Albatross: What do I think of that vampire kid, Lazarus?

Albatross: Well, for a bloodthirsty nightcrawler, he isn't as useful as I wanted him to be.

Albatross: I tried several times to get him to kill these shitcases in this apartment, and he hasn't budged since.

Flashback:

Vulture: So, where are you taking me? And why does it require me being drenched in BBQ sauce?

Albatross: It's a surprise.

Vulture: Does it involve dinner, with me as the main course? *winks*

Albatross: Sort of...

*they both stopped before Lazarus*

Albatross: OK, bloodsucker, do your thing.

Lazarus: Yeah, I think not.

Albatross: C'mon! I brought a nice tasty meal for you, at least be grateful!

Lazarus: I'm gonna go sleep somewhere else, now *leaves*

Albatross: Wait, no! Dammit!

Vulture: You know you could've made me bleed, and he would've gone on me like a fresh buffet.

Albatross: Double Dammit!

Vulture: So...

Albatross: What?

Vulture: Do you have a taste for BBQ or not?

Albatross: Fucking disgusting.

Albatross: ....OK, I'll get the napkins. Wait for me in the kitchen.

Vulture: Yes!

End of Flashback:

Albatross: *turns red*

Albatross: I do not wish to speak of what happened that night...