I remember the day they came to visit. They had been out of the hospital for a while. Pity they didn't burn with the house. They wrote me a letter every week once they got out. They said they loved me. They said they were sorry it ended up like this. They said sorry for being bad parents and letting this happen. They didn't blame me for the fire. They thought it was an accident. They didn't know how bad my addiction was. They wish they'd gotten me help sooner.
They didn't understand that I started that fire on purpose. I wanted them to burn. They were going to take my flames away. They found out about me hurting other kids at school. They found out how. They saw my burns. They were sending me here. I thought I could save myself with fire. I failed. I sent myself here.
One letter said they were coming later that week. I dreaded it all week. When the people came to take me to the visiting room I tired to struggle but failed. They took me to bland room with three chairs. Two of them sat two people. My parents. There was one empty chair. It was for me. I sat down into the seat slumping in. They both tear up a bit at my sorry state. I heard my father mutter our poor baby girl to my mother. We sat in silence for a few moments. My father finally started to speak.
"Edana...how are you doing" he asked. I looked down and held in all the things I wanted to tell.
"Horrible..." I muttered a little.
"That's why you're here. So you can get help." My mother spoke up. I bit my lip.
"I don't need help I'm fin-"
"Fine!?!?" My mother yelled.
"FINE?!?! YOU SET THE HOUSE IN FIRE EDANA! WE COULD HAVE DIED! You are here cause you're craz-" she stopped in the middle of the word.
"Crazy? Nutty? Loopy? Insane?" I say thinking of synonyms.
"Honey no it's not like that. Your mother is upset thats all," he says trying to calm me.
"I have the right to be!" My mother yelled again. I tuned out the rest of her lecture to my father about how she had the right to be mad at me and say I'm crazy. I blew a lock of my over grown hair out of my eyes.  I normally had it very short but they didn't cut it in here.
"And she needs to be here!" I tuned back in at the end of her rant.
"Honey calm down. We need to talk to her. That's why we are here. The doctors said it might help her recovery," my father says calming her down. He was always the voice of reason. Calm and collected one out of the two.
"Yes I know," she huffed out a bit. My mom could have short temper and was a bit more ferocious. She was very hard on me. She thinks she's perfect.
"Now, honey," my dad looks at me. "Why'd you do it?" He asked.
"Do what..." I acted dumb. My mom could see this and gritted her teeth. I loved getting under her skin.
"Set the house in fire, Hurt other kids, hurt us..." he sounds a bit pained on the last one.
"Cause I wanted to," I said in my quiet tone.
"No you didn't! You were always such a quiet and shy girl. You wouldn't hurt anyone. What happened to make you do this," he said trying not to raise his voice.
"Curiosity I guess," I said looking around the room to avoid his eyes. I wasn't feeling guilty I just didn't want to look at his stupid, naïve.
"About what?" My mother chinned in.
"How it would feel to them. It felt like bliss to me so I wanted to see how it felt to them. It hurt them apparently,"
"How can you be so flat about something like this Edana? This is serious. You are in a mental hospital right now. They think you are crazy. Please give me a better answer," my dad begged. I guess he wanted his baby girl to not be a psychopath.
"So you want a lie to ease the ache? Fine. I did it on accident I didn't mean to. There was that a good lie?" My dad sighed at my words. He was probably going to start crying.
"Edana please..." my mom patted his arm as he spoke. He stopped talking and looked down. Thank god he finally shut up. My mom finally decided it was her turn to talk. She gets out of her chair and looks down at me. She wanted to make herself appear threatening or bigger. It wasn't working.
"Now listening here! You can not be so nonchalant about this! I did not raise a psychopath! I raised a kid who was calm and shy not this fucking psychopathic bitch who set other kids and her own house on fire! What is wrong with you!" She said close to my face. This was probably against the rules of visiting a patient here. I smiled a little at her words then broke out laughing.
"Ha god you are so dumb! Both of you are complete idiots! You really don't understand me at all! Setting those fire and hurting others that gave me the most pleasure and happiness I've ever felt! Not all those lessons you made me take and the friends you forced me to make. It was always the boxes of match hidden in my room and the lighter in my pocket." I stopped and laughed a little more. My mom had backed away and my father had stood up. They held each other's hands. They were scared. Scared of me.
"Scared? Heh good you should be...you weren't supposed to be able to visit me. I was supposed to visit your graves when I got out of here. Guess that plan didn't work. But I well get out and you can bet I'll try again..." I smiled at them.
"Shut it, you monster" my mother said. She was shaking.
"What's wrong mommy? Are you happy to see your little girl doing so well?"  I smirk at her at the words.
"I think it's time we leave..." my father said.
"I think so too," I replied. My parents moved swiftly out the room and I was escorted back to my room. I sat down in the cell and sighed. I snickered a little to myself. God I couldn't wait to smell their burning bodies when I got out of here.