Chapter 20

Celebes Enna Escuadro

"Fuck you," I spat as I gave the most earth-shattering slap I've given to anyone in my life. Dramatic but to hell with that. Halos pumaling ang mukha ng peste kong kakambal matapos niya akong ambahan ng halik sa pisngi. You heard that right. The fucking idiot who gave me a kiss which Alessandro clearly saw is none other than my brother, Sargasso aka Sarge, yep like the sea. Sargasso Sea. Celebes Sea. Yes, shit. "Why the fuck did you have to kiss me you dimwit?!"

Napatakip sa tenga ang loko-loko habang nakanguso. Kung hindi lang 'to malaking tao ay baka nasipa ko na ito nang mga sampung beses.

"Baby naman," maktol nito habang nakaluhod na parang gago. He tried so hard to have that puppy dog eyes look but he just looked like a wolf asking for a kick in the ass. A flying kick in the ass. "I can't help it, that mosquito looked so annoying as fuck!"

"At nangatwiran ka pa?" I raised my voice at him while trying so hard not to kick his face. Speaking of face— "Wait, did you want to piss Alessandro off cause he's more handsome than you?!"

Nanlaki ang mga mata nito kaya napangiwi ako. Tsk. Same old foolish one of us twins. Maybe I got all the nutrients when we were being developed?

"Of course not!" Biglaan itong napatayo na tila naeeskandalo pero namumula naman ang mukha nito. If he didn't pull the stunt he did when Alessandro was here, I would've admitted to this crazy ass brother of mine that I missed him. But forget it, let Mother Nature take this guy to the ladies in need of a headache. "I can't believe after not seeing your twin's face for years, you've become a victim to handsome looks. Saang lupalop mo napulot iyong lamok na iyon?!"

Lamok. Yeah right. Ito lang ang may kayang tumawag ng lamok sa lahat ng mga nakarelasyon ko. He said they're all bloodsuckers hence the funny nickname. He literally hates mosquitoes too.

I rolled my eyes then just sat on the couch while massaging my head. I'm so fucking tired from work and here I am still fully stressed out. It's a good thing that Brielle called Alessandro when he dropped me off so he had no choice but to go. What choice does he have when I'm not his girlfriend?

The pain in my chest made me click my tongue in irritation. I don't like how my mind is screaming like a betrayed lover right now.

Alessandro and I—I really shouldn't have started anything if I can't even protect my own feelings from being dragged to the mud. The muddy place called—

"Celebes." Sarge's stern voice made me push my thoughts back to where they fucking belong. Where? In hell. "Do you really like that guy romantically?"

My eyes went wide.

"What?" I almost shouted at my brother. I threw him an annoyed look to hide my embarrassment. Just anyone fucking kill me, will you? "Are you out of your mind?"

He crossed his arms and I didn't like the knowing expression on his face.

"You can't fool me, Celebes. I know when you're starting to get attached with a guy." Ah. Fuck. That's the advantage and disadvantage of having a twin. You can't lie. I mean at least to a certain point. Is it so fucking obvious that he can see it? And he only saw Alessandro and I for like what, a few minutes? "Has this been going on for a while?"

I let out a sigh of exhaustion.

"Leave it, Sarge. I don't want to talk about it."

I'd like to ask the same question to myself actually. Since when did I start falling for Alessandro? Dapat talaga ay nakinig ako sa pangaral ng mga magulang ko na umiwas sa mga bawal. Teka lang. Wala nga pala akong magulang. Parang narinig ko yung pangaral na yun sa YouTube.

"Celebes." My brother's voice was threatening that it almost reminded me of my father's. The fear in me spiked. I blinked. I don't want to remember his anger. My eyes were suddenly glassy. As if sensing my anxiety, Sarge softened his tone. "You can talk to me."

"No," mariin kong sabi. Kinagat ko ang loob ng pisngi ko dahil ayokong maging mas emosyonal.

"I'm your brother, Celebes. I'm not a stranger. I'm not Dad. I won't hit you." May pagsusumamo sa boses nito kaya lumambot ang mukha ko. "I'm here now and I can save you from anyone."

Pero bakit ngayon lang Kuya gayong ilang beses na akong nasaktan?

At paano mo ako masasagip mula sa sarili kong kabaliwan?

Before I could say anything, tears just started falling from my eyes while I stared at Sarge's panicked face. My funny brother who's the first family I've had seen in a long long time(except Clark since that moron is forgettable) had fucking witnessed my nth breakdown in this life.

Maybe it's because he's family that the tears jumped out on cue.

I couldn't even understand what he was trying to say as I started crying and laughing all together.

Para akong batang humikbi at saka'y umiiyak na napahalakhak sa kabaliwan ng mga pangyayari. I couldn't believe Alessandro's parents saw us in the hallway doing that—that quickie. They're my godparents and to think that they saw me like that with their son.

Their good-for-nothing-but-a-good-fuck-and-eye-candy of a son.

But we all heard him clearly when we were in the hospital. He'll still marry Brielle and I'm just a hobby.

I'm such an inescapable hobby or vice more like.

My stomach hurt from laughing so much.

"He didn't know you're my brother but instead of confronting you because of that stupid kiss, he still chose to go to his girlfriend." More tears welled up in my eyes and this time I don't even know if the absurdity of it all is making me laugh because it's just so funny or just because I know that I'm so so fucking stupid for believing at least 0.01% that that guy would choose me. "He's so bad at making choices."

But do I really want him to choose me?

