18:46.

she liked berlin.

she liked the way it offered adventure and made her forget temporarily, and how the streets shone with a brightness that differed so much from their previous location. it made her think of nothing but baekhyun's smile and the wind sweeping through his brown hair and the way he'd watch her move excitedly from shop to shop and window to window.

she liked its tall, silver buildings and glass structures and the way the golden rays would reflect from it, casting shadows of rainbow light onto the large slabs of pavement; dancing remnants of what she knew was held deep within the burning irises of baekhyun's glimmering eyes.

that lop-sided, smirking grin that, when he properly grinned, bared his teeth and made his eyes crinkle at the corners and the sun shine brighter and roma wanted nothing more than to fall lazily into his taller frame, and revel in the feeling of him bringing his arms up to protectively wrap around her.

couldn't resist the urge.

she liked berlin: but she liked baekhyun more.

roma had woken up later on that same day, maybe mid-afternoon, or even late afternoon. she couldn't really tell. she'd woken to the warmth of another familiar body resting by hers, strong arms and low, heavy breathing.

she'd sat up, bringing her knees up to rest her chin on, observing baekhyun with drooping eyelids and adoration. mesmerised by him doing nothing. it was hot, because it was summer, and he'd taken his t-shirt off. bare skin and torso bared to the small, boyish room. her eyes only.

took in a deep breath and failed her attempts to refrain from staring further down, the blanket not doing much to protect her view of him. each muscle and each scar and each sculpted line proving her point that baekhyun was beautiful. too much. another deep breath. his form rose and fell as he slept deeply. at peace.

roma always knew that she paled in comparison. any boy she'd ever shared something more with, she'd been more than conscious of that fact. always hiding behind thick layers of cover-up and mascara, acting the way she was supposed to, polite and forgiving, allowing herself to be pushed around, giving a small nod and a forced, accepted expression as an answer.

she'd built up this façade, this odd persona that she'd created, in which she'd communicate through soft smiles and clear eyes and quiet speech.

it worked. and roma hadn't intended for it to be permanent, or a part of her that defined her, or anything like that. but it had. she'd accepted people's words for what they were, took them as the way the world rotated, didn't question the sometimes commanding remarks or insensitive comments.

baekhyun had made her subconsciously open up to him; she'd told him her passions and strange ideas, and he'd laughed with her, not at her, watching her with those golden, fiery eyes. watching him now, asleep and here with her, seemed unreal.

she was happy they were back, but didn't want to think about how long it would last until the next thing. didn't want to imagine the next reason for him leaving. which, she knew, was a pathetic thought, but she couldn't help it.

it wasn't that she relied on him. she just wanted to be with him, because he made her feel all these emotions that were impossible to define.

she reached forward to lightly stroke her arm across his arm. skin was warm, emanating heat, and baekyun sounded a slightly deeper breath, eyes remaining closed as he turned over onto his front, bringing the white duvet with him.

roma watched in the quiet of the room for what seemed like hours.

after he'd woken up, arms stretching above his head to hit the headboard, a loud yawn ensuing from his mouth, they'd both sat in minseok's bed for a while. baekhyun's facial expression transformed from one of exhaustion to that of a beaming, comforting smile when he saw her.

roma was feeling lazy and was just happy; in his arms, his lips tracing her hair, deep voice speaking slow words and sounding out his vowels, over her ear. hands ran up and down her arms. rested his chin on the top of her head.

minseok must have gone out, roma assumed. low uproar of noise was beginning to filter in through the blinds and open windows, as baekhyun finally suggested that they should get up, a regrettable noise of protest issuing from roma as he removed himself from his comfortable position under her.

baekhyun had laughed lightly, and held his arms out to help her up, too.

she'd gone to the bathroom, splashed cool water onto her face and changed into some different clothes. not that she'd really brought many with her. the skin beneath her eyes was deep-set and showed her exhaustion, but she pulled her hair back and darkened the shade around her orbs to hide any blemishes.

"where's minseok, do you know?" she'd asked delicately, as she watched baekhyun pulling on his shoes in the hallway.

he tied his laces and checked his phone was in his pocket.

"no, i haven't heard from him. hasn't texted or anything."

baekhyun shrugged but smiled. roma did the same, taking his answer as it was. taking his extended hand appreciatively.

they'd spent the next couple of days following baekhyun, as he reminisced of a different era and showed her around to all of the places and restaurants and memories he had to share. roma enjoyed every moment, because baekhyun seemed happy and at ease and seemed to be radiant in the sunshine.

berlin possessed a different kind of heat; unlike that of lyon or of monaco. the city glinted with a burnished sheen, reflecting silver and rusted bronze. it didn't have that sun-kissed aura of shimmering buildings and independent shops. rays of sun sank in between the various streets and pavements, shadowing across both the historic and modern buildings.

baekhyun seemed to know his way around. fingers clasped roma's tightly. although she felt as if she was in a permanent state of being tired, baekhyun's vibrance and content outlook made her grab on tighter onto his arm and listen to him intently.

"so, you lived here? with minseok?" roma reiterated one afternoon, as they were sat in yet another restaurant, hands entwined across the table and a bottle of red wine in front of them.

sunlight streamed in through the large window. opposite one another.

