on my nose and I probably had quiet a lot of dried blood on my face. "I'm fine," I said firmly.

     "What happened?"

     "I- I'm not sure . . ."

     "Why is he not sure? Does he have a concussion? Do we need to got to the hospital?" My mother fired questions at Mrs. Wilson

     "Samuel is fine," Mrs. Wilson reassured. "His nose is a little bruised, but that'll heal easily. He is unsure of the events that took place this morning because he just woke up. He has had very little time to gather his thoughts."

     My parents looked a little calmer. "Can we take him home, now?" My dad asked.

     The nurse grimaced. "You'll have to ask Principal Huff about that. I'm sure he can't protest you taking your child home, but we may need Sam's account of what happened."

     My parents didn't look happy about this, but they didn't look surprised, either.

• • • • • • • • • • •

     "What happened this morning?" Principal Huff asked me. 

     Principal Huff and I were what you would call "associates in business."  I went to the office so much that it spiked his recorded working level by 30%. As a result of this "hard work," the state gave him a bonus. Since then, we've been old pals.

     "Well, I . . . I was walking to my locker. Julian and Kila were with me. Then, Derek walked up to us. He, uh, he asked me why I was so happy. Obviously, that was none of his business. Kila told him to go away, and he . . . Well, he called her some pretty offensive names. And I kind of insulted him. Then, he punched me in the face and in the stomach. I thought he was going to, you know, hit me more, but he didn't. Honestly, I thought he was going to hospitalize me. I think someone pulled him away, but I couldn't tell. After that, it gets really blurry. I'm sorry."

     "It's fine, Sam. I think I have enough, anyway. Are you sure you don't remember anything else?"

     "I . . . I'm not sure. After I fell, Kila rushed to me, right? Well, after that, right before I blacked out, I saw . . . Julian's face, hovering over me, next to Kila. I don't know if that's helpful, but that's all I remember."

     Mr. Huff's face was impossible to read. I took that as a good sign. Mr. Huff always let his students know if their story was compromised. He took good faith that they would come clean the second time around.