"Celebes baby!"

Tinampal ko ang mukha ng nag-aalalang si Sarge. Nakaluhod na pala sa gilid ng couch ang loko-loko habang may dalang isang basong orange juice. Napansin ko pang klarong ininuman niya ito dahil basa ng juice ang suot niyang puting shirt.

I laughed again.

Was I crying for longer than a minute because he was able to find the kitchen and pour juice?

Alessandro doesn't deserve more than a minute of my tears.

I thanked Sarge and drank the orange juice. He quietly went back to the kitchen and brought a pitcher of the drink this time. He placed it on the coffee table.

Mabilis ko namang pinuno ang baso at ininom ang juice.

He sat at the end of the couch without making any noise. Hindi ko nga alam kung paano niya nagawa yun gayong gawa sa leather ang upuan at ang suot niyang pantalon ay gawa sa—

Hindi ako makapaniwalang kung ano-ano na lang ang iniisip ko para huwag isipin si Alessandro.

Tumitig ako sa kapatid kong mataman lang na nakatingin sa akin. Napansin kong gulo-gulo na ang dati'y naka-man bun niyang buhok. Idagdag mo pa ang orange juice sa damit nito at ang pajama ay lukot-lukot na. Nagmukha tuloy siyang gusgusin. But who am I kidding? The signature blue eyes of the men in our family always made girls weak.

"What brought you here?" Sarge looked like he'll sarcastically answer either a taxi or a plane so I gave him a squint. "I'm being serious so be sure to not give me crap."

He sighed and shook his head as if shaking his nonsense away. Yeah nobody will bet he can do that. Haha!

"I'm just really worried about you," mahina nitong sabi tila nahihiya. Tumaas ang kilay ko kaya napalunok ito. May namumuo nang pawis sa noo nito kahit may aircon naman kaya klarong-klaro namang may tinatago ito sa akin. "That's right, I'm really just worried," pangungumbinsi nito sa akin at napapahid sa noo. "Is your airconditioner broken?"

I smirked.

Oh, Sarge. At least try to lie better.

"Dad never taught you how to lie so you're such a bad liar." Napamulagat ang walanghiya. I'm sure if we're not both so distracted right now, Sarge would already comment about the clear Avengers reference from the line I just threw out. But anyways, why did Sargasso visit so suddenly? The only family who visits me is Clark because he's not scared of my brothers. So why would my twin brother who had stayed away from me for years suddenly popped up again? Napaamang ako sa riyalisasyon. "Were you spying on me? Did Dad put you up to it?! Do you think that Alessandro will be like that fucker I buried years ago?!"

I fucking hate how I'm being reminded by the horrors of my past. Why the fuck did my life get so chaotic again when I tried so hard to live quietly after all these years?

Sa isang lalaki lang ay mauungkat na naman ang mga memoryang gusto ko nang kalimutan. Gusto ko nang sampalin ang sarili ko dahil pati ba naman sa usapang 'to, sinisisi ko pa rin si Alessandro?

Sarge stood up and sighed in exasperation with worry clearly written all over his face. I guess that part he can't lie about too.

"I can't help it," he mumbled while running his fingers through his hair, his eyes unfocused but I can't shake the feeling that he's just wary of my behavior, that if I can't help it, I'll stab him with a knife too. My eyes narrowed to slits.

"You better be honest with me, Sarge," I warned.

"I had someone sneak to your OB and you haven't been going for months! Months, Celebes! What were you thinking?" Halos lumuwa ang mata ko sa pinagsasabi nito. How dare he?! "What if it happens again? Did you even visit your psychiatrist this year? That mosquito guy is clearly not going to—" he paused and stared at me.

"Clearly not going to what?" I urged him to continue but it seems like he couldn't even dare say it to my face. HA! It's funny how we're thinking of the same thing. Ah, twinning. "Love me? Marry me? Or at least be fucking responsible of me?"

He facepalmed.

"You already know and yet you're still with the guy!" he berated and scratched his neck in irritation. "You're always so bad at choosing your men."

"Excuse me?" naaasiwa kong sagot. "You sound like you have such great taste in women."

He clenched his jaw and snorted. My brother was clearly agitated so I smirked in satisfaction.

"Yeah right," he said sarcastically. "At least I don't cry over a person who's going to be married to someone else."

My ear rang and I couldn't help being childish recalling how my brother looks at people when they're just useful to him. He's like all the other people in the family.

"Oh yeah? Well at least I don't judge people by their worth."

My words clearly affected him because his lips twitched while his eyes were almost literally like blue flames.

"At least I don't run away from my problems," he mocked.

This shithead.

"At least I don't break people's hearts just for the heck of it, " I spat back.

"At least I don't lie."

"At least I'm not bad at it."

"At least I don't cheat." If my anger could burn a person, my brother would have been turned to ashes on the spot although I wouldn't really want to do that to him and will probably cry a bit. Still, he could clearly see how mad I am at him and the fucker still added, " and cheaters never win, Celebes."

I turned my back at him and started to walk to my bedroom door.

"I'm not looking to win, Sargasso." I tried to laugh. "Just a fucking good time."

"Baby, don't be mad," habol pa nito, tila pinipigilan ako dahil iilang hakbang lang ay nasa likod ko na ito. "You're running away again." And he's always fucking right. Padabog kong sinara sa mukha niya ang pinto. "Ow! My naturally perfect nose!"

Serves you right, Sarge.

Anyways, why am I surrounded by heartless shitheads?