"yeah, for about eight months."

he beamed. so handsome.

"in the same flat?"

"yeah. chanyeol was there for a couple of months, too."

roma recalled previous mentions of his name. ears perked up at the familiar person, someone she hadn't met, but someone she remembered whose name had provoked tense shoulders and hard stares. shuddered at the memory of that early morning.

"he's another friend?" she asked simply, their tones casual, not wanting to cause any discomfort for baekhyun.

just wanted to enjoy the moment.

baekhyun just nodded. roma accepted that.

"i really like berlin. thank you for bringing me," roma spoke softly, after a few minutes of content silence, and eased atmosphere.

she glanced around the restaurant; eyes wandered to outside onto the bustling, monochromatic streets. baekhyun squeezed her palm. she felt the faint, almost non-existent electricity dappled across his touch.

"thank you for coming with me," his deep voice enunciated. "it means a lot."

roma didn't understand how it meant a lot. assumed: the big city had some sentimental value to him. she could comprehend that. what she couldn't wrap her head around was how her being there meant anything. particularities.

how could someone like baekhyun even want someone like her? although roma shook her head, and tried not to think thoughts like that.

spread her pale lips into a believable smile.

"it's so interesting," she breathed out, for the sake of saying something. anything.

baekhyun's finger wandered across her hand. dipped, up and down, in and out, between her fingers. left behind a trail of heat and amour. skin was comfortingly warm, and she instinctively let her fingers curl around his.

she heard him sigh deeply, eyes closing and resting, the same way that the orange sun was sitting amid the dimming violet clouds.

"i just wanted to say how sorry i am. again," baekhyun said deeply. his voice was gravelly and thin, and his skin was taut, as if in pain.

roma immediately gripped onto his hand, tighter and harder, trying to convey an emotion that her shaking voice couldn't communicate. hated being a push-over, but she knew that baekhyun meant it. she could see in the way his mouth had a slight quiver and his eyes shone with an insignificant, silvery glean.

fingers reciprocated the gesture.

"it's okay," she managed, not without having to break eye contact with him. staring down at the empty plates on their table.

roma was expecting--and accepting--silence. but baekhyun broke through the mumbling sound of surrounding conversations and the sound of frying from the restaurant's kitchen.

"what happened at minseok's the other night...that's, um...it's, like, what i showed you before."

words were muddled and didn't make much sense, but roma knew. it was funny how she'd practically forgotten all about that time, climbing the steep steps, the fresh, city air combining with the dark aura of the starred sky; the tight grip that baekhyun had had on her, and the tremors he'd sent rushing through her as he'd whispered what he was about to do into her ear; the ambiguity and the unknown.

the sky lighting up and darkening and everything in between. and the look of completion and justification in baekhyun's features, as she'd stood in shock. the repletion; the feeling of liberty.

that had been control.

what she'd seen with minseok--the fear in baekhyun's voice, the petrified state of their crouched, slumped bodies, the ice-cold temperatures in the still air--had been no control. the two of them had been terrified.

"i figured. that, um, that was what it was," she validated nervously, bringing her vision up to meet his eye-line.

"now that you know," baekhyun continued, as if roma was supposed to fully comprehend what that simple sentence meant, "i just wanted to try and explain a bit."

roma's eyes were trained on baekhyun. couldn't move.

"you don't have to--"

"you deserve it," baekhyun said abruptly.

she bit the inside of her mouth.

roma could almost sense that baekhyun didn't want to say anything. only that he felt compelled that he had to.

"the reason it affected both of us, both me and minseok...is because it correlates and transfigures through all of us."

all of us.

roma was lost. the depth in baekhyun's stare, and the motion of him removing his hands from hers, made her cling to each syllable. who was everyone?

"the control works, always has worked before." he winced and paused, but then continued. "even though we each have our individual powers and realms, it becomes a problem when we're in really close proximity. certain things also elevate the sensations."

she truly was lost. it sounded so foreign and absurd, speech rolling from his tongue as if he'd rehearsed it. a deeper comprehension resounded in his sunken orbs: roma focused on that.

electricity. light.

in fact, thinking about it, roma recalled not having experienced any tremors in the lighting recently.

"kai, sehun and jongdae. minseok. we're all the same," baekhyun spoke with gravity.

racked her brain and her mind for a formulation, an understanding, of what he'd just admitted to. roma was grateful, but didn't know what to make of the new information.

sehun and the wind shattering through the glass. she remembered.

a few minutes of silence.

"say something," he let out.

his hand returned to its previous position, resting in the centre of the table alongside hers.

roma's heart hammered in her chest. breathing had to be controlled. reached her hand out, too.

dark-brown eyes.

he was looking at like she was beautiful.

"thank you," she sighed, forming a slight and supportive smile.

he understood.

baekhyun brought her hand up to his mouth and kissed her lightly.

//

I CANNOT CONTAIN MY EXCITEMENT FOR EXOS COMEBACK IM SO READY THEY ALL LOOK SO GOOD OMGGG & IM SO INTRIGUED ABOUT THE CONCEPT AND WHAT THE MV WILL BE LIKE SOMEONE HELP

hope you liked this little update (: x