Icon For Hire - Under The Knife (HiddenRiot Remix)
So I wrote a verse on the night after my birthday and a few weeks later I found this song which I thought fits well with what I've written. Hope y'all like it.
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-Verse 1 ~ Ariel Bloomer-
This is the song I’m too scared to write But some of you may need it tonight
Oh there you were, heart made of glass fragile little thing, shattered too fast tried to pick the pieces up up up
And that’s the way you first got cut cut cut
Devil drew you in, you didn’t let it show Didn’t want the others to ever have to know that you were getting hooked on up up up
And all you had to do was cut cut cut
-Chorus ~ Ariel Bloomer-
You carved a special place for your pain
So it came back to hurt you every night
You closed your eyes and wished it all away
Until you disappeared under the knife
-Verse 2 ~ Ariel Bloomer-
You knew the deal, no one gives a damn
Just another needy kid, sob story in hand
Keep your secrets covered up up up
We don’t need another cut cut cut
But you couldn’t hide a heart made of glass
You put yourself together with all the strength you had
You were finally fed up up up
Finally had to scream enough, enough, enough!
-Chorus ~ Ariel Bloomer-
You carved a special place for your pain
So it came back to hurt you every night
You closed your eyes and wished it all away
Until you disappeared under the knife
-Verse 3 ~ HiddenRiot-
Laying in bed, my whole body's shaking
I'm not cold, it's just my body faking
Hurting with every move that I'm making
Feeling like the voices are slowly awaking
I feel so damn numb yet my head is aching
Voices yellin' "you don't deserve to be great yeah!"
It's not like I am, my life's fucking wasted
Depression creeping in like what the fuck have I created
Made myself look like a freak thinking that way I'll make it
The fuck was I thinking, this shit's got me hella wasted
Got me addicted to the pain I am facing
From cutting to smoking tryna forget the ones who betrayed me
Now my worst fear's killing me and I'm afraid to face it
Carrying my heart like glass, afraid anyone would break it
But it's been broken from the start, yeah it's too late and
I shouldn't be afraid no more I've always been failing
These voices got the best of me and I know it's crazy
But my body's filled with cuts and bruises that show that I'm fading
Away from reality, feel like no one can save me
All I wanna feel the burn on my wrists
Reminding me that this is wrong and I'm close to this
Reminding me that there are still people out there I'm gonna miss
But what's the point of caring when after I die I'll become anonymous?
And remembering my past makes me only wanna punch the wall with my fists
Until they turn red and hurt, nah I don't want a kiss
Nor some bandages, I keep telling myself I'm not a kid
Yet I'm fucking acting like one, I've cried more than a kid ever will
I'm paralyzed, got no idea how I'm supposed to feel
These scars made me numb and I've become an addict to how this feels
I'm sick of reminding myself about all the secrets I have to keep
I'm sick of feeling this way and having to cut my way out of here
But is there any other way out? I don't think I'd ever have a medicine for this disease.
-Verse 4 ~ Ariel Bloomer-
Listen- I know it’s simplified from the other side
It’s easy to gloss over all the messy reasons why
And it’s easy to forget where you’ve been I guess that’s what the scars are for, huh?
When we were 15 we wouldn’t dare let that shit be seen, but now it seems mutalation’s gone mainstream
I see you at my shows, scarred up from head to toe
Like there’s no point even trying not to let it show
Cause we all know: "Emo kids like to hurt themselves!"
Too many feelings and not enough self control
And I mean, does this mess any of the rest of you it’s an epidemic and we’re cool with it, don’t question it
But it bothers me, our scars are currency by which we’re measured like let the record show who let it slip and who held it together cutters and burners and honorable mentions posers who still cut themselves up for the attention
I don’t care your intentions, I just want you to know
My self-hatred never took me where I wanted to go
And at the end of the day, you know I still had to face that I can pick at the pain, but can’t cut it away
And you know what else I can’t do is give you ten good reasons not to
I’ve racked my brain for clever sayings of all the things you ought to do
But you know, I think if there was something I could say
They’d have thrown it on a brochure- and sent you on your way
So I’ll keep doing what I always do: drag my heart to the piano and make it sing for you
I’ll keep doing what I always do: drag my heart to the piano and let it sing for you
Drag my heart to the piano and let it sing for you...
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